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  • ShellFish's Avatar
    40 posts since Jul '05
    • Onces in a while I would start to realize that I have no goals, no clear dreams to work forward too. I feel so lost as in how or what should I do with my life that world make me happy and more meaningful to live. I’m no longer a young adult and I feel that my time is running out. I keep asking myself and also tried asking friends on what is their goal in their life. Most of them gave me the answer ” Live for yourself, be happy and not worry about what other people think about you. And others would say ” just go with the flow, one step at a time ”. Yet, I’m worry that I still need to pre-plan my future like do I have enough money save up for maybe I want to start a family or when I grow old. I’m also envy others who know what they want in their live and working towards it. I have very very low self esteem. I never happy in what I do. If only I was born with a use menu… Anyway I’m looking for help in some more enlightening words / ways in finding that answer. Thank you for your time.

  • Darkness_hacker99's Avatar
    38,115 posts since Jun '05
    • He who hesitates is lost.

      Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.

      Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. – Albert Einstein

      Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.

      Constant dripping hollows out a stone.

      Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.

      Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.

      The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen.

      Failures do what is tension relieving, while winners do what is goal achieving.

      The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack in will.

      Try not to become a man of success but a man of value. – Albert Einstein

      Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.

      Winning isn't everything, but wanting to win is.

      Goals are the fuel in the furnace of achievement.

      The significance of a man is not in what he attains but in what he longs to attain.

      If you don't know where you are going, you'll end up someplace else.

      Where there's a will there's a way.

      The surest way not to fail is to determine to succeed.

      If you really want something, you can figure out how to make it happen.

      A determined person will do more with a pen and paper, than a lazy person will accomplish with a personal computer.

      The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in a person's determination.

      If you doubt you can accomplish something, then you can't accomplish it. You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through.

      So long as there is breath in me, that long I will persist. For now I know one of the greatest principles on success; if I persist long enough I will win.

      All our dreams can come true - if we have the courage to pursue them.

      The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.

      Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.

      Persistence is to the character of man as carbon is to steel.

      You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.

      Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance.

      Perseverance is a great element of success; if you only knock long enough and loud enough at the gate you are sure to wake up somebody.
      Perseverance is failing nineteen times and succeeding the twentieth.

      If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you.

      To be successful you must accept all challenges that come your way. You can't just accept the ones you like.

      For every mountain there is a miracle.

      A desire can overcome all objections and obstacles.

      Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.

      It is never too late to be what you might have been.

      Enthusiasm - the sustaining power of all great action.

      Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm. - Winston Churchill

      Motivation comes from within.

      All our dreams can come true - if we have the courage to pursue them.

      When we are motivated by goals that have deep meaning, by dreams that need completion, by pure love that needs expressing, then we truly live life.

      Crystallize your goals. Make a plan for achieving them and set yourself a deadline. Then, with supreme confidence, determination and disregard for obstacles and other people's criticisms, carry out your plan. Paul Meyer

      Set your goals high, and don't stop till you get there.

      By losing your goal, You have lost your way. Friedrich Nietzsche

      People with goals succeed because they know where they're going.

      To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.

      Don't limit yourself. Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do. You can go as far as you mind lets you. What you believe, you can achieve.

      Do or do not. There is no try.

      Commitment leads to action. Action brings your dream closer.

      Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.

      Every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving.
      -Albert Einstein

      Never regard study as a duty, but as the enviable opportunity to learn to know the liberating influence of beauty in the realm of the spirit for your own personal joy and to the profit of the community to which your later work belongs.
      -Albert Einstein

      The grand aim of all science is to cover the greatest number of empirical facts by logical deduction from the smallest number of hypotheses or axioms.
      -Albert Einstein

      The aim (of education) must be the training of independently acting and thinking individuals who, however, can see in the service to the community their highest life achievement.
      -Albert Einstein

      One should guard against preaching to young people success in the customary form as the main aim in life. The most important motive for work in school and in life is pleasure in work, pleasure in its result, and the knowledge of the value of the result to the community.
      -Albert Einstein

      It's not that I'm so smart; it's just that I stay with problems longer.
      -Albert Einstein

      Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one's living at it.
      -Albert Einstein

      Never allow others to put obstacles in the pathway of your dreams.
      -Max Well

      "The good teacher ... discovers the natural gifts of his pupils and liberates them by the stimulating influence of the inspiration that he can impart. The true leader makes his followers twice the men they were before."-Stephen Neill

      The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education
      --Albert Einstein

      Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.
      -Winston Churchill (1874-1965), British Prime Minister, author

      Ability is of little account without opportunity
      - Napoleon Bonaparte (1769 -1821), French emperor and general

      Source: Internet.

  • smudgey's Avatar
    5,005 posts since May '05
    • what are you doing now?

      still in school?

      age?

      hobbies?

      try out various activities... what subjects do u like?

      search out your dreams. and try to live it

  • Darkness_hacker99's Avatar
    38,115 posts since Jun '05
    • I read all the quote every morning when I woke up.

      Although the path to my dream/goal is tough, I told myself not to give up.

  • DC+'s Avatar
    1,171 posts since Jun '07
    • Im at crossroads..

      thinking should I move on and give up my passport and accept another country's citizenship.

      guess i should flip a coin

  • (human)'s Avatar
    1,134 posts since Jun '06
    • At sixteen, the adolescent knows about suffering because he himself has suffered, but he barely knows that other beings also suffer. -Jean Jacques Rousseau

  • ShellFish's Avatar
    40 posts since Jul '05
    • Originally posted by smudgey:
      what are you doing now?

      still in school?

      age?

      hobbies?

      try out various activities... what subjects do u like?

      search out your dreams. and try to live it

      Like I say I'm not young anymore. I'm a working adult and old enough to start a family. I' be in my 30s soon. Hobbies?... I just like to stay at home with my video games and internet connecting.

  • viciouskitty74's Avatar
    17,875 posts since Jun '05
    • He who only thinks about himself.

      Has only one goal to obtain. Keep himself to himself.

  • buugabuuga's Avatar
    15 posts since Jun '07
    • come on.
      life is beautiful.
      i might be young and havent open up to the world as im still studying... but i realised what life means. there are many little things we often take for granted or overlooked.

      have you realised the beautiful sun rise early in the morning on days the clouds turn purplely orange? god... it's really beautiful. it's the way you see life. there will be a time everyone of us experience everything is down and sad. everything is not right. it seems bored waking up to another day of boredness.. it's like everyday is monday. i hope im right bout this?

      yes,those quotes are really meaningful. but it's really up to you whether to believe in it or not. remember,no matter how beautiful a girl everyone is talking about is,if it's not your taste,you wouldn't marry her.
      [sorry for using a girl for the example]

      the point is,the sole meaning of life differs to every single human.
      i sincerely hope you'll find yours soon. Smile
      start seeing things in a different manner and good luck there. you'll be good.

      Edited by buugabuuga 06 Jun `07, 9:50AM
  • gigabyte14's Avatar
    21,826 posts since Jul '06
  • Herzog_Zwei's Avatar
    8,208 posts since Jul '06
    • Originally posted by viciouskitty74:
      He who only thinks about himself.

      Has only one goal to obtain. Keep himself to himself.

      I thought it's "To thine ownself be true." Mr. Green

  • soulwinner's Avatar
    7,293 posts since Jan '07
  • gigabyte14's Avatar
    21,826 posts since Jul '06
    • Originally posted by soulwinner:
      Perhaps TS can introduce yourself to the forumites?

      Laughing

  • Devil1976's Avatar
    38,719 posts since May '00
    • Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
      He who hesitates is lost.

      Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.

      ..........

      "The good teacher ... discovers the natural gifts of his pupils and liberates them by the stimulating influence of the inspiration that he can impart. The true leader makes his followers twice the men they were before."-Stephen Neill

      The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education
      --Albert Einstein

      Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.
      -Winston Churchill (1874-1965), British Prime Minister, author

      Ability is of little account without opportunity
      - Napoleon Bonaparte (1769 -1821), French emperor and general

      Source: Internet.

      Really nice.. Although some of them could have very well been paradoxic of possible errors....?

      Especially like Albert Einstein's quotes... As usual..? Smile

    • Originally posted by ShellFish:
      Onces in a while I would start to realize that I have no goals, no clear dreams to work forward too. I feel so lost as in how or what should I do with my life that world make me happy and more meaningful to live. I'm no longer a young adult and I feel that my time is running out. I keep asking myself and also tried asking friends on what is their goal in their life. Most of them gave me the answer " Live for yourself, be happy and not worry about what other people think about you. And others would say " just go with the flow, one step at a time ". Yet, I'm worry that I still need to pre-plan my future like do I have enough money save up for maybe I want to start a family or when I grow old. I'm also envy others who know what they want in their live and working towards it. I have very very low self esteem. I never happy in what I do. If only I was born with a use menu... Anyway I'm looking for help in some more enlightening words / ways in finding that answer. Thank you for your time.

      To know what you want and what you're for, yuo cannot be too pre-occupied with 'unproductive' things....

      You got to free yourself 1st before you can free your mind....

  • binarynwitz's Avatar
    730 posts since Dec '05
    • We are born into this world with a void in purpose. It is like a blank cheque, with life's Creator's (not necessarily God) signature.

      It is up to us, to fill our value. Stop distracting yourself with the fact you have no aims, no goals. You know you have no aims and goals, yet you continue lamenting, without action.

      Realisation, without action, means nothing.

      Many people say they don't have a goal, that they have no purpose in life. They lament, and whine.

      But they forgot to do the most important thing. They forgot how to dream.

      As the chinese saying goes, Humans are noble, because of their dreams. What do you want to be, last time? What are your interests? What are your hobbies?

      Think about the things you're good at, and think how these can make up the "real you".

      Life is the noblest gift ever given. It's a gift which surprises and rewards know no boundaries.

      500th post!

      Edited by binarynwitz 06 Jun `07, 3:06PM
  • xiaoTAKO-'s Avatar
    51 posts since Mar '07
    • - SUGGESTION -
      Set goals!
      Why must we set goals?
      1.Direction
      2.Improve ourselves
      3.Succeed in life
      Goals must be ......
      S pecific
      M otivational
      M easurable
      A chievable
      R ealistic
      T ime limit

      So, maybe you could set some goals to keep yourself occupied, and you can also be well-planned if you set your goals in a way that will not stress yourself and there's also some time to like give yourself a break and relax yourself.

      Example :

      GOALS
      - A monthly salary of S$5000 (If current salary is around S$4000-S$4500)
      - Pay off my debt in 2-4 months[Depends] (For people in debt/owing people money)
      - Buy a new pair of shoes
      - Read finish Shopaholic Ties the Knot (EXAMPLE)
      - Buy my dream Honda car!(After paying off my debt and my financial state is good)[By ________]
      And of course, actions speak louder than words !

      ACTION STEPS
      - Try my best to find a job giving me salary of around S$5000(As stated above)
      [Note:Job should not be too hard and stressful on you as health is the most important thing]
      - Save some money every week and try to pay off debt as soon as possible
      - Save some money every week or month for my dream shoes
      - Use at least 15-30mins to read the book
      - Deposit some money into my bank as savings and check balance every week [So as to save enough money for my DREAM car]

      The above example is just a reference for you,
      and all the best(:
      Remember not to stress yourself out while carrying out your action steps and your goals must be SMMART (:
      If your goals are too must, separate the important ones from the ''not so'' important ones and once some of the important ones are fulfilled, you could shift some of your other ''not so'' important ones to your 'GOALS' list~

      Source : A motivational talk I had earlier on
      (The 'EXAMPLE' is what I just thought of, ><)
      Ok that's all ! Byes(: ALL THE BEST-

  • apples's Avatar
    159 posts since Nov '02
    • Reaching 30 is not old lar... u are probably not even halfway into ur life. But it's very normal to feel lost at this age. I've have many colleagues at this age (include those over 30) and a lot of them feels emptiness in their lives too.

      The answer you are looking for is inside u and is definitely not one we can tell u. But the advises to live for yourself seems a pretty inappropriate advise. Personally, I've never found happiness in living for myself. And loneliness is one of worst kind of pain one can feel. I've never find it happy to eat delicacies alone, I've never find watching the best show alone and not being able to relate to anyone a happy thing to do, etc.

      Setting visions in life provides purpose into our lives. Vision at work, vision at family, vision with friends, vision on ourself can fill the void of a meaningless life and fill in the purpose in the major parts of our lives. Also not being able to fullfill our vision can become stress and not having vision causes the kind of feeling that u have.

      I will give u an example of my some of my visions
      - My vision for my work is to build a useful business system.
      - My vision for my children is to be a great dad. One that they will hug me, talk to me even when they are big and be proud to say that I am their father.
      - My vision for my parents is to not let them be lonely and not quarrel less often with each other
      - My vision for my wife is to ... ( Sad, I didn't set any for my wife... I remember reading a quote from Mother Teresa that implies it easy not to know how to love someone closest to u and gush I am going to do sth abt this Smile ...)

      cheers

  • mancha's Avatar
    8,961 posts since Sep '04
    • Originally posted by viciouskitty74:
      He who only thinks about himself.

      Has only one goal to obtain. Keep himself to himself.

      The first line is the problem to 99% of the population who have problems.
      Examine your thoughts, is it "I" or something related to "I" all the time?

      Get into activities where you need to think of others. About how you can help others. It won't "cure" you, but at least you'll be more contented.

      Anyway, people who have their life mapped out, and planned ahead, usually are people who have brains with a well developed frontal lobe. So you either have it or you don't. Therefore don't fret about it.

      Whatever your situation, you can plan for your retirement now.
      Start a fund separate from your CPF savings now!
      With that taken care of, you can start living day to day, without worring about your future.

      Or if you happened to be the top 1% who have super frontal lobe, like Margaret Thacher, or LKY, and know your life direction five years ahead and even more, then please map it out in writing.

      Edited by mancha 07 Jun `07, 10:14AM
  • the.owl's Avatar
    3,342 posts since Oct '05
    • Originally posted by Darkness_hacker99:
      I read all the quote every morning when I woke up.

      Although the path to my dream/goal is tough, I told myself not to give up.

      which quote you read? that ones above? or others.

    • Originally posted by viciouskitty74:
      He who only thinks about himself.

      Has only one goal to obtain. Keep himself to himself.

      he who farts in church sits in his own pew.

      he who climb mountain fall from very high.

      When one's foot knows what one's hand is doing one is dangerous; But if the belly button hasn't been consulted, havoc will ensue

  • ShellFish's Avatar
    40 posts since Jul '05
    • I did some talking with some friends and one of them told me this. " There is only 2 path in life, its either been happy or been unhappy. No matter how much you are prepared, you can't solve anything till the problem appears. Singapore should work smart not work hard, by the time you saved up a lot of money, your be to old to enjoy it as you you would also spend most of the money on your medical bills. How much money is consider enough ?" In the end, it all still comes to what I want in life. Ha Ha! Even thought I know this in my heart, I still wish for a easy solution. Embarassed I kind of like been brainless as in you just follow orders and not think. ( Like in the army ) Please don't get angry at me. I'm not saying I love my NS life. Thanks guys for all your post! Please Keep them coming so that others like me can find that road in our hearts.

  • Gunyandao's Avatar
    149 posts since Jan '05
    • Originally posted by ShellFish:
      Onces in a while I would start to realize that I have no goals, no clear dreams to work forward too. I feel so lost as in how or what should I do with my life that world make me happy and more meaningful to live. I'm no longer a young adult and I feel that my time is running out. I keep asking myself and also tried asking friends on what is their goal in their life. Most of them gave me the answer " Live for yourself, be happy and not worry about what other people think about you. And others would say " just go with the flow, one step at a time ". Yet, I'm worry that I still need to pre-plan my future like do I have enough money save up for maybe I want to start a family or when I grow old. I'm also envy others who know what they want in their live and working towards it. I have very very low self esteem. I never happy in what I do. If only I was born with a use menu... Anyway I'm looking for help in some more enlightening words / ways in finding that answer. Thank you for your time.

      sounds like me leh.
      most of the time i don't know what i want to do, what i am doing and what i want to do in the future.
      day after day pass by just like that.
      career wise i am not doing well.
      i avoid trying out new things because i am so used to avoiding trying out new things. so my life is rather plain.
      i also admire my other friends who seems to be full of drive and working towards their ambition.
      in a way, just like u i have very low self esteem.
      not sure whether u r exposed to a childhood full of condeming words like me that's why u ended up like that.
      like
      "it's impossible lah"
      "cannot never achieve one lah"
      "stop dreaming lah"
      etc etc etc

  • sillyme's Avatar
    18,709 posts since Apr '03
    • First and foremost, don't stop looking Smile

      Your friend is right, happiness is a choice. You either choose to be happy, or you can choose not to be happy.

      Continue to talk to your family and friends and understand them. Soon you'll realise that they make up your life. You just have to put meaning into it.

  • Diehard_89's Avatar
    1,565 posts since Oct '04
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