Coming home really late..
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Hi, I hv a very stupid question 2 ask here. I'm a 30 yrs old guy married for 4 yrs.. She's 3 yrs younger.. Until recently my wife has not been working since we're married.. She's a Thai n I'm a Singaporean. After she's started working 2 yrs ago, she started 2 go out with her friends 2 clubing.. Everything seems fine, but problem is she didn't ask me along most of the time.. Maybe once every 10 trips & only after I've insisted 2 tag along.. In fact we used 2 go out during our courtship..
She's out almost twice or trice every month. Visiting clubs like MOS, Clinic & St James Power Station.. Returning only after 4.. Several time even until 6 in the morning.. I trust her as she's always out with her gal friends..
I just wanna ask if this is a normal thing..? Shd I stop her or just let her b..?
Thanks for the time.. -
let her go and enjoy lah
nothing one de
if dun feel comfortable then tok to her about
share ur concerns with her
communication is bery impt -
I understand tat she might just wanna let her steam off after a day of work.. But its gettting more & more often.. The time she return also is getting longer.. The most recent trip is the count down.. I'm left alone @ home & she reach home the next day @ ard 10pm.. In the evening..
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hows everything else between the both of you?
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Talk to her about it. Tell her how lonely and worried u were and see what she says.
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den juz tell her u nt very comfy tt she's coming home so late?!
eh married liao leh, if got things still no talk den very jialat u noe?! -
Did you like...try to ask her if you could tag along once?
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I've told her 2 cut back and sometime she comply but just 2 go back 2 the same after a wk or so.. We've had a few major fights regarding tis issue.. Even if she's home, she'll just dive in2 facebook or MSN chats.. Some days, we just exchange only 4 sentences a day..
Does married couples do tat eventually..? -
I think both of you should really sit down and talk...if not...things will just get worse...
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do u all haf chewren liao?
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No kids, she doesn't wan any as she doesn't wan any responsibility..
I'm still using condoms everytime.. Sh insisted even when she was tipsy after some drinks on special occasions like birthdays etc.. I comply 2 her as I love her so much tat I dun wan her 2 b unhappy.. -
Originally posted by thinking too much:No kids, she doesn't wan any as she doesn't wan any responsibility..
I'm still using condoms everytime.. Sh insisted even when she was tipsy after some drinks on special occasions like birthdays etc.. I comply 2 her as I love her so much tat I dun wan her 2 b unhappy..doesnt want responsibility?? dat sounds bad
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it's not longer a gf-bf thing..
not say break or what..
better have a good talk..
if not it's hard to save the marriage.. -
Do you think married couples behave this way?Originally posted by thinking too much:Hi, I hv a very stupid question 2 ask here. I'm a 30 yrs old guy married for 4 yrs.. She's 3 yrs younger.. Until recently my wife has not been working since we're married.. She's a Thai n I'm a Singaporean. After she's started working 2 yrs ago, she started 2 go out with her friends 2 clubing.. Everything seems fine, but problem is she didn't ask me along most of the time.. Maybe once every 10 trips & only after I've insisted 2 tag along.. In fact we used 2 go out during our courtship..
She's out almost twice or trice every month. Visiting clubs like MOS, Clinic & St James Power Station.. Returning only after 4.. Several time even until 6 in the morning.. I trust her as she's always out with her gal friends..
I just wanna ask if this is a normal thing..? Shd I stop her or just let her b..?
Thanks for the time..
I think you may want to address your concerns to her. Have an open talk about it. It seems that the only time that you 2 are spending together is at home. Not very healthy.
Do something that can spice up the marriage. Something like dating her again, surprise her with a small gift. There are means and ways to spice things up, find one that suits both ur lifestyle and ur pocket.
I guess she still wanna enjoy her life since she is only 27. With peers clubbing and all, no doubt she will be influenced by that kind of lifestyle, but she also have to tell herself that she got a husband at home waiting.
It takes 2 to make it work. Talk to her. Don't wait or drag, it might turn worse.
All the best!
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let her be herself and if u feel uncomfortable, try and communicate with her.
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hmm returnin home at 4am is normal but another day 10pm is abit too late.
I think you both should have a good talk already.
hmm And coutdown should spend with you also. why you didnt join in with her? quite sad to spend alone. -
She said she's joining her gal-friends & none of them brought their husband along & so she doesn't wanna b the odd 1 out by bringing me along..
We've had talks after talks everytime we had a row after her nites' out.. She knows tat she wrong but she said she'll not stop as tis is her charactor n she'll not change..
Wat am I gonna do with her..? -
She mentioned tat other couples r doing the same thing & I shdn't b making a big fuss regarding tis issue..
When @ home, the only things tat we do 2gather is watching the TV & hving some meals 2 gather.. Her other time would b spent in front of her notebk busy with facebook & MSN..
Sometime when I'm really bored & lonely, tired of playing games, I'll go watch some movies by myself.. -
We used 2 hv a great time 2gather during our 1st 2 yrs.. We're practically inseparatable.. We even share the bathroom 2gather during showers everyday.. Now tat we drifting away from each other further everyday, IÂ’m afraid tat the inevitable outcome may come very soon..
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i feel sad for you TS.
You need to tell her that sacrifice is needed..
all the best to u TS -
Seriously, your wife is not a person who want to take your marriage to nex level..
Afraid of responsibility ? i mean everyday u go back home and talk 4 sentences a day !!??
Seriously , u ask urself are u really happy with this ? and what have she done to prove her love to you ? anything special bout how she treat u ?
No ? then u better divorce. i still think she still enjoy playing around. Shes still not mature to move to the nex level.. She still need to play. Honestly, do u really prefer this kind of gal as ur wife that will stay for a long time with u ?
U need to do something to save this marriage. Communicate more.. tell her what u think.. share everything in your mind with her.. let her know you're worried bout this and hope that u guys be much more better than previous . -
did you mean that she went to count down on new year eve (31 jan) and only went home at 10pm on 1 jan?Originally posted by thinking too much:I understand tat she might just wanna let her steam off after a day of work.. But its gettting more & more often.. The time she return also is getting longer.. The most recent trip is the count down.. I'm left alone @ home & she reach home the next day @ ard 10pm.. In the evening.. -
I always hate it when some1 say that their character will not change..its ok if she go clubbing 2/3 times a month but waht did she do when shes at home? spend time alone and ignoring her hubby ? this is just ridiculous.Originally posted by thinking too much:She said she's joining her gal-friends & none of them brought their husband along & so she doesn't wanna b the odd 1 out by bringing me along..
We've had talks after talks everytime we had a row after her nites' out.. She knows tat she wrong but she said she'll not stop as tis is her charactor n she'll not change..
Wat am I gonna do with her..?
why dont she change this habit and spend more time with you ? i really dun understand.. is clubbing more important than her love one ? Is this true love? TO leave your loved one alone and you go to enjoy urself ?
I cant accept this.. if i were u, i see no point of continuing this marriage.. marrige couple are suppossed to be happy.. not like this.. its not like this.
honestly, if she is my wife and behaving like this, i really do and will sacrifice her even if i really love her.. Love is not about everything.. Love is about both of u.. not only bcuz of her.. This is so one-sided way... -
i have a friend whose thai wife of 7 years also started clubbing and all that after she started to work. she never went home after 5 am though. Same thing. fights and all that. but she never stop going to clubs.
Later on, he found out that she had a man outside, now they are under going seperation. Guess what? they have a child and she is willing to give the child up to him to leave the marriage. -
Why ppl can be that irresponsible ? sigh..is the child is like a tool to simply give and take ? what would happen to the kid when he grow up knowing his mother is a farktard ??Originally posted by blu_sky:i have a friend whose thai wife of 7 years also started clubbing and all that after she started to work. she never went home after 5 am though. Same thing. fights and all that. but she never stop going to clubs.
Later on, he found out that she had a man outside, now they are under going seperation. Guess what? they have a child and she is willing to give the child up to him to leave the marriage.