I wanted to post this in Aunt Agony but decided this forum is more suitable.

Does marriage in this era offer any happiness for both the men and women of Singapore today? Especially, when the law in Singapore is not really fair for the men in terms of divorce settlement and considering that the divorce rate in Singapore is much higher than during our parents' generation?

Ultimately, it's the man that loses out in the long run. I have heard of cases of men marrying women only to find out that after divorce, he lost a lot of his money, along with the kids and half his monthly salary for the so-called "maintainence". Take note, the wife had an affair outside. And he still had to pay matainence. Whatever it is, it's the man who suffers. The average man suffers. Im speaking this from a guy's perspective. Is this the sexual equality we have hoped to achieve even though our manhood has been insulted?

Are people marrying for the sake of marriage or is marriage just an illusion just to conform to societal expectations? Why do people still marry?

doko

Its a paper world we live in.

Marriage certificates and prenupitals are the way to go

Well...

IMO is that this Suit AA more...

here people talk about happy things de! ^^

Originally posted by dokono:

I wanted to post this in Aunt Agony but decided this forum is more suitable.

Does marriage in this era offer any happiness for both the men and women of Singapore today? Especially, when the law in Singapore is not really fair for the men in terms of divorce settlement and considering that the divorce rate in Singapore is much higher than during our parents' generation?

Ultimately, it's the man that loses out in the long run. I have heard of cases of men marrying women only to find out that after divorce, he lost a lot of his money, along with the kids and half his monthly salary for the so-called "maintainence". Take note, the wife had an affair outside. And he still had to pay matainence. Whatever it is, it's the man who suffers. The average man suffers. Im speaking this from a guy's perspective. Is this the sexual equality we have hoped to achieve even though our manhood has been insulted?

Are people marrying for the sake of marriage or is marriage just an illusion just to conform to societal expectations? Why do people still marry?

doko

u think free sex comes cheap

Originally posted by Not4rent:

u think free sex comes cheap

is marriage about benefits?

Originally posted by popikachu:

free because u no need to pay as u use

but you got to pay in kind like clothes & diamonds

Originally posted by popikachu:

Well...

IMO is that this Suit AA more...

here people talk about happy things de! ^^

AA's topics can be very broad.

This forum is more specific for people looking for relationships.

And ultimately what they are looking for in a relationship?

doko

Originally posted by Not4rent:

u think free sex comes cheap

Sex is important but not the ultimate goal of marriage.

doko

Originally posted by dokono:

Sex is important but not the ultimate goal of marriage.

doko

then what is the "ultimate goal" of marriage ???

Originally posted by FireIce:

is marriage about benefits?

People come together because of what they can offer to each other isn't it? Not necessarily financial but emotional or physical assurances? Whatever it is, people come together because either party has something the other wants.

doko

Marriage shld come when there is love.

If you think about divorce liao, then no point talking about marriage.

When things happen in a marriage, both have to try to work it out. Divorce should not be the easy way out.

I feel tat alot of ppl are taking marriage way too lightly. It's no longer sacred and beautiful. But ugly and temporary.

Sad world we live in.

Originally posted by rathcycle:

then what is the "ultimate goal" of marriage ???

that, my friend, you have to ask yourself.

Everyone has different definitions of marriage. Some people want to settle down early while some people want to conform to societal expectations. Some people want to marry because they are smitten with each other.

Different people different thinking.

doko

haven't married think abt divorce liao... tis shows tat u SHOULD just stay in tis forum

Originally posted by tare:

haven't married think abt divorce liao... tis shows tat u SHOULD just stay in tis forum

you have to look at the things that can happen. unforseen circumstances can happen.

especially when you are a man? An average man earning average salary?

doko

Marriage is a prove of life time commitment….

Originally posted by tare:

haven't married think abt divorce liao... tis shows tat u SHOULD just stay in tis forum

this one called contigency plan, dun tell me wait till divorce then think meh? will be very luan then right?

1) I think in law, if the man is able to prove that his wife is having adultery in court, he does not need to pay the maintenance fee... Guess tat man does not has the evidence... Next time, find private detective lah...

2) It is fair to divide the man's asset to the wife if the wife is a housewife. But of coz, if u r rich b4 marriage, u can declare yr asset or prove tat those asset r not gain due to yr wife...

Anyway, no1 is going to get marry if they r thinking of divorcing soon excluding famous, super rich and extraordinary case... Usually, when couples get married, they have positive views and look forward to have positive future together...

For me, getting married, is enjoying life with liabilities in it...
But government sudsidizing on these liabilities lah... so ok lah

that’s why, better marry the right person. love is eternal? not so, not so.

Originally posted by dokono:

you have to look at the things that can happen. unforseen circumstances can happen.

especially when you are a man? An average man earning average salary?

doko

marriage is a commitment.. u work towards it, not thinking abt divorce or worse thinking there's a "safety net" a plan B ...

well i'm not a man...

An average man earning average salary

marriage? guess it's important as a career advancement...i got an ex-collegue who is single and another one who is married...both abt the same age. the single guy is far much more better in terms of work & knowledge but last yr the married guy got promoted as a section head coz the management see family man as more stable...

so end of story, i guess, marriage is important if u wanna climb up the coporate ladder...

Originally posted by urbanmonkey:

marriage? guess it's important as a career advancement...i got an ex-collegue who is single and another one who is married...both abt the same age. the single guy is far much more better in terms of work & knowledge but last yr the married guy got promoted as a section head coz the management see family man as more stable...

so end of story, i guess, marriage is important if u wanna climb up the coporate ladder...

hmmz that puts marraige in a whole new light.

but i really dun like how marriage terms are like set to kill the guy

Originally posted by urbanmonkey:

marriage? guess it's important as a career advancement...i got an ex-collegue who is single and another one who is married...both abt the same age. the single guy is far much more better in terms of work & knowledge but last yr the married guy got promoted as a section head coz the management see family man as more stable...

so end of story, i guess, marriage is important if u wanna climb up the coporate ladder...

ya... it is true also

the tragic flaw in your thinking…all bound by societal crap.

I think marriage is all about a piece of paper that a guy OWNs this woman..
So if she do something nasty, you are unhappy and divorced... kids go with you... then most important is that you want to raise the kids...

Now I think singaporean women are much stronger than men... We really lost out so much...