Originally posted by kilfer:I'll venture a guess.. the war between man and woman is due to unfulfilled desires/expectations.
Just give them the yandao/chiobu of their dreams, and I'm sure they'll be singing praises instead. Lolx.
Desires/expectations can never be fulfilled, that's how the gene pushes you to find better hosts/donors for the next generation.
Originally posted by Stevenson101:
Desires/expectations can never be fulfilled, that's how the gene pushes you to find better hosts/donors for the next generation.
does this mean if you married the girl of your dreams, you will still be looking for better girls?
Originally posted by kilfer:
does this mean if you married the girl of your dreams, you will still be looking for better girls?
Still be looking for better girls would be a matter of impulse control. I think your choice fo words is a little too crude to describe it.
But i'm sure there would be times where both parties would wonder if they could have done better.
Besides, we all know it's impossible to expect a girl/guy of your dreams. There's no way that other person would have no flaws whatsoever. Compromise is the only way for a healthy relationship, you're not ever going to be completely happy with every single behaviour.
Originally posted by Stevenson101:
Still be looking for better girls would be a matter of impulse control.But i'm sure there would be times where both parties would wonder if they could have done better.
Besides, we all know it's impossible to expect a girl/guy of your dreams. There's no way that other person would have no flaws whatsoever. Compromise is the only way for a healthy relationship, you're not ever going to be completely happy with every single behaviour.
I dun have much to add. My question is "will you stray if you are married?", and I agree with your answer. ![]()
Originally posted by Stevenson101:
Still be looking for better girls would be a matter of impulse control. I think your choice fo words is a little too crude to describe it.But i'm sure there would be times where both parties would wonder if they could have done better.
Besides, we all know it's impossible to expect a girl/guy of your dreams. There's no way that other person would have no flaws whatsoever. Compromise is the only way for a healthy relationship, you're not ever going to be completely happy with every single behaviour.
Ah... can't help to snipe me a little? "I think your choice fo words is a little too crude to describe it."
Which of my words are crude?
Originally posted by kilfer:
Ah... can't help to snipe me a little? "I think your choice fo words is a little too crude to describe it."Which of my words are crude?
I wouldn't call it sniping. Perhaps my choice of words was wrong, then i apologize.
But saying i'd still be looking for better girls just sounds a little off from what i'm trying to say.
Originally posted by Stevenson101:
I wouldn't call it sniping. Perhaps my choice of words was wrong, then i apologize.But saying i'd still be looking for better girls just sounds a little off from what i'm trying to say.
My apologies if I misinterpret what you're saying. ![]()
Originally posted by Stevenson101:
Not denying there isn't a point. But she is saying it in a fashion that leaves no room for interpretation.I would bet if she had a choice she wouldn't pick a poorer man as a boyfriend/husband. It's hypocritical to complain about the trait that would have been one of the top criterias for alot of women.
Wealth to me is not an issue.
But finding a man who won't eventually take all my efforts for granted is the difficult part.
What I see here.. is that when most marriage falls apart.. men claims they are bigger contributor because it's all based on dollar value and nothing else matters.
The whole marriage is weighted with money.
Based on the past postings , the men's conclusion of a marriage is ........
When the man earns more.. he deserves a bigger share. Woman earns more.. she don't deserve anything because she is already earning a lot. What the heck ?? Can you guys like.. make up your mind ?
Or is it that.. no matter what circumstances.. the wife just shouldn't be given more than a penny of what the man thinks she is worth ?
So, whatever man's excuses.. they all points to one thing.. self-preservation. But at what or who's cost ?
Richer or poorer.. does it change the mindset of a man ?
Money is but a tool.. to facilitate a smoother and easier life.. but it seems.. it is so important to man....that money becomes the source of their self esteem.. their male pride.
Originally posted by kilfer:I'll venture a guess.. the war between man and woman is due to unfulfilled desires/expectations.
Just give them the yandao/chiobu of their dreams, and I'm sure they'll be singing praises instead. Lolx.
They will sing praises.. until divorce do they part.
Originally posted by 787180:hei..hei U’re wasting time arguing with this jojobitch…a fanatic ,champion of woman’s rights or just argue for the sake of the female gender..boh liao..she is only bent on winning views offered not objective nor constructive..As for her co-partner,Vicious Kitty who try to win symapthy in this forum by feigning cervical cancer and posted a topic on her dying days….better dig the earth or prepare for her only demise..need any eulogies?
Mr.787180,
Do you understand the meaning of " High emotion, low intelligence." ?
You are really a nag leh. Keep repeating your postings for what ? There's no better arguments coming out from that puny male chauvinistic brain of yours.. I suggest you go to bed already. OK ? Good.
As for child custody. Men frequently cries foul about gender discrimination.
But if you look around you... do you see a MALE domestic helper in Singapore ?
If the males are just as good performing domestic chores and taking care of your children.. why ain't there a market for it ? Why arn't Singaporean employers asking for MALE domestic helpers ?
Our society is already gender discriminating.. and what the court does is merely a reflection of our culture and believes.
Originally posted by jojobeach:Wealth to me is not an issue.
But finding a man who won't eventually take all my efforts for granted is the difficult part.
What I see here.. is that when most marriage falls apart.. men claims they are bigger contributor because it's all based on dollar value and nothing else matters.
The whole marriage is weighted with money.
Based on the past postings , the men's conclusion of a marriage is ........
When the man earns more.. he deserves a bigger share. Woman earns more.. she don't deserve anything because she is already earning a lot. What the heck ?? Can you guys like.. make up your mind ?
Or is it that.. no matter what circumstances.. the wife just shouldn't be given more than a penny of what the man thinks she is worth ?
So, whatever man's excuses.. they all points to one thing.. self-preservation. But at what or who's cost ?
Richer or poorer.. does it change the mindset of a man ?
Money is but a tool.. to facilitate a smoother and easier life.. but it seems.. it is so important to man....that money becomes the source of their self esteem.. their male pride.
But it is to a lot of women. There's already been a bit of controversy on a variety show on Channel U where women are invited to share their views.
The ability of their male partners to provide rates very high on their piority list and it is still expected that the men earn more than the women. There is no fault in that, what's wrong with picking a partner who isn't a liability. Being practical in needs is still better than putting money on physical appearances.
My question to you would be this, where are you basing this conclusion on men off? Are you getting your opinion off the media or actual interaction with other married men and women?
There would be a difference, because there is no money in articles about happy marriages while magazines and newspapers would sell like hotcakes when there's a divorce scandal or alimony court case. Look at how popular tabloids news are, there's a huge demand for how ugly people can get. No one wants to know about happy marriages.
I think i have to know more before i can continue with this conversation because it seems your opinions are based on worst case scenarios, rather than a common trend.
However, money (or actually the power that it represents) gives men the confidence to approach women. Most men(working class men, teenagers think with the brain down south) would feel uncomfortable seeking a relationship if they are unable to support a relationship.
I'm sure you would not have found a man who stammers or not articulate with his words who do not display at least a substantial confidence in himself. At least not enough to seek a second date correct?
You say men needs money for self esteem, but it is exactly the self esteem that women mostly find attractive yes? And only men who pursue aggressively this self esteem would be most visible to women.
Originally posted by Stevenson101:But it is to a lot of women. There's already been a bit of controversy on a variety show on Channel U where women are invited to share their views.
The ability of their male partners to provide rates very high on their piority list and it is still expected that the men earn more than the women. There is no fault in that, what's wrong with picking a partner who isn't a liability. Being practical in needs is still better than putting money on physical appearances.
My question to you would be this, where are you basing this conclusion on men off? Are you getting your opinion off the media or actual interaction with other married men and women?
There would be a difference, because there is no money in articles about happy marriages while magazines and newspapers would sell like hotcakes when there's a divorce scandal or alimony court case. Look at how popular tabloids news are, there's a huge demand for how ugly people can get. No one wants to know about happy marriages.
I think i have to know more before i can continue with this conversation because it seems your opinions are based on worst case scenarios, rather than a common trend.
However, money (or actually the power that it represents) gives men the confidence to approach women. Most men(working class men, teenagers think with the brain down south) would feel uncomfortable seeking a relationship if they are unable to support a relationship.
I'm sure you would not have found a man who stammers or not articulate with his words who do not display at least a substantial confidence in himself. At least not enough to seek a second date correct?
You say men needs money for self esteem, but it is exactly the self esteem that women mostly find attractive yes? And only men who pursue aggressively this self esteem would be most visible to women.
Mr. Stevenson,
The ability to EARN more is not the same as the ability to TAKE from a failed marriage.
While a man earns his self-esteem from money he withheld from his ex-wife or children.. can that equate to self-esteem too ? Do you really think a woman will find such a man ATTRACTIVE ?
A man is only attractive.. when he can PROVIDE and CARE for a family.
If a woman sees a man abandoning his children and puts his ex-wife through hardship ( including costly divorce procedures)..So what if he is rich ...it is impossible to find that kind of man attractive at all.
As you can see here.. these men who posted on this thread .. complaining about the maintenance and how the ex-wife doesn't deserve a piece of the family pie.. or the custody to their own children... do you know how repulsive his behavior is to a woman ?
I cannot imagine if the charter never existed.. what kind of society will a woman be living in SG ? Unless she be forced into a marriage , which woman in her right mind will choose willingly to marry a SG man (without the charter to protect her rights )?
Bear in mind that the world is a smaller place now. Information flows freely around the world.
Women will rather marry into the country which provides the BEST and STRICTEST protection of woman's rights in family law.
The reason why SG women rarely marries Taiwanese men.. is because we know in Taiwan.. foreign brides gets to lose EVERYTHING..( Including their children).. in the event of a divorce.
But in the global stage. where does Singapore stands ?
If you think the depths of Woman's Charter and what it enables woman to protect.. does not has any impact on the quality of women willing to marry SG men. Think again.
Originally posted by BikerDog:Note that I have proof of all typed here, it's not just to bitch abt things, rather as a warning to guys here. Yes, I was stupid to get married at all, but heck - without this, the joy of a child cannot be discovered.
So if you wish to reply constructively, be prepared to show evidence.
It's better to remain silent, than to type nonsense and remove all doubts.
At the end of the day, it's not WHAT you achieve or obtain, it's HOW you did it. The fight each has is only between himself/herself - it was never the question of the other party. Do not worry about the lies built up against you - lies tend to build upon one another, and finally you will be able to show clearly the original root lie (doesn't matter from which party).
Always remember : If there are children, they are the most affected. You *adults* never seem to understand this. THINK of the children. You had your fun, now live with the joys of the child(ren). The females had their fun (and almost doing nothing - the guys works mostly) - so do not even try to say giving birth is SUCH a noble thing.
The family courts do not value the child as much as they value the maintenance and other matters. Live with it
cheers
do let me know if you need advice of an old ancient man
incl good lawyers
Just to prove it before you barks further,
Show us your marriage certificate, and show us your ex wife race and dialect group, and also show us your divorce certificate.
Finally show us why man should not marry a cantonese woman just because you married one that you cannot satisfy her enuf that she divorced with her, rite?
Yes, you shouldn't get married, it is a total waste of people time and effort when you married. However, those divorce lawyers are glad that you married, cos they know you dun last long, and that is where they earn their living.
Originally posted by Stevenson101:But it is to a lot of women. There's already been a bit of controversy on a variety show on Channel U where women are invited to share their views.
The ability of their male partners to provide rates very high on their piority list and it is still expected that the men earn more than the women. There is no fault in that, what's wrong with picking a partner who isn't a liability. Being practical in needs is still better than putting money on physical appearances.
My question to you would be this, where are you basing this conclusion on men off? Are you getting your opinion off the media or actual interaction with other married men and women?
There would be a difference, because there is no money in articles about happy marriages while magazines and newspapers would sell like hotcakes when there's a divorce scandal or alimony court case. Look at how popular tabloids news are, there's a huge demand for how ugly people can get. No one wants to know about happy marriages.
I think i have to know more before i can continue with this conversation because it seems your opinions are based on worst case scenarios, rather than a common trend.
However, money (or actually the power that it represents) gives men the confidence to approach women. Most men(working class men, teenagers think with the brain down south) would feel uncomfortable seeking a relationship if they are unable to support a relationship.
I'm sure you would not have found a man who stammers or not articulate with his words who do not display at least a substantial confidence in himself. At least not enough to seek a second date correct?
You say men needs money for self esteem, but it is exactly the self esteem that women mostly find attractive yes? And only men who pursue aggressively this self esteem would be most visible to women.
U channel??? OMG, i told our media are controlled, so do you think those wise nice ladies will speak their truth nothing but the true?? Think again hor, this aint Discovery Channel or the BBC.
Who said happy marriage dun get big news, look at Fann Wong, Tom Cruise and even slight news of Lau Uncle Andy lau marriage is big news. It is not only on the divorcing part only, of course as a news kaypoh media, what you expect them to print, nothing ar??? therefore it is not divorcing a matter of news, it is making news out of divorcing that is critical to their damn editors to approval it and paid them, the reporters well.
So, money is what makes a man more powerful to approach a woman, therefore the man got no other thing such as, characters, sex, attitude, manners, charm, gentlemanship etc etc to tackle a gal, only money ar?? that is absolutely wrong, and seen money is the motivation factor and the tools used for getting a woman, you cannot blame a woman asking for money as you made her love your money as per se.
Male ego and chauvinism is good if pursing a career but not in relationship, in relationship, you can never get what you wanted, and when you lost it, your ego start to betray you, leading you to anger, hot, depression and saddnesess. Your chauvinism will keep asking yourself, am i not handsome, am i not rich, am i not strong etc etc...but you will never ask, is my ego and chauvinsim of a male destroying me in relationship? Money is neccessary in life, but it does not represent everything, there are many things that money can never buy...and one of them is LOVE.
Originally posted by angel7030:
It is a demand and supply chain here, if the men dun demand for it, there will be no supply, peoples are cursing that Geyland or joo chiat should be hv so much pro gals, but then you should ask the question back and said, "if u guys dun come, these gals will automatically go back or vanish to some other places".Very business-like. And I believe that there is some truth in it. Given that it takes two hands to clap, it should be fair to assume the women have a need/demand for something too. I shall not discuss about the needs of a pro. Since i believe the original case was on extra-marital affairs with another woman. So would you kindly point out what do you think the girls in the extra-marital affairs demand.
Men courting women is the law of nature, if a women go and court men, i dun think you can call her a women, most of you call it slut or bitches. A women is like a flower, without the bees around, nothing moves.
Since law of nature probably means you perceive it as a divine right. I dont know about your experiences, but from my observations, girls nowadays have more initiative in starting a r/s. While i cant say for others, my friends and i certainly dont see them as sluts nor are they bitches.
(I see sluts as those girls who cant control their hormones and open themselves up to multiple men at the same time. Bitches are those who likes to test your tolerance threshold by doing unreasonable and/or detestable things.)
I bet you that every married man who are courting another woman would that they are not marry or simply that they are divorce or wife passed away. And when the woman fell in love with him, the true story will be poured out, cos married man are experienced man, they knows that women are emotional creature, once in love, he had them in his clutches. Damn men.
Maybe some, i doubt its every. How about their female counterparts? What would be their reasons in having another man?Amen
@BikerDog Proof is a very strong word. Probably most of us here are sharing our views and experiences on the issue. Maybe you would like to show us the proof. ( we cant experience everything. one case can hardly be "proof".)
Originally posted by jojobeach:And it all boils down to money. At the end of the day.. money is all that matters to a SG man. For money is the only thing they're left to fight for.. when everything else falls apart.
Money, assets and children. What else is there to fight for? Honour? Pride? Generally, I believe that men and women fight for the same things in a divorce case.
Originally posted by jojobeach:Wealth to me is not an issue.
But finding a man who won't eventually take all my efforts for granted is the difficult part.
I remember that one of my lecturers said that there was a study on what women desires in a relationship. Security ranked first and within it, financial security topped the table. (i have not personally seen the report nor am i able to google it. so yea)
What I see here.. is that when most marriage falls apart.. men claims they are bigger contributor because it's all based on dollar value and nothing else matters.
The whole marriage is weighted with money.
Money makes things possible. People are always giving credit to women for their roles in the family (be it they deserve it or not). What about the men? Nobody tells them "daddy, it sure is easy to read with this light". (based on the situation just above)
Based on the past postings , the men's conclusion of a marriage is ........
When the man earns more.. he deserves a bigger share. Woman earns more.. she don't deserve anything because she is already earning a lot. What the heck ?? Can you guys like.. make up your mind ?
Or is it that.. no matter what circumstances.. the wife just shouldn't be given more than a penny of what the man thinks she is worth ?
Hmm I dont see how you came up with that observation from the postings.
So, whatever man's excuses.. they all points to one thing.. self-preservation. But at what or who's cost ?
Richer or poorer.. does it change the mindset of a man ?
Money is but a tool.. to facilitate a smoother and easier life.. but it seems.. it is so important to man....that money becomes the source of their self esteem.. their male pride.
A woman is the same. Because they are fighting for the same thing. Please advise if i am mistaken.
Originally posted by jojobeach:As for child custody. Men frequently cries foul about gender discrimination.
But if you look around you... do you see a MALE domestic helper in Singapore ?
If the males are just as good performing domestic chores and taking care of your children.. why ain't there a market for it ? Why arn't Singaporean employers asking for MALE domestic helpers ?
Our society is already gender discriminating.. and what the court does is merely a reflection of our culture and believes.
Mens' preference of career should not be a factor for child custody. These issues should be tackled on a case-by-case basis. The society is already gender discriminating indeed, but the law should not encourage it. Since by right, everyone is equal before the law.
(Written laws are like spiders' webs; they will catch the weak and poor, but would be torn in pieces by the rich and powerful. Which might be true. But unless you are a proponent of applying laws by different standards, you probably wont want the law to discriminate)
Originally posted by Stevenson101:But it is to a lot of women. There's already been a bit of controversy on a variety show on Channel U where women are invited to share their views.
The ability of their male partners to provide rates very high on their piority list and it is still expected that the men earn more than the women. There is no fault in that, what's wrong with picking a partner who isn't a liability. Being practical in needs is still better than putting money on physical appearances.
Money always plays a part in any relationship, at least any serious relationships. Because your future, hopes, dreams, quality of life etc. all directly depends on it. It may or may not be the determinant of anything, but its definitely in the equation.
My question to you would be this, where are you basing this conclusion on men off? Are you getting your opinion off the media or actual interaction with other married men and women?
There would be a difference, because there is no money in articles about happy marriages while magazines and newspapers would sell like hotcakes when there's a divorce scandal or alimony court case. Look at how popular tabloids news are, there's a huge demand for how ugly people can get. No one wants to know about happy marriages.
I guess is that to be happy, you must actually have some money. Happy = got money = no money issues in articles.
I think i have to know more before i can continue with this conversation because it seems your opinions are based on worst case scenarios, rather than a common trend.
However, money (or actually the power that it represents) gives men the confidence to approach women. Most men(working class men, teenagers think with the brain down south) would feel uncomfortable seeking a relationship if they are unable to support a relationship.
I'm sure you would not have found a man who stammers or not articulate with his words who do not display at least a substantial confidence in himself. At least not enough to seek a second date correct?
You say men needs money for self esteem, but it is exactly the self esteem that women mostly find attractive yes? And only men who pursue aggressively this self esteem would be most visible to women.
Money is empowering. And it is a trait that women want in their men. They may not need to be forbes richests man, but must be able to sustain a certain quality of life. Other factors plays a part too, but money, be it you have it, or the ability to earn it, is and always will be a consideration
Originally posted by jojobeach:Mr. Stevenson,
The ability to EARN more is not the same as the ability to TAKE from a failed marriage.
Earning more suggests a higher contribution to the family in pure monetary terms, which can influence the claim on assets (ceteris paribus).
While a man earns his self-esteem from money he withheld from his ex-wife or children.. can that equate to self-esteem too ? Do you really think a woman will find such a man ATTRACTIVE ?
Since you termed it as "withheld", lets assume that the ex-wife is deserving of the alimony and the right to the custody of the children. I wont find him attractive too.
A man is only attractive.. when he can PROVIDE and CARE for a family.
Provide suggests that money does indeed play a part in the relationship (means wealth is important, be it assets owned or future earnings). But both the man and woman should care for the family.
If a woman sees a man abandoning his children and puts his ex-wife through hardship ( including costly divorce procedures)..So what if he is rich ...it is impossible to find that kind of man attractive at all.
If he is vengeful and actively seek to torment the wife, yes. I have heard from my mum about a friend of hers, on divorce, didnt want the child, stating that she doesnt want the child to "fang ai ta de xing fu". Girls can also abandon their children too. It is actually not impossible to find that kind of man attractive, If the girl places an exceeding emphasis on money.
As you can see here.. these men who posted on this thread .. complaining about the maintenance and how the ex-wife doesn't deserve a piece of the family pie.. or the custody to their own children... do you know how repulsive his behavior is to a woman ?
It is repulsive to some men too. I for one find it repulsive. The ex-wife might or might not deserve a piece of the family pie. She might deserve more of the pie. She might even deserve the whole pie. Same with the children. The thing is that it should be decided by virtue in a fair manner and the ex-wife should not be automatically given preference (ceteris paribus).
I cannot imagine if the charter never existed.. what kind of society will a woman be living in SG ? Unless she be forced into a marriage , which woman in her right mind will choose willingly to marry a SG man (without the charter to protect her rights )?
I cant remember anybody contesting the existence of the charter. I believe that vilifying men like this is not constructive. I believe that men and women both need to be protected.
Bear in mind that the world is a smaller place now. Information flows freely around the world.
I guess this is why we are here. sharing our ideas and experiences.
Women will rather marry into the country which provides the BEST and STRICTEST protection of woman's rights in family law.
Best and strictest sounds very cool. Everyone needs to be protected as much as possible.
The reason why SG women rarely marries Taiwanese men.. is because we know in Taiwan.. foreign brides gets to lose EVERYTHING..( Including their children).. in the event of a divorce.
But in the global stage. where does Singapore stands ?
If you think the depths of Woman's Charter and what it enables woman to protect.. does not has any impact on the quality of women willing to marry SG men. Think again.
Cant find how well protected women are as compared to the world. =X
Originally posted by angel7030:U channel??? OMG, i told our media are controlled, so do you think those wise nice ladies will speak their truth nothing but the true?? Think again hor, this aint Discovery Channel or the BBC.
I dont really see why they need to control the part about girls saying that money is indeed a factor in their search for a mate. It actually makes alot of sense to me. Since money plays a big part in almost all aspects of life. I am not talking about super rich, i am talking "must have enough money" (or the ability to earn or any combinations required to satisfy the woman.*edit*
encouraging men to work harder in order to earn more money would probably help drive the economy. maybe they did control afterall... (still believe that $ is impt)
Who said happy marriage dun get big news, look at Fann Wong, Tom Cruise and even slight news of Lau Uncle Andy lau marriage is big news. It is not only on the divorcing part only, of course as a news kaypoh media, what you expect them to print, nothing ar??? therefore it is not divorcing a matter of news, it is making news out of divorcing that is critical to their damn editors to approval it and paid them, the reporters well.
Dont know, not interested in celebrity news =X
So, money is what makes a man more powerful to approach a woman, therefore the man got no other thing such as, characters, sex, attitude, manners, charm, gentlemanship etc etc to tackle a gal, only money ar?? that is absolutely wrong, and seen money is the motivation factor and the tools used for getting a woman, you cannot blame a woman asking for money as you made her love your money as per se.
Money makes a man more confident in approaching a woman because he knows he has the ability to make a stable home for the woman and give her a certain standard of living. It supplements other characteristics. I find it normal. Why? because anybody serious about starting a family needs to have the means. The man and woman need to plan their futures together. I dont think many girls would want a guy who is handsome, gentlemanly, have great manners, exceedingly charming but is totally incapable of earning a penny as their spouse.
Male ego and chauvinism is good if pursing a career but not in relationship, in relationship, you can never get what you wanted, and when you lost it, your ego start to betray you, leading you to anger, hot, depression and saddnesess.
More people are flattered into virtue than bullied out of vice. Males and females are the same, hitting out at the opposite gender for nothing only serves to raise the hostility level.
Your chauvinism will keep asking yourself, am i not handsome, am i not rich, am i not strong etc etc...but you will never ask, is my ego and chauvinsim of a male destroying me in relationship?
I believe that everything plays a part in the choice of a spouse. Looks, money, intellect, health, humour, etc. etc. Different people will place different emphasis on different qualities but ALL of them will be worth at least some points.
Money is neccessary in life, but it does not represent everything, there are many things that money can never buy...and one of them is LOVE.
Agreed with everything except the idea of love. Since most of the people i know, guys and girls, even those who always have love on their lips, cannot define love. Some people might say love cannot be defined. But from my observations, the usual indicators of love usually has the self at its core. Gifts, attention, anything. It seems more like self-love to me. You can do things for others, but it is probably you want him/her to be happy because you dont want him/her to leave you. Just like adam smith's theory on the pursuit of self-love(you) by an individual also serves the interest of his/her bethren(your significant other).
There is really an unimbalance, imperfection and plenty of shortfalls to be seen in the present Women's Charter here. Society has changed and roles between the two sexes have changed and many women now has played a domineering role especially in Singapore. Although I am a women, but I don't side the women coz i have seen a lot of things happening and the law has been over protective against the men here. I have seen many abuses down here, whether be it from career minded married women or prc women, some have ruined families and used the Women's Charter to abuse their power, covered under the umbrella of women's charter, they can issue threats to the husband and yet be protected, call for protection orders even though they themselves are the offensive ones. There is really something that need to be changed right now! or else no man will want Singapore ladies! !
why does the name sounds familiar? Wait, is this Aarron Stevenson?
Originally posted by Lyn2010:There is really an unimbalance, imperfection and plenty of shortfalls to be seen in the present Women's Charter here. Society has changed and roles between the two sexes have changed and many women now has played a domineering role especially in Singapore. Although I am a women, but I don't side the women coz i have seen a lot of things happening and the law has been over protective against the men here. I have seen many abuses down here, whether be it from career minded married women or prc women, some have ruined families and used the Women's Charter to abuse their power, covered under the umbrella of women's charter, they can issue threats to the husband and yet be protected, call for protection orders even though they themselves are the offensive ones. There is really something that need to be changed right now! or else no man will want Singapore ladies! !
Dude.. pretending to be a woman does not make you sound more credible.. HAHHAHAHHHAH....
Mr Ahbeo, the phrase ceteri paribus.. is not appropriate. Please stop pimping it.
Originally posted by jojobeach:Mr. Stevenson,
The ability to EARN more is not the same as the ability to TAKE from a failed marriage.
While a man earns his self-esteem from money he withheld from his ex-wife or children.. can that equate to self-esteem too ? Do you really think a woman will find such a man ATTRACTIVE ?
A man is only attractive.. when he can PROVIDE and CARE for a family.
If a woman sees a man abandoning his children and puts his ex-wife through hardship ( including costly divorce procedures)..So what if he is rich ...it is impossible to find that kind of man attractive at all.
As you can see here.. these men who posted on this thread .. complaining about the maintenance and how the ex-wife doesn't deserve a piece of the family pie.. or the custody to their own children... do you know how repulsive his behavior is to a woman ?
I cannot imagine if the charter never existed.. what kind of society will a woman be living in SG ? Unless she be forced into a marriage , which woman in her right mind will choose willingly to marry a SG man (without the charter to protect her rights )?
Bear in mind that the world is a smaller place now. Information flows freely around the world.
Women will rather marry into the country which provides the BEST and STRICTEST protection of woman's rights in family law.
The reason why SG women rarely marries Taiwanese men.. is because we know in Taiwan.. foreign brides gets to lose EVERYTHING..( Including their children).. in the event of a divorce.
But in the global stage. where does Singapore stands ?
If you think the depths of Woman's Charter and what it enables woman to protect.. does not has any impact on the quality of women willing to marry SG men. Think again.
Note that the wife in question may be in the wrong too.
Originally posted by jojobeach:Dude.. pretending to be a woman does not make you sound more credible.. HAHHAHAHHHAH....
Mr Ahbeo, the phrase ceteri paribus.. is not appropriate. Please stop pimping it.
Earning more suggests a higher contribution to the family in pure monetary terms, which can influence the claim on assets (ceteris paribus).
It is repulsive to some men too. I for one find it repulsive. The ex-wife might or might not deserve a piece of the family pie. She might deserve more of the pie. She might even deserve the whole pie. Same with the children. The thing is that it should be decided by virtue in a fair manner and the ex-wife should not be automatically given preference (ceteris paribus).
ceteris paribus means "all others things being equal". which after rereading the post is indeed alittle redundant. My apologies noble lady.
http://www.asiaone.com/News/AsiaOne%2BNews/Singapore/Story/A1Story20090411-134710.html
Half-blind man nearly lost everything to China bride
Sat, Apr 11, 2009
First, she threatened to get the police to arrest him if he refused to marry her. When he finally relented, she made him sign a document willing his home and all his assets to her.
Mr Liang, 62, who is blind in one eye, told a Shin Min Daily News reporter that he first met the China woman at a coffee shop near his home in 2004. His wife had passed away ten years earlier in 1994.
He said that she came up to him and introduced herself as a beautician from China and said that she wanted to be his friend.
The woman, who is 11 years younger than Mr Liang, told him that she was a divorcee, and that her ex-husband and daughter are in China.
Mr Liang said that the woman was very nice to him when they first met. However, things took a drastic change three months later.
"She told me that she wanted me to marry her. Should I refuse, she would report me to the police, accusing me of treating her badly and cheating her of her feelings."
As he had no knowledge about the penal code, Mr Liang took the China woman's threats for real and agreed to the marriage. He also listened to her instructions, asking him to keep his children in the dark about the nuptials.
"It was only at the Registry of Marriages did I realize that we needed two witnesses." Mr Liang told Shin Min, "I called my daughter, telling her I needed her as my witness, but she refused."
In the end, Mr Liang managed to get a male relative and a friend of the China woman's to witness their marriage registration.
It was only months later that Mr Liang's children learned of their father's marriage.
Despite acceding to her request, Mr Liang found that married life was no better. His new wife refused to work, and constantly asked him for money.
When his salary as a cleaner failed to satisfy his wife's needs, Mr Liang found himself asking his daughter for money.
The former cleaner also blamed his new wife for his partial loss of sight. Mr Liang said that he was suffering from glaucoma and cataracts, but his condition was in check as his daughter would take him to the doctor regularly.
When he remarried, his China wife assumed the responsibility, but failed to bring Mr Liang for treatment after the first time. By 2008, Mr Liang lost all sight in his right eye and was unable to work.
According to a doctor's report, Mr Liang's loss of sight was attributed to the neglect of his condition.
In early 2007, Mr Liang's new wife forced him to sign a document written in English. When Mr Liang indicated that he did not understand its contents, she refused to translate it for him.
When he brought it to a neighbour, Mr Liang was horrified to learn that it was an agreement stating that he had willed his $300,000 three-room flat as well as his CPF and bank savings to her.
However, as Mr Liang's children were aware of the agreement, the China woman did not benefit from it during the divorce proceedings.
the above article is just for reference.
it's not only women that needs protection. ![]()
Originally posted by kilfer:the above article is just for reference.
it's not only women that needs protection.
Note the article mentioned... the China wife did NOT benefit from the divorce. What other protection are you expecting from this case ? You want the china woman to go to jail or pay damages ?
How many cases of domestic violence do you know whereby the MAN who abuses his wife goes to jail or pay damages to his wife ?
The family court is NOT a criminal court. A family court cannot send a person to jail.
Please educate yourself about the different types of court houses.
Originally posted by Herzog_Zwei:Note that the wife in question may be in the wrong too.
First of all... do understand that the family court's purpose is not to determine who is in the fault or the bigger culprit and to award damages. The purpose of the family court is NOT to punish.