Tenacity
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Please pardon my english. hahaha..
When closing a deal, 20% of the time is the customers who close it, and the other 20% is the salesperson who close it. so what about the remaining 60%? 60% of the time, the deal has never been closed because there wasn't any attempt to do so.
so why is this so?? there are 2 main factors. 1st is because of guilt. the salesperson himself/herself know that the product isnt as good as being promoted, and at the point of closing the deal, he/she decided not to do so. 2ndly, it's because of fear of rejection. the salesperson is afraid of being rejected, and therefore decided to reject himself/herself by not attempting to clinch the deal.
rejection, it's commonly seen in reality. it's not just about closing a business deal. lecturer cited an example how he was being rejected by a girl he liked when he was secondary 4. the reason why the rejection took place is not because of him, but the girl had a boyfriend already.
then he went on, explaining "tenacity". he had this friend, XX, who likes this girl, and wanted to ask her out. he asked her out for a simple meal for the 1st time, but was rejected.. and was continuosly rejected after many many attempts. so XX approached lecturer and asked him how. The latter simply told him, "try again lor". and his friend really heeded his advice, and tried again.. after many many many many attempts, the girl eventually agreed to go on a date with him. then the girl finally fell in love with him after a few dates, and so they went on steady... one day, the girl met a rich suave-looking in her university, and fell in love with him (the suave + rich guy). so she initiated a break-up. but XX didnt want to because he loved her deeply.. so he kept asking, persuading.. and did all kind of things, hoping that she will come back to him one day. but she didnt.
XX again approached lecturer for help. lecturer told him once more, "try again lor". and XX really did try again. after many attempts once more.. blah blah... they patched up.. and right now they are happily married, with 3 children.
and that's tenacity. 40% of the sales people gave up after their first attempt.. (so much statistics.. don't quite rem). so in general 96% of the sales people gave up after their 4th attempt. the remaining 4% succeeded on their 5th attempts despite being rejected for the first 4 times.
haha.. so understand what's tenacity now? =P -
have u heard of the story of the fly that tries to get out of the closed window?
the fly keeps flying and knocking itself onto the window pane, in hope dat it will open and it will be able to get out. it din open but still it believes if itkeeps on trying, it will be able to get out one day. In the end, the fly died because it keeps knocking himself to the window pane.
of cos, must keep on trying...but must be rational la. if try too many times, must know how to let go and give up? so that you can finally accept the fact and move on another direction...
i.c.y -
Tenacity ... i know what it means:
Keep on trying and trying, until the other person gets fed up of you and agrees
But generally, this reeks of a 'never give up' attitude. Many successes in life has been created because of this, and i agree that this is a good characteristic to have.
But like what Icy Jie has stated... you keep on banging the same window, you end up killing yourself. Why not see if the other windows are open instead?
Generally it applies to relationships as well. Keep on trying to woo a girl, but girl rejects you. There are only 2 options: 1) Continue to pester her. 2) Give up and look for another.
Sometimes, infact, many times. I've heard of my friends being continuously pestered by people who don't give up. While this may be a good thing in business relationships, i believe it can get kind of irritating when you cannot seem to ditch a guy you have no interest with.
Hence everytime a relationship problem surfaces in AA, we have generally 2 responses, continue in the relationship, or give up and look for another.
Of course i think which stage of the relationship, future of it is important when considering which option to take... but then i just realised i'm rambling, and i don't know where i'm headed. Sigh, tired today. But yea, i guess i made my point. (i think). -
.. double ...~
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I tried and tried for more than one year...
but I never regret moving on...
cos I think it saved me from feeling a lot of pain...
i.c.y -
Yea. always set a time limit for things, even with goals. When it takes too long or seems impossible for a certain goal, move on. Just realise that the world is constantly changing and moving while you continue to pursue that goal of yours... ~Originally posted by icyprincess:I tried and tried for more than one year...
but I never regret moving on...
cos I think it saved me from feeling a lot of pain...
i.c.y -
yea...esp when there is another open door in sight...Originally posted by _Aaron_:Yea. always set a time limit for things, even with goals. When it takes too long or seems impossible for a certain goal, move on. Just realise that the world is constantly changing and moving while you continue to pursue that goal of yours... ~
so thought why not go for it and see where it will lead to?
i.c.y -
EXPLAINS 'BUGGER'?
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lol i realised that... if you win in the end, people will call it tenacity and perserverance.
and if you don't, people will call it stupidity and stubbornness -
but anyway, how many of you here are willing to.... be tenacious in a relationship that isn't working out?
say a one way love cycle, you like him/her but it isn't returned, he/she is already attached. are you going to try to butt your head into his/her heart?
i mean, personally, i would fear rejection and being tedious towards the opposite party (which would affect our friendship, so we cant 'just be friends')
any thoughts? -
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+1 and you can kill yourself with both!!Originally posted by happygoluckyy:lol i realised that... if you win in the end, people will call it tenacity and perserverance.
and if you don't, people will call it stupidity and stubbornness -
hmm..
hehe.. -
I think if I really love a person, I will care about his feelings...so if it is no longer possible between us, I will choose to let go and wish him happiness.
i.c.y -
But when u know enough is enough?Originally posted by icyprincess:have u heard of the story of the fly that tries to get out of the closed window?
the fly keeps flying and knocking itself onto the window pane, in hope dat it will open and it will be able to get out. it din open but still it believes if itkeeps on trying, it will be able to get out one day. In the end, the fly died because it keeps knocking himself to the window pane.
of cos, must keep on trying...but must be rational la. if try too many times, must know how to let go and give up? so that you can finally accept the fact and move on another direction...
i.c.y -
Sometimes, you just wake up, tired, and you realise.Originally posted by A Beautiful Mind:But when u know enough is enough?
"I had enough! Its time to move on"
That's when you know enough is enough
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when you have done as much as you could and the other person doesnt seem to appreciate it.Originally posted by A Beautiful Mind:But when u know enough is enough?
i.c.y -
but i guess relationships is kind of.... hit and miss kind of thing right? a person could... walk into a coffeeshop and meet the girl of his dreams, another can spend 10 years dating and going to parties without finding his dream person.
anyway, i like aaron's definition of "enough" -
Its called Fate, Kismet, Luck, Destiny.. whatever you want to call it. But some people prefer to do something, then to wait, hence we have the guy who spend 10 years dating and going to parties, compared to the other guy.Originally posted by happygoluckyy:but i guess relationships is kind of.... hit and miss kind of thing right? a person could... walk into a coffeeshop and meet the girl of his dreams, another can spend 10 years dating and going to parties without finding his dream person.
anyway, i like aaron's definition of "enough"
Eh, many times i wake up and realise "This has got to stop.", and i stop. Works well for me =) -
I wish I can stop when I tell myself to. Usually it will take some time before I can totally stop.Originally posted by _Aaron_:Its called Fate, Kismet, Luck, Destiny.. whatever you want to call it. But some people prefer to do something, then to wait, hence we have the guy who spend 10 years dating and going to parties, compared to the other guy.
Eh, many times i wake up and realise "This has got to stop.", and i stop. Works well for me =)
i.c.y -
I am usually aware of the problem, and i procrastinate, or am unmotivated to do anything about it, until one day i just know that i Must do something... maybe my subconscious mind keep on nagging me til i had enough..Originally posted by icyprincess:I wish I can stop when I tell myself to. Usually it will take some time before I can totally stop.
i.c.y
It is then i do something about it. I take some time too... i think its human nature to procrastinate actually...
no flamm pls -
I let mine to drag on for longer than I would like. It took me nearly 2 years before I can finally admit to myself that yes, I am over him.Originally posted by _Aaron_:I am usually aware of the problem, and i procrastinate, or am unmotivated to do anything about it, until one day i just know that i Must do something... maybe my subconscious mind keep on nagging me til i had enough..
It is then i do something about it. I take some time too... i think its human nature to procrastinate actually...
no flamm pls
That's why I am still a bit traumatized. It is scary that an unrequited love can last that long.
i.c.y -
hmm, i just blanked out here for a while.Originally posted by icyprincess:I let mine to drag on for longer than I would like. It took me nearly 2 years before I can finally admit to myself that yes, I am over him.
That's why I am still a bit traumatized. It is scary that an unrequited love can last that long.
i.c.y
urm. Still blanked out.
Scary perhaps, but lets learn from our mistakes and move on..