Frustrated with dad.....!

• forum_man

  14 Dec 04, 05:56

  Haiz it seems like all my friends' dad are good father and husband, but how come my dad is like so useless...Well he was unfaithful to my mum and basically wrecked our family....now that he is penniless, he always stay at home and do nothing but mess up the place....sometimes i really wonder how come i have such a useless dad...
  
  Beoz of his unfaithfulness, the relationship between me and my sibling and my mum distanced....sometimes really hated him, everytime saw him feel more hatred....anyone can advise on my situation
• the.raven

  14 Dec 04, 06:33

  Originally posted by forum_man:

  Haiz it seems like all my friends' dad are good father and husband, but how come my dad is like so useless...Well he was unfaithful to my mum and basically wrecked our family....now that he is penniless, he always stay at home and do nothing but mess up the place....sometimes i really wonder how come i have such a useless dad...
  
  Beoz of his unfaithfulness, the relationship between me and my sibling and my mum distanced....sometimes really hated him, everytime saw him feel more hatred....anyone can advise on my situation

  then round up your siblings, one day beat him up
• fymk

  14 Dec 04, 08:25

  Be the man your dad wasn't.
  This will be the best gift you will give to your future wife and others
• sgboy2004

  14 Dec 04, 08:26

  hmmm... mi daddy is gone...
• CyanSupra

  14 Dec 04, 08:34

  
• _Aaron_

  14 Dec 04, 08:58

  Originally posted by forum_man:

  Haiz it seems like all my friends' dad are good father and husband, but how come my dad is like so useless...Well he was unfaithful to my mum and basically wrecked our family....now that he is penniless, he always stay at home and do nothing but mess up the place....sometimes i really wonder how come i have such a useless dad...
  
  Beoz of his unfaithfulness, the relationship between me and my sibling and my mum distanced....sometimes really hated him, everytime saw him feel more hatred....anyone can advise on my situation

  I have a friend who's like that as well. But what can we do?
  If you're spiritual, then pray.
  If you're not, all you can do, is use him as a model. A model of someone whom you do NOT want to be when you grow up.
  
  I'm doing the same thing, though my dad isn't really that bad, he has a lot of character flaws that i'm adapting to as i grow up, growing up to be the exact opposite of him.
  
  I guess that's the only thing we can do. Of course, you could try talking to him, but i'm not placing any high hopes there. You could get your grand parents to talk to him as well, to try and whack some senses into him.
  
  But this is a gray area that i don't quite know as well, maybe can wait for Yunhaier or someone else who knows to post..
• CryoLind

  14 Dec 04, 09:05

  someone once asked me, 'who u dislike more, ur dad or mum?' And whoever i answer, he told me, 'that is d person u r more likely to be'
  
  Actually when we are veri much d same as d person that we dislike. So, try not to be d same as him.
• alien_04

  14 Dec 04, 10:30

  Originally posted by forum_man:

  Haiz it seems like all my friends' dad are good father and husband, but how come my dad is like so useless...Well he was unfaithful to my mum and basically wrecked our family....now that he is penniless, he always stay at home and do nothing but mess up the place....sometimes i really wonder how come i have such a useless dad...
  
  Beoz of his unfaithfulness, the relationship between me and my sibling and my mum distanced....sometimes really hated him, everytime saw him feel more hatred....anyone can advise on my situation

  Well, don't worry you are not alone. Just that you haven't met a worst case
  than yours. If you have a religion, start praying and try to re-unite
  and strengthen the family bond. Talk and discuss with your siblings that
  you wanted a change, be it in the bahaviour of your dad or your
  relationship with your siblings, and work towards it. If your dad is
  succumbed to the evil path, at least the rest of the family are still intact
  and try to help him out of it. The process may be slow but if you are determined nothing can stop you.
  
• chaykwaytiao

  14 Dec 04, 11:51

  agreed with fymk.. be a better dad.
  
  I believe there are similar cases in some of us and I am one of them, before I could improve my family problems, my dad passed away a few months ago recently due to heart attack.
  That anger , that hate, that sorrow... just faded away.
  How much I hate my father at that time, has become regret now.Regret of not doing enuff . I know how much my father love me.. just that he didnt know how to love me and his family. I still love my dad.
  
  
• chaykwaytiao

  14 Dec 04, 11:58

  although there is peace now in our family without my dad, there is always a sense of missing him forever.
  
  If you have a happy family, do treasure.
  
  
• gerrykoh

  14 Dec 04, 16:00

  Learn to be a good father so yr kids won't suffer like u do.
• hopy

  14 Dec 04, 21:52

  me also hving probs w/ my dad.. haiz.. really at a lost at wat to do...
• bismarck

  14 Dec 04, 21:54

  i dunno waht to make of him
• ben8

  15 Dec 04, 12:41

  juz come out and work, and support yrself... i guess gettin a $1.5K is nt tat diffcult.... =D dun keep on askin family to support you, unless u frm a rich family lah....
  
  but i work till now since i am sec 2... =) and nxt yr is NS T.T