i did not break up with her; she did. i know it's a petty argument; that's why i didn't understand it. i don't think the actions that she took justified this silly argument. she told me herself she didn't want anything more to do with me.Originally posted by SunRisE:don't really quite understand your story.. but somehow this sounds familiar to me..
Well.. i did break up with one of my very good friends about 3½ years back.. Due to some problems.. and i got really no choice but jus to end it.. I know it hurts.. but then again.. i know this will eventually heal.. i had my reasons.. she had hers.. No matter how much i explained or she explained.. none will hear each other out.. Reasoning is a very tiring matter.. eventually i stop..
Not receiving her calls and sms.. i guess is time to stop all these nonsense and reasoning we had.. As time goes by.. After few years.. she got her life back.. getting on quite well.. as i happen to see her on streets sometimes..
Though we are not that close friends anymore.. but all those unhappy things had been washed away.. No matter what she's still someone i known for years.. and be friend with.. She's still my friend though.. At least i smiled and say hi when i see her on street.. She does that too..
Time will heal.. even if you had a argument with your friends today.. soon after you both are still friends.. maybe not that close as ever.. but you didn't lose one good friend..Don't be too despair.. Let your friend cool down.. Time passes.. she will forgive and probably contact you again after sometimes.. Don't worry ya..
Cheers..![]()
To start. How old are you?Originally posted by wallie:So, no one wants to provide any advice?![]()
in that case.. so be it.. If she's determined to do it.. no matter how much you say.. is still not going to change her mind..Originally posted by wallie:i did not break up with her; she did. i know it's a petty argument; that's why i didn't understand it. i don't think the actions that she took justified this silly argument. she told me herself she didn't want anything more to do with me.
Early 20s?Originally posted by wallie:and i am in my 20s.
it takes not only a few months.. jus get on with your life.. and don't bother liao.. soon after you both willbe friends again.. if you keep pestering her about this matter.. she get even pissed.. eventually she won't even want to be friends with you again!Originally posted by wallie:oh yes, by the way this incident happened last april.. since then she has refused to talk to me properly about it.
Have MORE CONFIDENCE in YOURSELF. BUILD up NEW FRIENDS and SOCIAL CIRCLE(S).Originally posted by A Beautiful Mind:i cld understand tis feeling, cause i went thru a bizzare & troubling situation with my ex-best fren... somethk which still gets me at times.
We knew in Pri 6, were best of fren thru out secondary sch. He was the kind of fren whom i felt--- the entire world cld abandoned me, but at least i will have him by my side. We cld spent like the entire weekends together, jus a call in the middle of the nite & he will pop over my plc.
During my enlistment into the army, i went into relationships probs. It was at this time that we began to drift apart. I called him several times but he slowly made it known to me that we cld never be like in the past..
At the time when i needed him most, i felt immensely dejected that he had to "abandoned" me in this manner...
There were no quarrels, but his seemingly "indifference" was what made the situation seemed cruel..
Till today, 3 years later, i am still puzzled by what caused us to break up as best frens. Somehow, the emotional scars caused by this incident was greater than any breakup with my girlfrens.
I knew relationships at our young age tend to be instable, but i always tod our friendship cld be more permanent. i desperately needed a "closure" to this incident, to put the past behind me & move on. Maybe caused i am a weak willed, emotional wimp... this incident still gets me from time to time.
The frens i have now are incredibly few. Because of this incident & another concerning a gal that i love most, i developed a notion that: I am a fundementally flawed. I dun know whats the prob, but i jus get this feeling that ppl will avoid me once they know me well??
I am immensely afriad of such sitiations recurring... my only coping strategy is to keep most friendships brief, i have no probs working with ppl in sch at projects & stuff, but i know i its quite hard to get a close fren anymore..
Sometimes, i jus kinda of hate myself. The kind of concern, initatives & interactions i see so common in most relationships is so elusive to me. It's pretty easy for me to be a loner... most of my frens nv contact me anymore, i'm so tired of taking that "initative" & then being forgotten soon after. Its like almost nothing i do, will leave a impression in most ppl...
what a cursed existence...
Growing.Originally posted by Yunhaier:Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
We all have many friends in our life.
Those who have relatively huge social circle should understand that most are un-keep-able as time advances.
We do what we can to upkeep those that make meaning to our lives.
Friends
The good ones stands on YOUR side and move with your personal growth.
The fcuked-up ones move against it; your growth.
Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
All must take place if you desire growth.
Good friends don't impede your growth; false ones does.
False ones doesn't know they aint real.
In fact, it's our mind that splits illusionary from reality.
Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
Our causal recognition is but only a facade.
A mask from within; we will never return to a party with our old identity intact.
We gain new identity.
When we sacrifice,
Evolution take places
And changes sinks in.
Cheers
Hmmm... kinda of understand bits & pieces.Originally posted by Yunhaier:Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
We all have many friends in our life.
Those who have relatively huge social circle should understand that most are un-keep-able as time advances.
We do what we can to upkeep those that make meaning to our lives.
Friends
The good ones stands on YOUR side and move with your personal growth.
The fcuked-up ones move against it; your growth.
Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
All must take place if you desire growth.
Good friends don't impede your growth; false ones does.
False ones doesn't know they aint real.
In fact, it's our mind that splits illusionary from reality.
Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
Our causal recognition is but only a facade.
A mask from within; we will never return to a party with our old identity intact.
We gain new identity.
When we sacrifice,
Evolution take places
And changes sinks in.
Cheers
Hmmm... kinda of understand bits & pieces.Originally posted by Yunhaier:Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
We all have many friends in our life.
Those who have relatively huge social circle should understand that most are un-keep-able as time advances.
We do what we can to upkeep those that make meaning to our lives.
Friends
The good ones stands on YOUR side and move with your personal growth.
The fcuked-up ones move against it; your growth.
Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
All must take place if you desire growth.
Good friends don't impede your growth; false ones does.
False ones doesn't know they aint real.
In fact, it's our mind that splits illusionary from reality.
Sacrificial
Evolution
Changes
Our causal recognition is but only a facade.
A mask from within; we will never return to a party with our old identity intact.
We gain new identity.
When we sacrifice,
Evolution take places
And changes sinks in.
Cheers