What Have I Done? How Would People Judge Me ?
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First Of All , Thanks To People showing Interest in this topic .. I like to get started by telling about my relationship with a girl .. She was younger than me by two years and we were in the same CCA .. one fine day after cca event , i got a chance to talk to her (junior) .. back then i didn't really know her , just found her cute .. she was waiting at the bus stop for her parents , the rest went to have dinner .. to my own surprise .. i got this compulsion to stay instead ... waited with her ... it was around 9-10 p.m ( public performance then) i guess i was infatuated .. she seemed so perfect .. i had a lot of concidence with her .. too numerous to quote .. it was september last year .. i got her number and contacted her ... over the weekend , i jumped into a silly mess by asking her to be my gf .. back then i was silly .. can't blame .. she thought over the weekend .. agreed on monday .. ever since i would be with her after cca , send her back whenever i could .. but she had a best friend who sort of liked me before .. rumors were that she made my gf agreed to get back at me .. my gf was easily influenced .. throughout three months i was only with her during dawn and dusk .. came to school with her during holidays for cca .. and send her back ... we didn't went out once on a serious date ... the next thing that happened stirred up everything .. her cousin (one years older than her) objected to her having a relationship for she thinks that my gf is too young ... from then on .. we drifted apart .. first i couldn't talk to her in school , couldn't sent her back , can't wait at te bus stop for her ... my gf was afraid that someone sees .. eventually her phone was taken by her parents as they were expecting more from her results .. then i couldn't call .. couldn't message .. but i still kept on waiting .. believing that we would continue .. her best friend continue to avoid me .. dragging my gf along . i had practically no contact with her till she got her phone back .. we managed to message .. however her tone was that as if we broke up already .. i managed to make her feel comfortable with the waiting .. she said that i should find somebody more worthy of my love .. (addition , she told me months ago about something bad that happened to her in the past .. i accepted her still ..) .. just when it's possible that we would get back together again .. she gave me a message saying that she hates me , wanting to return my things .. she reject all my calls and didn't reply my messages .. i waited for things to cool .. called her sister .. who said that i should wait .. lots of my friends thinks that it's her best friend that influenced her decision .. in fact .. one of my friend quoted that my physical gf was indeed her but mentally is her best friend .. i got lots of advice .. saying that she would believe in her friends more , and prefer their company .. well .. all this while i accepted it .. on valentines' day .. i gave her a present which was .. expensive to a certain extent .. she didn't want to accept .. now she gave me back everything .. i' wondering whether i should continue to wait for something to happen or for time to pass then talk to her .. her best friend is forever in the way .. perhaps all hope is lost ... sorry for the long message .. thanks for listening .. feel free to comment
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If u think she is worth ur time and you truly love her then wait.
But reading from what u have posted,I think ur efforts will be futile. -
Well ... perhaps we are young ... Waiting for her is painful .. Waiting Hurts , without knowing how she is .. perhaps i'm blind .. maybe i'm too good to her .. she says i am too good to her .. my friends know too .. i'm sixteen this years .. she wasn't a distraction to my studies .. i scored better with her as motivation ... but now .. i'm not sure what to do .. she told me not to wait .. she was afraid that by the end of these years , she might not like me anymore .. for your infomation .. she was my first gf ..
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Get over the pain and move on.
Its painful,it gonna hurt,U might not be able to take it,It takes time.
It might be easy to say but difficult to do.
For me,I haven moved on yet. -
Like you, I have my BGR when I am very young. I have several relationships that don't last long. Let go of your infatuations.
You would find that as time pass by things would be better. Time can heal wounds.
If you really love her, then wait for her. Just be a friend to her. Remain in contact as days go and perharps in future, this would spin a long lasting relationship.
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Hmm...what you can do right now is to be her frd...but you can still give her the concern of a bf. No phyiscal contacts like a bf though.Originally posted by SilverRevo:Well ... perhaps we are young ... Waiting for her is painful .. Waiting Hurts , without knowing how she is .. perhaps i'm blind .. maybe i'm too good to her .. she says i am too good to her .. my friends know too .. i'm sixteen this years .. she wasn't a distraction to my studies .. i scored better with her as motivation ... but now .. i'm not sure what to do .. she told me not to wait .. she was afraid that by the end of these years , she might not like me anymore .. for your infomation .. she was my first gf ..
Forget about spending money on expensive stuffs...it's the thought that counts.
I could read that you like her alot, so I'm not going to ask you to give up on her. Instead, I would like you to see situations from her angle. Put yourself in her shoes instead, if your actions are going to put her in a difficult position...by all means, avoid those actions. What she needs right now is not you, she needs to regain her parent's support.
Continue to be her frd up to the point of becoming her close frd, treat her like your best frd and you will do fine. Remember...I said frd, so please limit your rights to frd only and not bf. But you can still show her your love while you are still frds.
Tell her that you still like her...if you still does (Don't do this often...only occasionally and perhaps rarely when the moment is correct).
And you would rather be her frd than not in her life at all...agree? So go ahead and be her best and closest frd. I'm sure she won't mind to be frd with you at all.
It is really difficult to find someone that you truly like in this wide crazy world, and I'm happy that you have found yours. Good luck and all the best to both of you. Be patience and when things don't go well...remember that you are her frd and not her bf, so don't go and analyse her single day cos it is definitely going to make you a miserable boy. Give her a call if you miss her and be honest about yourself, honesty brings out the real frd in everyone...including you.
It is definitely not going to be easy for you, but think of it this way, if you are not there for her...how would you have felt if she's in trouble or having problems in the future?
Be there for her, for yourself and her. -
one sentence : move on - there are better things in lifeOriginally posted by SilverRevo:First Of All , Thanks To People showing Interest in this topic .. I like to get started by telling about my relationship with a girl .. She was younger than me by two years and we were in the same CCA .. one fine day after cca event , i got a chance to talk to her (junior) .. back then i didn't really know her , just found her cute .. she was waiting at the bus stop for her parents , the rest went to have dinner .. to my own surprise .. i got this compulsion to stay instead ... waited with her ... it was around 9-10 p.m ( public performance then) i guess i was infatuated .. she seemed so perfect .. i had a lot of concidence with her .. too numerous to quote .. it was september last year .. i got her number and contacted her ... over the weekend , i jumped into a silly mess by asking her to be my gf .. back then i was silly .. can't blame .. she thought over the weekend .. agreed on monday .. ever since i would be with her after cca , send her back whenever i could .. but she had a best friend who sort of liked me before .. rumors were that she made my gf agreed to get back at me .. my gf was easily influenced .. throughout three months i was only with her during dawn and dusk .. came to school with her during holidays for cca .. and send her back ... we didn't went out once on a serious date ... the next thing that happened stirred up everything .. her cousin (one years older than her) objected to her having a relationship for she thinks that my gf is too young ... from then on .. we drifted apart .. first i couldn't talk to her in school , couldn't sent her back , can't wait at te bus stop for her ... my gf was afraid that someone sees .. eventually her phone was taken by her parents as they were expecting more from her results .. then i couldn't call .. couldn't message .. but i still kept on waiting .. believing that we would continue .. her best friend continue to avoid me .. dragging my gf along . i had practically no contact with her till she got her phone back .. we managed to message .. however her tone was that as if we broke up already .. i managed to make her feel comfortable with the waiting .. she said that i should find somebody more worthy of my love .. (addition , she told me months ago about something bad that happened to her in the past .. i accepted her still ..) .. just when it's possible that we would get back together again .. she gave me a message saying that she hates me , wanting to return my things .. she reject all my calls and didn't reply my messages .. i waited for things to cool .. called her sister .. who said that i should wait .. lots of my friends thinks that it's her best friend that influenced her decision .. in fact .. one of my friend quoted that my physical gf was indeed her but mentally is her best friend .. i got lots of advice .. saying that she would believe in her friends more , and prefer their company .. well .. all this while i accepted it .. on valentines' day .. i gave her a present which was .. expensive to a certain extent .. she didn't want to accept .. now she gave me back everything .. i' wondering whether i should continue to wait for something to happen or for time to pass then talk to her .. her best friend is forever in the way .. perhaps all hope is lost ... sorry for the long message .. thanks for listening .. feel free to comment -
You are too young le la, I believe she is also around your age.
Make studies your first priority ba. -
Try watching Great Expectations.
Move on and if there's ever a chance to meet her and chat up with her re-consider that opportunity again.
People will not judge you for anything because you didn't do anything wrong. So you don't have to wait for her, why? Because it's strong infatuation, nothing more.
your friend's quote on physical and mental gf is pure crap.
Be strong and walk on k?
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Try if you can work your way through as her friend instead?Originally posted by SilverRevo:Well ... perhaps we are young ... Waiting for her is painful .. Waiting Hurts , without knowing how she is .. perhaps i'm blind .. maybe i'm too good to her .. she says i am too good to her .. my friends know too .. i'm sixteen this years .. she wasn't a distraction to my studies .. i scored better with her as motivation ... but now .. i'm not sure what to do .. she told me not to wait .. she was afraid that by the end of these years , she might not like me anymore .. for your infomation .. she was my first gf ..
But don't try too hard okie? -
hmm.. it wld be appreciated if u can write in paragraphs... easier readin