verge of divorce
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me and my wife could be on the verge of divorce. this is because she suspected me of having an affair which i never did commit. the very reason i stop communicating with all my female friends made her suspect that i have been hiding something from her. she dont believe my explaination and i have since stop explaining whenever she bring this topic on and off. i just keep quiet and stop arguement.
i have a daughter which i love her so much that the very idea of not able to bring her up in a healthy and happy family hurt me very much. i worry that she will have a unhappy childhood.
we both come from different background. she is raise in a western country whereelse i am 100% singaporean. cultural difference result in alot of confusion that did not occur during courtship and has since cause countless argument over how to raise kids, educational future for her.
life has since been miserable for me. if we dont have a child, decision could be straight forward. i love my daughter. and i cant let her suffer without the love of mother. -
Dear Reyes,
If your wife has been brought up in a more westernised environment, would she be open to marriage counselling? Advice on issues regarding trust is better sought from professional marriage consultants. There may be a chance that your marriage can be salvaged.
Notwithstanding the above, I have read in various magazines that the younger your daughter is, the better she will be able to adapt and eventually accept your divorce (this is in general, academically speaking. However, it all depends on the individual child).
You can also ease your daughter's feelings of loss prior to, during, & after the divorce by talking to her & helping her to understand. Words like, "Your mummy & I are having problems, & it makes us unhappy, so we have to go on our separate ways. I'm sure you want us to be happy, right? But, it doesn't mean that just because we go our separate ways, we don't love you. I'll always love you, & so will Mummy. We'll always be here for you".
During the separation & divorce proceedings, keep calling her to ask about her day, reassure her, etc, so that she doesn't feel as if her world is falling apart. Try to make things as normal for her as possible. Since you love your daughter so much, for her sake, try to maintain a cordial relationship with your wife, so that your daughter is able to see both of you & know that both of you will always be there for her.
Hopefully, this will lessen her feelings of loss & trauma.
FeowFeowOriginally posted by reyes:me and my wife could be on the verge of divorce. this is because she suspected me of having an affair which i never did commit. the very reason i stop communicating with all my female friends made her suspect that i have been hiding something from her. she dont believe my explaination and i have since stop explaining whenever she bring this topic on and off. i just keep quiet and stop arguement.
i have a daughter which i love her so much that the very idea of not able to bring her up in a healthy and happy family hurt me very much. i worry that she will have a unhappy childhood.
we both come from different background. she is raise in a western country whereelse i am 100% singaporean. cultural difference result in alot of confusion that did not occur during courtship and has since cause countless argument over how to raise kids, educational future for her.
life has since been miserable for me. if we dont have a child, decision could be straight forward. i love my daughter. and i cant let her suffer without the love of mother. -
y don't you n your wife go see a marriage counsellorOriginally posted by reyes:me and my wife could be on the verge of divorce. this is because she suspected me of having an affair which i never did commit. the very reason i stop communicating with all my female friends made her suspect that i have been hiding something from her. she dont believe my explaination and i have since stop explaining whenever she bring this topic on and off. i just keep quiet and stop arguement.
i have a daughter which i love her so much that the very idea of not able to bring her up in a healthy and happy family hurt me very much. i worry that she will have a unhappy childhood.
we both come from different background. she is raise in a western country whereelse i am 100% singaporean. cultural difference result in alot of confusion that did not occur during courtship and has since cause countless argument over how to raise kids, educational future for her.
life has since been miserable for me. if we dont have a child, decision could be straight forward. i love my daughter. and i cant let her suffer without the love of mother. -
double posting -
Reyes,Originally posted by reyes:me and my wife could be on the verge of divorce. this is because she suspected me of having an affair which i never did commit. the very reason i stop communicating with all my female friends made her suspect that i have been hiding something from her. she dont believe my explaination and i have since stop explaining whenever she bring this topic on and off. i just keep quiet and stop arguement.
i have a daughter which i love her so much that the very idea of not able to bring her up in a healthy and happy family hurt me very much. i worry that she will have a unhappy childhood.
we both come from different background. she is raise in a western country whereelse i am 100% singaporean. cultural difference result in alot of confusion that did not occur during courtship and has since cause countless argument over how to raise kids, educational future for her.
life has since been miserable for me. if we dont have a child, decision could be straight forward. i love my daughter. and i cant let her suffer without the love of mother.
u onli say that she suspects you of having an affair, if u are not, why worry, just assure her that you wont lah
and by the way, why did you stop communicating with yr female frens outside, is it they hv the hots for you or kept pestering you , if not you can continue yr frenship with them, wat
if she is western educated, she shldnt be so narrow minded right
or maybe talk nicely to her and sound out how she feels -
I would second Devoid's suggestion to see a family counsellor...Originally posted by reyes:me and my wife could be on the verge of divorce. this is because she suspected me of having an affair which i never did commit. the very reason i stop communicating with all my female friends made her suspect that i have been hiding something from her. she dont believe my explaination and i have since stop explaining whenever she bring this topic on and off. i just keep quiet and stop arguement.
i have a daughter which i love her so much that the very idea of not able to bring her up in a healthy and happy family hurt me very much. i worry that she will have a unhappy childhood.
we both come from different background. she is raise in a western country whereelse i am 100% singaporean. cultural difference result in alot of confusion that did not occur during courtship and has since cause countless argument over how to raise kids, educational future for her.
life has since been miserable for me. if we dont have a child, decision could be straight forward. i love my daughter. and i cant let her suffer without the love of mother.
Why did she suspect you of adultery in the 1st place?
How old are the both of you? How long have you been married? How old is your daughter?
Don't worry too much about your daughter not having the love of her mum... The custody would probably goes to the mum if you're having a divorce... -
By keeping quiet... sometimes it feels like you are cutting her of from your life...
talk to her about your daily things ... I guess she needs more assurance. -
Your wife has losen confident of herself. Inferior complexity has overwhelm her resulting in jealousy. Tell your wife that you will love no other woman except her. If she wants to search for happiness alone, tell her to do so and you shall wait for her and not divorce her. I am sure she will think differently of you and losen her suspicion. Tell her that you dont mind her to talk to guys, trust her and she will trust you back.
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Originally posted by reyes:me and my wife could be on the verge of divorce. this is because she suspected me of having an affair which i never did commit. the very reason i stop communicating with all my female friends made her suspect that i have been hiding something from her. she dont believe my explaination and i have since stop explaining whenever she bring this topic on and off. i just keep quiet and stop arguement.
i have a daughter which i love her so much that the very idea of not able to bring her up in a healthy and happy family hurt me very much. i worry that she will have a unhappy childhood.
we both come from different background. she is raise in a western country whereelse i am 100% singaporean. cultural difference result in alot of confusion that did not occur during courtship and has since cause countless argument over how to raise kids, educational future for her.
life has since been miserable for me. if we dont have a child, decision could be straight forward. i love my daughter. and i cant let her suffer without the love of mother.
It seemed that you are willing to repair the relationship for the sake of your child. Nothing good or bad about it, however, like what everyone had mentioned, to seek for professional counselling would be your only option viable, unless you wish to opt for other alternatives that you never want to undertake.
By keeping quiet itself served to worsen your marriage further. It seemed the communication have been poor and deteriorating. You must recognise the fact that the outcome of your concerns revolves very strongly around the sustainability and life of your love. You CANNOT ignore the cracks that are surfacing in your marriage by displaying a 'Fine-I-will-shut-up' attitude.
Your wife's suspicion might have her own reasons for them. Do you know/understand why is she reacting in such a way? Have she shown strong signs of jealousy/possessive nature during BGR?
Compromising is also greatly missing in your marriage. It's utterly SILLY to ruin a marriage partially because of the management of your kids. This is suppose to be a TWO people thing and if disagreement occurs, compromising have to step in - She will make some decision and you... the others.
It may be wise to seek a third party to enlighten your marriage; namely counselling.
Cheers -
grow a long co.ck..shag your wife every night fully...see if after 1 week she'll still sing that stupid tune or not...
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Another BS. The threadstarter is very dispressed and asking for advices. If you are not able to provide any, view and move on to another thread. People like you are bad, gloating when ppl is down, laughing at others misfortune, there's no sympathy in you. Remember, what goes around, comes around.Originally posted by mahai102:grow a long co.ck..shag your wife every night fully...see if after 1 week she'll still sing that stupid tune or not...