Love problem here...need some help..
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Hope friends here or those who has been through the same situation give me some helpful advice on this...and tks for taking the time to read my thread:
I have been working in my new workplace(in a certain shopping centre) for almost six months since last dec.She was added to my shop 1mth after i came,....at the end of the first day of her coming here,..i decided to break the ice to have a little chat with her...and on the way home, i just thought to myself "nice~~...another chiobu working partner ".
As the days and months went by....we grew closer/friendlier.One of the things we love to do is to bicker(lol...)...sounds ridiculous,but it was fun and other colleuges just love to see us bickering..lol.
All the while,i knew she had a boyfriend from the conversation during the 1st day,so i always thought to myself "Just keep ""it"" this way and remain so.". Im not going to be a girlfriend-snatcher or anything remotely close to this,as i know how it feels to lose a gf...
And so....the days and mnths went by and we continued behaving as before...one thing i noticed was she was not always happy.She sometimes look listless and her eyes seem to be drifting off to someplace...
A few times,she even went to the toilet to cry ...
Through one of my closer female friend/colleuge and the one she confided in,i was able to find out that all this sadness is caused by her BF which is too long and complicated for me to explain here...
Recently on an assignment(both of us),we have to make a trip down to our HQ for some work......
At the end of the day when we were returning home(here comes my dilemma..)..i suggested we take the train to marina bay so we can actually sit down and not stand the whole way home(me yishun stn and her CCK stn).
We sat down at a corner of the train(not the two seater type),...i lent her one of my earphones so we can enjoy this fav song of mine(xing bu liao qing.....jiang nan..etc etc).....after one or two stns ...she starting to drift off
to dreamland(zzz..) ....I asked her if my songs is really so boring...lol...she said no....just that she is tired....after a while she asked if she can lay her head on my shoulders to rest......i think i mumbled something like "go ahead..",...and so she lay-ed her head on my shoulder. All the way from dolby ghaut to yishun stn...i just wished time would just stop... she layed closer and closer to me as each minute passed.....all the while i pretended to sleep as well.When the train reached yishun...i didn't get up and pretended to continue sleeping,...but instead,she tugged my arm gently and told me i had reached my stop.
Now the problem is i can't get her off my head anymore.........and i think of her everytime.........i want to confess my feelings to her..but i don't want to
be a gf-snatcher..*sigh* contradicting........
Does she know i have feelings for her?????
Does a girl who has a boyfriend lay her head on another guy's shoulders???
Should i confess?????......
Anyone can give me some helpful suggestions or analyzations? or moral support??.....
Thanks to anyone that took the time to read what i had written and expressed.
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Dun sound so self righteous....
y did u post dis anyway ?
hopin 4 sumone 2 say its ok for u 2 do dis ?
i dun dink its wrong to feel dis way abt sumone else...
but ultimately its wat u do nex dat sets apart a bastard from sumone who deserves respect... -
I had gals do that to me. Best thing to do is think nothing of it...if ur gona go beyond that, u will jus spoil the frendship..n if u did..u deserved it. Stop thinking too much n stick to ur principles
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You already know she has a boyfriend, and she knows that you know. If she wants to develop the friendship with you, she'd let you know when she is ready -- when her relationship with the current boyfriend is over.
Continue to be a co-worker and friend to her, nothing more. If you find it difficult to be a friend with the constant temptation to break your own rules, then just stay a safe distance away and stick to being a co-worker.
Talk is cheap. Prove with your actions: Don't become the very "gf-snatcher" that you claimed you were never going to be. -
Does she know i have feelings for her?????
Does a girl who has a boyfriend lay her head on another guy's shoulders???
Should i confess?????......
Anyone can give me some helpful suggestions or analyzations? or moral support??.....
Thanks to anyone that took the time to read what i had written and expressed.
Maybe she knows that u like her..
A girl who has bf might lay her head on another guy's shoulders..but it really depends on individual.
If she happens to get physical with you again, then remind her that she has a bf ba...and see how she reply/react.
Dun encourage u to break pple up..but then if her BF makes her unhappy..(u din say what he did to make her cry leh) but if he's a jerk, then I dun see anything wrong in u confessing ur liking to her and let her decide? But make sure she dun two time u or dump him bcos of u ba..hope u get wat i mean.. -
how about, she leaning her head on another guy's shoulder, and she already got a husband(you).???
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Become rich and den she and alot of other girls will automatically come to you...
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jz dun tink so much of wat she did.... maybe she need physical contact n interaction due to problems with bf... jz continue be a fren and be her listening ear... when she declare shes available then u r free to move in...
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She just needed a shoulder to rely on at that moment in time. She would've probably forgotten clean about it the next day. She doesn't know that you're interested in her and you're just another friend to her.
The point is, girls will never admit you to be their potential-bf unless you tell them that you're interested in them. But if the girl likes you, that's an entirely different story.
Good luck.Originally posted by Brightday:Hope friends here or those who has been through the same situation give me some helpful advice on this...and tks for taking the time to read my thread:
I have been working in my new workplace(in a certain shopping centre) for almost six months since last dec.She was added to my shop 1mth after i came,....at the end of the first day of her coming here,..i decided to break the ice to have a little chat with her...and on the way home, i just thought to myself "nice~~...another chiobu working partner ".
As the days and months went by....we grew closer/friendlier.One of the things we love to do is to bicker(lol...)...sounds ridiculous,but it was fun and other colleuges just love to see us bickering..lol.
All the while,i knew she had a boyfriend from the conversation during the 1st day,so i always thought to myself "Just keep ""it"" this way and remain so.". Im not going to be a girlfriend-snatcher or anything remotely close to this,as i know how it feels to lose a gf...
And so....the days and mnths went by and we continued behaving as before...one thing i noticed was she was not always happy.She sometimes look listless and her eyes seem to be drifting off to someplace...
A few times,she even went to the toilet to cry ...
Through one of my closer female friend/colleuge and the one she confided in,i was able to find out that all this sadness is caused by her BF which is too long and complicated for me to explain here...
Recently on an assignment(both of us),we have to make a trip down to our HQ for some work......
At the end of the day when we were returning home(here comes my dilemma..)..i suggested we take the train to marina bay so we can actually sit down and not stand the whole way home(me yishun stn and her CCK stn).
We sat down at a corner of the train(not the two seater type),...i lent her one of my earphones so we can enjoy this fav song of mine(xing bu liao qing.....jiang nan..etc etc).....after one or two stns ...she starting to drift off
to dreamland(zzz..) ....I asked her if my songs is really so boring...lol...she said no....just that she is tired....after a while she asked if she can lay her head on my shoulders to rest......i think i mumbled something like "go ahead..",...and so she lay-ed her head on my shoulder. All the way from dolby ghaut to yishun stn...i just wished time would just stop... she layed closer and closer to me as each minute passed.....all the while i pretended to sleep as well.When the train reached yishun...i didn't get up and pretended to continue sleeping,...but instead,she tugged my arm gently and told me i had reached my stop.
Now the problem is i can't get her off my head anymore.........and i think of her everytime.........i want to confess my feelings to her..but i don't want to
be a gf-snatcher..*sigh* contradicting........
Does she know i have feelings for her?????
Does a girl who has a boyfriend lay her head on another guy's shoulders???
Should i confess?????......
Anyone can give me some helpful suggestions or analyzations? or moral support??.....
Thanks to anyone that took the time to read what i had written and expressed. -
There are many sides of a story.
Your side,
Her side,
And the outsiders side.
Well, we as outsiders can either think in your position, or her position.
You see, having a girl lay her head on your shoulder is actually a very simple thing that she may not have thought more of.
But the effect it has on guys... whoa. You'll be really surprised.
That's why and how girls often misled guys into thinking they like them.
Its really sad actually, that sometimes they send out these signals without having having second thoughts... its just natural to them.
But you have to be careful. Really. Sometimes things are not as simple as they seem, and well sometimes, things are really that simple.
Give it a few weeks and see what happens. Choose to the best of your ability...~ -
it might not really mean anything for a gal to lean on ur shoulders...err...Maybe it did but I didnt catch it then?or it could be a moment of weakness...Anyway...my suggestion is not to think too much on the shoulder thingy and concentrate on developing ur friendship with her...if she breaks...U would know...if she doesnt...then stick to what U think U should do.Originally posted by Brightday:Thanks to anyone that took the time to read what i had written and expressed. -
hmm she was ADDED to my shop lol is she some animal or something?
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Subjective...Originally posted by Brightday:Hope friends here or those who has been through the same situation give me some helpful advice on this...and tks for taking the time to read my thread:
I have been working in my new workplace(in a certain shopping centre) for almost six months since last dec.She was added to my shop 1mth after i came,....at the end of the first day of her coming here,..i decided to break the ice to have a little chat with her...and on the way home, i just thought to myself "nice~~...another chiobu working partner ".
As the days and months went by....we grew closer/friendlier.One of the things we love to do is to bicker(lol...)...sounds ridiculous,but it was fun and other colleuges just love to see us bickering..lol.
All the while,i knew she had a boyfriend from the conversation during the 1st day,so i always thought to myself "Just keep ""it"" this way and remain so.". Im not going to be a girlfriend-snatcher or anything remotely close to this,as i know how it feels to lose a gf...
And so....the days and mnths went by and we continued behaving as before...one thing i noticed was she was not always happy.She sometimes look listless and her eyes seem to be drifting off to someplace...
A few times,she even went to the toilet to cry ...
Through one of my closer female friend/colleuge and the one she confided in,i was able to find out that all this sadness is caused by her BF which is too long and complicated for me to explain here...
Recently on an assignment(both of us),we have to make a trip down to our HQ for some work......
At the end of the day when we were returning home(here comes my dilemma..)..i suggested we take the train to marina bay so we can actually sit down and not stand the whole way home(me yishun stn and her CCK stn).
We sat down at a corner of the train(not the two seater type),...i lent her one of my earphones so we can enjoy this fav song of mine(xing bu liao qing.....jiang nan..etc etc).....after one or two stns ...she starting to drift off
to dreamland(zzz..) ....I asked her if my songs is really so boring...lol...she said no....just that she is tired....after a while she asked if she can lay her head on my shoulders to rest......i think i mumbled something like "go ahead..",...and so she lay-ed her head on my shoulder. All the way from dolby ghaut to yishun stn...i just wished time would just stop... she layed closer and closer to me as each minute passed.....all the while i pretended to sleep as well.When the train reached yishun...i didn't get up and pretended to continue sleeping,...but instead,she tugged my arm gently and told me i had reached my stop.
Now the problem is i can't get her off my head anymore.........and i think of her everytime.........i want to confess my feelings to her..but i don't want to
be a gf-snatcher..*sigh* contradicting........
Does she know i have feelings for her?????
Does a girl who has a boyfriend lay her head on another guy's shoulders???
Should i confess?????......
Anyone can give me some helpful suggestions or analyzations? or moral support??.....
Thanks to anyone that took the time to read what i had written and expressed.
It can mean she's interested in you; it can mean nothing; it can mean she just needed a shoulder to rely on; can mean she's not certain herself....
Your best chance is to help her look into her problem? Chat with her about it perhaps if you want? Perhaps you'll have a clearer picture as to where you wanna head for after that...?
I don't know what you'll call yourself or what others would call you after that though... But i would say try to find out more as to what is really happening 1st...? If she's in need of your help, are you gonna ignore her?
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wat gf snatcher.. who hand long who take.. if the bf cant keep his own gf who can he blame ... come on la...be 100% sure u can snatch liao then worried abt the ques.. if i were u i wont care so much will juz go ahead and chase her. unless her bf is someone i noe or else bring it on..
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Snatching someone else's gf is not right.
How does it feel if your gf snatched by another guy you barely knew.You will be plagued with alot of things like how will the guy treat her,what are they doing now when you are crying your heart out on your bed etc etc.
What Ill do is Ill wait for her relationship with her bf to be over.While waiting,strengthen the friendship by bickering with her often
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The girl was simply tired and needed a place to rest her head so she could sleep a little bit better. Don't think too much. You are being silly and having all these thoughts because u like her and suppressed ur feelings all this while, but what about her? She was simply tired, that's all. Don't read too much into it and don't start to think nonsense.
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x2Originally posted by alexkusu:I had gals do that to me. Best thing to do is think nothing of it...if ur gona go beyond that, u will jus spoil the frendship..n if u did..u deserved it. Stop thinking too much n stick to ur principles
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btw any update?
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dun think i will be taking any action.....hai
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Simple short and sharp.
Do what you want to do, if she is yours she will be.
If she love her bf and enjoy the torture she will never leave him.
If she leave her bf and go to you, be prepare she will do the same to you 1 day.
If she nv leave her bf now, she might later to another. -
Be a friend.
Be a gentleman.
Be a man of strong emotional support, not a weak one.
Make her feel loved.
Make her feel happy whenever she's with you.
Make her laugh.
If you truly have feelings for her and want things to develop,
do your part and leave the choice to stay or leave her bf to her.
Don't leave her alone and push her to her bf - you'll be devastating her.
If her bf truly loves her, he should give her that loving not painful feeling. -
she cry becos she still loves her bf.
She thinks of ways to solve her problems thats why she day dreams.
If you do not love someone anymore will you even want to cry for him or her?
I believe she treat you like a friend thats all.
Come on lar just lay her head on your arms must be interested in you meh?
Then am I rite to say that If those people who goes for one nite stands must get married?
Give the girl a break, she is just your friend. If you try to hint her more, she for sure siam you one. If you really love her then just be there for her.