i don't trust marriage
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i always go to those kind of ktv cos my frx work there, den i saw most of the men there r married, n yet they do such thingOriginally posted by FORGET-ME-NOT:Since like men can't keep their vow. I have came across too much of men cheating on their wife cases. I just don't understand why some women can tolerate and still cling on the relationship. Hoping that the husband will turn over a new leaf or for the sake of face? When men said 'I love you' to me, I really feel nothing. What is 'love' to them? -
dont sign dont get married. simpleOriginally posted by dragg:who will sign an agreement with you.
only the rich can convince women to do it. -
i agree with u.. in total its the thinking and need of ours has change as the time pass..
Originally posted by Devil1976:Hmm... Actually wanted to start a thread on this.. But since there's this topic here... Why not?
Personally. I feel that marriage is just a form of 'legal commitment'. And in the legal terms, women would have much more to benefit than men. So the whole thing works in such a way that once 'commited' to a marriage, it goes to show the 'devotion' and commitment a guy has for a woman.. Which of course.. Don't always have to be necessarily true in the sense...
It used to be a much more effective means because men used to be the sole bread-winner in the family. Hence the structure and meaning is there. Women while through that would earn a certain 'security' from it. More in terms of financial and commitment.
Today, as women becomes more indepedent... They no longer 'rely' on such a form of 'motivation'. Marriage only goes to show that the man is willing to 'sacrifice' for her in certain ways (because men has more to lose in marriage in legal terms). Whereas the women's part in a marriage is more of 'free-will'. (often a happily married woman would be more naturally commited to a marriage. Theoreotically speaking, so can a man.)
However, women have a higher tendency to commit to a 'family building' than men often. To breed, grow and gain satisfaction from it. Men on the other hand has a higher tendency to find 'means of satisfaction' all over the place. (not saying all men are like that.)
But due to cultural exposal and such... Various women's and men's thoughts and thinkings also begin to 'drift'... The extent, depending on individual's mentality... -
dats y i say human do change not only man.. women change too...Originally posted by makiko:my frx n her husband were together since they were 15 yrs old, n got married 10yrs later. but the on the third mth of their marriage, that guy befriend with other woman n requested for a divorce.
hmmmmmmmm.......................
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may sound harsh but if gals have such thinking. is bcoz explorature nt enuf.. its common thing in life for guys to go such place esp in buiz.. called it the entertainment..
For me frankly, if my hubby go i am ok with it.. so long he know how to come home haa... if drunk i hope can call me up to pick him coz i dnt wanna see him crash haa... to me a man wanna stray no matter what he still will..
so relax is the medicine. the more u tied him, the more he hate us. that's human. maybe i am a dolphin itself so i dnt wish him to tied me nor me tied him.. A dolphin living in a tank will die eventually.
Just like rubber band theory: too lose it slip, too tight it snap..
Originally posted by makiko:i always go to those kind of ktv cos my frx work there, den i saw most of the men there r married, n yet they do such thing -
Is this a hate all married man topic?
Come on! do u mean married ladies do not cheat?
I am surprise to see this always guys kenna and never ladies! So am I right to say the married ladies never flirt and never sleep around?
Everytime is always the guys must be the bad person!
Ladies always the goody ones!
If u hate guys so much then be a lesbain better, why waste so much time thinking of a marriage when you are so scared of getting married and scare kenna cheated? -
gals r the worse cheaters on earth. i know of many married women who sleep behind their hubby's back. & the worst thing is they always have n excuse 4 doin so.
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Originally posted by MRMUSICPRODUCER:gals r the worse cheaters on earth. i know of many married women who sleep behind their hubby's back. & the worst thing is they always have n excuse 4 doin so.
ok. woman r slutsOriginally posted by drx:Is this a hate all married man topic?
Come on! do u mean married ladies do not cheat?
I am surprise to see this always guys kenna and never ladies! So am I right to say the married ladies never flirt and never sleep around?
Everytime is always the guys must be the bad person!
Ladies always the goody ones!
If u hate guys so much then be a lesbain better, why waste so much time thinking of a marriage when you are so scared of getting married and scare kenna cheated? -
is tat true?? i knw someone working there n have the "opportunity" to go there once or twice a wk......................Originally posted by subarugal:may sound harsh but if gals have such thinking. is bcoz explorature nt enuf.. its common thing in life for guys to go such place esp in buiz.. called it the entertainment..
For me frankly, if my hubby go i am ok with it.. so long he know how to come home haa... if drunk i hope can call me up to pick him coz i dnt wanna see him crash haa... to me a man wanna stray no matter what he still will..
so relax is the medicine. the more u tied him, the more he hate us. that's human. maybe i am a dolphin itself so i dnt wish him to tied me nor me tied him.. A dolphin living in a tank will die eventually.
Just like rubber band theory: too lose it slip, too tight it snap.. -
i presume u as gal ok..
gal, if u question these, i can tell you very true in buiz really hard to avoid such places we may lose some deals. Me co. my bosses to such place too..
Seen alot.. The guys know their limits. Hug n kisses times up.. Male-Cinderella lor..
Just take it as they went for sight-seeing my dear.
If its meant to be urs, its urs.. Y make our life miserable when life is already enuf problem. If u chosen that man of urs, accept it and trust it lor.. if nt dnt married lor.. easy as that..
Originally posted by makiko:is tat true?? i knw someone working there n have the "opportunity" to go there once or twice a wk...................... -
Count 1 to 100 ?
Guys or Gals are human.
Accept the facts human do change and heart do change too..
So Man strays ? So do gals. No-one actually say gals dnt leh ?
these is a fair world. If u stray be prepare to face it when ur partner stray.
Take two hand to clap, isn't it ?Originally posted by MRMUSICPRODUCER:gals r the worse cheaters on earth. i know of many married women who sleep behind their hubby's back. & the worst thing is they always have n excuse 4 doin so. -
actually it is quite fair.Originally posted by drx:Is this a hate all married man topic?
Come on! do u mean married ladies do not cheat?
I am surprise to see this always guys kenna and never ladies! So am I right to say the married ladies never flirt and never sleep around?
Everytime is always the guys must be the bad person!
Ladies always the goody ones!
If u hate guys so much then be a lesbain better, why waste so much time thinking of a marriage when you are so scared of getting married and scare kenna cheated?
men always complain about women being materialistic and are only interested in rich men.
women always complain about men being infidel after marriage. -
Btw i just have a questions for all ...
Married ? Did those ppl b4 getting married ask themselve. What are the reason to getting married ?
Age catching up ? Love ? Someone to depend on ? some gals just have fantasy of wearing gown ? Or just plain brainless thinking of passing the family line ? (Sorry if sounded harsh but i really cnt take this crapz as for me i like the idea of give birth due to love nt ...)
i have a few fren who got married then realise the committment behind marriage is only tonnes n tonnes of billings.. Sudden ppl out there shld have think and be prepare for such things b4 stepping into marriage ?
These ladies and man now got freak out becoz of that.. really brainless or wat ? Haiz..
I dont trust marriage but if i were to married i will be ready to take up all. That's life. Most impt for me i guess to be financially stable myself.. -
so u r trying 2 say if a man stray, the gal must stray 2? even if she knows its wrong 2 sleep with another man? u r a dangerous & of cos stupid. when u c your hse on fire, will u put out the fire 1st or ask who set the fire? revenge isnt tat advisable in this case. solving the prob is. try lookin from diff pts of view & diff directions instead of thinking it your own way.Originally posted by subarugal:Count 1 to 100 ?
Guys or Gals are human.
Accept the facts human do change and heart do change too..
So Man strays ? So do gals. No-one actually say gals dnt leh ?
these is a fair world. If u stray be prepare to face it when ur partner stray.
Take two hand to clap, isn't it ? -
wrong again...
revenge ? Not so free to revenge and it certain nt worth revenging on a man who stray. more on trying to advise before u leap for stray .. think before u leap. If u dnt feel gd ur wife stray den she dnt feel gd if u stray. Dnt u tink its abit selfish if a man stray expect wife to forgive n forget.
And more on giving up on man who stray and look for my new life else where. For what we revenge on man who stray ?
everybody has diff thinking i am more on the leave everything down if it fail to made any improvements. Move on lor.
relax pal..Originally posted by MRMUSICPRODUCER:so u r trying 2 say if a man stray, the gal must stray 2? even if she knows its wrong 2 sleep with another man? u r a dangerous & of cos stupid. when u c your hse on fire, will u put out the fire 1st or ask who set the fire? revenge isnt tat advisable in this case. solving the prob is. try lookin from diff pts of view & diff directions instead of thinking it your own way. -
Originally posted by macjoe:You're absolutely right - marriage draws no line on anything - it's dovey love, love, love, love.
But there's always a time for everything and most often than not, there's a time for divorce and that's when divorce draws the line in between very clearly especially on financial and asset matters. Where's love in that?
Does/can love still save it?
There are two sides to everything - including marriage and the other side is divorce.
The marriage structure is probably the worst life structure a person blinded by love should jump into these days.
You see, you are quite bend on seeing marriage will probably lead to divorce by chance OR rather, a topic that HAS to be considered before an actual marriage take place - the 'What if.' This is the intellectual/civil minded way of looking at things - the calculation... the contingency... the format that you apply. You are right about people jumping into marriage recklessly and as I have mentioned the definition of marriage - it is THE recognition of the next phrase the couples' love has evolved. IF the couples' love is nowhere near that level, the fulfillment and overall marriage experience will be limited or negative.
Love cannot save the unwilling - divorce signify the malignant growth of either one unwilling partner through constant conflicts. And because you are unwilling, Love cannot retain you. With Love (Venus), attracts money, and divorce is to lose that quality.
P.S: Cast away cynical thoughts and give Love (more importantly yourself) a chance to tell you the proper message it holds.
Cheers -
I agree that marriage has lost it's significance.
1) People nowadays are very individualistic. The union of 2 people is to forgo part of own ideology and to embrace a new selfless mentality that marriage entails. Unfortunately, this concept is not fully understood by one or both parties.
2) The existence of Woman's Charter that results in a lopsided contract of marriage.(P.S- On the other hand, women keep stressing on gender equality which if thats the case, Woman's Charter shd be abolished as not to create double standards right??). Men will experience the devastating effects when women exercise this right when marriage FAILS!)
3) IN this society of eroded values, more women are having affairs than before and generally I feel that the man will lose out more in terms of their ego and chauvinism if his wife really betray him. (P.S- No maintanence for man hor!)
MOre to add on but guess the above factors are enough to justify the imbalance and pointlessness of marriage.. -
I believe Love is blind and is the driving force for all supposingly good things that comes with it (ie-marriage, having kids, enjoying happy family life etc)
What I believe at this point of time is companionship or even cohabitation, kids or no kids does not matter cos we are in a capitalistic age now, not socialism. Ultimately is whether you are healthy and financially sound in your golden years. Having kids are merely investing in a false perception that your old age will be secured, which most prob will not materialised.
I believe in being smart. Never to invest too much in relationship but instead, invest in yourself. THERE IS NO LOVE GREATER IN THE WORLD THAN SELF LOVE..LOVE YOURSELF AND YOU WILL BE LOVED BY OTHERS. -
Originally posted by sgcuteyboy:
love better not be blind, must open the eyes big to see WHO u r gonna sign the lifebond with.....
I believe Love is blind and is the driving force for all supposingly good things that comes with it (ie-marriage, having kids, enjoying happy family life etc)
What I believe at this point of time is companionship or even cohabitation, kids or no kids does not matter cos we are in a capitalistic age now, not socialism. Ultimately is whether you are healthy and financially sound in your golden years. Having kids are merely investing in a false perception that your old age will be secured, which most prob will not materialised.
[b]I believe in being smart. Never to invest too much in relationship but instead, invest in yourself. THERE IS NO LOVE GREATER IN THE WORLD THAN SELF LOVE..LOVE YOURSELF AND YOU WILL BE LOVED BY OTHERS. [/b]
whether u r married or not, all must love ourselves and stay healthy and be financially sound.....
having kids is not a investment....its a package that comes with marriage....its a movement onto another stage of life challenge....its a mental and emotional fulfilment stage...its another stage of life to make u fill complete....u learn alot with/thru them..... -
Come to think of it... It's interesting to see what 'power' can do to people...?
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wat kind of power?? power of love??Originally posted by Devil1976:Come to think of it... It's interesting to see what 'power' can do to people...?
create synergies? -
I dun agree wif u actually ..... gals oso greedy n wan more .... after marriage I'm satisfied .... but my wife not .... and my wife is the one who stray away ..... I oredi put in all my heart n soul to maintain a happy family ... but in the end ... she choose to leave me ...... sighOriginally posted by jules_yan:sigh... relationships these days r so hard to maintain. i think pp now r harder to pls, more ambitious, n have higher expectations. true for both guys n gals. but i think guys r alwaz the one who's greedy n want more.
so after marriage, they r still not satisfied w having a good wife n a good family. they'll juz stray away, looking for more things for their own stuck up life. alwaz being selfish.
this is wat i think. obviously a cynic. so wat's e pt of getting married? unless there's this super duper tame n nice guy, who'll be satisfied and happy with juz having a good wife and a good family, who'll be willing to put in his heart n soul to maintain a happy family. (where to find nowadays?!?!?!!?!?)
well, this topic of guys vs gals in a marriage has been a hot topic in Today's paper for quite some time liao. can check it out for other's view of marriage!
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women can't keep their vow too ..... I'm a very good example .... wife cheated on me ..... and I still keep gving her chances but she still dun change .... sighOriginally posted by FORGET-ME-NOT:Since like men can't keep their vow. I have came across too much of men cheating on their wife cases. I just don't understand why some women can tolerate and still cling on the relationship. Hoping that the husband will turn over a new leaf or for the sake of face? When men said 'I love you' to me, I really feel nothing. What is 'love' to them? -
Hearing legal issues and tussles over Newsradio about marriage disputes, divorces and legal proceedings is scary. Besides the blissful side of marriage, it sure has a very ugly legal side.
Does marriage make one safer or sorry? I think other than the blissful "truth", there's another side of truth - sorry for one party and safer for the other from the legal point of view.