Death...
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One of my friend passed away lately... Was a schoolmate.
Feeling very upset now, though i wasn't in very very close terms with that person.
But now, I'm not sure am I feeling upset for him or because of some other problems with my love-life.
Consulted a few people... but seems to be no help... heart is wrenching now everytime i think of it. Almost on the verge of tears.
Thank you for listening... -
What did he die of?Originally posted by WoShiNoobie:One of my friend passed away lately... Was a schoolmate.
Feeling very upset now, though i wasn't in very very close terms with that person.
But now, I'm not sure am I feeling upset for him or because of some other problems with my love-life.
Consulted a few people... but seems to be no help... heart is wrenching now everytime i think of it. Almost on the verge of tears.
Thank you for listening... -
When ur time come,if u have to go,u have to go.
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how old are you? are you upset because you are confronted with mortality?Originally posted by WoShiNoobie:One of my friend passed away lately... Was a schoolmate.
Feeling very upset now, though i wasn't in very very close terms with that person.
But now, I'm not sure am I feeling upset for him or because of some other problems with my love-life.
Consulted a few people... but seems to be no help... heart is wrenching now everytime i think of it. Almost on the verge of tears.
Thank you for listening... -
I understand how you feel..
It seems as if there's so many uncertainties and unpredictables things in this world. Really duno what will happen tmr.. I was in a loss for some time too when my father passed away.. but then you will be fine.. face the music. -
I believe it was some kind of an accident...Originally posted by SMAPLionHeart:What did he die of?
I know Death is inevitable... I already accepted that... but i don't understand the pain... So many things happening... i'm really on the verge of breaking down...
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my condolences... my classmate's fren oso passed away... yesterday nite...
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I thought who called me sia...
My condolences... -
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow.
Learn as if you were to live forever."
-- Mahatma Gandhi
Death is but another passing phase.
Try not to feel too sad over your friend's departure. The point is not to live the life we have over regrets, but to leave the life we had without regrets.
Death within our social circle is a good reminder to us that life is fragile -- the pain of loss is natural. Rejoice in the fact that your friend's death has brought to those he left behind sadness, instead of happiness. He has enriched their lives with his existence and his own life has become the richer for it as well.
Seek to enrich our lives such that when the time comes for Death to smile at us, we shall be ready to smile back and move on. -
All things in this world are transient. Learn to accept this truth.
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Sorry to hear about your loss.
Maybe lots of people have told you this, but you've got to learn to accept and get over it. I'm sure your friend wouldn't like to see you constantly in pain over him.
I can't speak for him... but I'm sure he would want you to move on with your life. -
i share your sorrow as i myself had lost a good friend before...
Death is a way of life. Many great philosophers had always avoided the question of death as it is something horrifying and not worth talking much. It usually marks the end of all life journeys. Even in the warrior paths, death is the ultimate end for all warriors path. I guess the mention of death will strike fear in all mortal beings. Most people fear of death for they are afraid of sinking into some deep oblivion and never emerge again. Some just fear of losing all the things that they work so hard and had to be lost when death approaches.
As a free thinker, I did not have much or even any faith. I guess some religious people are able to draw their strength to face death with their strong faith. As I talked to religious people, most of them do not fear death. It is no wonder or something to be extraordinary.
To them, when they died, they do not perish permanently, but instead they move to the kingdom of heaven. In there, they will find entire life and peace. I guess that will make death a bit more pleasure and assuring lol
But people like us who are free thinker, our faith can be pretty low as we do not believe much in anything. It can be extremely difficult not to fear death. Instead I manage to find my revelation in death through eastern philosophy.
Lord Buddha is actually a mortal but due to his great deeds, people decide worship him as a god. I had nothing against that but I found his philosophy in death interesting and yet wise. Let me share this tale with you all.
There was once Lord Buddha was walking past a village. A woman who recently lost her child then came begging to him and asked him for a miracle to return her child. Lord Buddha smile but with sad eyes, he asked her, “If you can go through the entire village and get a mustard seed from families whom death had not come to them before, I will bring your child back.” Then the young woman tears became joy as she hurry searches the village for a mustard seed. However as she searches the village for the whole day, she just can’t find one. She came back to Lord Buddha disappointed. Then Lord Buddha smile and slowly explains her why. As she can see, death is everywhere and it touches the lives of everyone. She is not alone in this world to have some one loved taken away by death, but everyone had experience the loss taken by death. It’s just a way of life. Those wise words eventually brought some relief for poor woman.
I must agree that death of a loved one is difficult to deal with it. It not only takes mortal courage but the will power to let go. I had came past of a story which I hear from the radio talk show. This lady had basically lost her child a few years back and until today she was still unable to forgive herself or even forget about her child death. She cried every time she remembers her dead child.
I pity her and I guess the mustard story will most probably do her no good for she had being suffering for many years and still unable to let go of her child death. The mustard story as I felt is only useful advise when one person just recently lost someone but when someone lost a loved one for many years, a different philosophy must be used.
As Lord Buddha said, we suffered because of the attachment we put ourselves to this mortal world. The stage is first hope, like, desire, attached and then sorrow. When a loved or closes one dies, we lost that attachment which so much can define part of our life as a person. It is nature for us to be selfish and for us to fall into a deep resent if we lost that attachment that defines us or fulfill us. Its a price we paid for having attachment to life but yet it makes our lives so much fufilling....
I will like to use this philosophy on time. When a person dies, most people will often indulge themselves at the point of the person death. They blame and linger like a ghost at the time of death. When they do that, they stay at that point in time and never move. Thus they suffer.
Time is a river flowing and how time follows is how our brain perceives. That means in simple explanation, when information comes to us, it goes to our eyes, then through our nerves, then to our brain and then our brain will break down the information and then create logic to make sense of the information and finally use our feelings and expression to express the information.
People who lost their loved ones and canÂ’t get over it, tend to stop their time movement in their lives (by mentally although physical time is still moving) Most of these people are lost and will need some sort of guidance to guide them. My philosophy, is to concentrate on the time of past instead of the time point of death. You see, people tend to emerge themselves in the pain and agony of death that they often had forgotten the good memories of the dead when they died. Instead they choose to linger on a lost cause of suffering. These people should firstly stop blaming themselves for the death and think of the memories when loved ones are still alive. Cherish their memories and time spent with them. Use the time frame of these past memories as source of strength to live. To be truthfully those dead loved ones will never want to see the living loved ones to be suffering for them too.
For the lady who lost her child, she should stop blaming herself as a useless mother as she is not. The fact she is remorse means she loved her child and had already given all she can do to love the child. Instead she should try to remember all the happy memories spent with the lost child when he/she is still alive. Memories are precious and powerful things which help us to define ourselves. Cherish the memories and one will find strength to stand up and continue living.
Ask you all another interesting questions, do you fear if you lost your all memories in life? Well think about it. -
life is unpredictable I for one, is afraid of death too.
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uncertainty in life = reality
death = reality (untils people invents anti aging things)
most of you all dunno, some scientists in studying aging is already claiming
life extension technique available in 25 years times as human gains more
knowledge and technology to battke ageing.
if you are twenties year old, the there is a high chance of boarding the
long life train. better still if you are below ten years old.
for those in the above forty categories , still got some chance lah.
even if we invent anti gaeing stuff, still can get killed by freaked accident
accepting reality is the only choice we have, if you are going to die tomolo,
just accept the fact, and quickly book a six star hotel in dubai, hire a few
girls with your unused savings, and have a good fuck of your life
before dying. -
when someone dies it is those alive that needs comfort.
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You didn't cherish the times together with him?
Learn to cherish the times together with your loved ones
Life is short Sometimes is too short -
Originally posted by reclusivewriter:
You may be reclusive and don't write often, but in the rare occasions when you do write, you write much meaningful stuff. Amitabha.
As Lord Buddha said, we suffered because of the attachment we put ourselves to this mortal world. The stage is first hope, like, desire, attached and then sorrow. When a loved or closes one dies, we lost that attachment which so much can define part of our life as a person. It is nature for us to be selfish and for us to fall into a deep resent if we lost that attachment that defines us or fulfill us. Its a price we paid for having attachment to life but yet it makes our lives so much fufilling....
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Ask you all another interesting questions, do you fear if you lost your all memories in life? Well think about it.
Before answering your interesting question, may I ask if you consider our memories too, as another "attachment we put [on] ourselves to this mortal world"?
While I must admit losing all my memories about my loved ones is a scary thought, from my personal encounters with people suffering from Alzheimer's disease, memory loss doesn't seem to afflict the victims themselves as much as those close to the victims. Perhaps when you don't know (or when you can't remember) what you're missing, you don't feel the pain of that loss?
"Ignorance is bliss", maybe?
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I had a classmate who died in an accident when I was 16. Although Im not that close, I felt a certain sadness and pain in my heart. A year later I changed schools.. And one subject was on Death, Grief and Dying. Surprise surprise..it was my classmate's father who was teaching it. What a small world. Well, basically all u need is time..and to bring closure to the past. U be fine if you can pull through the depression/grieving stage
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He was just a regular guy in school... not on very close terms with him... sort of like normal acquaintances only...Originally posted by maggot:You didn't cherish the times together with him?
Learn to cherish the times together with your loved ones
Life is short Sometimes is too short -
when a schoolmate pass away because of an accident i was very upset too. i dont know him well, but he was my school mate thru pri1 to pri6, sec1 to sec4 and he died in an accident a day before we collected our o level results.Originally posted by WoShiNoobie:He was just a regular guy in school... not on very close terms with him... sort of like normal acquaintances only...
you might be feeling upset over other matters but cant display it. when this friend died you use it as a front to be upset for. but you will get over it. -
Death makes u wonder why you care so much about petty conflicts, gossip etc.. Makes you focus on living life meaningfully and without regret .. -
how unfortunate that such sensibility only last a short while.Originally posted by DriftingGuy:Death makes u wonder why you care so much about petty conflicts, gossip etc.. Makes you focus on living life meaningfully and without regret .. -
Ya lor.. I think those who succeed in life have prolonged sensibilityOriginally posted by dragg:how unfortunate that such sensibility only last a short while. -
Jesus brought a dead man back. Ha
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If you are a person without faith, then, you must be stronger as you have nothing to rely on.