I think its time..
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There is something that is bothering me, so I thought I just get it out of my system in this forum under the mask of anonymity
I am in a relationship for nearly 3years now. It started in my 1st semester in campus till now. But the problem is, I feel this relationship is going nowhere, it is rather stagnant as a matter of fact. Gone are the days where my spirits used to lift up where I see her face. Now, everytime she sees me, its like 'oh, normal' kinda look. She dont seem so energetic as before as well. To be fair, she is a wonderful gf, who looks after me, cooks, for me, etc.
I did my part to revive the relationship. She did wanted a break in Feb but I told her to stay on and did what I could to save the relationship. I think I did my best, now looking back 6months ago, I think maybe its just time to let go. I think its best to break it off quick then let it drag on and on, because it will cause more suffering. I dont really want her to go throught that pain. Right now, I want to be single, to find my direction in life and have a degree of freedom that I cant have when in a relationship. I would like to break the news to her on Monday, but the thing is, her best friend is coming for a visit from Japan (my gf is japanese). She is excited to bring her friend around and I cant bear to break the news to her on Monday, because she will be sad about it but will put on a brave face for her friend. It breaks my heart for her to suffer like that, but life is tough and Im at loss what to do next. On the other hand, her friend can offer her some comfort as she is here. I thought of breaking the news to her after her friend is gone, but I decided against it. haih~
Oh well, I guess I need to do some serious thinking and decide what is best thing to do. Thanks for hearing my rant..feel free to criticise/comment.
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got a case same as u
want to break then say do not want to break, and quarrel again
a bit sainz of the whole cycle . -
Come come, let's go break.. monday is D-day. Maybe she take u for granted? Then wen ur gone she can appreciate u ma.Originally posted by drx:got a case same as u
want to break then say do not want to break, and quarrel again
a bit sainz of the whole cycle . -
ahh.. confusing confusing.. why not meet her friend first and see how she responds to her friend about you first before deciding on anything?
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I think quite delicate situation..her friend came to visit to clear her mind cos in Japan, her then bf cheated on her with another girl..so yeah...need to step carefully.Originally posted by coffeeortea:ahh.. confusing confusing.. why not meet her friend first and see how she responds to her friend about you first before deciding on anything? -
b4 u confirm n gurantee break, have a recap of wat went through all this time... then if u still feel the best is to leave her then do it straight away...
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nah the main problem is not me lor.
Is a couple i am helping out.
First, guy say want to break, then girl say no
then girl say want to break guy say no.
they together again now fighting again.
pengz the whole cycle goes on and on. -
yup. Breaking up is never easy.Originally posted by BrUtUs:b4 u confirm n gurantee break, have a recap of wat went through all this time... then if u still feel the best is to leave her then do it straight away...
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jap girl leh..
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Originally posted by usck:jap girl leh..
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Hmm...you seem to be a person who takes takes things too seriously?Originally posted by drx:nah the main problem is not me lor.
Is a couple i am helping out.
First, guy say want to break, then girl say no
then girl say want to break guy say no.
they together again now fighting again.
pengz the whole cycle goes on and on.
Chill.
Cheers -
i dunno what to say... there are no hard and fast rules to these things..
clearly, you have deep affection for her, because you don't want to see her suffer, and are contemplating all these things like "her friend may be around to comfort her"...
yet, there's this compulsion to be single again...
have you asked yourself why?
whatever it is, i do hope the both of you come through this, with the minimum of hurt and will be well in the shortest of time.. -
any problem?Originally posted by usck:jap girl leh.. 
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thanks for your advice bear.Originally posted by the Bear:i dunno what to say... there are no hard and fast rules to these things..
clearly, you have deep affection for her, because you don't want to see her suffer, and are contemplating all these things like "her friend may be around to comfort her"...
yet, there's this compulsion to be single again...
have you asked yourself why?
whatever it is, i do hope the both of you come through this, with the minimum of hurt and will be well in the shortest of time..
Anyway, just to update..i already broken off few hours ago.. She knew it the rs will end one day. We went to have supper and... basically it was mutual parting I guess. Now I have to wait a few more days for the aftershock if there is any -
mutual parting, now that's a good news... at least it was quick and painless, was it?? well, my heart goes out to you... all the best for your finding your direction thing.
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Well at least its a mutual breakup and not a one dumps someone for another kind of breakup -
the worst kind of breakup anyone could have would be.....
when 2 breaks up due to circumstances and not cos of fading feelings/affections whicheva word u like.
that's the worse.
took me 1 year plus to get over it
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Welcome to singlehood.
Free beers for u.
EPL started liao. -
maybe u need some time away from each other...
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im still in love with the girl i fell in love with 5 years agoOriginally posted by shinta:the worst kind of breakup anyone could have would be.....
when 2 breaks up due to circumstances and not cos of fading feelings/affections whicheva word u like.
that's the worse.
took me 1 year plus to get over it -
Thanks for ur support yaOriginally posted by starblue:mutual parting, now that's a good news... at least it was quick and painless, was it?? well, my heart goes out to you... all the best for your finding your direction thing. -
erm..erm.. ahem. *clears throat*.. erm..Originally posted by DriftingGuy:Well at least its a mutual breakup and not a one dumps someone for another kind of breakup
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ooh..where should i sign up? any min n miax length of stay required?Originally posted by drx:Welcome to singlehood.
Free beers for u.
EPL started liao. -
she likes to drink tea?Originally posted by coffeeortea:im still in love with the girl i fell in love with 5 years ago -
too late for that now.Originally posted by kikq:maybe u need some time away from each other...