This forum very funni lehz!
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How come hor, everytime got people post relationship problems want to seek solution hor?
Then people sure say move on de... like standard answer like that...
Nabei lah, can more constructive or not? -
Give us your best genric reply for such and we'll rate you. C'mon.
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No wonder Singapore marriage rate going down...cos everybody come read sgforums... then move on...
Can say preserve on or not? -
Standard answer what , what you expect?
some people are automatically like computer , ask you to move on , even when the problem is very small lor. -
Find a thread like you just mentioned above, and hit it with your best shot. We'll tell you how you rate.Originally posted by Ayukat:No wonder Singapore marriage rate going down...cos everybody come read sgforums... then move on...
Can say preserve on or not? -
preserve simi?Originally posted by Ayukat:Can say preserve on or not?
sour plums? -
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Ayukat,
Do you think the marriage is just about ONE person? It takes TWO people to work! Now if 1 party, for some reason, decides he/she wants out due to the other person disappointing him/her repeatedly & making him/her miserable all the time, AND if this party's feelings for that partner have died, then what do you expect us to say?
It would be unrealistic to ask the other partner who refused to wake up during the course of the relationship & the many chances he/she was given, to hang on when he/she realises TOO LATE that the spouse has lost all feelings for them. It only irritates the hell outta the spouse who wants out, & those of us who've been through it, know it only too well.
When you've been hurt to the core, the feelings of love, & hope that the other party will change, metamorphose into anger, disappointment, contempt, etc. The least you can do for them if you love them is to leave them the hell alone to lick their wounds.
It's Not standard answer. In many cases, it's the best solution we can give. Si3 chan2 lan4 da3 is freakin' irritating.
FeowFeowOriginally posted by Ayukat:No wonder Singapore marriage rate going down...cos everybody come read sgforums... then move on...
Can say preserve on or not? -
If they wanted to seek a solution, it means they dun wanna to give up yet right? So DUN TELL THEM TOO. At least, give them proper advice on how to touch the other party.Originally posted by FeowFeow:Ayukat,
Do you think the marriage is just about ONE person? It takes TWO people to work! Now if 1 party, for some reason, decides he/she wants out due to the other person disappointing him/her repeatedly & making him/her miserable all the time, AND if this party's feelings for that partner have died, then what do you expect us to say?
It would be unrealistic to ask the other partner who refused to wake up during the course of the relationship & the many chances he/she was given, to hang on when he/she realises TOO LATE that the spouse has lost all feelings for them. It only irritates the hell outta the spouse who wants out, & those of us who've been through it, know it only too well.
When you've been hurt to the core, the feelings of love, & hope that the other party will change, metamorphose into anger, disappointment, contempt, etc. The least you can do for them if you love them is to leave them the hell alone to lick their wounds.
It's Not standard answer. In many cases, it's the best solution we can give. Si3 chan2 lan4 da3 is freakin' irritating.
FeowFeow
And besides, you're girl, you won't understand. Most of my gal-frenz would tell me, "I don't understand how guy can wait for gal for so long." I guess she was speaking from experience which is her boyfrenz... -
Lol...maybe the solution can be letting go? Love doesn't mean you have to have the other party all the time...it can also mean setting the one you love free to pursue his/her cherished parthOriginally posted by Ayukat:If they wanted to seek a solution, it means they dun wanna to give up yet right? So DUN TELL THEM TOO. At least, give them proper advice on how to touch the other party.
And besides, you're girl, you won't understand. Most of my gal-frenz would tell me, "I don't understand how guy can wait for gal for so long." I guess she was speaking from experience which is her boyfrenz...
There are cases when the girls will appreciate if the guys perservere, but there are cases when the guys will be considered as a lunatic as well -
that is so very trueOriginally posted by FeowFeow:In many cases, it's the best solution we can give. Si3 chan2 lan4 da3 is freakin' irritating.
FeowFeow -
I said b4, I dun think its a solution to give others in a forum, you all should teach them how to win the battle instead of giving up. Its a CLEAR SIGN that they dun want to give up since they came here and type a sh1t load of crap to post.Originally posted by rainee:Lol...maybe the solution can be letting go? Love doesn't mean you have to have the other party all the time...it can also mean setting the one you love free to pursue his/her cherished parth
There are cases when the girls will appreciate if the guys perservere, but there are cases when the guys will be considered as a lunatic as well -
Coz they need someone to wake up their idea.Originally posted by Ayukat:I said b4, I dun think its a solution to give others in a forum, you all should teach them how to win the battle instead of giving up. Its a CLEAR SIGN that they dun want to give up since they came here and type a sh1t load of crap to post.
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I ddnt notice u giving any so called 'constructive' advice .
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How am I supposed to, when I am sinking myself?Originally posted by alexkusu:I ddnt notice u giving any so called 'constructive' advice .
Ya, as if they want to wake up? And besides who are we to judge? Can't we just help them win the battle instead of asking them to give up? I am sure there are many super powderful dating pro around these areas... why can't they pop out and give the advice others want? -
and be irritating..Originally posted by Ayukat:I said b4, I dun think its a solution to give others in a forum, you all should teach them how to win the battle instead of giving up. Its a CLEAR SIGN that they dun want to give up since they came here and type a sh1t load of crap to post. -
sometimes, by not giving up, they made the other party hate them like shyt cos they're so irritating...Originally posted by Ayukat:How am I supposed to, when I am sinking myself?
Ya, as if they want to wake up? And besides who are we to judge? Can't we just help them win the battle instead of asking them to give up? I am sure there are many super powderful dating pro around these areas... why can't they pop out and give the advice others want?
one of my ex kinda stalked me.. at first i tot we could still be frenz, but after the stalkin episode cos he refuse to give up... i have blocked him everywhere.... friendster, msn u name it, i blocked it...
the episode was..... scary... not to mention damn Fucking irritating. -
ppl can be apathetic. its only forums..if they really want real advice, they can visit specialist or professionals right? some ppl just want others to 'confirm' their decisions. Ultimately, ur the master of your own destiny.Originally posted by Ayukat:How am I supposed to, when I am sinking myself?
Ya, as if they want to wake up? And besides who are we to judge? Can't we just help them win the battle instead of asking them to give up? I am sure there are many super powderful dating pro around these areas... why can't they pop out and give the advice others want? -
Why do you care if it gets irritating?
When helping someone, please just try to help only that person, dun tink too much of other people's feeling. The person will give up naturally if he senses something is wrong.
And besides, I do think its alot better if the one you like becomes the one you hate most, so at least you'll willingly give up.
Doesn't the world work like this? When your client asks you to do something, do you question their request? -
Dear Ayukat,
There's such a thing as: RESPONSIBILITY.
To the posters who ask questions & solutions here, we have the responsibility to HELP them. The best help, is NOT necessarily what they wish to hear. But it could actually be the best thing for them to do.
If I know that a poster is highly likely to get his heart broken further by persevering & irritating the girl in the process, why would I want to advise him to go ahead? I'm sure you've heard of the phrase
medicine that is bitter to the taste is good medicine. This may Not be accurate in ALL situations, but when the poster's situation doesn't look good, how can I go against my conscience & tell him, "Yah yah, go ahead, go ahead", whilst knowing deep inside what a woman thinks?
By the way, what we Agony Aunt helpers/posters here post, I believe, is NOT dictated by other posters. Nobody owns the right to another person's speech, so long as sensitive topics or vulgarities have Not been spewed forth. We don't get personal either, & the advices given are mostly from experience. Seriously, there's Nothing wrong with that.
FeowFeowOriginally posted by Ayukat:I said b4, I dun think its a solution to give others in a forum, you all should teach them how to win the battle instead of giving up. Its a CLEAR SIGN that they dun want to give up since they came here and type a sh1t load of crap to post. -
Of course.Originally posted by Ayukat:Why do you care if it gets irritating?
When helping someone, please just try to help only that person, dun tink too much of other people's feeling. The person will give up naturally if he senses something is wrong.
And besides, I do think its alot better if the one you like becomes the one you hate most, so at least you'll willingly give up.
Doesn't the world work like this? When your client asks you to do something, do you question their request?
Taking off my shoes and yoodling in the conference room while flapping my hands is not exactly in my job description, you know. -
There is no such thing as responsibility on the net.Originally posted by FeowFeow:Dear Ayukat,
There's such a thing as: RESPONSIBILITY.
To the posters who ask questions & solutions here, we have the responsibility to HELP them. The best help, is NOT necessarily what they wish to hear. But it could actually be the best thing for them to do.
If I know that a poster is highly likely to get his heart broken further by persevering & irritating the girl in the process, why would I want to advise him to go ahead? I'm sure you've heard of the phrase medicine that is bitter to the taste is good medicine. This may Not be accurate in ALL situations, but when the poster's situation doesn't look good, how can I go against my conscience & tell him, "Yah yah, go ahead, go ahead", whilst knowing deep inside what a woman thinks?
By the way, what we Agony Aunt helpers/posters here post, I believe, is NOT dictated by other posters. Nobody owns the right to another person's speech, so long as sensitive topics or vulgarities have Not been spewed forth. We don't get personal either, & the advices given are mostly from experience. Seriously, there's Nothing wrong with that.
FeowFeow -
ask them to see professional councillors lah ... betterOriginally posted by Ayukat:I said b4, I dun think its a solution to give others in a forum, you all should teach them how to win the battle instead of giving up. Its a CLEAR SIGN that they dun want to give up since they came here and type a sh1t load of crap to post.
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WRONG!Originally posted by sgboy2004:ask them to see professional councillors lah ... better
It should be ask them to seek professional dating advicer to make sure they really win. -
Originally posted by Ayukat:There is no such thing as responsibility on the net.
You yourself do not know the meaning of giving advice on the Net, so stop criticising others