Erase, Eliminate, Empty & Evacuate
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I have a problem in attempting to forget a girl which I've known and loved for about 5-6 years. I've never proposed to her before, hence she didn't know my intention. We've parted for about a year and I've hardly heard from her ever since. My feelings continued to decline over that period of time, but just recently, I met her online through MSN...
She appeared distant while the feelings keep coming back to me... Is there anything that I can do to forget about her?
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time to get on with life dude!
dwelling on the past is like a dream that'll never come true and its worse than nightmare come true. -
I suppose so, but everytime I see her, there will be this sense of regret inside of me... I still dunno what is so special about her that keeps me reminded of her over and over again. It was not easy forgetting her, eventually I almost did it, then comes the time where I see her again...Originally posted by mach10:time to get on with life dude!
dwelling on the past is like a dream that'll never come true and its worse than nightmare come true. -
Forgetting someone takes time, the longer you've known her, the longer it takes.
Perhaps try engaging yourself in some activities, or set yourself some medium-term targets to keep yourself focused on other things.
I once read somewhere that if you keep reminding yourself to forget, you won't be able to do so since you have to remember to forget, which is in itself an irony.
Rather, let time run its course. Sooner or later, she will be in your subconcious.
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Yeah, I see your point... sigh... everytime I see her is like once in a year, and this sick and painful thing will return again... should I ignore her from now on?Originally posted by ^spidee^:Forgetting someone takes time, the longer you've known her, the longer it takes.
Perhaps try engaging yourself in some activities, or set yourself some medium-term targets to keep yourself focused on other things.
I once read somewhere that if you keep reminding yourself to forget, you won't be able to do so since you have to remember to forget, which is in itself an irony.
Rather, let time run its course. Sooner or later, she will be in your subconcious. -
Tell her ur feelings. Just tell her she many not want to hear it but u just want her to know. It'll help u bring closure to this ordeal. Who knows, she may reciprocate your feelings.
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Have you considered bringing the friendship onto the next level? You never made the move, how would she know? Actually, I'm in a somewhat similar situation myself, but I know it's impossible, so I give up without even trying. What's your excuse?Originally posted by renorenal:Yeah, I see your point... sigh... everytime I see her is like once in a year, and this sick and painful thing will return again... should I ignore her from now on? -
In reality it is impossible... she is now in UK, and I am in Malaysia, we are so far apart. The reason for her breaking up with her ex was that she was in Malaysia last time and her ex was in Australia. Prior to leaving, the guy told her that he will love her no matter what and they profess their feelings to each other so deeply. But one week into the relationship, the girl called him and told him that LDR is impossible and that she has lost feelings for him. The ex cried and told her that he will settle this with her when he comes back, but she never wanted or waited...Originally posted by alexkusu:Tell her ur feelings. Just tell her she many not want to hear it but u just want her to know. It'll help u bring closure to this ordeal. Who knows, she may reciprocate your feelings.
I fear the same thing will happen, especially there is another guy who liked her since both of them were in Malaysia, who is also there with her now in UK... -
i meant...tellin her ur feelings. That is possible rite? It will help u bring closure uc? For relationship part.. what will be will be.Originally posted by renorenal:In reality it is impossible... she is now in UK, and I am in Malaysia, we are so far apart. The reason for her breaking up with her ex was that she was in Malaysia last time and her ex was in Australia. Prior to leaving, the guy told her that he will love her no matter what and they profess their feelings to each other so deeply. But one week into the relationship, the girl called him and told him that LDR is impossible and that she has lost feelings for him. The ex cried and told her that he will settle this with her when he comes back, but she never wanted or waited...
I fear the same thing will happen, especially there is another guy who liked her since both of them were in Malaysia, who is also there with her now in UK... -
I did told her once a long while ago, 6 days into knowing her, but that time she had a boyfriend... I just told her like this...Originally posted by alexkusu:i meant...tellin her ur feelings. That is possible rite? It will help u bring closure uc? For relationship part.. what will be will be.
Throughout these 6 days, I've begun to like you...
and then she started to become silent and squat down and said nothing until I pestered her to... that's how I knew about her boyfriend...
She hinted several signs such as...
-wanna concentrate first in her studies
-wanna wait until the right person comes to cure her sadness
-called me friend (sigh - sucks) -
Is she coming back to Malaysia or migrating for good? From what happened between her ex and herself, she seems to need someone by her side physically.
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people feelings can change over time. Ask urself, what have u got to lose by telling her ur feelings tis time?Originally posted by renorenal:I did told her once a long while ago, 6 days into knowing her, but that time she had a boyfriend... I just told her like this...
Throughout these 6 days, I've begun to like you...
and then she started to become silent and squat down and said nothing until I pestered her to... that's how I knew about her boyfriend...
She hinted several signs such as...
-wanna concentrate first in her studies
-wanna wait until the right person comes to cure her sadness
-called me friend (sigh - sucks) -
Friendship is perhaps one...Originally posted by alexkusu:people feelings can change over time. Ask urself, what have u got to lose by telling her ur feelings tis time? -
think bout what u can possibly gain..Originally posted by renorenal:Friendship is perhaps one...
Sum gals tell me their feelings, but it dosent spoil the friendship I have with them and vice versa.... -
Hmmm... I guess that will be one way of ending my agony... but I fear that after confessing my feelings to her, I might still keep thinking of her even if she says no...Originally posted by alexkusu:think bout what u can possibly gain..
Sum gals tell me their feelings, but it dosent spoil the friendship I have with them and vice versa....
Anywayz, I shall give it a try... it may not be very easy... of all the things, I think this is harder than any thing in the world...
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Yalor.. then u can say to urself "I told her my feelings, its up to her to reciprocate, i can move on with my life now"...
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At least you dare to try. Oh well, nothing ventured, nothing gained. All the best!Originally posted by renorenal:Hmmm... I guess that will be one way of ending my agony... but I fear that after confessing my feelings to her, I might still keep thinking of her even if she says no...
Anywayz, I shall give it a try... it may not be very easy... of all the things, I think this is harder than any thing in the world... -
do yourself a favour. if you want to forget her, STOP MSNING HER!!!!!
how can you hope to forget someone when you are still in touch with her? you are just letting yourself sink right in again. why do you want to do that for?
sort out your thoughts and know what you really want. if you want to forget her, stop contacting her for christ's sake. -
She added me in MSN (first time)... not my fault...Originally posted by starblue:do yourself a favour. if you want to forget her, STOP MSNING HER!!!!!
how can you hope to forget someone when you are still in touch with her? you are just letting yourself sink right in again. why do you want to do that for?
sort out your thoughts and know what you really want. if you want to forget her, stop contacting her for christ's sake. -
SighOriginally posted by renorenal:She added me in MSN (first time)... not my fault... -
"Guys once in love...can never find enough reason to let go
Gals once out of love...can never find enough reason to return"
Hmm...perhaps this saying is true after all -
This is so very true... experienced it though it may be a few times, but it somehow lets you generalize things..Originally posted by Xiao Jun:"Guys once in love...can never find enough reason to let go
Gals once out of love...can never find enough reason to return"
Hmm...perhaps this saying is true after all -
Well, I have been thru this before. I was secretly in love with a guy secretly for nearly 2 years before I confessed to him. I guess the confession helped me to get over him faster because at least I know where I would always stand when it comes to him. His answer lets me know that we would always be close frens and no more than that. So I no longer harbor any hope and slowly I learn to let go. And then I met someone who is much better than him, and the rest is history
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Gals can be truly devoted and steadfast in a relationship...but once we stopped loving uÂ…Originally posted by renorenal:This is so very true... experienced it though it may be a few times, but it somehow lets you generalize things..
ThatÂ’s when nothing can ever make us come back -
Originally posted by rainee:
Wow!
Well, I have been thru this before. I was secretly in love with a guy secretly for nearly 2 years before I confessed to him. I guess the confession helped me to get over him faster because at least I know where I would always stand when it comes to him. His answer lets me know that we would always be close frens and no more than that. So I no longer harbor any hope and slowly I learn to let go. And then I met someone who is much better than him, and the rest is history