my difficult friend
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have you come across a friend who like to talk loud loud??
I have a friend who always quarrel with the husband even in front of her friends or in the public, or in the car. She is very straight forward person, talk very loud and at time i feel embarass by her. Being a good friend to her and always being together most of the time, i always see them quarrel in front of me and i feel very uneasy. how to tell her (in a nice way and not to embarass her) not to do that in front of me? cos the situation can even cause everyone to keep quiet and silence....it is really uneasy..
another problem is, recently i find that she is impatient talking to me, like very 'gan chiong', never let me finish my sentence and get the whole meaning out of it and caused a lot of misunderstand which i am unhappy with. cos she misunderstand my meaning and in the end we are like arguing like...'NO i mean this.....before i can finish' and she will say...'yeah lor......etc etc ......on the topic for so long, but still don get what i mean.
How to tackle this kind of impatient friend???
She is quite a nice friend just that she is quite quick temper and at time misunderstand my meaning cos i dont have the chance to finish my sentences ...and is most of the time....
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she need a reality check .. give her ur temper when u feel like it .. show her tat she shld nt take u for granted .. or her husband for tat matter .. if this continues .. its she whom will be spoilt .. being a woman of her age .. i cannot believe tat she behaves like a tat .. after going through marriage n at least 20yrs of life she still couldnt mature ?? well .. she might be a good fren .. but i guess u hav already done ur part as a good fren as well .. or u might wan to try the soft method .. talk to her 1 on 1 .. on a relatively easy mood ... knock some sense into her .. tell her to reflect on her behaviour.. n when she tries to interrupt .. u make it a pt to remind her tat she is interrupting u .. since she is ur gd fren .. i believe tat 2 of u shld b able to communicate more effectively .. so much tat u can pt to her her bad pts n persuade her to change for the better .. if she show u black face .. or typical spoilt brat attitude .. i reckon she isnt quite a gd fren u said to be .. peace
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[quote]Originally posted by SingKoala:
have you come across a friend who like to talk loud loud??
I have a friend who always quarrel with the husband even in front of her friends or in the public, or in the car.
Wouldn't she hurt the man's ego? Throw his face...
i always see them quarrel in front of me and i feel very uneasy.
x 2.
how to tell her (in a nice way and not to embarass her) not to do that in front of me? cos the situation can even cause everyone to keep quiet and silence....it is really uneasy..
Just tell her everyone feels really uneasy. Not only it gives others a bad impression of her, its throws her husband's face as well. Arguments like this should be kept behind closed doors and not infront of everybody (including the kids).
another problem is, recently i find that she is impatient talking to me, like very 'gan chiong',
Just wondering...is she a cantonese?
She is quite a nice friend just that she is quite quick temper and at time misunderstand my meaning cos i dont have the chance to finish my sentences ...and is most of the time....
Make your stand. Just say "Listen to me first!" Cannot be too soft on her, she won't buy it. -
quite a nice friend?? haha i doubt it myselfOriginally posted by SingKoala:have you come across a friend who like to talk loud loud??
I have a friend who always quarrel with the husband even in front of her friends or in the public, or in the car. She is very straight forward person, talk very loud and at time i feel embarass by her. Being a good friend to her and always being together most of the time, i always see them quarrel in front of me and i feel very uneasy. how to tell her (in a nice way and not to embarass her) not to do that in front of me? cos the situation can even cause everyone to keep quiet and silence....it is really uneasy..
another problem is, recently i find that she is impatient talking to me, like very 'gan chiong', never let me finish my sentence and get the whole meaning out of it and caused a lot of misunderstand which i am unhappy with. cos she misunderstand my meaning and in the end we are like arguing like...'NO i mean this.....before i can finish' and she will say...'yeah lor......etc etc ......on the topic for so long, but still don get what i mean.
How to tackle this kind of impatient friend???
She is quite a nice friend just that she is quite quick temper and at time misunderstand my meaning cos i dont have the chance to finish my sentences ...and is most of the time....
sounds she is not a very respectful person to me... to scold pple in the public and not letting u finishing your sentences soudns she does not respect anyone .. but again i maybe wrong lol
anyway here is my way to ahndle these pple.. and i nor sure if it help u
As long she is not extremely selfish it may help u.
1. show genuine enthusiasm to her in a sense of making her feel a million bucks.. In turn she show apprecation of your making feel so comfortable and good. If u two keep agruing everytime u two talk, i pretty sure it will eat anway her self esstem and the bond between u.
2. show respect -- so obvious lol
3. Be supportive - when she makes mistakes let her kloow everyone makes mistakes and she shoudln't be hard on herself.
4. Let her know u appreaciate her - its a amazing mind game... as a saying one nice word in the bank is worth a hundred after the fact.
5. allow her to give u - well this is something i note.... ppel tend to like us if we do nice things for them but if a person actually like u more after he/she does something for u. U see.... pple dun things for pple they dun like... the chances she does something for u means she like u. So once u take and appreaciate her effort there is a sense of respect for u
once u done it she will respect u more and i guess u change her a bit lol once she respect u
but again if u are lazy to change her.. maybe a direct approach will be best..
for husband thingy...just said u dun like it but in a nice way.. maybe like
" hi ABC, i respect u alot and u had being a role model for me and i am sure you and yr huasband are a loving couple, but i WANT to let u know you scolding or quarreling with your husband seems offensive to me and embrassing.
well she can said she is sorrie or defend herself
i put my bet on her defending lol
if she said sorry.. good stuff!!!
if not ... well she probably said things u are too sensitive or the fcat her husband is an asshole lol.. if she said none of yr business.. i probably leave it as this statement basicalyy disregard u as a friend.
One must remember in life there are good and bad friends.. bad friends are never worth keeping even how much benefit they will give u.. cos they eat u away like diseases
Just dun argue abck.. then said smile and said i undertsand yr reason is good but i must say its offensive to me." and end of story.
if she keep doing that keep using that method.
teh same goes for her not letting u finishing yr statement.. Just tell her u dun like it and see her reaction.
Never argue with her but just show her respect and continue on normal talking..after a while that might tone her down lol
Good luck! -
i have a former colleague who is unhappy 99% of the time. she is rude to all living things.
frankly i dont know how to handle such type of people. they should go to hell!!! -
Originally posted by dragg:
i have a former colleague who is unhappy 99% of the time. she is rude to all living things.
frankly i dont know how to handle such type of people. they should go to hell!!!
Hahaha...I understand. I have a case similar to yours, just that she is my boyfriend's sister. She is pretty but is the most grouchy & rude person I've ever seen. Mei(2) You(3) Ren(2) Yuan(2). I pity her boyfriend. Better keep a distance from such people else they bite.
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i deem those person as dao...Originally posted by dunamis:Hahaha...I understand. I have a case similar to yours, just that she is my boyfriend's sister. She is pretty but is the most grouchy & rude person I've ever seen. Mei(2) You(3) Ren(2) Yuan(2). I pity her boyfriend. Better keep a distance from such people else they bite -
Hahaha...I understand. I have a case similar to yours, just that she is my boyfriend's sister. She is pretty but is the most grouchy & rude person I've ever seen. Mei(2) You(3) Ren(2) Yuan(2). I pity her boyfriend. Better keep a distance from such people else they bite.
hahaha, the one i knew is fat ugly and very short. she reminds me of a billard table leg.