Originally posted by Bear:
Well most of you mention that r/s or commitment cultivates love...
but most of the time, why does r/s turn sour with just attraction from another guy/girl?? and have break-ups in r/s?? I'm not accusing all of you.. but there are people who say that their r/s grew plain and uneventful after a period of time, and you start looking for other boats... and I believe there are some of you who 'zhao sai' and jump onto another boat right??
So does r/s or commitment really cultivates love???
To begin with, my views on your TOPIC... DEPENDS... In MOST cases I BELIEVE would be a LOVE sparks off a r/s... Followed by the r/s cultivating LOVE..... Of course, there'll be exceptions whereby people just start off a r/s for the sake of starting one or whatsoever reason(s).... And having a love SPARKS off a r/s doesn't naturally imply that the r/s would go uphill...? It can also degrade with time after the spark off OR found to be of BOREDOM or NON-SATISFACTION.....
In THIS POST of yours, you talk about WEAKENING in r/s; INTERVENTION from a 3rd party & also BREAK UP of r/s....
To START off to your queries, I would like to EMPHASIZE that LOVE is NOT the ONLY thing that EXIST in a r/s. To MOST, it is probably the MAIN INGREDIENT... So as a matter of CONVENIENCE, people often just link LOVE with a r/s and FORGOT about the other 'smaller' make ups of it....
Having see r/s grow STRONGER with time... LOVE cultivated with SO MUCH CARE and CONCERN... So much UNDERSTANDING.... YET... It still doesn't guarantee a MAKE UP - that is... With LOVE, the r/s would go on....
Because of other matters that would come into the picture.... Like $$$... Mutual achievements..? Mutual benefits...? Mutual agreements... Tolerance and TRUE UNDERSTANDING.... (I can agree with the fact that some people are just so materialistic, but doesn't mean I can tolerant that?).... Human EGOs... Your OWN OBJECTIVE(s) in life... Your OWN DESIRE(s) in life..... CONTRADICTIONS with other BELIEF(s) or r/s in your life....
A relationship is NOT like making a sandwich... Just 2 slice of bread put together and that's it... It can call it a sandwich... You CAN STILL call them 2 slices of bread INDIVIDUALLY.... Are you suppose to ALLOW FREEDOM in a r/s...? Or should you ask for COMMITMENT...? DO YOU HAVE A COMMON BELIEF in the r/s...? OF HOW the r/s should be...? Would the belief CHANGE...? For you...? For the other party...? As time ticks on....
I BELIEVE NOTHING's PERFECT in this world... NOT even a r/s.... The MANY (little?) things that are not accomplished in a r/s.... Nay... They're not important... (for now?) That's HOW TIME can lay an UNTOUCHED and UNKNOWN TRAP down its path.... How IMPORTANT are the things NOT accomplished...? Not SATISFIED...? Would their VALUE CHANGE in time to come?
Back to Bear's POST... 3 SCENERIOs...
1. MANY (little?) things contributing to the WEAKENING of the r/s... Just a matter of time before the r/s falls apart (YES... Usually you can SENSE it...).... External factors just speed up the reaction like catalyst... If NOTHING is done to RECOVER the r/s..... This would be what I call a 'vulnerable window'.... A TIME ZONE whereby a r/s opens itself OR is HIGHLY PROMPT to ATTACKs....
2. EXTERNAL FACTORs... Things that you've never been able to achieve from your r/s... Never promised.. WORSE STILL, 'promised' that you'll never get...(Or so you hold the belief...) Given the OPPORTUNITY would you GRAB it...? VERY RISKY business...? Like what the topical humans would say... "Nothing venture, nothing gain..?"
3. CHANGING MAN... With the EXISTENCE of TIME it also sort of 'promises' the CHANGING of MAN.... For if NOTHING changes with reference with TIME, then TIME FRAME won't EXIST.... Neither would TIME.... With the CHANGING of 'things' come the CHANGING of other things related to them... Just like a BIG BIOCHEMICAL REACTION.... In the end... MAN is AFFECTED... On the SURFACE, EITHER you CHANGE or you don't change...? Underneath the surface... Your EQUILIBRIUM is SHIFTED... Till the NEXT TEST come along.... The NEXT wave... Whatever.... When one party (or BOTH) CHANGE.... A r/s may hold a NEW MEANING.... It can be insignificant... It CAN also give a WHOLE NEW MEANING to the r/s.... Well... Only TIME will tell...?
FINALLY.... Coming to the end of my post... My CONCLUSIVE WORDS would be... We're in a NEW CENTURY... New MILLENIUM.... In the beginning NOBODY told you that LOVE is EVERYTHING in a r/s (or so you believe?).... What you BELIEVE might NOT be the SAME as your partner(s) about the r/s..... I guess r/s nowadays no longer weigh so much on LOVE like they used to...? <- And no need to cry over that..? It's just a CHANGE...? I never see you cry when they started to build MRT in Singapore...?
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In LIGHT I shall FEAR NOT. FOR what I AM is CUT so DEEP inside of ME.
I LIVE my FLESH and SOUL ONLY to BLEED for the OTHERS.
FEAR ME NOT. FOR I AM YOUR 'MASTER'. GIVE YOU STRENGTH. FOR YOU ARE MY 'ENEMY'.
DEVIL PHRASE I
I have no 'friends' nor 'family'.
I hold no past and see not future...
These are just samples of illusions....
I don't exist, but I shall live ETERNITY..... DEVIL PHRASE II
ße COOL, NOT s¢rr¥....
