A possessive guy at heart.
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I know i'm a very possessive and short-tempered guy, but i tried to control myself with regards to my girlfriend, but sometimes, i really cannot control myself.
Incident:
We were eating together in Macdonalds when my girlfriend were talking to this other guy (who used to fancy her) about that guy's crush, in front of me. The problem is, she was having a headache before, and wasn't even responsive to me. Yet she talked to him like nothing happened to her. Then she didn't even tell me who that guy likes. I don't really care who he likes, but the point is, she refuses to tell me. We made a promise not to keep anything from one another. If she cannot tell me, at least don't wave it in front of me and yet keep me out of reach.
The problem is, she have told me far more personal and darker things than this stupid little thing in the past. I'm starting to have doubts. I know she still loves me and i really love her, but i'm starting to have doubts about how she really feels..
And i know i sound childish and a MCP. So no need for that. -
ok so?
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I realised i forgot to mention it in my post. I'll just reply it here to gain a post count.
Maybe someone here could give some advice as to what i should do, to improve my temper etc. -
Hmm, it's hard to ask you not to stop thinking or think of other stuff in the case. Even though you tried to remain ignorant but in your heart you still dying to know everything right?Originally posted by binarynwitz:I realised i forgot to mention it in my post. I'll just reply it here to gain a post count.
Maybe someone here could give some advice as to what i should do, to improve my temper etc.
One advise I suggest is to learn to understand your girlfriend, in her shoes. Think of how it feels when someone who loves you keeps probing you on everything, keeping tabs on your every movement. Go washroom need to report like it's in the army. It doesn't feel good and feels there is a lack of trust right?
In the beginning it will be hard, but it's a key step in building a good relationship. Trust is important. No one will entrust their hearts and lives to a person who doesn't trust them. So, think more before flaring up. Harsh words don't need effort to throw out but it does takes alot of effort to re-piece everything you both have build once the damage is done. There are millions of ways to show her that you care without using provocative words and anger to convey your love to her.
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agreed.trust is v impt in the r/s.u gotta trust ur gf.at least she doesn't flirt wif others in front of ya..Originally posted by NekoRin:Hmm, it's hard to ask you not to stop thinking or think of other stuff in the case. Even though you tried to remain ignorant but in your heart you still dying to know everything right?
One advise I suggest is to learn to understand your girlfriend, in her shoes. Think of how it feels when someone who loves you keeps probing you on everything, keeping tabs on your every movement. Go washroom need to report like it's in the army. It doesn't feel good and feels there is a lack of trust right?
In the beginning it will be hard, but it's a key step in building a good relationship. Trust is important. No one will entrust their hearts and lives to a person who doesn't trust them. So, think more before flaring up. Harsh words don't need effort to throw out but it does takes alot of effort to re-piece everything you both have build once the damage is done. There are millions of ways to show her that you care without using provocative words and anger to convey your love to her. 
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At least it shows that you care about her and want to know more about her, but just try to lay off. Its nice to know that someone really cares, but not until to the point where he/she is breathing down ur neck and squeezing every little detail out. She might be doing this out of jealousy, did you forget her birthday or something? haha, so for now relax dood, watch and see for awhile if its keeps up then slowly get her to tell you more about that guy.
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You are 15? How long have you been together with your gf?Originally posted by binarynwitz:I know i'm a very possessive and short-tempered guy, but i tried to control myself with regards to my girlfriend, but sometimes, i really cannot control myself.
Incident:
We were eating together in Macdonalds when my girlfriend were talking to this other guy (who used to fancy her) about that guy's crush, in front of me. The problem is, she was having a headache before, and wasn't even responsive to me. Yet she talked to him like nothing happened to her. Then she didn't even tell me who that guy likes. I don't really care who he likes, but the point is, she refuses to tell me. We made a promise not to keep anything from one another. If she cannot tell me, at least don't wave it in front of me and yet keep me out of reach.
The problem is, she have told me far more personal and darker things than this stupid little thing in the past. I'm starting to have doubts. I know she still loves me and i really love her, but i'm starting to have doubts about how she really feels..
And i know i sound childish and a MCP. So no need for that. -
that's young!Originally posted by Devil1976:You are 15? How long have you been together with your gf?
Cheers -
Because she is respecting that person's privacy. What's wrong with that?????Originally posted by binarynwitz:I know i'm a very possessive and short-tempered guy, but i tried to control myself with regards to my girlfriend, but sometimes, i really cannot control myself.
Incident:
We were eating together in Macdonalds when my girlfriend were talking to this other guy (who used to fancy her) about that guy's crush, in front of me. The problem is, she was having a headache before, and wasn't even responsive to me. Yet she talked to him like nothing happened to her. Then she didn't even tell me who that guy likes. I don't really care who he likes, but the point is, she refuses to tell me. We made a promise not to keep anything from one another. If she cannot tell me, at least don't wave it in front of me and yet keep me out of reach.
The problem is, she have told me far more personal and darker things than this stupid little thing in the past. I'm starting to have doubts. I know she still loves me and i really love her, but i'm starting to have doubts about how she really feels..
And i know i sound childish and a MCP. So no need for that. -
is normal and try not to think too much.Originally posted by binarynwitz:I know i'm a very possessive and short-tempered guy, but i tried to control myself with regards to my girlfriend, but sometimes, i really cannot control myself.
Incident:
We were eating together in Macdonalds when my girlfriend were talking to this other guy (who used to fancy her) about that guy's crush, in front of me. The problem is, she was having a headache before, and wasn't even responsive to me. Yet she talked to him like nothing happened to her. Then she didn't even tell me who that guy likes. I don't really care who he likes, but the point is, she refuses to tell me. We made a promise not to keep anything from one another. If she cannot tell me, at least don't wave it in front of me and yet keep me out of reach.
The problem is, she have told me far more personal and darker things than this stupid little thing in the past. I'm starting to have doubts. I know she still loves me and i really love her, but i'm starting to have doubts about how she really feels..
And i know i sound childish and a MCP. So no need for that.
sometimes lovers need a breathing space.
Since she is not in love with the guy, she can crap to him alot. -
A year.Originally posted by Devil1976:You are 15? How long have you been together with your gf?
And thanks, everyone. I pretty much figured out what you guys said on my own, being a counsellor myself. Thanks to all who responded. -
if it's a secret between her and her fren, then y muz she let u know?
put urself in her shoes. If u and ur buddy has a secret and u promised not to tell, will u tell her?
My buddy used to tell her bf my secrets. That really annoyed me. -
Originally posted by binarynwitz:I know i'm a very possessive and short-tempered guy, but i tried to control myself with regards to my girlfriend, but sometimes, i really cannot control myself.
Incident:
We were eating together in Macdonalds when my girlfriend were talking to this other guy (who used to fancy her) about that guy's crush, in front of me. The problem is, she was having a headache before, and wasn't even responsive to me. Yet she talked to him like nothing happened to her. Then she didn't even tell me who that guy likes. I don't really care who he likes, but the point is, she refuses to tell me. We made a promise not to keep anything from one another. If she cannot tell me, at least don't wave it in front of me and yet keep me out of reach.
The problem is, she have told me far more personal and darker things than this stupid little thing in the past. I'm starting to have doubts. I know she still loves me and i really love her, but i'm starting to have doubts about how she really feels..
And i know i sound childish and a MCP. So no need for that.
Possessiveness usually cannot be deflected by logics, that's is to say that the poison stirs in emotions that cannot be remove, or rather, with much difficulty. I believe that people who have possessive tendency (which also means petty jealousy), can only reduce it to a certain extend because MCP has this gnawing insecurity and love=possession-like attitude and justify them psychologically as love for the other person.
In the end, from thoughts, it sews into habit and personality.
They may not be entirely wrong, but definitely, there are much healthier way to lead a relationship. And 'healthy' living for the relationship could be the key to life and death of the BGR.
Cheers -
gee,,u not only possessive n control freak..u arrogant as well..n so young sum more.."COUNSELLOR"...Originally posted by binarynwitz:A year.
And thanks, everyone. I pretty much figured out what you guys said on my own, being a counsellor myself. Thanks to all who responded. -
btw wads a MCP ?
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some sort of pig.Originally posted by ETboy:btw wads a MCP ? -
Sorry, but somehow I failed to see much arrogance in that statement he made. Being a 'counsellor' has got not much to do with age...Originally posted by megatron:gee,,u not only possessive n control freak..u arrogant as well..n so young sum more.."COUNSELLOR"... -
If this type of trivial matter is the only secret she's keeping from you, consider yourself lucky LOL
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Male Chauvinist Pig (Da Nan Ren Zhu Yi)Originally posted by ETboy:btw wads a MCP ?
or if you want~~
Microsoft Certified Professional
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Give them freedom , they might just forget about you.
Control too much , they wanna break free.
In moderation , they say you too good , let you 'go'. (most likely find someone else)
If you're being stable in your BGR , the passion would be lost and girls look for that ... that silly sense of thrill they got when their BGR just started...
If you're too unpredictable , it might be spicy , but , they might just get sick of the feeling that their feelings are being toyed...
don't get into BGR .... (yet)