teary miyuki------- sorrowful world
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Hi all,
I need some advice on this. My story goes like thisÂ…..
I have try in the past to get know a particular gal, she is the sort with unusual form of character. What I mean is that she is the hard hearted kind of girl I foundÂ…Â….No matter how I conveyed to her the care and concern extraordinarily always seem that she do not know fully of my actions or onli know about 50% that wat I am doing for her.
I have a principle which I think it is stupid. I do not want to harbor any motives for doing her care although there is one in the first place I admit. But i do not always wan to high light wat I AM DOING IS FOR HER. BTW this is the 2nd year I am waiting hopefully she will be touchedÂ…. To share some background, she did not have relationship b4 and do not wan one currently. This I know, that y I patiently lie in wait. All sort of things I done for her in preparations for her forthcoming birthday. The advice I sought from u all is that should I give all this presents to her knowing that I will kanna rejected once againÂ… it is the present I store and delayed until her birthdayÂ…..eg one for valentine one for Christmas and etcÂ…Â…Â…sadly I failed to give. I read the board and realize it is a good board for lost souls like me.
Should I give up at this point? And should I celebrate for her?
tks -
Happy waiting.
This is my 6th year waiting. -
Do you really want to give up?
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hmm...how she feel about you?
not good i guess? -
How low can u go?
Wheres ur dignity?show me ur pittances -
why is the forum flooded by people waiting for a girl..
the girl that is meant to be with u forever won't make u wait..not a single minute.. -
ask urself is she really the one? cannot wait too long cos u jz wasting ur time n chances to be with better ones... sometimes its jz not worth it... probably u should make a final round of courtship then ask her the question then leave if rejected...
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Originally posted by Patrik:Happy waiting.
This is my 6th year waiting.
Hate to say this but the years-waiter are usually those waiting because there isn't any alternative ship in sight for them to pursue, thus they simply wait for the sake of waiting.
In fact, they ain't waiting.
It seemed that 'not actively pursuing another partner' has become the definition of wait.
The more years you 'wait', than more 'devoted' you seemed.
Rubbish.
What is the end result you desire?
To be with that particular someone you desire despite the length of time?
If he/she were to accept you, he/she would probably accepted you LONG AGO.
Why is there a need for a lengthy wait? (Calculated wait is NOT aimlessly, lengthy and meaningless wait)
I know of this man who began chasing my friend's mum before she was married, in marriage and after divorce... and still chasing. Finally after eight freaking years, she finally accepted him.
She accepted NOT because of Love.
But because she didn't have much of a choice - she married to security.
P.S: Pursue a relationship that truly meant to be yours and in turn, yours to be proud of.
Cheers -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
Hate to say this but the years-waiter are usually those waiting because there isn't any alternative ship in sight for them to pursue, thus they simply wait for the sake of waiting.
In fact, they ain't waiting.
It seemed that 'not actively pursuing another partner' has become the definition of wait.
The more years you 'wait', than more 'devoted' you seemed.
Rubbish.
What is the end result you desire?
To be with that particular someone you desire despite the length of time?
If he/she were to accept you, he/she would probably accepted you LONG AGO.
Why is there a need for a lengthy wait? (Calculated wait is NOT aimlessly, lengthy and meaningless wait)
I know of this man who began chasing my friend's mum before she was married, in marriage and after divorce... and still chasing. Finally after eight freaking years, she finally accepted him.
She accepted NOT because of Love.
But because she didn't have much of a choice - [b]she married to security.
P.S: Pursue a relationship that truly meant to be yours and in turn, yours to be proud of.
Cheers
[/b]
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my goodness, this is the classic example of the curse of the 'one-itis'!Originally posted by Miyuki481:Hi all,
I need some advice on this. My story goes like thisÂ…..
I have try in the past to get know a particular gal, she is the sort with unusual form of character. What I mean is that she is the hard hearted kind of girl I foundÂ…Â….No matter how I conveyed to her the care and concern extraordinarily always seem that she do not know fully of my actions or onli know about 50% that wat I am doing for her.
I have a principle which I think it is stupid. I do not want to harbor any motives for doing her care although there is one in the first place I admit. But i do not always wan to high light wat I AM DOING IS FOR HER. BTW this is the 2nd year I am waiting hopefully she will be touchedÂ…. To share some background, she did not have relationship b4 and do not wan one currently. This I know, that y I patiently lie in wait. All sort of things I done for her in preparations for her forthcoming birthday. The advice I sought from u all is that should I give all this presents to her knowing that I will kanna rejected once againÂ… it is the present I store and delayed until her birthdayÂ…..eg one for valentine one for Christmas and etcÂ…Â…Â…sadly I failed to give. I read the board and realize it is a good board for lost souls like me.
Should I give up at this point? And should I celebrate for her?
tks
You are not being admirable doing all that for her. What seems very nice in movies nvr works in real life.
Get over her, Be a REAL man and move on. -
1st point: do not supplicate a girl with gifts, drinks, food unless she is already yours, and even then, do it to reward her. girls do not respect guys who supplicate, contrary to popular belief.
The advice I sought from u all is that should I give all this presents to her knowing that I will kanna rejected once againÂ… it is the present I store and delayed until her birthdayÂ…..eg one for valentine one for Christmas and etcÂ…Â…Â…sadly I failed to give.
2nd point: do not be such a sucker by doing so much for her. by doing this, you lower your value while increasing hers due to the fact that you lowered yours because of her. just screw it and dun do anything. and at this point, u basically lost already, anything else u do is just a waste of time, resources and effort.
No matter how I conveyed to her the care and concern extraordinarily always seem that she do not know fully of my actions or onli know about 50% that wat I am doing for her.
3rd point: u waited. u did not make yourself seem more interesting, attractive, intriguing, smarter or showed her that u have value during this time nor did u build enough rapport with her for her to be 'soft hearted' to u.
To share some background, she did not have relationship b4 and do not wan one currently. This I know, that y I patiently lie in wait.
instead, u did all those things to 'serve' her and lowered your value all the time.
give up. do not celebrate with her. pull out completely, give her 0% attention now. its just a waste of your time, unless its your hobby to be humiliated/rejected.
The cure for 'one-itis' is to go and have sex with a dozen (or two) girls and then come back and see if this flower is so special afterall. -
Originally posted by Yunhaier:
this man is so freaking dumb. a woman who doesnt love him married him. so, he is just bringing pain to her while he is enjoying having sex with her.
I know of this man who began chasing my friend's mum before she was married, in marriage and after divorce... and still chasing. Finally after eight freaking years, she finally accepted him.
She accepted NOT because of Love.
But because she didn't have much of a choice - [b]she married to security.
P.S: Pursue a relationship that truly meant to be yours and in turn, yours to be proud of.
Cheers
[/b]
sex for security.
very pitiful. -
well.Originally posted by Ristar:this man is so freaking dumb. a woman who doesnt love him married him. so, he is just bringing pain to her while he is enjoying having sex with her.
sex for security. very pitiful.
there are worse. -
Err... About your gifts... No, you shouldn't be giving them out... At least not at this point if it helps?Originally posted by Miyuki481:Hi all,
I need some advice on this. My story goes like thisÂ…..
I have try in the past to get know a particular gal, she is the sort with unusual form of character. What I mean is that she is the hard hearted kind of girl I foundÂ…Â….No matter how I conveyed to her the care and concern extraordinarily always seem that she do not know fully of my actions or onli know about 50% that wat I am doing for her.
I have a principle which I think it is stupid. I do not want to harbor any motives for doing her care although there is one in the first place I admit. But i do not always wan to high light wat I AM DOING IS FOR HER. BTW this is the 2nd year I am waiting hopefully she will be touchedÂ…. To share some background, she did not have relationship b4 and do not wan one currently. This I know, that y I patiently lie in wait. All sort of things I done for her in preparations for her forthcoming birthday. The advice I sought from u all is that should I give all this presents to her knowing that I will kanna rejected once againÂ… it is the present I store and delayed until her birthdayÂ…..eg one for valentine one for Christmas and etcÂ…Â…Â…sadly I failed to give. I read the board and realize it is a good board for lost souls like me.
Should I give up at this point? And should I celebrate for her?
tks
Sorry to say this... But from the way you've expressed yourself, it's quite unlikely that the girl is totally numb or stupid.. It's quite likely that she has chose to be irresponsive. To just suddenly confess that you're interested in her to a girl who has no previous relationship experience is quite like to shock or freak her to an extent. Do you have much handling experience yourself? Cause from the way you've described yourself, I say you don't seem to be so... The 'boo effect' from an inexperienced guy telling an inexperienced girl could be quite a bad math unless she's really keen on you (which like I've mentioned, don't seems to be the case...?)... The fact that you've ACCUMULATED all your gifts for her over such an extensive period is quite unlikely to touch her unless she harbours special feelings for you.. IN FACT, it's more likely to give her the FREAK unless she's quite an OPEN girl... If you really must, I say start SIMPLE.. Just a simple arrangement for meet up and birthday gift if you like should do the trick... (in the event where she is not comfortable for meet up, do NOT push for it... Be a gentleman and just give her a present...)
At this point... Would you like to explain why you think she's the 'hard hearted' kinda girl...? Maybe you should really be having more contacts with her to have a 'feel' of how she might be seeing you...? (note. READ hints if they're there and not simply to IMAGINE that she's interested or uninterested in you...) -
Actually I know it may not turn out good. My female friends advise me to try one very last time, if still cannot give up. This I also share the same sentiments. I got two options which I am pondering now at the moment:
Firstly give all the accumulated presents and organize a party for her specially Â….by the way it is a group of female frens and me and herÂ…I am not particularly about whether celebrate her alone or with frens Â…no issue here
Or option 2:
give my present as parts to all my closest female frens Â….let them understand and know of my loveÂ….. by the way they all have all seen my actions and care and concerns which often extend to them tooÂ…I believe in ai hu ji huÂ….. sometimes I wonder frens see the most while the girl that one often like see the leastÂ….. but nevermind back to the option
and GIVE HER A SIMPLE PRESENT AS A FRENÂ….this option I dun quite like but bo pian.
Tks everyone for your kind inputs earlier -
You sure have weird thinkings...Originally posted by Miyuki481:Actually I know it may not turn out good. My female friends advise me to try one very last time, if still cannot give up. This I also share the same sentiments. I got two options which I am pondering now at the moment:
Firstly give all the accumulated presents and organize a party for her specially Â….by the way it is a group of female frens and me and herÂ…I am not particularly about whether celebrate her alone or with frens Â…no issue here
Like I've said, giving all your accumulated gifts at one go is not advisable...
Or option 2:
give my present as parts to all my closest female frens Â….let them understand and know of my loveÂ….. by the way they all have all seen my actions and care and concerns which often extend to them tooÂ…I believe in ai hu ji huÂ….. sometimes I wonder frens see the most while the girl that one often like see the leastÂ….. but nevermind back to the option
and GIVE HER A SIMPLE PRESENT AS A FRENÂ….this option I dun quite like but bo pian.
Tks everyone for your kind inputs earlier