work dynamics.. Pissing me off
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I'm a straightforward person. In group dynamics, i seldom do the little talk or bootlick but either am i too serious. Im just too focus on my job. Never impose my ideas on others and either do i think im superior... in any ways
People think i dao cos i never try to make an attempt to " Gum " with them but im the kind that need time to warm up to and the type that feel comfortable with certain type of pple.. then can click... ok maybe pple misunderstand me easily.
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i got 1 week of lesson + project this week
Tues: didnt go lessons but they forget to allocate things for me to do. So @ nite, i ask them anyone need help. This guy A supposed to allocate stuffs to me but he say dun need my help. K find. but i did help some one @ 2am to research.
wed: im piss with the way some pple treat me..
for ex, i skip afternoon lesson just to do FYP yesterday so that i can do project discussion in the evening( instead doing FYP ), expect them to call me or just sms to tell me that they are doing project but they didnt.. Someone frm my grp told me that Same guy A will call me when they are dong project but he didnt...
Thur: Today, there guy again didnt include me in the project. i m farking piss wiht him. Ordering mac for lunch so can do research. cos i was late and so sit not near with them but they didn't ask me wana order mac.. so now im typing this to vent anger.. cos i feele excluded
There Guy A didnt go for lessons for 3 days.. though he redeem himself in the some parts of the projects.. im just piss with how he do things... -
before the project start, you all never elect a group leader???
That group leader will then update everyone by sms or email the progress and set up a meeting where everyone can make it...
Maybe your group thinks you too busy or not interested in the project....so you have to show your face more often....like next time dont call up A, call B or C, also....ask them how's progress....
If all A, B, and C...are those no leadership one...then maybe you have to step up loh...but remember not to be too overbearing and boss around.
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Originally posted by Isis:
Seriously... I really don't quite get parts of your post...
I'm a straightforward person. In group dynamics, i seldom do the little talk or bootlick but either am i too serious. Im just too focus on my job. Never impose my ideas on others and either do i think im superior... in any ways
People think i dao cos i never try to make an attempt to " Gum " with them but im the kind that need time to warm up to and the type that feel comfortable with certain type of pple.. then can click... ok maybe pple misunderstand me easily.
....
i got 1 week of lesson + project this week
Tues: didnt go lessons but they forget to allocate things for me to do. So @ nite, i ask them anyone need help. This guy [b]A supposed to allocate stuffs to me but he say dun need my help. K find. but i did help some one @ 2am to research.
wed: im piss with the way some pple treat me..
for ex, i skip afternoon lesson just to do FYP yesterday so that i can do project discussion in the evening( instead doing FYP ), expect them to call me or just sms to tell me that they are doing project but they didnt.. Someone frm my grp told me that Same guy A will call me when they are dong project but he didnt...
Thur: Today, there guy again didnt include me in the project. i m farking piss wiht him. Ordering mac for lunch so can do research. cos i was late and so sit not near with them but they didn't ask me wana order mac.. so now im typing this to vent anger.. cos i feele excluded
There Guy A didnt go for lessons for 3 days.. though he redeem himself in the some parts of the projects.. im just piss with how he do things...
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Anyway... From the impression of your post.. I think you really should at least maintain a certain level of communication with your project mates... It's not just about 'gum' or not comfortable... It's MINIMUM JOB REQUIREMENT... If you work in a GROUP, MINIMUM COMMUNICATIONS MUST be there... Are you a MALE? If you are and have already SERVED your NS, you should easily understand what I mean....
The part where ya skipped your afternoon lesson to do your FYP... Did you expect them to do the project at the same time while you're doing your FYP...? (This part I can't quite understand from your post...) From what I see, you might see yourself as doing a 'sacrifice' for the team... But they might not be thinking the same way? That they could be doing the project while you're not...?
Another thing... Never quite mind if they didn't call you or anything... From what I see, you've already got a communication problem going on with them... And such communication break down usually goes both ways... With that kinda communication going on, the MacDonald's thingy shouldn't have came as a surprise at all...?
You can go ahead and BLAME the whole team.. But my personal advice for you is not to make yourself a 'public enemy'... Otherwise it would just be so simple... May it be guy 'A', 'B', 'C' or 'D'.... Any of them who's not on good terms with you can easily get you into enough trouble....
Btw, what is the 'lesson' for..? For your project...? Would your replacement of your lesson with FYP caused a bad impression on them? -
i was told by another guy that guy A will call me to inform me where is the location of the meeting so i thought i was assured that i will be informed. Some people in the team didn't know why i was late and this affected my team assessment marks.Originally posted by Devil1976:Seriously... I really don't quite get parts of your post...
Anyway... From the impression of your post.. I think you really should at least maintain a certain level of communication with your project mates... It's not just about 'gum' or not comfortable... It's MINIMUM JOB REQUIREMENT... If you work in a GROUP, MINIMUM COMMUNICATIONS MUST be there... Are you a MALE? If you are and have already SERVED your NS, you should easily understand what I mean....
The part where ya skipped your afternoon lesson to do your FYP... Did you expect them to do the project at the same time while you're doing your FYP...? (This part I can't quite understand from your post...) From what I see, you might see yourself as doing a 'sacrifice' for the team... But they might not be thinking the same way? That they could be doing the project while you're not...?
Another thing... Never quite mind if they didn't call you or anything... From what I see, you've already got a communication problem going on with them... And such communication break down usually goes both ways... With that kinda communication going on, the MacDonald's thingy shouldn't have came as a surprise at all...?
You can go ahead and BLAME the whole team.. But my personal advice for you is not to make yourself a 'public enemy'... Otherwise it would just be so simple... May it be guy 'A', 'B', 'C' or 'D'.... Any of them who's not on good terms with you can easily get you into enough trouble....
Btw, what is the 'lesson' for..? For your project...? Would your replacement of your lesson with FYP caused a bad impression on them?
Another thing was that i wasn't around on tuesday and they were supposed to split work loads. Guy A was supposed to tell me what i was supposed to do. Then he told me he can settle everythings. i wanted to do something and not a free-rider so i take the initative to ask him if he need help. He told me no. then i found out he ask another person to help him and the person complain to me cos he ask her to do @ 1am in the morning. I was quite taken aback and disgusted with his attitude cos i suspect he don't trust me enuff. ok so for some reasons he don't trust me... but as a team, we should back each other up and grow with each other in team.. but in this team it is not so.. quite sad to work in this team..
Guy A was supposed to email everyone the final report. i really need the report due to my part of the project. i have to double msn, call and sms him to get it when presentation was to be today. i don't even have time to prepare when my weakness is presentation. This gives me anxiety. i ask him whether he need help, he don't my help and instead complaining in the sms that he can't finish.. say the part that we give is not enough.. in the first place, there was no communication among others and indication of help. ( im free.. can use me wah.. somemore i volunteer )
Im quiet but @ least i'm willing to do my works. i feel excluded in the team and extremely unhappy.I don't bootlick so does that mean that they ( a few in the team ) should isolate pple who don't bootlick or try to be gum gum with them? which i find childish!
Im not blaming the whole team. . just arrowing this Guy A + afew. -
Originally posted by Isis:
As told, your team has a communication problem and as I've suspected you people have got some issues on trust as well...
i was told by another guy that guy [b]A will call me to inform me where is the location of the meeting so i thought i was assured that i will be informed. Some people in the team didn't know why i was late and this affected my team assessment marks.
Another thing was that i wasn't around on tuesday and they were supposed to split work loads. Guy A was supposed to tell me what i was supposed to do. Then he told me he can settle everythings. i wanted to do something and not a free-rider so i take the initative to ask him if he need help. He told me no. then i found out he ask another person to help him and the person complain to me cos he ask her to do @ 1am in the morning. I was quite taken aback and disgusted with his attitude cos i suspect he don't trust me enuff. ok so for some reasons he don't trust me... but as a team, we should back each other up and grow with each other in team.. but in this team it is not so.. quite sad to work in this team..
Guy A was supposed to email everyone the final report. i really need the report due to my part of the project. i have to double msn, call and sms him to get it when presentation was to be today. i don't even have time to prepare when my weakness is presentation. This gives me anxiety. i ask him whether he need help, he don't my help and instead complaining in the sms that he can't finish.. say the part that we give is not enough.. in the first place, there was no communication among others and indication of help. ( im free.. can use me wah.. somemore i volunteer )
Im quiet but @ least i'm willing to do my works. i feel excluded in the team and extremely unhappy.I don't bootlick so does that mean that they ( a few in the team ) should isolate pple who don't bootlick or try to be gum gum with them? which i find childish!
Im not blaming the whole team. . just arrowing this Guy A + afew.
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Does your team have a leader? Or are you actually one?
Your mentality about growing together as a team is NICE, but the problem lies with the fact that there're NO ACTIONS...
One of the 1st priorities in a team project.. You must see how this team can WORK and FUNCTION as a TEAM....
'Jobs allocation' is an important part of a project management, and that task should be assigned to someone who can handle it well and preferably with some authorities on hand.
No doubt I can understand that often there're bound to be one or a few people who might make life difficult for the overall performance of the team... But you've got to think TEAM and PROJECT. There often ain't much point in 'finger-pointings' if you really want serious works done... Of course as much as there probably won't be time to babysit those people even for a team leader... Try to assign jobs in such a way that at least a capable one can watch over such a form of character... And the work nature they share should allow for them to work CLOSELY with each other... Almost like a 'buddy system' so that targets and objectives could be met and not pulled down by such individuals....
Have more frequent meet ups among team mates for better communications and to clear doubts... Formal or informal, that's what meetings are for... -
im not the leader. there is one who seems to be the one who is the leader who delegate jobs... but he is not doing the job well...so? F u c k itOriginally posted by Devil1976:As told, your team has a communication problem and as I've suspected you people have got some issues on trust as well...
Does your team have a leader? Or are you actually one?
Your mentality about growing together as a team is NICE, but the problem lies with the fact that there're NO ACTIONS...
One of the 1st priorities in a team project.. You must see how this team can WORK and FUNCTION as a TEAM....
'Jobs allocation' is an important part of a project management, and that task should be assigned to someone who can handle it well and preferably with some authorities on hand.
No doubt I can understand that often there're bound to be one or a few
people who might make life difficult for the overall performance of the team... But you've got to think TEAM and PROJECT. There often ain't much point in 'finger-pointings' if you really want serious works done... Of course as much as there probably won't be time to babysit those people even for a team leader... Try to assign jobs in such a way that at least a capable one can watch over such a form of character... And the work nature they share should allow for them to work CLOSELY with each other... Almost like a 'buddy system' so that targets and objectives could be met and not pulled down by such individuals....
Have more frequent meet ups among team mates for better communications and to clear doubts... Formal or informal, that's what meetings are for...
some of the people in the team is actaully 2 snake-header. 3 / 10 people who back-stab. Well, in working world, back-stab is unevitable when conflicts of interests arise. I just need to be more careful and stop rely on people on just their words. Perhaps i need to act 'gum gum' with them too.
Yup team and project.. that what i want But those people are not doing there... i m just venting my anger here.. -
If you think that one isn't doing a good job as a leader, do you think you can do better? As I've always said, nobody's perfect.. 2 headed snakes, back-stabbers.. Whatever you label them as... They might be seeing you as one who simply don't get along with the others too...? So why bother?Originally posted by Isis:im not the leader. there is one who seems to be the one who is the leader who delegate jobs... but he is not doing the job well...so? F u c k it
some of the people in the team is actaully 2 snake-header. 3 / 10 people who back-stab. Well, in working world, back-stab is unevitable when conflicts of interests arise. I just need to be more careful and stop rely on people on just their words. Perhaps i need to act 'gum gum' with them too.
Yup team and project.. that what i want But those people are not doing there... i m just venting my anger here..
Yes... Very much of all these things just boil down to EQ...
If you think the team sucks... And there's nobody to buck them up together, they just stay the same... Just the way life works... -
As in answering "why bother? "Originally posted by Devil1976:If you think that one isn't doing a good job as a leader, do you think you can do better? As I've always said, nobody's perfect.. 2 headed snakes, back-stabbers.. Whatever you label them as... They might be seeing you as one who simply don't get along with the others too...? So why bother?
Yes... Very much of all these things just boil down to EQ...
If you think the team sucks... And there's nobody to buck them up together, they just stay the same... Just the way life works...
i just try to vent my unhappiness..emotion here.. sorry manz.. u have to tolerance it..
yup no one is perfect, everyone err, me err too. Maybe that they like me label me as someone hard to work with ( for whatever reasons ). I still think i need to identitfy people who have the tendency to betray and people who do not have the right work ethics or integrity so that in the future i know who i can choose to work with right?...
i do not want to be the leader cos i know i do not have the time to commit to such a task. It's saddening me when the rest do not want to help to step up and foster bondings. Perhaps they do have their own reasons.
I just want to be myself. Anyway as i have said i do not know them when i was put into the group. Perhaps i need to do some small talks to foster bodnings which i tried but i didn't really like to talk for idle talk sake cos it is just not me. Maybe im not suit for the business world.
I think it's a matter of choice whether i want to stick to my own individuality or compromise in situation. In this case, i don't wise to compromise on people who i have to double msn, call and sms but in the end i still did for the overall situation sake. The above event which u don't get happen only in the first few days of the project.
It's their actions that make me label them but that does not mean i will stick to this label all the time. people do change over times. -
my team oso luan ci ba zao.
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Just a few words of reminder for those in blue.... As much as you can choose and pick on people, people can do the same to you... Ultimately.. It's often those without 'bonding' with the others who is gonna lose out, unless you're their superior....?Originally posted by Isis:As in answering "why bother? "
i just try to vent my unhappiness..emotion here.. sorry manz.. u have to tolerance it..
yup no one is perfect, everyone err, me err too. Maybe that they like me label me as someone hard to work with ( for whatever reasons ). I still think i need to identitfy people who have the tendency to betray and people who do not have the right work ethics or integrity so that in the future i know who i can choose to work with right?...
i do not want to be the leader cos i know i do not have the time to commit to such a task. It's saddening me when the rest do not want to help to step up and foster bondings. Perhaps they do have their own reasons.
I just want to be myself. Anyway as i have said i do not know them when i was put into the group. Perhaps i need to do some small talks to foster bodnings which i tried but i didn't really like to talk for idle talk sake cos it is just not me. Maybe im not suit for the business world.
I think it's a matter of choice whether i want to stick to my own individuality or compromise in situation. In this case, i don't wise to compromise on people who i have to double msn, call and sms but in the end i still did for the overall situation sake. The above event which u don't get happen only in the first few days of the project.
It's their actions that make me label them but that does not mean i will stick to this label all the time. people do change over times.
And as told time and again... There's no 'perfect human' in this world... Chances are you'll just have to learn to work with all sorts of people rather than to get to choose who you wanna work with...
Good luck?