Travel With Partner
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Hi,
Me and my bf has been together for 7yrs. Our relationship has been stable. My family (esp my sis) knows him and he often comes to my house. However, whenever I suggests to go travelling with him, my sis will get angry and refused to talk to me. My sis don't want me to go alone with him. I've not travel with my bf alone yet. Becoz every time she gets angry, I'll give up my plan.
Told my sis about my travel plans yesterday. She still jokes about it and said she is afraid that my dad may not like it. My dad is ok with it when I told him today. So just now I told my sis that dad agrees, then she got angry. And now refused to talk to me. I don't understand why one moment she is ok, the next moment she flared up at me.
I really don't wish to give up my plans and disappoint my bf again (has been doing that many times for the past yrs). What should I do? Anyone can advise me how to solve this problem? Do you guys travel with your partners? -
eh. why dont u post ur pic here and ur sis and we taek a look at your problem?
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what's the reason for her getting angry?
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she dun trust ur bf la... jz go ahead wif ur bf n make sure u return safe n intact...
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I smell something beyond the surface.
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Cheers -
mee tooOriginally posted by M©+square:I smell something beyond the surface.
Comments reserved.
Cheers -
Oh newbie, welcome welcome.Originally posted by cristy:mee too
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me 3.Originally posted by cristy:mee too
waiting for threadstarter to reply nia. -
then i say it:
1. either the sis likes the bf and gets angry with the idea of their TMM,
OR
2. the sis doesn't trust her other sis to treat her bf in the matter that she will want to take that treat upon herself.
i'd say....most likely its the first
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Originally posted by tiggersgd:then i say it:
1. either the sis likes the bf and gets angry with the idea of their TMM,
OR
2. the sis doesn't trust her other sis to treat her bf in the matter that she will want to take that treat upon herself.
i'd say....most likely its the first
Another thing is, ple often relate couples gg on trip to sex lor.
but then think of it, 7 yrs liao.. that shouldn't be a worry?
other than that, either the sis is jealous of her or like wat u said, she maybe like him lor. She might also feel that the bf has stolen her sis.
I have a fren who was like that also, kicked up a big fuss when her sis was lovey dovey with her bf, she kept passing bad remarks about her, say she's being a hypocrite, when he's at home, she will take initiative to do housework etc, spend more time with him, especially weekends etc. Can understand the bonding between sisters, but I think she had gone a bit too much. Advised her a bit, yet she was not appreciative and gave me attutide. I shut up ever since, and washed my hands off her. -
You are like... Err... 29 already...? Why don't your sis worries your plan to travel with your bf....?Originally posted by florajoy:Hi,
Me and my bf has been together for 7yrs. Our relationship has been stable. My family (esp my sis) knows him and he often comes to my house. However, whenever I suggests to go travelling with him, my sis will get angry and refused to talk to me. My sis don't want me to go alone with him. I've not travel with my bf alone yet. Becoz every time she gets angry, I'll give up my plan.
Told my sis about my travel plans yesterday. She still jokes about it and said she is afraid that my dad may not like it. My dad is ok with it when I told him today. So just now I told my sis that dad agrees, then she got angry. And now refused to talk to me. I don't understand why one moment she is ok, the next moment she flared up at me.
I really don't wish to give up my plans and disappoint my bf again (has been doing that many times for the past yrs). What should I do? Anyone can advise me how to solve this problem? Do you guys travel with your partners?
Where are you going btw...? -
just go ahead with the travel.
the idea you have to be clear is that your bf is yours, not hers, if she fared up with you, then ask her why.
she should respect you as her senior, you give her the respect a couple of times, if this time, she still behaves the same as per last time, fared up without giving any reasons, don't care what your sister feels.
sometimes in life, you have to know when to be selfish and when not to be selfish.
this is your life, and probably your husband to be, she should be happy for you too, talk to her, if she respect you, then she will tell you, if not just go ahead with your plans on travelling then. -
Becos u always say travel travel but never mention wanna buy LV bag for her
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how close is your sister with your bf?
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Actually she is my elder sis. She definitely not in love with my bf coz he not her type and she is very much older than him. My family not that close to my bf. He juz occasionally will come over to my house for dinner.
I'm thinking of writing my sis a letter to let her know my feelings/ thoughts. Is that advisable? -
You can try, however, it is important to know what exactly is the issue since the past till now.Originally posted by florajoy:Actually she is my elder sis. She definitely not in love with my bf coz he not her type and she is very much older than him. My family not that close to my bf. He juz occasionally will come over to my house for dinner.
I'm thinking of writing my sis a letter to let her know my feelings/ thoughts. Is that advisable?
Cheers -
I think she feels that it's her responsibility to protect me from any harm. [My mom has passed away] I know she is worried about me. I'm aware of her good intention. That's why I always give in to her demands. But I need to have some personal space and freedom to lead a normal and healthy relationship.
Was hoping to find a nice way to let her understand my needs. Don't want to cause any strain in our relationship -
Then it's better to find out from her and resolve it. Definitely, something must have happened to you or the family(in the past) which led her to such adverse reaction.Originally posted by florajoy:I think she feels that it's her responsibility to protect me from any harm. [My mom has passed away] I know she is worried about me. I'm aware of her good intention. That's why I always give in to her demands. But I need to have some personal space and freedom to lead a normal and healthy relationship.
Was hoping to find a nice way to let her understand my needs. Don't want to cause any strain in our relationship
There could be some insecurity or fear which is the cause of her rejection.
We can't be too sure of what exactly it is and how to go about untying this knot until she reveals it.
Cheers -
I say go with the trip lah... Remember to ask your bf to wear a condom..
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is ur sis married/attached?Originally posted by florajoy:Actually she is my elder sis. She definitely not in love with my bf coz he not her type and she is very much older than him. My family not that close to my bf. He juz occasionally will come over to my house for dinner.
I'm thinking of writing my sis a letter to let her know my feelings/ thoughts. Is that advisable? -
You'll have to let her understand that you're a grown up and you've got your own life to lead...Originally posted by florajoy:I think she feels that it's her responsibility to protect me from any harm. [My mom has passed away] I know she is worried about me. I'm aware of her good intention. That's why I always give in to her demands. But I need to have some personal space and freedom to lead a normal and healthy relationship.
Was hoping to find a nice way to let her understand my needs. Don't want to cause any strain in our relationship -
your story sounds familiar, I have a galfren who is married, she simply refuses to let her sister who is 27/28 yrs old now with a steady boy fren go travelling alone with the partner even tho their mum/dad has no problem with itOriginally posted by florajoy:Hi,
Me and my bf has been together for 7yrs. Our relationship has been stable. My family (esp my sis) knows him and he often comes to my house. However, whenever I suggests to go travelling with him, my sis will get angry and refused to talk to me. My sis don't want me to go alone with him. I've not travel with my bf alone yet. Becoz every time she gets angry, I'll give up my plan.
Told my sis about my travel plans yesterday. She still jokes about it and said she is afraid that my dad may not like it. My dad is ok with it when I told him today. So just now I told my sis that dad agrees, then she got angry. And now refused to talk to me. I don't understand why one moment she is ok, the next moment she flared up at me.
I really don't wish to give up my plans and disappoint my bf again (has been doing that many times for the past yrs). What should I do? Anyone can advise me how to solve this problem? Do you guys travel with your partners?
my gal fren is a little conservative, but what amazes me is that her sister actually listens to her, quite touching loh
nevertheless, try talking heart to heart to your sister and understand her fears and concerns, I'm sure it will all work out -
I've been brought up in an conservative environment. Hence, sex before marriage is a definite no no. Bf and I have discussed it through and we have agreed to only engage in that after being properly married.
My sis isn't married and isn't attached. I sort of suspect she may feel that my bf is trying to "steal" me away from her (as suggested by someone in the thread) and felt insecure.
My only headache is how to raise the topic to her again and have a nice talk to her. She can be really stubborn and gets irritated/ angry easily. I don't want her to misinterpret my intention as trying show disrespect to her or trying to abandon her. -
You're already 29 this year?Originally posted by florajoy:I've been brought up in an conservative environment. Hence, sex before marriage is a definite no no. Bf and I have discussed it through and we have agreed to only engage in that after being properly married.
My sis isn't married and isn't attached. I sort of suspect she may feel that my bf is trying to "steal" me away from her (as suggested by someone in the thread) and felt insecure.
My only headache is how to raise the topic to her again and have a nice talk to her. She can be really stubborn and gets irritated/ angry easily. I don't want her to misinterpret my intention as trying show disrespect to her or trying to abandon her.
Come on. You've got to make her understand that you're no longer a kid. This is about a trip, not about sex. At the current century, she thinks both of you only need to go overseas in order to have sex if you're really into it? -
How about bringing her alone?