I am so helpless!!!can anyone help me??
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I feel scared when i fall in love with someone.i chose to escape,i dare not face the one i am in love wif and aloof in the relationship.I feel so weird and sad, is this the side effect that i was once badly hurted from someone i trust and deeply loved?
Does anyone encounter in this situation before?
Am i never fall in love again?It seem like i'm mentally disordered..i feel so helpless..can anyone give me some advice? -
u're juz scared ull screw the other person up.
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I supposed you have not recovered from the last relationship that has hurt you. What you need is time to heal and try to be in the company of friends. Also you can get a good friend to listen to your problems.Originally posted by anti.flirt: I feel scared when i fall in love with someone.i chose to escape,i dare not face the one i am in love wif and aloof in the relationship.I feel so weird and sad, is this the side effect that i was once badly hurted from someone i trust and deeply loved?
Does anyone encounter in this situation before?
Am i never fall in love again?It seem like i'm mentally disordered..i feel so helpless..can anyone give me some advice?
You can also vent your fustrations in the way you best want it... Maybe you can shout at the sea side? Or go arcade play those challenging games? Or have a good cry? Anything to make you better and DO NOT bottle up. It will hurt more than you want.
You can make new friends here if you like. Or go with some friends and meet other friends. Do not let one set back stop you and rob you of the joy you deserve.
Later you wait, got more suggestions and advices coming in.
Hooooo~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!!!!!! -
U just need to overcome ur phobia... I also have the same feeling as u initially cuz was hurt by someone then feel very low and down... took some time B4 i could overcome... dun think the hurt can cause so much impact on u unless its something memorable.. so dun worry to much jus get on with it..
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I chose to be single for nearly 4 years..i dont know when i ready for a relationship,cause i scared i fall badly again.
as usual i still hangout as normally wif my friends,mostly of my friends know what happen to me..they give me courage and their time listening to my story when i am drunk
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maybe i need some more time,but it is already 4 years..i encounter so many girls in my workplace,sch and nightlife but i chose not to be too friendly wif those i fancy.
Really appreciate to those who reply to my problem..i know it is really very difficult to explain about relationship problem.
sometime i ask myself i might be hurting ppl indirectly too,cause i chose to be cold when girls is being too friendly wif me.. -
being in a r/s is a gamble. sometimes u win, sometimes, u lose.
but, it's not a matter of winning or losing. it's a matter of how commited u r to the r/s itself. it also takes two hands to clap.
so before stepping into any r/s, always start by getting to know the person on a personal level.
i guess u r hurt by past experience. who hasn't? i've been hurt b4 and i can say that i took 4 yrs as well in getting myself ready for another r/s. and the one i'm in right now is going strong.
as mentioned, it takes two hands to clap. if one refuse to be commited, then there's no point continuing the r/s.
i would advice u to be strong and don't take set backs too hard on urself. set backs are there to drag u into disappointments and failures. dun let them succeed! -
and like they say...gambling is play 10 lose 9...Originally posted by Gwangetto:being in a r/s is a gamble. sometimes u win, sometimes, u lose.
but, it's not a matter of winning or losing. it's a matter of how commited u r to the r/s itself. it also takes two hands to clap.
so before stepping into any r/s, always start by getting to know the person on a personal level.
i guess u r hurt by past experience. who hasn't? i've been hurt b4 and i can say that i took 4 yrs as well in getting myself ready for another r/s. and the one i'm in right now is going strong.
as mentioned, it takes two hands to clap. if one refuse to be commited, then there's no point continuing the r/s.
i would advice u to be strong and don't take set backs too hard on urself. set backs are there to drag u into disappointments and failures. dun let them succeed! -
There's no need for advice... Carry on what u r doing and u will be just fine
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This is not a mental disorder lah... In fact, this can be perfectly normal....Originally posted by anti.flirt: I feel scared when i fall in love with someone.i chose to escape,i dare not face the one i am in love wif and aloof in the relationship.I feel so weird and sad, is this the side effect that i was once badly hurted from someone i trust and deeply loved?
Does anyone encounter in this situation before?
Am i never fall in love again?It seem like i'm mentally disordered..i feel so helpless..can anyone give me some advice?
Just need to understand that nothing's perfect in this world.. After you've fallen, just remember to give yourself the chance to get up again... -
nothing wrong with you
somehow, we will all be scared...
just a little bit more courage... bite the bullet and go with it...
good luck yah?
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Everybody has this feeling too because love hurt if you fall for the wrong guy!
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Love is a scary thing
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Originally posted by anti.flirt: I feel scared when i fall in love with someone.i chose to escape,i dare not face the one i am in love wif and aloof in the relationship.I feel so weird and sad, is this the side effect that i was once badly hurted from someone i trust and deeply loved?
Does anyone encounter in this situation before?
Am i never fall in love again?It seem like i'm mentally disordered..i feel so helpless..can anyone give me some advice?
You can secure yourself with fear, until the day when you have the wisdom to understand that to love means having to open yourself to 'infection'. And there is always that risk, since you open your soul to a complete stranger with the advent of Love.
You can be overly self protective, but at the end of your day, your growth is minimal.
The only person who has never encounter failure in relationships are those who never try.
You may have craved to love and be loved deep inside, but your automatic thoughts for the fear of hurt may be stronger than your desire to be in a fulfilling relationship.
Nurse your wounds from within - four years is a long time to be dwelling over past issues. Don't waste another four years being overly affected by the past because it may come a day when there is someone suitable, but because you are unstable, you bring on your instability onto her/relationship and cause emotional fissure.
Cheers -
Im oso feeling the same as uOriginally posted by anti.flirt: I feel scared when i fall in love with someone.i chose to escape,i dare not face the one i am in love wif and aloof in the relationship.I feel so weird and sad, is this the side effect that i was once badly hurted from someone i trust and deeply loved?
Does anyone encounter in this situation before?
Am i never fall in love again?It seem like i'm mentally disordered..i feel so helpless..can anyone give me some advice?
u wun die from it
no one can predict what will love turns out to be
love itself is gamble -
When i lost her,i couldn't accept it..i didn't understand why it was happening to me.But i told myself i had to get used to it and thing will be better to me.But i can't change!!how could i change so easily??
I was holding to it all this time,but recently i found someone special but i still couldnt change my feeling,i chose avoiding everytime, i make myself very busy inorder to make my feeling of her to fade as the time go by.BUT i know i didn't change anything at all.
I'm totally loss..i couldn't forget of my ex and couldn't have new relationship.
Sorry to make you all listen to my trifle is easy to type,then talk to my friends. -
same fate..Originally posted by anti.flirt: I feel scared when i fall in love with someone.i chose to escape,i dare not face the one i am in love wif and aloof in the relationship.I feel so weird and sad, is this the side effect that i was once badly hurted from someone i trust and deeply loved?
Does anyone encounter in this situation before?
Am i never fall in love again?It seem like i'm mentally disordered..i feel so helpless..can anyone give me some advice?
mie oso haf e same problem till i even got despression..
den i haf re-cover recently..cuz i really feel lost..i dunno wat i want.n i dunno hu ish e next guy out dere hu ish gg hurt mie again..
but now i feel tt i haf sort of gib up on guys..i haf no feeling about guys
anymore..sumtimes i juz feel soo lonely tt i need sumone around mie den next min i will be lky think tt i need tu be independent in life..
maybe tt's fate ba..
soO now i juz can advise eUu tt try tu re-cover frm ur past hurting experience and wait till eUu r mentally / socially ready fer another new r/s..or else nthin eUu to or even hide will help .. -
Originally posted by anti.flirt: When i lost her,i couldn't accept it..i didn't understand why it was happening to me.But i told myself i had to get used to it and thing will be better to me.But i can't change!!how could i change so easily??
I was holding to it all this time,but recently i found someone special but i still couldnt change my feeling,i chose avoiding everytime, i make myself very busy inorder to make my feeling of her to fade as the time go by.BUT i know i didn't change anything at all.
I'm totally loss..i couldn't forget of my ex and couldn't have new relationship.
Sorry to make you all listen to my trifle is easy to type,then talk to my friends.
i tot euU r a gal...
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same tragedy.same loneliness we are still human being right,not only girl having R/s problem only??Don't really think hiding help No point only wasting precious time,i would rather concentrate on my career..giving up hope on girls,but i will still be a straight one..Originally posted by Princess livia:
i tot euU r a gal...
Princess livia giving chance to butch?Seem u giving up hope to guys..it is really common nowadays..
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hopefully u will meet someone who can make u open ur heart amd arms to embrace her.
If u never try, u will never gain..
so take a deep breath, have more courage and confidence, and love again.
every r/s has its risks.. love does not come with a guarantee..
if it has a gd ending, good.
if u fail again, take it as a lesson learnt. -
She either meant GOD or a person whom you feel can really "relate" to... not the surgeon.Originally posted by browniebaobao:hopefully u will meet someone who can make u open ur heart amd arms to embrace him.
If u never try, u will never gain..
so take a deep breath, have more courage and confidence, and love again. -
BUTCH???!!Originally posted by anti.flirt:same tragedy.same loneliness we are still human being right,not only girl having R/s problem only??Don't really think hiding help No point only wasting precious time,i would rather concentrate on my career..giving up hope on girls,but i will still be a straight one..
Princess livia giving chance to butch?Seem u giving up hope to guys..it is really common nowadays..
haha..eUu muz be kidding..no thanks..
but maybe i will be les..
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wat talking u?Originally posted by Bontakun:She either meant GOD or a person whom you feel can really "relate" to... not the surgeon.
so qiao ar?
every thread i post reply, i see ur post after mine. -
Originally posted by Princess livia:BUTCH???!!
haha..eUu muz be kidding..no thanks..
but maybe i will be les.. lesbian ..ok hope u get yr happiness soon.. -
Originally posted by Princess livia:BUTCH???!!
haha..eUu muz be kidding..no thanks..
but maybe i will be les.. lesbian ..ok hope u get yr happiness soon.. -
I eng mah... coz sooner I not so eng, not so qiao liao wat...Originally posted by browniebaobao:wat talking u?
so qiao ar?
every thread i post reply, i see ur post after mine.