She's miserable..
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she's my colleague..
comes from a wealthy family..
but problems r friends always make used of her cus she owns a car..
go out late at night always jio her cus they can get free ride home..
her bf left her cus he cannot afford to marry her..
and he feels that he's not fit to be with her..
she smokes cus she wanna shorten her life..
she cut her wrist many times before..
everyday she's pretending that she's happy but deep inside her she's not..
i've always try to console her..
but to no avail..
now i've tried to cheer her up everyday..
jus wanna make sure she stays happy..
SheÂ’s a very pessimistic person and I'm always telling her to look at the bright side..
But seems like she doesnÂ’t really take my advice..
Hai~~
How to help her?? -
intro to me i make her happy
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You might just be her saviour.
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Your friend is too focused on her own misery.
Just bring her to perform some volunteer work.
It will show her that she is already very lucky to be what she is.
Through the process of giving, she should be able to understand life and appreciate life.
Consoling her is no use.
Have to bring her out of the vicious cycle of self-pity. -
sounds a lil like me too
some people are born to be victims, to be used int his world. Perhaps its their fate -
whoa all these stupid fuckers man so lucky and rich with a good life still thikn they are miserable and want to end their lives. other people are poor and struggling to survive and these people are born lucky with no worries of any sort behave like this? take away all her money and possesions and throw her onto the streets to survive then she can cut her wrists!
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thats new.
someone feeling miserable all because the root of the evil is her family's wealth.
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$$$ is a source of MANY troubles. Do not let $$$ control you. YOU control the $$$. Lone, if your friend can get what this sentence means, she may not have so many problems as she has now.
She has to find smth besides monetary engagements to see the value of life. Volunteer work, counselling are just some ways to let her see there is more to life than meets the eyes.
Your friend lives in an enviornment of $$$. As a friend, you can try to get her to do smth where $$$ is not an important issue: like people do not see her for her rich background but as the person who she is. I will pray for her well being and may she find joy in life.
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wah kao rich also miserable
But if i am in her shoes,if i want to find real friends,i will not let them know i am rich. -
u sure u nt interested in her? since she feels bad, u hv to take away the picture n bring her somewhere new n let her noe u sincere fren... dun ask her to drive when u jio her...Originally posted by lonestar86:she's my colleague..
comes from a wealthy family..
but problems r friends always make used of her cus she owns a car..
go out late at night always jio her cus they can get free ride home..
bf leaves her cus he cannot afford to marry her..
and he feels that he's not fit to be with her..
she smokes cus she wanna shorten her life..
she cut her wrist many times before..
everyday she's pretending that she's happy but deep inside her she's not..
i've always try to console her..
but to no avail..
now i've tried to cheer her up everyday..
jus wanna make sure she stays happy.. -
Ya, try to get her to public transport like buses or MRT. Let her see da enviornment there. Bring her to nice places and listen to her talk, BUT you oso have to talk abt yourself. Its how you build trust. Open up to her and she will feel comfortable to tell you too. Coz itf you oredi done dat (I tink you done dat...) You perhaps can tell her more abt scenarios dat happened to your frens dats "similar" to hers and share with her.Originally posted by BrUtUs:u sure u nt interested in her? since she feels bad, u hv to take away the picture n bring her somewhere new n let her noe u sincere fren... dun ask her to drive when u jio her...
Nice places not as in couple places, but those with good views dat make ppl soothing in da heart. MacRitchie reservoir is one, Esplanade, Marina Sq da food court non air con section also good choice. Even simple parks or nature reserve can do wonders.
You can also introduce friends who are "not bothered by $$$ or status" when she is ready and comfortable. You will need all the help you can get. -
send her to me.
she'll be alright in no time. -
ya, and u'll lose ur real frens once they know u're testing them out all the while.Originally posted by KenPlus:wah kao rich also miserable
But if i am in her shoes,if i want to find real friends,i will not let them know i am rich. -
poor ple miserable, rich ple also miserable?
maybe she's too easy to be taken advantage of.
about the guy cannot afford to marry her, is that just an excuse?
unless she spends a lot, leading a luxurious life.
if not, i think she can do something about it.
anyway nowadays when 2 persons get married, they still work and support themselves mah. so i think it's not a big deal if she comes from a rich family, unless her parents disapprove or the guy has his pride and ego. -
Quote from the movie "Flight of the Phoenix" :
"I think men only need one thing in lifeÂ… someone to love. If you canÂ’t give them that, then give them something to hope for. And if you canÂ’t give them that, just give them something to do.."
Ask her what she wants to do with her life. From there, comes hope and probably come to love herself & others. -
oh isit?Originally posted by Magnus:Quote from the movie "Flight of the Phoenix" :
"I think men only need one thing in lifeÂ… someone to love. If you canÂ’t give them that, then give them something to hope for. And if you canÂ’t give them that, just give them something to do.."
Ask her what she wants to do with her life. From there, comes hope and probably come to love herself & others.
I always tot love is not the priority to most men.
What a woman want out of love, and what a man want out of love is different. -
It's just a quote from the movie word for word. I did not alter it in any way. Dun take the gender part literally. The cast is predominantly guys with only 1 girl stranded on a desert, something like the show 'LOST'.Originally posted by browniebaobao:oh isit?
I always tot love is not the priority to most men.
What a woman want out of love, and what a man want out of love is different.
Anyway, be it man or woman, we want love in both same & different ways.
Depends on situations.
Overcome with loneliness, sadness,
Or indifference, hate,
etc.. -
more or less....she is partly to blame.....Originally posted by lonestar86:she's my colleague..
comes from a wealthy family..
but problems r friends always make used of her cus she owns a car..
go out late at night always jio her cus they can get free ride home..
bf leaves her cus he cannot afford to marry her..
and he feels that he's not fit to be with her..
she smokes cus she wanna shorten her life..
she cut her wrist many times before..
everyday she's pretending that she's happy but deep inside her she's not..
i've always try to console her..
but to no avail..
now i've tried to cheer her up everyday..
jus wanna make sure she stays happy..
if pple keep taking advantage of her...she should put a stop to it..... now everything collapse on her n she cant see the light anymore.
she sounds very depressed to me.
actually..i dont know if this might work for her..... but being a girl...and girls usually soft spot for animals n children...
bring her to pet shops.....show her cute lil animals.... bring her to hte zoo..looka t those baby animals...... ask her if she wanna take gd care of one cutie rabbit or something...at least having a cute pet arnd...she will care n put into consideration about the pet if she wanna do stupid things.
let her be arnd children.
animals and children innocence can touch one's heart.
Animals n children look at this world with full of anticipation and positive mindset. Even when they fell ill or feel down, they step outta their down mood quicker and strive to survive. U shld watch how lil babies learn to walk. even though they fell many times..they dont give up ones.
right now she have to learn to appreciate wat tat is around her and her life..including you.
if tat doesnt work..bring her to those cancer wards....especially those children cancer ward..let her see those dying kids who struggle to live....tell her tat they suffer alot more than her..yet htey are tryign to survive...U can also try the coma ward or ICU .....thye are suffering pains and pains..yet they are ifghting to live....the more she shld cherish her life right now.
Just the pain of a heartbreak and many times being taken advantage of is much better than being a young kid who has never seen the world n suffering day in day out with physical pain or someone brain damaged yet struggling nto stay alive.
tell her that it hurts to see a loved one being hurt...it hurts to see her like that...
motivate her...encourage her..... u can start off by buying motivation books or happiness books.
if all things fail...time to see a shrink. -
Originally posted by browniebaobao:oh isit?
I always tot love is not the priority to most men.
What a woman want out of love, and what a man want out of love is different.
Men - HUMAN BEING.
Cheers -
Yes, this is exactly what sheÂ’s doing..Originally posted by KenPlus:wah kao rich also miserable
But if i am in her shoes,if i want to find real friends,i will not let them know i am rich.
According to her, among all our colleagues, IÂ’m the only one who knows that she comes from a wealthy family.. -
Fyi, sheÂ’s taking public transport to work everyday..Originally posted by Bontakun:Ya, try to get her to public transport like buses or MRT. Let her see da enviornment there. Bring her to nice places and listen to her talk, BUT you oso have to talk abt yourself. Its how you build trust. Open up to her and she will feel comfortable to tell you too. Coz itf you oredi done dat (I tink you done dat...) You perhaps can tell her more abt scenarios dat happened to your frens dats "similar" to hers and share with her.
Nice places not as in couple places, but those with good views dat make ppl soothing in da heart. MacRitchie reservoir is one, Esplanade, Marina Sq da food court non air con section also good choice. Even simple parks or nature reserve can do wonders.
You can also introduce friends who are "not bothered by $$$ or status" when she is ready and comfortable. You will need all the help you can get.
Cus she doesnÂ’t want ppl (esp our colleagues) to know that she owns a car.. -
TheyÂ’ve been together for 6 yrs and have reached the stage of getting married..Originally posted by browniebaobao:poor ple miserable, rich ple also miserable?
maybe she's too easy to be taken advantage of.
about the guy cannot afford to marry her, is that just an excuse?
unless she spends a lot, leading a luxurious life.
if not, i think she can do something about it.
anyway nowadays when 2 persons get married, they still work and support themselves mah. so i think it's not a big deal if she comes from a rich family, unless her parents disapprove or the guy has his pride and ego.
Her mum actually request for dunno how many tables..
But the guy canÂ’t afford the $$ for the tables..
Not only that, getting married also need lots of $$ for many others things right??
I dunno lah, didnÂ’t get married before..
Dunno all these stuff.. -
Yup, she has depression..Originally posted by babyreyes:she sounds very depressed to me.
actually..i dont know if this might work for her..... but being a girl...and girls usually soft spot for animals n children...
bring her to pet shops.....show her cute lil animals.... bring her to hte zoo..looka t those baby animals...... ask her if she wanna take gd care of one cutie rabbit or something...at least having a cute pet arnd...she will care n put into consideration about the pet if she wanna do stupid things.
let her be arnd children.
animals and children innocence can touch one's heart.
Animals n children look at this world with full of anticipation and positive mindset. Even when they fell ill or feel down, they step outta their down mood quicker and strive to survive. U shld watch how lil babies learn to walk. even though they fell many times..they dont give up ones.
right now she have to learn to appreciate wat tat is around her and her life..including you.
if tat doesnt work..bring her to those cancer wards....especially those children cancer ward..let her see those dying kids who struggle to live....tell her tat they suffer alot more than her..yet htey are tryign to survive...U can also try the coma ward or ICU .....thye are suffering pains and pains..yet they are ifghting to live....the more she shld cherish her life right now.
Just the pain of a heartbreak and many times being taken advantage of is much better than being a young kid who has never seen the world n suffering day in day out with physical pain or someone brain damaged yet struggling nto stay alive.
tell her that it hurts to see a loved one being hurt...it hurts to see her like that...
motivate her...encourage her..... u can start off by buying motivation books or happiness books.
if all things fail...time to see a shrink.
Btw, she has a pet dog.. -
fyi money can't buy happiness. it never could.
no matter how rich she is, i believe that it's a matter of time before she'll be able to find a more secured bf who loves her unconditionally.
also, she should be wise enuff to discern who r the right kind of friends around her. if those r the "friends" she has who constantly, like what u said, made use of her, then i suggest it's time for her to get a new group of friends who r sincerely true to her.
in this world, whether u r rich or middle class, it's so important to keep a good company, people who r capable yet amiable around u.
but hey, maybe u can start being her friend? and see that she's doing okay.
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yes, i'm very closed to her..Originally posted by Gwangetto:but hey, maybe u can start being her friend? and see that she's doing okay.
she trusts me a lot..