This doesn't contributes to the "favoritism"???Originally posted by crystalangel:Dear FORGET-ME-NOT,
I sure not only you will feel this way. There is a lot of others who feels exactly the same as you too. But remember, there are things in the world which you will not get a second chance to do things right again.
Treat your mum well now, so you won't live in regret should she left this world. I once have a granny whom she treat and take care of me very well. She was very independent and don't need any of her children and grandchildren to take care of her though she's 77. After she gotten cancer, she came to live with us. She shared my room which at that time i feel that she was a intruder to my privacy and space. Everyweek, she would secretly gave me a $50 allowance. When i'm down, she would hold my hand. Nonetheless, i continued to resent her sharing my room..... I truly regret now but the chance for me to be good to her was no more. She left the world suddenly one day. That was 2 years already. I still miss her though.
Another thing i would like to mention is that though there is favourtism practise in your family, i'm sure they will definitely by your side if you ever need their support. I'm a walking proof. Growing up, i'm a rebelious, short tempered, crazy girl. I spend money like water and in the end, i accumulate a fair bit of debts. Of course, i can't clear the debts by myself. In the ends, its my family who helps me. Till now, i'm still the rebelious, short tempered, crazy ger, but well, i'm a bit more mellow down already...
Always remember "things are not always as they seem". There may be one day when your mum will reciprocate your goodwill. And when that day happens, will you be there to experience it?Originally posted by FORGET-ME-NOT:I will just do what a child should do but not to the extent now. I used to scold my sister for not treating her well. But now I keep one eye close despite I am heart pain.
I meaned is a sad thing, for all these years I have been working so hard to be a child that she is proud of but no avail. I am very disappointed. I think really no point being good to others as there is no definite return.
Because of these I think I am almost the same as your sister. I hate parent who is not sensitive to her own children. What's the point of giving birth and bring her to the world if you can't take good care of her. All they care about is 'yang lao'. This childhood affect me a lot. I will be a justic mother, no child of mine will suffer what I suffer.Originally posted by spinsugar:I have a younger sis and a younger bro. My mom loves me the most, followed by my brother (he's the only son), and my sis. I grew up watching my sis suffer because of this. (our dad was never in the picture, and we all preferred it that way) Although I did my best to make her feel equal (eg. splitting my stuff & pocket money, playing all sorts of make believe games & even sharing school fees with her so she wouldn't feel left out), she became bitter and jealous.
It became progressively worse with time.. she became manipulative, untrusting, always believing everyone must have a hidden agenda if they're nice to u.. up to a point where she hurt me to get what she wanted. I was forced to repatriate and sunk into a year-long depression.. up till that point, I had believed that we were so close.
I recall my shock when during that fateful event 3 years ago she uttered, "What do you know? Mommy loves you the most!" She was 19. It was then that I realised how deep her wound was.
Fortunately, she's overcome most of it at age 21, and our family somehow united after some major events...
It was a very long hard road for us, and I would hate to see anything like this repeat in other families because of parental favouritsm. Every child should be as precious as the next.
Hi FORGET-ME-NOT,Originally posted by FORGET-ME-NOT:I am very upset. Last Saturday, traveled all my way to my parent house and they just went out to meet my elder sister. Ever since I moved out of the house, the only time they visit me is during Chinese New Year and I visit them weekly. Now I sell my car away, so the only time I can get together with them is during the weekend. I still contribute the same amount to her even though I donÂ’t eat and live there. Yet my elder sister who live near her, eat there everyday still contribute the same amount as me. She take great care for her, care for her babies and many other. They call each other everyday yet we seldom on the line. Even if I talk to her, she just keeps on talking about them non-stop. She complains that I am earning very little since I am a degree holder. If she thinks so then why take so much from me? Plus I use my own money to get a degree. Maybe due to I donÂ’t have finance burden. Recently, she just told me that she has closed a joint account with me and reopen another account with my sister. The reason she given me is because the joint account interest is low. The new account that she put her money in is OCBC and can fetch a better interest. I search through the OCBC website but no special promotion. I donÂ’t need her money but all her saving is lock with my sister. Is very unfair because part of her saving is my allowance to her. I donÂ’t know why she is so bias since young I have been striving to be the same as my sister. I give her the same allowance as my sister, I buy gift for her during mother day and her birthday. I even drive her around. I am sick of it. I am not going back every weekly. I think I will still contribute every month as a token to her for bringing me up as for her money. So we donÂ’t own one another. She can leave it to her darling. I have my own hand and feet to feed myself.
Just a word to those parent, donÂ’t ever play favoritism. If you are then donÂ’t give birth to so many children. For the sake of old age? Like the Chinese speaking, fingers also got short and long. I will just give birth to a child and give him/ her all I have.
Maybe your parents think u r stronger,hence focus more on your elder sis?Originally posted by FORGET-ME-NOT:I am very upset. Last Saturday, traveled all my way to my parent house and they just went out to meet my elder sister. Ever since I moved out of the house, the only time they visit me is during Chinese New Year and I visit them weekly. Now I sell my car away, so the only time I can get together with them is during the weekend. I still contribute the same amount to her even though I donÂ’t eat and live there. Yet my elder sister who live near her, eat there everyday still contribute the same amount as me. She take great care for her, care for her babies and many other. They call each other everyday yet we seldom on the line. Even if I talk to her, she just keeps on talking about them non-stop. She complains that I am earning very little since I am a degree holder. If she thinks so then why take so much from me? Plus I use my own money to get a degree. Maybe due to I donÂ’t have finance burden. Recently, she just told me that she has closed a joint account with me and reopen another account with my sister. The reason she given me is because the joint account interest is low. The new account that she put her money in is OCBC and can fetch a better interest. I search through the OCBC website but no special promotion. I donÂ’t need her money but all her saving is lock with my sister. Is very unfair because part of her saving is my allowance to her. I donÂ’t know why she is so bias since young I have been striving to be the same as my sister. I give her the same allowance as my sister, I buy gift for her during mother day and her birthday. I even drive her around. I am sick of it. I am not going back every weekly. I think I will still contribute every month as a token to her for bringing me up as for her money. So we donÂ’t own one another. She can leave it to her darling. I have my own hand and feet to feed myself.
Just a word to those parent, donÂ’t ever play favoritism. If you are then donÂ’t give birth to so many children. For the sake of old age? Like the Chinese speaking, fingers also got short and long. I will just give birth to a child and give him/ her all I have.
Maybe they feel that your sister is weaker and need more help than you.. thus they focus more on her rather than on you... Dunn think too much and you won't feel so sad...Originally posted by FORGET-ME-NOT:Beckhamagic,
Thankyou. I always tell myself that too. I have to be strong and independant. But sometime I feel sad as parent love nobody can replace.
first wife?Originally posted by missqi:Yeah!
thankfully im the one favored.
lol.
eldest and only daughter with the first wife.
Mine is slightly different, but i think mine is as bad as yours but just in different directions.Originally posted by FORGET-ME-NOT:I am very upset. Last Saturday, traveled all my way to my parent house and they just went out to meet my elder sister. Ever since I moved out of the house, the only time they visit me is during Chinese New Year and I visit them weekly. Now I sell my car away, so the only time I can get together with them is during the weekend. I still contribute the same amount to her even though I donÂ’t eat and live there. Yet my elder sister who live near her, eat there everyday still contribute the same amount as me. She take great care for her, care for her babies and many other. They call each other everyday yet we seldom on the line. Even if I talk to her, she just keeps on talking about them non-stop. She complains that I am earning very little since I am a degree holder. If she thinks so then why take so much from me? Plus I use my own money to get a degree. Maybe due to I donÂ’t have finance burden. Recently, she just told me that she has closed a joint account with me and reopen another account with my sister. The reason she given me is because the joint account interest is low. The new account that she put her money in is OCBC and can fetch a better interest. I search through the OCBC website but no special promotion. I donÂ’t need her money but all her saving is lock with my sister. Is very unfair because part of her saving is my allowance to her. I donÂ’t know why she is so bias since young I have been striving to be the same as my sister. I give her the same allowance as my sister, I buy gift for her during mother day and her birthday. I even drive her around. I am sick of it. I am not going back every weekly. I think I will still contribute every month as a token to her for bringing me up as for her money. So we donÂ’t own one another. She can leave it to her darling. I have my own hand and feet to feed myself.
Just a word to those parent, donÂ’t ever play favoritism. If you are then donÂ’t give birth to so many children. For the sake of old age? Like the Chinese speaking, fingers also got short and long. I will just give birth to a child and give him/ her all I have.