Problems with my mum..

lonestar86

27 Jul 06, 08:24

IÂ’m already 20 yrs old but y canÂ’t my mum just treat me as an adult??
SheÂ’s always nagging me this and that..
Just canÂ’t stop all her nonsense..
I came home late sheÂ’ll nag..
I went to pub with colleague she also nag..
I went out with friends/colleagues she also nag..
I just wanna enjoy my life before I get enlisted, y canÂ’t she just let me enjoy??
IÂ’ve explained nicely to her but she just dun accept all my explanations..
IÂ’ve grown up and I know exactly what IÂ’m doing..
I know how to differentiate whatÂ’s rights and whatÂ’s wrongs..
But she just dun trust me at all..
Even now when IÂ’m using com, sheÂ’ll nag..
Y canÂ’t she just give me a break??
Y canÂ’t she stop making such big fusses over all the minor issues??
She keeps asking me to change my job but it merely left 2 months to my enlistment..
Hai~~ IÂ’ve talked to her lots of time, but sheÂ’s just so unreasonable..

BrUtUs

27 Jul 06, 08:56

cos u still act like a kid...

Devil1976

27 Jul 06, 13:57

How old is she?

Sometimes old folks just nag... PERIOD. Don't take it too personally... Mr. Green

"

SGpork

27 Jul 06, 13:58

no matter what.still ur mum.

Rolling Eyes

MohamedF

27 Jul 06, 14:06

Maybe she wants you to spend more time with her....? You growing up, maybe she angry coz you are going to leave her soon...

mhcampboy

27 Jul 06, 14:08

When you mum is gone, then you will understand and appreciate her better. But then you will regret it... Cool

mhcampboy

27 Jul 06, 14:09

<~~~*~~!!**DUPLICATE POST**!!~~*~~~>

Gwangetto

27 Jul 06, 14:09

u must wait till u're 21. Laughing

GHoST_18

27 Jul 06, 14:10

no matter how old we r...

we r always a kid in our parent's eyes...

Rolling Eyes

meltz

27 Jul 06, 14:10

all mum nag ... so juz treat it as she is singing ... Mr. Green

the.owl

27 Jul 06, 14:11

my mom worse, at least yours nag only. Laughing

Cenarious

27 Jul 06, 14:13

Suicide. That'll teach her.

spinsugar

27 Jul 06, 14:51

You may have disagreements now, but there may be a point in your life later when you feel your time with her is limited.. so if there's anything you can do to improve the relationship, now's a good time to start. I can't stress more on this Smile

For me, my dispute with my mum got so bad that I moved out with my then-boyfriend (now my fiance). Only recently, when my mom found 2 lumps in different parts of her breast, did I realise how silly it was to hold on to all those quarrels .. it wasn't just a problem with her... it was also me. All I needed to do was open up. I was VERY nervous when I moved back with her, fearing a reprise of the past.. but all she had to say was, "Welcome home." and that 5-year old barrier just dissolved.

Try taking more initiative to communicate / bond with your mom, eg :

- update her about small events of your life without her prompting..
- ask HER more frequently about what's she's up to/ her current interests, just sit n listen if and when you have the time..
- make small gestures like offering to buy food home for her.
- If you don't have the time, try to end the conversation on a positive note..
- if she nags, just brush it off laughingly and try to gear the conversation towards any of the above points.

Force yourself to view the situation from a different angle. Dun see it as she's wasting your time / trying to make life hard for u / all her fault or it will show in your body language.. when mums feel like you care, they will trust you more.. and tend to nag less Smile

If you're wondering why she's like that, it's most likely because she is still struggling to accept the changes in you starting from your teen years.. It's quite a common thing. If U keep avoiding/ignoring/being unpleasant with mum, things will really snowball. So guide her along patiently, help her to help you.

Best of luk 2u & ur mum Wink

Devil1976

27 Jul 06, 15:06

Is that the only line you can produce in any case? Rolling Eyes

shin-kyo

27 Jul 06, 15:19

hahas! same as my mother.... she wont listen and always think that she's right... even u tell other people they would say... ur mum is doing for ur own good... hahas...

Ravelin

27 Jul 06, 15:25

20 years old and can't stand the nagging ? What happens when you're 40 and she's still nagging ?

Many ppl I know (myself included) are all grown up, have children of their own and some are even grandpa and grandmum already...and guess what !...their mum (or sometimes dad) are still nagging at them.

I must be lying if I said that I liked it before but now that my mum is in her twilight years (but still nagging), whatever she said is listened to and replied with respect. The seniors won't be around forever so make peace with yourself first and love thy parents.

Heard from a young friend who recently lost her mum that the naggings she got before is the thing that she'll miss the most...and how she wished she could be nagged at by her mum again.

a_splash

27 Jul 06, 15:25

objection!!!!

Embarassed

troublemaker2005

27 Jul 06, 17:10

dun want her to nag nevermind....when you start paying for all the bills in the house then you have all the right to tell her to shut up

Cenarious

27 Jul 06, 17:11

My mother doesn't nag because I am always right.

CKeer

27 Jul 06, 17:13

Objection overruled.
Laughing

I think it's a matter of treating them as nags or advices.

Cheers.
C.K

Darkness_hacker99

27 Jul 06, 18:55

I swear I will migrate to aust after my NS, this is not a place for me.

rathcycle

27 Jul 06, 20:36

O RLY ? you don't go left sometimes ?

Cenarious

27 Jul 06, 20:49

Right as in correct.

mamamamama

27 Jul 06, 23:18

One ear in, the other ear out Mr. Green

nanren4ever

28 Jul 06, 07:12

because u are Not even 21 yet, which is the official age for a adult, that's why ur mum is not treating u like a adult.

Lame joke aside, look at it this way. Most mums are like that. Their children are growing b4 their very eyes, but somehow, all they see is that 6 year old kid in them. It will NEVER change. Ur mum loves u a lot, that's why she do all that. But whether it is right or not, who is to say? u cannot blame the maternal instinct in them.

All u can do is talk to her, make her realise u are already 20, and that u can take gd care of yourself, and that u will make the right choices in life. Do not only talk, but u must prove it with actions. For example, if u say u will reach home a certain time, make sure u do not exceed that time. And call/sms someone in the family if u are late. Let them know ur whereabouts.

It is not a problem at all actually. It is just part and parcel of having a mother who loves and cares for u. U will probably miss ur mother nagging when u go NS, because ur sergeants won't be nagging u, but instead f**king u upside down. Do spare a thought for her feelings, and eventually, she will let go of u gradually.