how to be nt that emotional?
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hi guys...i've always been a failure in managing my own emotions..especially when it comes to BGR...when i wan to like woo a girl and facing quite a num of strong competitors. i will feel scared and wanting to give up cos i will feel that i am nt worthy for her but i will miss her and still in the crossroads of wanting to woo her or not...help mi...and i tend to put lots of feeling when i wan to woo a girl or when i am in a relationship...how?
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Those girls that you've been interested in... Who are they often...? People you don't really know...? Your friends? Acquaintance?Originally posted by Samuelpsw:hi guys...i've always been a failure in managing my own emotions..especially when it comes to BGR...when i wan to like woo a girl and facing quite a num of strong competitors. i will feel scared and wanting to give up cos i will feel that i am nt worthy for her but i will miss her and still in the crossroads of wanting to woo her or not...help mi...and i tend to put lots of feeling when i wan to woo a girl or when i am in a relationship...how?
Different girl likes a different type of guy... If you're interested in someone, I don't see why you should taking the backwards steps unless you've got very valid reasons...?
Also, if you love someone... The least you could do is to give that person the basic form of respect... As in their own choice of whether they would wanna be interested in knowing you better...
It's often okie for you to be full of feelings in a relationship... But it's never really wise to overwhelm yourself with emotional upstirs when you're just interested in someone, especially if you can't keep your mind clear or your actions and thoughts in check... -
i nv show that i am worried or watsoever..but is jus the feelin in my heart makes mi very unconfortable...and i often have no confidence in myself when i see guys that have better qualites than mi also wantin to woo the gal...i feel intimidated...
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I wait for Yun, MC to post. I oso wait for Dev to expand his stuffs.
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I will wait for bonta to post
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Don't think Dev is expanding. Already easliy understood lehOriginally posted by Bontakun:I wait for Yun, MC to post. I oso wait for Dev to expand his stuffs. -
-________________-'''Originally posted by alexkusu:I will wait for bonta to post
& vgal, I believe Dev has more to sae...
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Posted.Originally posted by Bontakun:I wait for Yun, MC to post. I oso wait for Dev to expand his stuffs.v -
*wondering if dev would say "more"Originally posted by Bontakun:-________________-'''
& vgal, I believe Dev has more to sae... 
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eh..Originally posted by M©+square:Posted.v
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-__________________________________________-Originally posted by M©+square:Posted.v -
Posted as well!Originally posted by M©+square:Posted.v
Cheers -
go see if she feels the same way b4 carry on
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XOOriginally posted by Yunhaier:Posted as well!
Cheers
Naw~~~~~~
Liddat how to give sound advices to TS!?
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You have a lotta growing up to do............
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i feel that way too...
i don't think i need to grow up... -
think i am rather a failure in this area of relationship...and i jus cant understand y gals that i like always treat mi as one of their close friends only and nothing more...
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Think of it this way... If you don't even have the confidence for competitions to get the girl of your heart, what makes you think you should have the confidence to keep her...? Even if competitions don't appear during the period which you wish to woo a girl, what if it appears when you're both attached already...? Should you just go "No.. I'm not good enough for her...?" If that's the case, then you probably isn't... Then better if you don't start.... Alternatively, you can try finding a gf who no one else would be interested in or remain single for the rest of your life if you're comfortable with it....Originally posted by Samuelpsw:i nv show that i am worried or watsoever..but is jus the feelin in my heart makes mi very unconfortable...and i often have no confidence in myself when i see guys that have better qualites than mi also wantin to woo the gal...i feel intimidated...
Like I've said earlier... What deem as 'qualities' by you need not be necessarily so in the eyes of the girl you're interested... I'm quite sure you'll have your own 'qualities' if not unique points too...? Try to 'shine' on that... -
Sometimes things just happens to be this way...Originally posted by Samuelpsw:think i am rather a failure in this area of relationship...and i jus cant understand y gals that i like always treat mi as one of their close friends only and nothing more...
Unless there's something really wrong with yourself (it should be quite obvious), otherwise... I won't suggest you think too much over things...? -
Finally Dev expand his postings. No thanks to MC or Yun.......
As for the TS, all I can say is: this is more of something to do with yourself than the other parties. You have low confidence and low self esteem. You feel inferior to others and always have in mind you can never win.
Let me tell you something, all of them feel inferior too. No kidding. They just use what they can do and guts to it do to mask their inferiority. I myself am inferior in many ways. I am bad in studies. I am gullible. I am not that atheletic compared to muscular guys. There are sports I can't do well either. I am not handsome or sexy. Neither am I tall or smart. I am not rich or knowledgeable. I do not even think I can give people a sense of trust or security. BUT I do my best anyway.
We all have inferiorities in ourselves. We acknowledge this fact and make use of these "inferiorities " to learn and further improve our strengths. My strength? Compassion, patience, understanding, forgiving. I know my strengths and I improve them.
Still feel lowly? Cultivate virtues of character and values. Learn to be more patient. Listen to how others behave or express themselves. Observe people around you. Learn to be compassionate and understanding. Learn to be forgiving. With a simple mind and a good heart, we see everything around us in a MUCH simpler and more colourful way and perspective.
Being too emotional? More like your compassion is being too focused on BGR issues where you can use it for others. Like when someone tells you of their problems, you can share their pain as you feel it. You can also share their joy and strengthen relationships with family and friends. Must it be reserved for BGR? You are belittling and limiting your capabilities. You are focusing on something small compared to a bigger picture.
People like you for who and what you are, not what you possess materially. Be strong in character and be open to new things, be it hard to swallow or bitter to taste. We all want love and you possess a gift to give that. Learn more about yourself and discover what you are capable of to help others and not just limit yourself to just BGR alone.
Beers. -
thanks Botankun...actually this recent years, after experiencing some life-transforming phrase of my life...i've seen myself being more helpful..more caring and find that more ppl are coming to mi to confine their problems to me regardless relationship or family...but everyone is the same...we can give advice to others, but when it comes to our own prob, we tend to see the prob as a big big prob when it is only a small prob...this goes the same for me...i know that what i must do and should do, but the thing is that i jus cant take the 1st step to do it...there will be something tat will hinder us in what we wan to do..
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I learnt this from a brother: Everybody has a story to tell. I can listen to other people's issues and problems but it is always ME who deemed MY problems the biggest because it concerns ME.Originally posted by Samuelpsw:thanks Bontakun...actually this recent years, after experiencing some life-transforming phases of my life...i've seen myself being more helpful..more caring and find that more ppl are coming to mi to confide their problems to me regardless relationship or family...but everyone is the same...we can give advice to others, but when it comes to our own prob, we tend to see the prob as a big big prob when it is only a small prob...this goes the same for me...i know that what i must do and should do, but the thing is that i jus cant take the 1st step to do it...there will be something tat will hinder us in what we wan to do..
Its good to know you are improving yourself.
I do want to ask this though: Since you know what to do, what is the thing that hinders you from doing it and why? -
emtional had its good n bad points
if u dun have the slightest emtional ,ur even worse (unsuccessful) when ur with the girl u like
but still every girl has their views -
Is your horoscope a water sign? If it is, then its too bad lor.
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Originally posted by Bontakun:Finally Dev expand his postings. No thanks to MC or Yun.......
As for the TS, all I can say is: this is more of something to do with yourself than the other parties. You have low confidence and low self esteem. You feel inferior to others and always have in mind you can never win.
Let me tell you something, all of them feel inferior too. No kidding. They just use what they can do and guts to it do to mask their inferiority. I myself am inferior in many ways. I am bad in studies. I am gullible. I am not that atheletic compared to muscular guys. There are sports I can't do well either. I am not handsome or sexy. Neither am I tall or smart. I am not rich or knowledgeable. I do not even think I can give people a sense of trust or security. BUT I do my best anyway.
We all have inferiorities in ourselves. We acknowledge this fact and make use of these "inferiorities " to learn and further improve our strengths. My strength? Compassion, patience, understanding, forgiving. I know my strengths and I improve them.
Still feel lowly? Cultivate virtues of character and values. Learn to be more patient. Listen to how others behave or express themselves. Observe people around you. Learn to be compassionate and understanding. Learn to be forgiving. With a simple mind and a good heart, we see everything around us in a MUCH simpler and more colourful way and perspective.
Being too emotional? More like your compassion is being too focused on BGR issues where you can use it for others. Like when someone tells you of their problems, you can share their pain as you feel it. You can also share their joy and strengthen relationships with family and friends. Must it be reserved for BGR? You are belittling and limiting your capabilities. You are focusing on something small compared to a bigger picture.
People like you for who and what you are, not what you possess materially. Be strong in character and be open to new things, be it hard to swallow or bitter to taste. We all want love and you possess a gift to give that. Learn more about yourself and discover what you are capable of to help others and not just limit yourself to just BGR alone.
Beers. 
Why must wait for us to post then you can post ne?
I believe you can also contribute your post as an AA community to assist TS what. It isn't always needed to keep using a certain 'brand' of advice to every topic. As long I feel enough good advices are given, I don't necessary have to post what... not as if yunhaier must rush to have every topic marked with yunhaier's post.
More words doesn't mean more help leh (you see Tankh80 case), although it certainly mean additional perception. Just suffice (dian dao wei zi) will do the job nicely.
Cheers