Interested in girl who is good friend
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I'm interested in this girl who is a relatively good friend of about 5 years from back in JC. We haven't been meeting up that frequently - maybe only 2-3 times a year - but I've also liked her on and off in between that five years. So far, we are not more than good friends (not best friends either) but I'm liking her a lot more each time I meet her and I'm sensing some chemistry between us. Problem is, I don't really know how I should go about telling her I like her. I don't really want make the friendship more awkward but I would like to move on in the relationship with her... How can I go about this?
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Like her on and off???
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Juz let nature tk its course bah
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hire me, i tell her for you
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Pretty tough one this.
Depends i'd say. If you think u can ask her straight out, thats the best. Else, try to get it from her implicitly.
I've been caught in ur situation twice before. One of them was a really good friend when i fell for her, and her for me, but we didn't start an r/s. I sort of told her i fancied her pretty directly and she said she felt the same but we both didn't want an r/s then.
The other girl, we were friends at first, then i told her i fancied her and somehow, we both grew closer after that. We're both attached now but not to each other, but we've become really good friends.
So then, just try to ask her to get as clear an answer as possible, and make ur move before its too late.
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Think first of what you might want out of loving her.
I think its pretty important to realise that loving her doesnt mean she will love u back.
I would think you should make your feelings clear to her, but dont expect anything back.
Make it clear that you will woo her. Good girls arent easy to come by. Grab the chance, b4 u regret it.
What happens ultimately really isnt important. You have tried, and soon, you will know the outcome. It beats living your life not knowing the outcome. "what if i had tried that very day, would i have succeeded?"
You dont want to be asking yourself this at 80 years old. =) -
i got one advice.dont go tell her i love you and screw it up and end up losing a good friend and losing face and pride in front of the girl and you other friends.sometimes,you just cant get what you want so move along and hope for the best
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i guess its infatuation lol. not loveOriginally posted by Patrik:Like her on and off??? -
i suggest u get into a better friendship then now.Originally posted by reve82guy:I'm interested in this girl who is a relatively good friend of about 5 years from back in JC. We haven't been meeting up that frequently - maybe only 2-3 times a year - but I've also liked her on and off in between that five years. So far, we are not more than good friends (not best friends either) but I'm liking her a lot more each time I meet her and I'm sensing some chemistry between us. Problem is, I don't really know how I should go about telling her I like her. I don't really want make the friendship more awkward but I would like to move on in the relationship with her... How can I go about this?
wait until u 2 became v v close frens then the chances are higher.
but not too late also la, if not she attached le -
Sorry for the late replies... had lousy internet at work...Originally posted by Patrik:Like her on and off???
Well, I was away studying at Australia, so whenever I met her back in the holidays I get reminded of how much I liked her. But I didn't want to start anything then coz i didn't feel ready to start with a LDR... now i'm done studying and I hope that this friendship could be more. I know her ok, but I guess not exactly best friends yet. We have fun together, and we've gone out alone with each other before, except mainly as friends only...
The main worry is... I don't want to lose this good friendship, but at the same time I want to take it further... So i'm not sure how I can do this right... -
So, I guess u are back in Spore lah? That's good! Now u can start chasing her liao. As usual lah, ask her out for dinner/movie/stroll along Esplanade/take a riverside boat tour. Let the feelings grow naturally, don't rush anything.Originally posted by reve82guy:Sorry for the late replies... had lousy internet at work...
Well, I was away studying at Australia, so whenever I met her back in the holidays I get reminded of how much I liked her. But I didn't want to start anything then coz i didn't feel ready to start with a LDR... now i'm done studying and I hope that this friendship could be more. I know her ok, but I guess not exactly best friends yet. We have fun together, and we've gone out alone with each other before, except mainly as friends only...
The main worry is... I don't want to lose this good friendship, but at the same time I want to take it further... So i'm not sure how I can do this right...
Most importantly, she got BF or not? -
When you move one level up with her, that level is no longer friendship. If you want friendship, stay where you are.
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this is really tricky.
i liked a good fren of mine and i confessed to him.
he's now attached and i asked myself whether i did the right thing to tell him that i like him.. Yes it's painful but I think it's better than leaving words unsaid.
Perhaps I will distance myself away from him.. perhaps we wun be able to confide in each other anymore.. but we are still frens.
Are you afraid of rejection? Would you rather be rejected or regret not telling her and see her getting attached to someone else? -
that guy must b having some andy lau looks alike.Originally posted by browniebaobao:this is really tricky.
i liked a good fren of mine and i confessed to him.
he's now attached and i asked myself whether i did the right thing to tell him that i like him.. Yes it's painful but I think it's better than leaving words unsaid.
Perhaps I will distance myself away from him.. perhaps we wun be able to confide in each other anymore.. but we are still frens.
Are you afraid of rejection? Would you rather be rejected or regret not telling her and see her getting attached to someone else? -
Hi there TS.Originally posted by reve82guy:I'm interested in this girl who is a relatively good friend of about 5 years from back in JC. We haven't been meeting up that frequently - maybe only 2-3 times a year - but I've also liked her on and off in between that five years. So far, we are not more than good friends (not best friends either) but I'm liking her a lot more each time I meet her and I'm sensing some chemistry between us. Problem is, I don't really know how I should go about telling her I like her. I don't really want make the friendship more awkward but I would like to move on in the relationship with her... How can I go about this?
I would say I was in the same boat totally about a year ago. Just wanna share my experience and maybe let you think what you would like to do. Wont be offering much of an advice here.
I knew her in JC too. Friends for about 4-5 years too before I confess, like seriously to her. It was online thou.
Before I did that, we were like just friends online. Since JC, I have only went out with her once, but we chat very frequently. After JC, we went to the school once and that very night, she blogged and said she had a great time out. I was delighted as any of the guy would be.
Oh yes, did i mention that she is one of the most sought after girl in school?
I decided to head over to poly during my year2 and got into a course of my interest. To my surprise, she started asking me about my course and all. After her As', she came to my course too. When I thought I left it all back in JC, she pop right back into my life, so close to me. And yes, she caused quite a woohaa in poly too.
During this poly time, we chatted alot again. Through sms and online. Met up a few times in school. I was also quite a famous figure in my course due to my CCA and things got around and her classmates started asking if she likes me. She didnt give a affirmative answer but they gathered that it was a "yes".
Wow, what a boost after waiting for 3 years rite?
One of my best friend in poly then urged me to go for it. I did. Online thou. A whimp some of you might say but i did that anyway. And so i said.
Me: "I like you, XXX. For 3 years already... you know?"
XXX: "ya... i guess so..."
Me: "Ya... just want to tell you that... in case you didnt realise..."
XXX: "But I am not sure if I like you as much as you do or more then you do."
Me: "..."
Me: "its ok ba... i actually not expecting too much, its been so long. But I am very happy to hear you saying that already..."
XXX: "haha... like that also so happy already ar..."
bla bla bla...
That the conver I had with her when i told her. Always thought this line is a killer. XXX: "But I am not sure if I like you as much as you do or more then you do."
After that, my friends urge me to go for it. They took it as the feeling is there. But I felt otherwise somehow. *there are other factors holding me back, like religious issues and stuff. I decided to let go.
Now, we are still friends and I am happily together with my gf whom I love alot and I am planning to spend my life with. I am young, I know. But i want my own fairytale to come true and I would work hard for it.
If I have decieded otherwise, I might have been with XXX today. Who knows?
After so much bs... , TS, its up to you if you want to go on with your friend. No such thing as cannot be friends after you confess. You want to try, go ahead. But in case things dun work out the way you wanted, put in extra effort to take care of the friendship.
And the saying goes, there are many trees out there. Don't wait for too long. If after some stages of dating, things dont work out as you would like it to be... move on. You would be happy, like I am now.
JMHO.
Regards. -
i m also kind of stuck in the same situation as TS..same boat..haha
this gal,i hinted here n there sometims,for eg,tell her that i'll be there for her whenever if she needs me..(but i doubt so,coz she has other frens who r closer),call me if she's bored..things like that..she replied sure will..but i dun see this coming..she always give gd responses.. -
That would also have to depend on her mentality....?Originally posted by reve82guy:Sorry for the late replies... had lousy internet at work...
Well, I was away studying at Australia, so whenever I met her back in the holidays I get reminded of how much I liked her. But I didn't want to start anything then coz i didn't feel ready to start with a LDR... now i'm done studying and I hope that this friendship could be more. I know her ok, but I guess not exactly best friends yet. We have fun together, and we've gone out alone with each other before, except mainly as friends only...
The main worry is... I don't want to lose this good friendship, but at the same time I want to take it further... So i'm not sure how I can do this right... -
Put on clothes.Originally posted by Patrik:Like her on and off???
Take off clothes.
You get the drift. -
Thanks for all your responses! It was good to hear from both perspectives... but i think i'm just as confused as ever...
I've spent quite a bit of time with her before, even went holidaying together before, but she always seem to send the signals that we are just good friends and nothing more. the thing is none of the times we went out together were dates, just good friends hanging out.
i enjoy the time i spend with her, so if we are just good friends now, i wonder if it is worth a shot trying out something more than that. coz if that doesn't work out, the friendship might just go out the window.
i know i'm just kinda repeating myself, but maybe that's what i need to get my head a little clearer. coz i dun really know where this friendship/relationship stands now. -
fark friendship. just go after her. u can always find other gals to make frens with.Originally posted by reve82guy:Thanks for all your responses! It was good to hear from both perspectives... but i think i'm just as confused as ever...
I've spent quite a bit of time with her before, even went holidaying together before, but she always seem to send the signals that we are just good friends and nothing more. the thing is none of the times we went out together were dates, just good friends hanging out.
i enjoy the time i spend with her, so if we are just good friends now, i wonder if it is worth a shot trying out something more than that. coz if that doesn't work out, the friendship might just go out the window.
i know i'm just kinda repeating myself, but maybe that's what i need to get my head a little clearer. coz i dun really know where this friendship/relationship stands now.
AFTERALL, once u get attached or married, all other female frenships go down the drain anyway. (u seriously think u're gonna spend time with other gals? or ur gf will let u get close to other gals? between work and family, u'll have little time for anyone else but ur gf)
IMHO, platonic male-female frenship only works if both parties aren't interested. -
Originally posted by FBI:that guy must b having some andy lau looks alike.
far far away from that.