New relationship. New trouble.
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Recently, my best friend got married and I was his 'brother' during the wedding. In his wedding, I got to know the 'sister' of his wife. She was her best friend too. Both of us were attached during then and we both knew each other were attached. Yet despite this known fact, I started to pursue her and she reciprocated.
Thing blossomed between us and very soon, we started to feel for each other. Subsequently we broke up with our partners and got together on valentine's day. It wasn't exactly each other that led to our break ups, but we are definitely part of the reasons.
I have had 5 relationship in the past, and 27 years of age. I have never been much of a feeling person; in fact, I am almost cold blooded. Everything I do always comes with logic and decided via cost benefit analysis. Even if it comes to relationship. In short, I never really felt anything for anyone before. An 'asshole' I may be and I don't deny it.
However, ever since I met her, I began to feel different things. Never in my life had I felt so happy with someone and never had I felt so strong for someone. Both of us, were in the final stages of our relationship. I had applied for a HDB and she had an exec condo. Both our break ups has resulted in very complicated situations.
While i have known her only for 2 month plus, I have already decided to lose my option fee for the HDB and to support the condo with her. I earn enough to do that of course.
Thing were going very well for the past couple of days until her best friend, i.e. my best friend's wife, had a talked with her. Her best friend had felt that our relationship was a rush and urged her to reconsider. It was felt that I am a flirtatious person and would only harm her instead. All in all, our relationship was disapproved by her best friend.
Although she feels otherwise from her best friend, she really treasures the friendship and what her best friend feels matters a lot to her. She has been confused and also dejected being stuck in between me and her best friend.
Being unable to see her so depressed, I gave in. I told her to take her best friend advice and to reconsider our relationship. But this obviously made me felt terrible. So terrible that I have never felt anything like this before. Now I begin to think whether I have made the right choice and what should I do next.
Until now, I still cannot believe that I am actually in this situation. I have never expected it. I wonder why. -
since u like her then let her know u are serious abt her and work hard to build ur new relationship... wat her frens say or anyone dont matter cos its ur actions tat win her... u jz need to confirm tat u urself is reali serious n wanna commit...
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Hey bro, I think you need to prove your friend's wife that you are capable to take care of the girl you like. Time will tell and I believe what you say here is true. Give yourself more time, get to know each other more and then decide.
Wish you luck
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There are terms for the "best friend" roles you played at the wedding - best man and bridesmaid...Originally posted by oorey:Recently, my best friend got married and I was his 'brother' during the wedding. In his wedding, I got to know the 'sister' of his wife. She was her best friend too. Both of us were attached during then and we both knew each other were attached. Yet despite this known fact, I started to pursue her and she reciprocated.
Thing blossomed between us and very soon, we started to feel for each other. Subsequently we broke up with our partners and got together on valentine's day. It wasn't exactly each other that led to our break ups, but we are definitely part of the reasons.
I have had 5 relationship in the past, and 27 years of age. I have never been much of a feeling person; in fact, I am almost cold blooded. Everything I do always comes with logic and decided via cost benefit analysis. Even if it comes to relationship. In short, I never really felt anything for anyone before. An 'asshole' I may be and I don't deny it.
However, ever since I met her, I began to feel different things. Never in my life had I felt so happy with someone and never had I felt so strong for someone. Both of us, were in the final stages of our relationship. I had applied for a HDB and she had an exec condo. Both our break ups has resulted in very complicated situations.
While i have known her only for 2 month plus, I have already decided to lose my option fee for the HDB and to support the condo with her. I earn enough to do that of course.
Thing were going very well for the past couple of days until her best friend, i.e. my best friend's wife, had a talked with her. Her best friend had felt that our relationship was a rush and urged her to reconsider. It was felt that I am a flirtatious person and would only harm her instead. All in all, our relationship was disapproved by her best friend.
Although she feels otherwise from her best friend, she really treasures the friendship and what her best friend feels matters a lot to her. She has been confused and also dejected being stuck in between me and her best friend.
Being unable to see her so depressed, I gave in. I told her to take her best friend advice and to reconsider our relationship. But this obviously made me felt terrible. So terrible that I have never felt anything like this before. Now I begin to think whether I have made the right choice and what should I do next.
Until now, I still cannot believe that I am actually in this situation. I have never expected it. I wonder why.
Ok, on to the serious issue. How sure are you the bridesmaid you're wooing is actually mature enough to settle down? More importantly, are you sure you can live with someone who can be so indecisive and emotionally over-reliant on others?
No disrespect, but I'm not sure if it bodes too well for you to have someone whose opinions can be so easily swayed by someone else (nevermind if that's her best friend or mother, really) for a wife. -
ask her slowly, dun ask too much if not u will be a nuisance to her.....happen to my fren who ask too much
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Stay in firm in what you've done and the move you've made.Originally posted by oorey:Recently, my best friend got married and I was his 'brother' during the wedding. In his wedding, I got to know the 'sister' of his wife. She was her best friend too. Both of us were attached during then and we both knew each other were attached. Yet despite this known fact, I started to pursue her and she reciprocated.
Thing blossomed between us and very soon, we started to feel for each other. Subsequently we broke up with our partners and got together on valentine's day. It wasn't exactly each other that led to our break ups, but we are definitely part of the reasons.
I have had 5 relationship in the past, and 27 years of age. I have never been much of a feeling person; in fact, I am almost cold blooded. Everything I do always comes with logic and decided via cost benefit analysis. Even if it comes to relationship. In short, I never really felt anything for anyone before. An 'asshole' I may be and I don't deny it.
However, ever since I met her, I began to feel different things. Never in my life had I felt so happy with someone and never had I felt so strong for someone. Both of us, were in the final stages of our relationship. I had applied for a HDB and she had an exec condo. Both our break ups has resulted in very complicated situations.
While i have known her only for 2 month plus, I have already decided to lose my option fee for the HDB and to support the condo with her. I earn enough to do that of course.
Thing were going very well for the past couple of days until her best friend, i.e. my best friend's wife, had a talked with her. Her best friend had felt that our relationship was a rush and urged her to reconsider. It was felt that I am a flirtatious person and would only harm her instead. All in all, our relationship was disapproved by her best friend.
Although she feels otherwise from her best friend, she really treasures the friendship and what her best friend feels matters a lot to her. She has been confused and also dejected being stuck in between me and her best friend.
Being unable to see her so depressed, I gave in. I told her to take her best friend advice and to reconsider our relationship. But this obviously made me felt terrible. So terrible that I have never felt anything like this before. Now I begin to think whether I have made the right choice and what should I do next.
Until now, I still cannot believe that I am actually in this situation. I have never expected it. I wonder why.
Every decision results in one consequence or another. -
Originally posted by oorey:Recently, my best friend got married and I was his 'brother' during the wedding. In his wedding, I got to know the 'sister' of his wife. She was her best friend too. Both of us were attached during then and we both knew each other were attached. Yet despite this known fact, I started to pursue her and she reciprocated.
Thing blossomed between us and very soon, we started to feel for each other. Subsequently we broke up with our partners and got together on valentine's day. It wasn't exactly each other that led to our break ups, but we are definitely part of the reasons.
I have had 5 relationship in the past, and 27 years of age. I have never been much of a feeling person; in fact, I am almost cold blooded. Everything I do always comes with logic and decided via cost benefit analysis. Even if it comes to relationship. In short, I never really felt anything for anyone before. An 'asshole' I may be and I don't deny it.
However, ever since I met her, I began to feel different things. Never in my life had I felt so happy with someone and never had I felt so strong for someone. Both of us, were in the final stages of our relationship. I had applied for a HDB and she had an exec condo. Both our break ups has resulted in very complicated situations.
While i have known her only for 2 month plus, I have already decided to lose my option fee for the HDB and to support the condo with her. I earn enough to do that of course.
Thing were going very well for the past couple of days until her best friend, i.e. my best friend's wife, had a talked with her. Her best friend had felt that our relationship was a rush and urged her to reconsider. It was felt that I am a flirtatious person and would only harm her instead. All in all, our relationship was disapproved by her best friend.
Although she feels otherwise from her best friend, she really treasures the friendship and what her best friend feels matters a lot to her. She has been confused and also dejected being stuck in between me and her best friend.
Being unable to see her so depressed, I gave in. I told her to take her best friend advice and to reconsider our relationship. But this obviously made me felt terrible. So terrible that I have never felt anything like this before. Now I begin to think whether I have made the right choice and what should I do next.
Until now, I still cannot believe that I am actually in this situation. I have never expected it. I wonder why.
This is a very interesting case because things just happened, applying to both. I must say that eventually, both of you exhibited the same set of vulnerabilities and cracks, in which the negative trait attracted one another on higher subconscious level and coupled with haste, it brought about such huge drastic changes to your love relationship.
It's like making bold decision/s that would probably shock the entire world, but you seemed to know what you are doing.
We attract the qualities we exude - CloUdiSm.
Chances are, there are dissatisfaction in both relationship, creating a suppressed desire to liberalize your current status quo, probably the result of the then-nature of both now-defunct relationship. I can't say that this feeling you are having will withstand the test of time because it's still too early to stamp promise. (Of course if this is largely Uranus-influenced, it will probably not sustain).
If her appearance in your life could easily destroy your then-relationship, it probably revealed that the relationship, in the first place, doesn't hold much value. Looking from higher altitude - I would say that her appearance in your life is likely a reflection of your then-inane-relationship, suggesting to you - not because she is The One - but because your then-relationship is probably is already journey in trouble waters to Hades, in which why you two would readily accept each other, despite being attached to different partners separately.
Her presence acts as a catalysis to show you the discontentment and dissatisfaction you had in your then-relationship.
If I put one spoilt orange with another that is decaying - in comparison, the spoilt orange may appear a better choice to you, but not necessarily a better choice when you consumed it.
Think about it.
Cheers -
if you really like this gal,
Prove to her and her bestfriend... prove it to them that you have changed.
tell her... you can reconsider but at least give me a chance to prove my case... -
Don't worry, your sincerity will win her and your best friend's wife over..
Btw, your best friend useless one ar? Ask his wife to eat more and talk less c0ck. -
come clean with her about your past and reaffirm your commitment to her....it's natural for her to feel insecure after her best friend's advice of caution. you need to address the issue of being flirtatious and assure her that u are serious about having a future with her.
i'm no expert but that seems the best thing to do in my opinion -
X 2. My point to be deciphered....Originally posted by smudgey:if you really like this gal,
Prove to her and her bestfriend... prove it to them that you have changed.
tell her... you can reconsider but at least give me a chance to prove my case...
But can be tricky if that girl is one with too much uncertainties and doubts on her mind....
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Thanks guys for the encouragement and advice. I have somehow managed to assure my girlfriend, but something new and absurd popped up. Please refer to this thread http://www.sgforums.com/?action=thread_display&thread_id=239548.
Sorry for the trouble and thanks again. -
Do you flirt around? are those accusation groundless?Originally posted by oorey:Thanks guys for the encouragement and advice. I have somehow managed to assure my girlfriend, but something new and absurd popped up. Please refer to this thread http://www.sgforums.com/?action=thread_display&thread_id=239548.
Sorry for the trouble and thanks again. -
you fool.. you fell into the "gossip squad" trap.. never let what other ppl say affect your love.. asking her to reconsider your relationship will HURT her.. she obviously thinks OTHERWISE and trusts you.. now it is YOU who doesnt trust her when you know about this.. she must've thought that you trusted her feelings for you enuff to not have to reconsider your relationship.. go apologise to her and continue your beautiful relationship.. your love story is truly beautiful, do not let what other ppl say affect your judgement.. especially when it involves her.. get her back soon ok?