Damn m i reali an introvert??
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hmm everytime theres like a gathering wif ppl im not particularly close wif,like collegues etc i feel nervous..
do u guys feel it too or u all juz feel like its going out wif normal friends?
anything i can do to feel better? to feel more extrovert? -
simple
tell yourself, you don't care about what others think of you
i think therefore i am -
go out more often with friends to crowded places.
try walking stomach-in, chest-out. soldier posture they call it.
u'll look a lot smarter. -
That's not introvertness la.
You just need to be flexible, adaptive and happy!
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You ahev very low self-esteem?
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hmmm its like i sometimes feel ppl dun reali like toking to me,like they find me boring etc..
but many times i just cant find topics to talk about.. -
simple
yup correct... LIke excercising...lose fat and weight...Maintain the way without ohearing otther people trying to crticize you...Slowly as you grow to look better...They will shut up one...
tell yourself, you don't care about what others think of you
i think therefore i am -
I think u feel nervous coz u dunno wat to say. Anyways if they are new colleagues, u would hardly know wat they like = dunno wat they like. And what they like, may be the most boring thing to u. Just hang in there bah....actually I am in exactly the same situation, but wat they like = what I hate, so I hardly lunch with them. Hearing wat their child ate last nite, what they child did last nite = mental torture to me
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1. When out with people you are not close with, it is normal to feel:
a. Bored ... if they are boring
b. Horny ... if someone is cute
c. Entertained ... if they are entertaining
and so on.
However, nervousness is not normal. One might feel nervous if they are doing something that makes you nervous, but if you aren't close to them then you shouldn't choose to be in their company anyway.
2. Despite what people like to think, it is rather difficult to change one's personality; not impossible, just very difficult. What people perceive as confidence is frequently an outward display of lack of self consciousness or inability/deliberate avoidance of seeing things from the perspective of others.
To anyone who thinks that you can have a personality other than that which you have developed naturally, I pose the following question: what if someone told themself that they will be a person that proves that claim false?
Whether they succeed or fail, the claim is will be false.
3. You are asking if you are really an introvert on an internet forum (sgforums, no less). I can't say for certain, but I can make a good guess at the answer. -
i feel the same way when i go out with school friends
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sometimes i feel nervous also, i wonder if people can be so natural and at ease all the time.
i mean i will worry if they ask me certain question or whether i will say the wrong things sometimes. -
Forget the whole thing and moved on...
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dun worry, be happy..
just be natural..
ppl can see when u are unnatural and nervous -
Hmmmm i never liked crowds and high profile people....coz...i just find them irritating and they don't have a mind of their own? People do they do? Hahaha....
Yesh that makes me quite an introvert...
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Just be yourself ba. Unless you are trying to meet some expectations you have set for yourself or by them, there's no reason for such a big lack of confidence de ba... Or else, you have to learn to believe in yourself more? Diff freq, then move on ba. Jia you!
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i don't think you're an introvert...
introverts are worse than that. -
introverts keep things to themselves, and never socialise...
at least you did..
i think the best cure, is either u give such gathering a miss, or u have someone who you feel comfortable with, to be at the gathering too.. then you can always chat back to the person when you feel lonely or out of place.
The problem with such gathering is, if you miss it, people will say you are AS, and you miss the chance of getting to know them better, and whatever gossips or news they might be discussing.
If you go, but u dont really know them, you will feel out of place. But try breaking the ice abit, slowly. Not easy, but not that hard. I know people who can just sit in a group he/she just know, and chat as if they had been friends for quite sometime...
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yes yes i agree wif u dark ice!! but anyways to help me blend in? cuz once some1 frm that grp sorta dominates the discussion,i'll be left alone..veri hard to 'break' into the conversation.
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you have social anxiety. thats different from being introverted
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Could it be panic attack more than you being introvert?Originally posted by kb24:hmm everytime theres like a gathering wif ppl im not particularly close wif,like collegues etc i feel nervous..
do u guys feel it too or u all juz feel like its going out wif normal friends?
anything i can do to feel better? to feel more extrovert? -
erm its not THAT bad la, anxiety dun describe wat i feel. Its juz that i always cant find any interesting topic to talk about,so i think people find me boring.
Cuz its impt to be yourself rite? So i am boring naturally mah,if not i have to act interesting by talking alot,which isnt myself -
Well, you SHARE and talk about the interesting things (popular ones) you do.Originally posted by kb24:erm its not THAT bad la, anxiety dun describe wat i feel. Its juz that i always cant find any interesting topic to talk about,so i think people find me boring.
Cuz its impt to be yourself rite? So i am boring naturally mah,if not i have to act interesting by talking alot,which isnt myself -
It is much easier to start a conversation with a stranger if you can "feel their vibes" and talk to them in an area they are familiar with.Originally posted by kb24:but anyways to help me blend in? cuz once some1 frm that grp sorta dominates the discussion,i'll be left alone..veri hard to 'break' into the conversation.
Before you talk to strangers, pay attention to their feelings and ask yourself,
" What will I feel if I am that person"
" What will I feel if I am in that situation"
Feel the vibe
You are at a party, quite a few of the guests in your group are in the accounting profession.
Imagine what it is like to be an accountant.
Tight deadlines, plenty of reports to analyze, facing the calculator everyday...
After introducing yourself, simply look at them, smile and say, " What a crazy job you have...accountants in my company are usually the last to leave the office!"
Gauge their response and go with it.
Start a conversation in an area/situation they are familiar with
You are at a bookstore. You see a girl holding a few novels in her hands.
Imagine you are in her shoes, what could she be thinking now?
Walk up to her, smile and say this as if you already know her,
"I read this one last week, it's so enjoyable I'm going to read it again."
Gauge her response and go with it.
How well you can keep the conversation going after the ice-breaker depends on how well you can listen.
Listening is not a passive skill.
Learn to listen actively what has been told as if they are bits and pieces of that person's character. That will help you to understand and relate to the person easier. -
i am only a introvert when i am wif gals
