Is r/s so fragile??
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My fran's bf juz ended their r/s after 1 yr over some stupid issue.. looking at wat happened, it really made me wonder is it juz so ez for someone to juz say goodbye like tt??
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i also feel so....hai...isit that guys nowadays lack a VERY impt thing known as sense of responsibility and commitment?Originally posted by AsTr0GiRL:My fran's bf juz ended their r/s after 1 yr over some stupid issue.. looking at wat happened, it really made me wonder is it juz so ez for someone to juz say goodbye like tt??
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Not really, some girls lack a sense of responsibility and committment too.Originally posted by hopy:i also feel so....hai...isit that guys nowadays lack a VERY impt thing known as sense of responsibility and commitment? -
tt's too general.
if we only listen to the view of the gal's part to give a virdict, dun u think it's kinda unfair for the guy? wad bout the guy's side of view? maybe it's becoz of many other problems that causes them to break up? -
Actually I personally feel that its due to the lack of communication and wrong meaning interpreted....
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If it ended over such a small issue.It shows that the persons involved were not committed in the 1st place,ehehe
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People these days are less patient with problems in relations comparing to older days. Divorce happens once every 3 marriage because people are unable to give and take, unable to close one eye, unable to tolerate.
But seriously speaking, before marriage, breaking up is not neccessary a bad thing because sometimes both parties may be unsuitable for each other. Two people not unsuitable for each other being together is quite a painful thing.
1 year onli? I known of one case 7 years together and break. -
morals are somewhat down the drain compared to our forefathers..
then again if men were to act like our forefathers, we'd be termed MCPs...
anyway... i seem to keep repeating myself but nevermind, for the benefit of everyone that's bothered enuff to read:
it doesn't matter wat "all guys" or "all girls" are like.. all u need is to find that ONE... and it's enuff. if u are happee in a reln and he/she is so wonderful, then who gives a shit about the rest of the pple out there? no point feeling so "disappointed with the world"...
if u're single, then dun lose hope that u may find someone like that.. then u better make sure u keep ur end of the bargain and treat him/her right.
having said all that i also believe one thing:
Good people can create a bad relationship, even though they both dearly want the relationship to succeed. -
A r/ship needs the nurture from both parties......
i'd like to be Fair in this case to the guy....
the one to initiate a break-up may not necessarily be the ONE at fault, reckon the initiation shows the existence of a certain problem tt needs the attention of both parties to look into & hopefully be solving it. It's a BIG problem tt jeopardize the present r/ship....
.depending on how one perceives, it may well be a step nearer to knowing each other since couples r usually too used to having each other & pay little attention to the r/ship. Of course, im not saying tt initiating break-ups is a GD IDEA but humans tend to realize & detect the 'differences' when things they have all the while r slipping away...... 
Everyone handles break-ups differently, who knows.....break-ups in some rae cases may juz allow the couples to know the problems in their r/ships. Thus, if they r able to survive this 'Challenge'.......the next to come (choy! touch wood lah!) may be alot easier to deal with or even not be having a 'next' break-up
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sometimes to go separate ways will be happier for both parties
there are circumstances tt we do no know and should not speculate....
u can only trust couples to able to handle their own rship....and they themselves know wat is best for both.... -
If it is destinated to end, it'll have to end no matter what... The HARD way or the EASY one.....Originally posted by AsTr0GiRL:My fran's bf juz ended their r/s after 1 yr over some stupid issue.. looking at wat happened, it really made me wonder is it juz so ez for someone to juz say goodbye like tt?? -
Well.. it's easy to say gdbye to a relationship if the guy has no commitment and wans to end it fast.. rite?Originally posted by AsTr0GiRL:My fran's bf juz ended their r/s after 1 yr over some stupid issue.. looking at wat happened, it really made me wonder is it juz so ez for someone to juz say goodbye like tt??
Guys lack commitment.. it's true
Had a fren whose bf broke up wif her after 5 yrs.. he told her tt's bcos he is too bz.. actual fact, he's seeing someone behind her back..
Isn't tt lack of commitment and responsibilty?
How mani pple can commit and be responsible for relationships tt do not work out?
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Relationships don't come easily ...
However it takes just a minute to destroy everything ...
Everything in the world is fragile.... instead of crying over spilled milk...why not treasure what u have now cos u wont know when u going to loose them ... -
it's true that r/s dun come easy nowadays,it needs alot of understanding,communication etc to be done.but sometimes,it's better to saygdbye to each other whenever u realised that u can't be 2gether.Unlike mi n my bf,we've been together for abt 7 yrs,soetimes we quarrel until so jia lat tt i wana break but i did not in the end...coz i duno i refuse to break is because i still ove him as much as i did in the past or juz because i can't bear to give up the number of yrs we've been 2gether as we've been so used 2 seeing each other and havinf each other....
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Originally posted by hopy:i also feel so....hai...isit that guys nowadays lack a VERY impt thing known as sense of responsibility and commitment?
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This thread was like a few mths back liao but since it was dug up, i shall juz add another 2cents worth of thots...
I realised that most pple r forgetting what love really is all about... They can say I love u to a person when he/she barely know each other... What they have could be juz a crush or a liking.. Thou it may proceed from there, but if you dun even understand a person, how can you love that person? When love is taken out of a r/s, one will realise that wat holds a couple together is companionship, gotten too used to each other or maybe even responsibility and no longer love... Where have all the love gone to?? Have most pple really forgotten how to love anymore?? -
if he reli can end it so easily i guess b4hand he oreadi start to lose feeling 4 ur frenx liao. . .guesss tis small issuse is juz an xcuseOriginally posted by AsTr0GiRL:My fran's bf juz ended their r/s after 1 yr over some stupid issue.. looking at wat happened, it really made me wonder is it juz so ez for someone to juz say goodbye like tt?? -
but once the flames has die & feeling r gone wif the wind dat nutin u can do. . .Originally posted by hopy:i also feel so....hai...isit that guys nowadays lack a VERY impt thing known as sense of responsibility and commitment?
if luv is lost u cannot force it but juz wait 4 it to return but if it dun den u hv to face it n move on -
People nowadays have many other obligations... Especially when times are bad like now... Love can be highly contagious, and be spread.... If you so desire for it, you can actually teach your partner to love... Not by theories and words alone but by ACTIONs.... Let him understand and SENSE it... As long as he's not too absorbed into other business, this act is highly probable.....Originally posted by AsTr0GiRL:This thread was like a few mths back liao but since it was dug up, i shall juz add another 2cents worth of thots...
I realised that most pple r forgetting what love really is all about... They can say I love u to a person when he/she barely know each other... What they have could be juz a crush or a liking.. Thou it may proceed from there, but if you dun even understand a person, how can you love that person? When love is taken out of a r/s, one will realise that wat holds a couple together is companionship, gotten too used to each other or maybe even responsibility and no longer love... Where have all the love gone to?? Have most pple really forgotten how to love anymore??
So quit complaining why LOVE ain't dropping from the heavens above.... Go FIND it... If you can't really do that, CREATE it.... In order to TAKE, you'll have to GIVE your share.... But don't expect the return to come in proportion of an investment rate as love don't work that way...... -
are u looking for a companion? lover? provider(of anything)???
if u are looking for a companion, usually, ur understanding of the other half is weak, because all u want is someone to be there for u, whether ur feelings are strong or not with ur companion, u won't understand what goes on in his/her life... and when there's some arguements, usually, it's a small matter blown big....
if u are looking for a provider, u juz want someone there to give u all u want, whatever it is, money, or sex, u juz demand material things, hence understanding of the person is next to nil, unlike companion.............
if u are looking for a lover, u'll find that u are the one sacrificing things, not DEMANDING things, and u know every single thing abt ur lover, and of course, if ur lover falls in the above 2 catagories, u find that it's very hard to communicate with him/her, and when u point out sumthing in his/her life, it often ends up as a dispute....
whatever i typed above, is based on my POV -
i agree with uOriginally posted by xavier1979:Not really, some girls lack a sense of responsibility and committment too.
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hmm.... hope that i am wrong.... but wat i feel nowadays.... ppl like us... tense to get into a r/ship so fast that u end it urself u also wont noe it..... one of the most impt reason i believe its becos we nowadays had become lazier... we tense to skip the "knowing period" and straight away get into the so called "loving stage" and that is y they can say : i love u.... i will marry u etc.....Originally posted by AsTr0GiRL:This thread was like a few mths back liao but since it was dug up, i shall juz add another 2cents worth of thots...
I realised that most pple r forgetting what love really is all about... They can say I love u to a person when he/she barely know each other... What they have could be juz a crush or a liking.. Thou it may proceed from there, but if you dun even understand a person, how can you love that person? When love is taken out of a r/s, one will realise that wat holds a couple together is companionship, gotten too used to each other or maybe even responsibility and no longer love... Where have all the love gone to?? Have most pple really forgotten how to love anymore??
but when the time gets longer..... one of the party will start to realised that he/she is actually not the one for him/her..... and they initiate break up.... thats y ppl broke off so easily even if they ever said that they love their partner?
and this is wat i posted b4.... =)
personally, i feel that for mi to say : i love u... its quite diff....
unless me and her had already develop a kinda r/ship that have already mature.... thou i dun really noe wat is mature... but i think mature maybe got to do with whether hv already develop things like
1. telepathy
2. understanding
3. compromising and of cos not forgetting
4. being together.
maybe till that time i might be able to really understand and to let her noe that i had already develop love for her and not only likings. but thats the danger part also.... if u ever love a person.... means that u already in too deep.... if any failure in the future.... sure diff to get over... and definately will need some time to recover.... and the side effects is when u start another r/ship.... u will be hv some kinda phobia.... u will tense to be more protective and gif less to the other party.... that's how i feel....
any comments anyone?