Mmerc2000, having read all your post I just marvelled at the way you handle your r/s so far. Professional is just underated - Unbelieveably Impersonal.
I do not know what you mean and how you understand the term "respecting people's privacy", but I can tell you this - you know next to nothing. You need to really understand that a person may sometimes feel uncomfortable sharing upfront not only with you but others as well especially such pasts. So what is there to feel uncomfortable about? We are just born imperfect and we do not handle secrets well enough not to affect our thinking and conduct. Remember we are not God, that is gracious and all understanding. You may be a professional and a generous civic conscious individual but in a relationship it is not like your work and charities. It needs a thing beyond professionalism - personal touch.
Besides for her to share those events would really require time and enough confidence in you. I am sure with your involvements in those institutions of Single Mothers and Wayward Females, you would have understood these complexities and relating problems they faced. Sad, to say I found this lacking. Don't know your purpose of involving yourself with such organizations??!! You might as well shelve your involvement there and spend more time with other more profitable pursuits. I cannot help draw a conclusion that you are 1 individual that cannot afford to loose and everything needs a equal and opposite payback.
I hope that W is not on different wave and/or frequency that you are on the path of a casual r/s. I think you will need to communicate this as your r/s with her parents and your current presence can be easily misunderstood by others especially W. So if you are still not ready to take this r/s to the next level then I think you will need to be responsible enough to put this into proper perspective. Save hurting another individual.
Loving is learning to love an imperfect person perfectly
so she msian ah?