Does your bf/gf mind?
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if u are the only girl going out with a boy..betta forget it
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Now, ask yourself how come you have so many MALE friends wanting to hang out with ONLY YOU? With no one else in tow? I'm assuming they know you're attached, but as long as you're not married, some guys think of you as fair game, ready to snatch you from your bf. Heck, even married wives get 'snatched' away at times. Sometimes, it's not the gf's fault, but rather the lecherous guys posing as 'friends' to get closer, first emotionally then physically. With guys always on the prowl for any defenseless chick, how can any sane bf just let his gf hang out with just any other guy? And letting the two go together? The thing is, I believe your bf is right. He trusts you, being his gf, but not your friend. People are very deceptive, as evidenced in friends cheating one another. Just because you were told by your friend that it's "just an outing to meet up" does NOT mean your friend actually thinks of it so. Beware, he may have ulterior motives in mind. Also, pardon me, but why would you rather forgo a weekend date with your bf for another male friend? Shouldn't you as a gf be spending more time with your bf? While you must never 'kill' off your friendships for the sake of your bf, there should be a consensus between you two to spend more time together. After all, bf and gf should be close right? As they say, out of sight, out of mind, so spend more time together while you can. Well, if going out with that friend can't be helped, try talking to your partner. Let him know that you still love him very much, and SHOW him (not just planting sugarcanes on the lips, to quote a Malay proverb, i.e. lipservice). If you keep quiet to prevent misunderstandings, you better know that if he FINDS OUT (even if no hanky panky takes place), he will NOT like it. And there goes whatever little trust you may have left. Now, as for your platonic friend...you have said both are only free on Saturdays...so who is MORE IMPORTANT? Is your platonic friend close enough to warrant an outing between only you two? If you're only gonna meet that friend once in a blue moon, forget it. These people come and go anyway. Focus on those who matter more, your BF.
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No...won't mind*
*But there are some whom we DO mind. Just have to start trusting your spouse.
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I made it very clear that no one-to-one outing is allowed. So far both of us have managed to stick to it.
And yea, sometimes it is not that we do not trust our partner, it is more like we do not trust the other party. Maybe for me, it is hard for me to find it in my heart to trust someone I am not really close with. But it is hard to put that across without the partner seeing it as you are not trusting him instead.
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Originally posted by qlqq9:
Men, guys oh men!!!! bf does not like me go out at all let alone going out with guys, sigh!
your bf seems to controlling your freedom.. to me , that is not forgiveable for guy to control their gal's freedom..u sure u like that? if u dun like, dun just back off and keep quiet.. tell him that your not a thing or a pet to control, he should respect your personal freedom also
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jealous is proof that he lub u
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Originally posted by Zarks:
your bf seems to controlling your freedom.. to me , that is not forgiveable for guy to control their gal's freedom..u sure u like that? if u dun like, dun just back off and keep quiet.. tell him that your not a thing or a pet to control, he should respect your personal freedom also
Thank you. He is just insecure. Any way, I ignore his control. He is one who likes to tell me " You must listen to me and blah blah blah ......." I also ignore this.
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Bear in mind, TS.
I know one of my frens that had his bf controlling her freedom.. No Outing at all.. not even outing with collegues of both genders. Reason of his bf is afraid guy will flirt her !!! LOL..pathetic bf..
Considered TS , u lucky enough that your boy trusted u and giving u personal freedom.
and i forgot to comment bout Saturday outing.. are u thinking of going out with which guy ? THE guy or your bf? Is that what u mean? Gosh,, no one need to think whom to choose to go out with together but your loved one. If u really have this thinking, there is something wrong with u honestly..
and outing for bowling just the 2 of u is still too much for me IMO. need to go bowling to CHILL out? If misses each other ,then just go yamcha or dinner, goin to bowling means having fun together, What would ur bf think if u go BOWLIng with the guy? I bet if u tell your bf bout this bowling with only one guy, he will definately think "why dont u go bowling with me instead but with that guy? Am i that boring to you? Why r u willing to spend more time with THE guy than me?"
No wonder u thinking of telling or not to your bf... I see..
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Originally posted by qlqq9:
Thank you. He is just insecure. Any way, I ignore his control. He is one who likes to tell me " You must listen to me and blah blah blah ......." I also ignore this.
tell him, you're not his maid.. tell him u got your own freedom and you never go dating with other guys anyway, its just outing with frens.Tell him to have confidence in himself.. if not why u pick him in the 1st place.. let him think bout this.
Gosh i got one fren who has this kind of bf for 7 years.. i hope you r/s never continue like this for so long.. hope he can understand that u neeed some freedom.
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Originally posted by Zarks:
tell him, you're not his maid.. tell him u got your own freedom and you never go dating with other guys anyway, its just outing with frens.Tell him to have confidence in himself.. if not why u pick him in the 1st place.. let him think bout this.
Gosh i got one fren who has this kind of bf for 7 years.. i hope you r/s never continue like this for so long.. hope he can understand that u neeed some freedom.
No worry, can break with him any moment. He is sicko leh, told him I went for gathering but still purposely called my home to check on me. This fellow is full of crap and flirtatious himself.
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Originally posted by Zarks:
Bear in mind, TS.
I know one of my frens that had his bf controlling her freedom.. No Outing at all.. not even outing with collegues of both genders. Reason of his bf is afraid guy will flirt her !!! LOL..pathetic bf..
Considered TS , u lucky enough that your boy trusted u and giving u personal freedom.
and i forgot to comment bout Saturday outing.. are u thinking of going out with which guy ? THE guy or your bf? Is that what u mean? Gosh,, no one need to think whom to choose to go out with together but your loved one. If u really have this thinking, there is something wrong with u honestly..
and outing for bowling just the 2 of u is still too much for me IMO. need to go bowling to CHILL out? If misses each other ,then just go yamcha or dinner, goin to bowling means having fun together, What would ur bf think if u go BOWLIng with the guy? I bet if u tell your bf bout this bowling with only one guy, he will definately think "why dont u go bowling with me instead but with that guy? Am i that boring to you? Why r u willing to spend more time with THE guy than me?"
No wonder u thinking of telling or not to your bf... I see..
I promised my friend in the first place already, and I intend to meet my bf on sunday but turns out he's only free on sat too. That caused the problem. That's why I dunno whether I should keep to my promise to my friend or place my priority to my bf first.
If I don't even care about my bf, why do u think I decided to cancel my meetup with my friend just to be with my bf?
Bowling is too much? U might as well say dinner is too much too, since there's eye to eye contact while eating. -.-
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Originally posted by Miss Tiny:
I promised my friend in the first place already, and I intend to meet my bf on sunday but turns out he's only free on sat too. That caused the problem. That's why I dunno whether I should keep to my promise to my friend or place my priority to my bf first.
If I don't even care about my bf, why do u think I decided to cancel my meetup with my friend just to be with my bf?
Bowling is too much? U might as well say dinner is too much too, since there's eye to eye contact while eating. -.-
Perhaps, you would like to evaluate your relationship with your bf. There must be something that cause you not to care about your bf. -
Originally posted by qlqq9:
Perhaps, you would like to evaluate your relationship with your bf. There must be something that cause you not to care about your bf.What makes u think so?
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Slap ur boyfriend and say "wake up lar i so chio sure got a lot guy jio one right ?"
LOl see wat he say
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Originally posted by Miss Tiny:
What makes u think so?
hello, miss, base on what you said below:
If I don't even care about my bf, why do u think I decided to cancel my meetup with my friend just to be with my bf?
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Originally posted by qlqq9:
hello, miss, base on what you said below:
If I don't even care about my bf, why do u think I decided to cancel my meetup with my friend just to be with my bf?
Hello, do u understand the meaning of my words at all?
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Originally posted by Miss Tiny:
Hello, do u understand the meaning of my words at all?
Perhaps, it is the way you phrase your sentence. So if you wish, then just clarify if not it is OK. -
Originally posted by Miss Tiny:
I promised my friend in the first place already, and I intend to meet my bf on sunday but turns out he's only free on sat too. That caused the problem. That's why I dunno whether I should keep to my promise to my friend or place my priority to my bf first.
If I don't even care about my bf, why do u think I decided to cancel my meetup with my friend just to be with my bf?
Bowling is too much? U might as well say dinner is too much too, since there's eye to eye contact while eating. -.-
hm ok. since u promised your fren, then u can do something bout it.. if possible ask your bf together with bowling since u wanted to meet them both too. YOur bf wont worry much too as he can see what is the guy doing or the way the guy talks to u. Should u consider this option? If you think its ok, try talk to your bf too. If he dont wanna go, then i also duno wat to do.. But at least he would appreciate it very much cuz u at least invited him together. This action of yours alone already let him thinking that u never go out with the guy quietly. If im your bf, i would appreciate it very much and i can trust u more even if im not goin bowling with another guy.
Whatever it is, Miss Tiny, i beg u just dont cheat on him even a small matter. If hes asking ur frens name or anything, just tell. There should be no secret from both of you.
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Originally posted by qlqq9:
Perhaps, it is the way you phrase your sentence. So if you wish, then just clarify if not it is OK.Sorry if I didn't phrase it properly.
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Originally posted by Zarks:
hm ok. since u promised your fren, then u can do something bout it.. if possible ask your bf together with bowling since u wanted to meet them both too. YOur bf wont worry much too as he can see what is the guy doing or the way the guy talks to u. Should u consider this option? If you think its ok, try talk to your bf too. If he dont wanna go, then i also duno wat to do.. But at least he would appreciate it very much cuz u at least invited him together. This action of yours alone already let him thinking that u never go out with the guy quietly. If im your bf, i would appreciate it very much and i can trust u more even if im not goin bowling with another guy.
Good suggestion.
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Originally posted by qlqq9:
No worry, can break with him any moment. He is sicko leh, told him I went for gathering but still purposely called my home to check on me. This fellow is full of crap and flirtatious himself.
honestly, your guy just dont have confidence in himself and to you. any r/s deserves honesty and toleration. But im proud of u fighting for your own freedom and at least u already told him the truth, and yea hes a sick person to still doubt u. Seems like anything that comes out from your mouth are not trustable in his ears.
By judging your actions, it seems u cant tolerate him anymore. Give him some chance then if he never change for good, then better dun waste time for you and him too.
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It may sound like a good suggestion to bring my bf along, but I find it weird. More or less, one person will feel neglected because they dunno each other at all, and my bf is those type who is shy and doesn't talk much.
I find this situation awkward and not the ideal type of outing I would like. This has nothing to do with giving my bf a chance to know my friend or not.
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Originally posted by Miss Tiny:
It may sound like a good suggestion to bring my bf along, but I find it weird. More or less, one person will feel neglected because they dunno each other at all, and my bf is those type who is shy and doesn't talk much.
I find this situation awkward and not the ideal type of outing I would like. This has nothing to do with giving my bf a chance to know my friend or not.
you're right on these too since your bf is not very much of a social person. So what are u gonna do? Will your guy fren understand if you already decided to be with your bf?
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Originally posted by Zarks:
you're right on these too since your bf is not very much of a social person. So what are u gonna do? Will your guy fren understand if you already decided to be with your bf?
I told my friend and he said he will respect my decision. It's my fault that I shouldn't make a promise to him so soon.
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Originally posted by Miss Tiny:
I told my friend and he said he will respect my decision. It's my fault that I shouldn't make a promise to him so soon.
No worries, like u said u guys are always out together, a good friend wont mind if u break your promise sometimes specially if its only outing and if you wanted to be with your bf. u guys can go out together some other time. I dont think its too soon anyway, u didnt know your bf suddenly free on Sat, dont blame yourself. Chill out of this misery and enjoy very much with your boy. Your action here already proved you still priotise ur bf. U already made the decision today instead of waiting for Friday nite. I somehow sense you're a good gf.Perhaps u can let your bf know that u cancel the outing to be with him. Hey, he should know this and you're not lying right? :)
I personally will feel touched if my gf said she cancel outing just to be with me. Well, who wouldnt.