My husband having affair with China woman!
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I think bcos u pragnant, he go find china gal mah, after u give birth, thing will come back to normal, men are like this, they just want sex, after china gal left him, he got no choice, sure come back to u.
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Originally posted by t_a_s:
I think bcos u pragnant, he go find china gal mah, after u give birth, thing will come back to normal, men are like this, they just want sex, after china gal left him, he got no choice, sure come back to u.
thats not a very comforting thought..
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Originally posted by Master -_-:
i am married
i have a daughter
im pregnant
i have cravings and backaches...
i contemplating divorce...
i have a lawyer whom i engaged to discuss legal issues
instead, i choose the forums as a platform to find solutions..
zzz
So, why are you here Master ?? zzz
What is Aunt Agony for ?
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That's what i thot too. Got upset when i saw some of the remarks. Its very sad and hurting... especially when i am in such a stage already... i am not trying to gain sympathy here. but just want someone to talk to and let it out, and to seek help and advise...
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Originally posted by Elim20:
That's what i thot too. Got upset when i saw some of the remarks. Its very sad and hurting... especially when i am in such a stage already... i am not trying to gain sympathy here. but just want someone to talk to and let it out, and to seek help and advise...
i dont know am i doing the right thing. On 1 hand, I want to let go, on the other hand, I thk of my kids. Am i selfish? I know some woman hang on the marriage for the sake of the kids. its so torturing...
china girls not easy to let go. they will cling on to the man. anyway, i think this girl won't let my hubby go so easily. since she thinks my hubby is loaded with $$$$$
Elim20,
We girls draw strength from each other in times of need. That's how we are.
Men on the other hand.. they go into their caves.
How old is your youngest child ?
Perhaps you need some alone time to sort out your thoughts.
A divorce is never a divorce when children are involved.
Is he still providing for the family ? Is he still doing his part as the father ?
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Originally posted by t_a_s:
I think bcos u pragnant, he go find china gal mah, after u give birth, thing will come back to normal, men are like this, they just want sex, after china gal left him, he got no choice, sure come back to u.
Yes after the China girl left him.. the wife will be infected with STD.
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Take it easy.. That's why most men can't have $$$, one got mor $$$ they start to fool ard. Don't think 2 much, ur bb also need a rest of mind.
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.....
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Originally posted by Elim20:
my girl is 5 this yr. he still provides for family, giving me allowance. but his heart is no longer with us.
he still wants to play around, he wants freedom. so what should i do? thot of giving him a chance, but he keeps lying to me. He off his hp at night when he goes out. having late nights, i dun noe how to carry on like that? how long is he going to play and have fun? while i am at home looking after the kids.
I think it is about time you let go of some burdens and let him step up as a father.
There's nothing wrong having fun outside .. but both of you must take turns.
When was the last time, you go out to do your stuff while he stays home to watch the kids ?
When was the last time, you and him go out on a date ?
Have you forgotten how it was like before you got married ?
Having children can be overwhelming, so you must learn to share your burden with your man.
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very sad
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Elim,
dont be sad. some men are like that. i know of a friend's hubby (they have 2 kids), still have affair with another pub gal (then have another kid). later he seems kanna some illnesses or what... seems like a heaven's punishment. but i still wish him recover from his illness for the sake of the kids.
that women shld put herself in your shoe mah.
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If you want to live the rest of your life without a spouse(most probably), go ahead and divorce.
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Can i ask how old r u and your hubby? And no, after the child is out he will not return.. Dun be surprise wat those PRC can do. Just let it go babe.
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Originally posted by Elim20:
After i gave birth to our 1st child, we hardly go out on a date. Firstly, is cos he was jobless that time. And I have been paying his debts all the while. So we dun really have the extra $ to go out and enjoy.
He just dun want to share the burden. Even when our girl was having high fever, he still goes out clubbing. I even have to tell him to go and see her. But he refused. Giving me excuses. Like very far, very tired! So you see, has he been a good father? I thot he will change for the better, but i think its getting worse now.
Sometimes i ask him to take care of her while i bath, but he only know how to make her cry. He likes to pull her ear and scold her for nothing. How can i ask him to take care?? I have to worry, if he will beat her or not. So i am always there to look after her.
Elim,
Was the decision to have another child agreed by the both of you ?
Since he has such bad rapport with the first one.. why did you decide to go ahead with the second one ?
Did you lay out ground rules before the second one is conceived ?
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Elim, think of ur happiness before making decision. Are you still able to trust him aft this round? If not, it doesn't make sense for ur kids to grow up in tat type of family environment.
Not sure how old r u, but don't think u v old la. Since u should be still young, ur journey of life still v v long. Think how r u going to live your life in future with ur kids.
Some wife v forgivable while others can't trust a person if tat person misuse their trust.
You should start working after delivery & lead a better life. When women got $$$, we won't scare getting bully by men.
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I dun noe how hard life is going to be, maybe I will just get another part time job. Can still survive without him.
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Originally posted by Elim20:
I am 32 this year. He is 2 years old then me.
Maybe at that moment, i was so scared of losing him. So i forgave him. And I thot of our kid. I can't be that selfish. I don't want my girl to grow up in a broken family. Furthermore, I have already tolerated him for so many years. I thot i can just forgive and forget.
Then for the period, he was very good. Coming back on time, bringing us out. So I thot he has make an effort to change. So when he told me to try for another one, i agreed. I also wanted our daughter to have another sibling.
But lately i found out he has been lying to me again. I was too soft-hearted to forgive him. He knows my weak points. Or maybe he thinks now with another bb, I wont leave him. So he wants the best of both worlds.
That's why thinking of abortion, but don't have the courage to do it. Since god gave it to me, I have to take good care of it. I know some couples have tried very hard for a baby. But they still dun have. I think it is fated...
Honestly, I don't have any trust in him now. At times when he tells me things, I don't know to believe or not. I don't know is he telling me the truth, or lying??
I dun noe how hard life is going to be, maybe I will just get another part time job. Can still survive without him.
Elim20,
Start planning for your own future.
If he doesn't want to change.. there is nothing you can do.
Yes, some people stay in the marriage, because they see no difference if they get a divorce.
They stay in the loveless marriage for the convenience. Since the mother has no intention of marrying another man, and the husband has a good reason not to commit into another lifetime agreement with a new woman. It's a win win deal.
I can tell you are a very devoted mother, and your children are the center of your life. So, channel your energy into raising your children.
If you don't love him anymore, and since he is still paying and keeping you and your children comfy, what have you got to lose ?
Don't let your anger get the betta of you.
If you let him go, he can happily go marry the other woman and that's what she wants isn't it ?
If you know how to play your cards right, the world can be yours to play with.
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Originally posted by Elim20:
i did thot of that. if i leave him, then he can be with that woman.
but if i dun leave him, then i will suffer, and the kids too. that's y i am in a dilemma.
How will you and your children suffer ? What difference will it make if you divorce him ?
The most is you don't see his LJ face anymore.
If you live your life and shut him outa your own life.. but live under the same roof , what's the difference ?
Letting him go emotionally .. and letting him go physically. What's the difference ?
He'll just be a room mate who is paying the bills. And best yet.. you don;t need to service him anymore.. let the other woman do the job.
If I am you, I'd just wait till he ask for the divorce himself.
At the mean time... I continue my life with my children while enjoying his new found $$$$.. my happiness is my own doing.
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haiz....... really dun noe what to do...
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Leave him = Painful and solve problem once and for all
Dun leave him = Dun solve problem once and for all and u will suffer.
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btw so long liao, have you found ur lawyer?
if no money u can go those woman society etc for help..
dun drag liao lah.. end this fast..
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Originally posted by Elim20:
haiz....... really dun noe what to do...
Since you are not sure what to do.. then don't do anything yet.
Don't make a hasty decision because you are angry with him for betraying you.
Remember, there's many ways to skin a cat.
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well... y in the first place ur husband want to cheat on u... did u ever do some reflecting on urself? etc. screaming at him, nv satisfii his ***** or care about the children more then u care about him
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er by the way, a pregant women is still able to have sex... a penis is not long enough to reach the womb "if is a normal 1 that is.."