Faithfulness in marriage
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Thank you all for your advice. Now for me to get my head cleared.......
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Originally posted by Upset gal:
Scenario :
Married guy to girl colleague - Miss you, shall we meet in some dark corner?
3. Can a 3rd party reading this take it to mean as a tease?
Maybe I'm uptight, but this isn't funny leh
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Originally posted by Upset gal:
What does it mean to be faithful? Is it just "not having done anything"? What is acceptable in society in this present world?
If I married guy tells a girl that he misses her and proposes to meet in some dark corner, is this acceptable? even if it is supposed to be a joke?
How old are you ah? Either you are very innocent or downright dumb! But I think you belong to the latter category.Married men said miss you??? You don't even have to ask stupid question here. You should have done the following already :-
1) Shout at him in the face in front of everyone and said 'Bu yau lian! Married still trying to chase other girls.
2) Telephone the wife and tell her the husband is in the seven year itch phase! Then sit back and watch the fun
3) At most you run far far away from him not come here ask stupid question like this UNLESS YOU also itchy 'hiao' because you interested in him too!
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Oops! Just realize you are not the intended 3rd party. Solly.
Anyway if your hubby said that to a girl then you should do the following :-
1) Confront him!
2) Don't take action outright. Collect all evidence then confront him
3) If all evidence confirmed he is getting fresh with other women, castrate him!
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very nonsense.
has the government succeeded in creating mindless zombies?
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Originally posted by Upset gal:
Scenario :
Married guy to girl colleague - Miss you, shall we meet in some dark corner?
Questions :
1. Is this considered unfaithful to married guy's partner?
2. What if married guy "has not done anything"?
3. Can a 3rd party reading this take it to mean as a tease?
1.No, his actions are not clear2.Then alright lor...
3.It seems a bit misleading.
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gal, åŠ æ²¹ ok? dun be sad =(
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Originally posted by Upset gal:
Scenario :
Married guy to girl colleague - Miss you, shall we meet in some dark corner?
Questions :
1. Is this considered unfaithful to married guy's partner?
2. What if married guy "has not done anything"?
3. Can a 3rd party reading this take it to mean as a tease?
Where does the fault starts? From reasoning
or behaviour? Can we safely say that one is guilty of 'sinning in love', even if infidelity does not manifest into behaviour?
I am not commenting the above idea along with the logic of 'One must see fire before one understands the destruction of a conflagration' - but rather, if a fire is sure to occur, there's little you can do to stop it.
In simple: you might be interested to know what's going on between your man and his colleague, but I think prior to that, it's equally important to understand where did the inflection first begin that led him astray potentially. Evolutionary Psychologist would have claim that monogamy is against the instinct of man and it's part of the Natural Selection to spread his seeds - but that's only if human are without cognition and a spiritual soul, as the latter is extremely crucial in our development in Love.
I think we all must come to an understanding that we cannot stop people from leaving or becoming unfaithful if that is what someone desired. Love and marriage is bounded by freewill - even transcendental beings are powerless to meddle against the freewill in Love. Therefore, if this very freewill is geared towards committing transgression, unless components of the source is evolved, if not the consequences are often dire.
Because I do not know your man, neither does your relationship - it's almost impossible to make accurate assessment as you ain't clear yourself. Knowing this, I say, take some ample time to understand your entire issue first. Avoid jumping into conclusion, thinking that your man is promiscuous. There might be suggestions, but there are many dimensions to unfaithfulness and some of these might not be intrinsically motivated (which means that a marriage is still potentially salvageable, for as long as certain components of the push factors is resolved).
P.S: Before I end my post, I just like to say: please do not dismiss divorce from your option totally. I am not encouraging you to consider this ultimatum, but rather, you still must allow yourself this option IF development of your situation becomes irrevocably putrid. Nobody should suffer abuse, neglect or helplessness over a vast period of time, without any viable mode to change their circumstances.
You don't have to use it, but you must be able to find it when you need it.
This is what I am advocating.
Cheers
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Woah there fellas, what's with the runaway train? I may sound a little naive in this world where apparently pessimism is equal to realism but are we not going a little far with no information? No context?
the literal words 'i miss you' are nothing... I miss my mates back home and some of them are girls, does that mean I miss them the same as I miss my fiancee and she should be worried? hell no, but i still miss them... not even remotely in the same league as how i miss my fiancee when she's away but the words are the same.
I get the feeling you might have added the dark corner bit... all the same Kris would probably know I was missing someone long before even i did... maybe if he's hiding it from you you have a right to be a bit upset but unless you have reason to be suspicious above that and he's always been good and faithful to you in the past it'd be foolish to assume anything just from that - especially as he knows you can get sensitive about that stuff. It is possible to be just friends with a member of the opposite sex... I really think talking about divorce from this with no more context or info is going just a little bit overboard guys... the more you push something the more it tends to become true... what happened to benefit of the doubt and innocent until proven guilty? surely they extend to someone you love and trust enough to marry in the first place? if it turns out his intentions are bad, sure, skin him alive, but don't declare war over a few pipes that could be used in nuclear weapons... we all know how it ends - everyone gets hurt and noone wins.
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my take on this,
i think married guy should know how to behave and not going around tease here tease there or joke here joke there
would u want to consider telling ur hubby that this kind of behaviour is just not accpetable and it make u upset
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Originally posted by Jezmeister:
Woah there fellas, what's with the runaway train? I may sound a little naive in this world where apparently pessimism is equal to realism but are we not going a little far with no information? No context?
the literal words 'i miss you' are nothing... I miss my mates back home and some of them are girls, does that mean I miss them the same as I miss my fiancee and she should be worried? hell no, but i still miss them... not even remotely in the same league as how i miss my fiancee when she's away but the words are the same.
I get the feeling you might have added the dark corner bit... all the same Kris would probably know I was missing someone long before even i did... maybe if he's hiding it from you you have a right to be a bit upset but unless you have reason to be suspicious above that and he's always been good and faithful to you in the past it'd be foolish to assume anything just from that - especially as he knows you can get sensitive about that stuff. It is possible to be just friends with a member of the opposite sex... I really think talking about divorce from this with no more context or info is going just a little bit overboard guys... the more you push something the more it tends to become true... what happened to benefit of the doubt and innocent until proven guilty? surely they extend to someone you love and trust enough to marry in the first place? if it turns out his intentions are bad, sure, skin him alive, but don't declare war over a few pipes that could be used in nuclear weapons... we all know how it ends - everyone gets hurt and noone wins.
Uh hmm.. uh hummmmm.
Wanna check out these links ?
Carrie Underwood's .....
http://youtube.com/watch?v=vSG4Cml7HXs
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Zok3tTtqkoI&feature=user
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A joke??? U must be joking?? what to do?? sometime we gals have to ask ourselves, aren't we killing our own gender by snatching and loving or playing with married men?? If that gal know that he is married, why she still go with him???
I mean we can blame it on men lustfullness and unfaithfulness, but i choose to blame we gals ourselves for going after or being together with a married man. Aren't we hurting our own sisterhood??
There are many virgin, young, handsome and single guys in sg, why go for married old uncles??? scratch my head???
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"I Miss You" these 3 words indeed might not b deemed as being flirtatious..But, "I Miss You..Shall we meet at some dark corner?" might mean something else oready.
After being caught with such evidence, who in tat circumstance wll admit "Yes, there is somethin goin on betwn us & yes, im flirting behind ur back." ?? Well, unless he wants a divorce.
1) Unfaithful in the straying of heart, perhaps. U decide urself.
*unfaithful*:
Adjective
1. Not adhering to promises, obligations, or allegiances; disloyal.
2. a. Not true or constant to one's sexual partner. b. Not true to one's spouse; guilty of adultery.
3. Not justly representing or reflecting the original; inaccurate.
2) Physically, he might "not hav done anything' - yet. But who knows?
3) It is up to individual to interprete. Women's instinct is the best.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
Uh hmm.. uh hummmmm.
Wanna check out these links ?
Carrie Underwood's .....
http://youtube.com/watch?v=vSG4Cml7HXs
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Zok3tTtqkoI&feature=user
I forgot... when one guy fucks up the every man in the world is to blame.
I haven't said he's not done anything wrong have I? I just think you guys are being just a little irresponsible yelling divorce on the little information we have.
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Originally posted by Jezmeister:
I forgot... when one guy fucks up the every man in the world is to blame.
I haven't said he's not done anything wrong have I? I just think you guys are being just a little irresponsible yelling divorce on the little information we have.
Listen to my hubby..my hubby is always right.
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To TS, Just get ready your SOP lar. 1) If you husband really have sex if another gal, what will you do? a) divorce ? b) kill him? c) forgive him if he is sorry? Sick and tired of hearing repeat stories of wives worried about their husband got another girl or not and in the end when the husband are caught in bed, the wives will still forgive them for straying. Why do you even have to think so much when you already decided to forgive him when he say sorry because of your daughter?
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What's wrong in ther?It's all in the attitude.