Originally posted by jojobeach:Communication barrier ? What barrier ?
Language barrier ? You unable to understand what she say and vice versa ?
Or
Are you talking about her refusal to talk about her past to you ?
Dude... take this advise .. STOP asking about her PAST.
no its like she just wont tell me wat shes really thinking and stuff.she said its like theres a wall in between me and her and i dont know how to explain that in words.and no i dun ask about her past
i kept asking her wat shes thinking but she just say nth nth.
Originally posted by angel7030:
oh like this hor, i think she still loves her ex lor, and the pain and hate of knowing he got another gf, you maybe in as a spare tire only.
yea sometimes i get the shitty feeling that im just a spare tire.
Originally posted by RachelSniper:Hmm... Since that is the case...
You got together for 2 months only from what you said.
For a budding relationship, It takes awhile to understand her, and she to you.
I think she is uncomfortable or unsure how to be candid with you. The good point about you is that you care for her. Although the easiest way is to overlook her shyness (or what-nots) or just pretend this issue would just go away by itself, you are caring/ mindful enough to seek help on how to maintain an open communication with her.
Tell her that you do care for her and being candid is one of the first ways to build up a mutual trust.
It indirectly breaks her out of the cocoon that she has hiding into all the times.
Certain things cannot be rushed when it concerns something which is as complex as a behaviour.
For now, you have to go slow on her. She already knows that you are willing to be a listener for her, so let her approaches you on her own free will.
Pry her out from her cozy cocoon once in awhile. She has to face up to reality sometimes soon.
Cheers.
i really do care about her but i find it hard to express myself.i have been frens with her since sec 1 and in her eyes i was just this bo chup/not caring guy.and its really hard to shake the image off
even if i told her i really care for her.she would just think its just words cus i dun really know how to express it.i hug her and say i love her everytime i see her but it doesnt help at all
Time time time.. you need to be patient.. 2 months is really nothing. Jus be there for her. She'll reciprocate. ;)
*Sigh
This takes alot of understanding and patience to see change in her behaviour. A common sentiment held by some of the readers here.
Do what you can after giving a serious thought over some of the readers' replies here.
I am sorry if I sounded like a wet blanket but perhaps you guys might not suit for each other if this becomes your constant worry.
Cheers.
sex her
Originally posted by IfUWantHateMe:no its like she just wont tell me wat shes really thinking and stuff.she said its like theres a wall in between me and her and i dont know how to explain that in words.and no i dun ask about her past
i kept asking her wat shes thinking but she just say nth nth.
You are very vague lah. How to advise you ?
When she says there's a communication wall... it can have different meanings depending on the circumstances you guys were in at that time.
So, it will really help if you can give some examples.
It could be that she finds you difficult to share because you don't listen well.
Or it could be your personality that is hindering the communication, like stubborness or criticism or the way you reply.......
or, she's just not that into you to begin with...
or she prefers to share her personal thoughts with close girlfriends...
So you see.. too many possibilities lah....
show her that u care. Start by telling everything about you or ur family etc then she will od the same as well (:
PATIENCE is the key