Whats fair?

• cantdecide

  29 Jul 08, 19:57

   

  Is it fair to go for others if you still have feelings for your ex?

   

  In my case, i still have feelings for this girl i chased and it has been almost 6 months since we broke it of.

  During this 6 months, i have been reluctant to find another girl.

  Recently i talked to one of my old friends and her advice was for me to find another girl to forget about the 1st one.

  So it got me thinking, wont it be unfair to whoever i'm finding/chasing if i still have feelings for the 1st girl?

  What's all you guys opinion out there and pardon me if you don't understand what i'm saying. Aint used to sharing. - J

   

• XxYaNxX

  29 Jul 08, 20:05

  One question, do you knw if you ex has feelings for you still ?

• cantdecide

  29 Jul 08, 20:11

  technically not my ex. we never officially stead so to say. but no, doubt she feels the same way as me.

• Jfund

  29 Jul 08, 20:13

  u sound like someone i know..

  logically,

  it isnt fair. but love isnt logical.

  so, if u choose to date this new girl, possibilities are,

  a) win-win situation:
  u may really fall in love with her and move on from ur ex.

  b) lose-lose situation:
  u treat her as a substitute and she finds out, gets hurt and breaks up with u.

  c) lose-win situation
  u treat her as a substitute but later fall in love with her and move on from ur ex.

  whatever it is, u must not let this new girl know that u still love ur ex!

  -QQ

• XxYaNxX

  29 Jul 08, 20:28

  Be honest with yourself and decide , not really fair to date another girl if you still have feelings for your "ex".

• 00king00

  29 Jul 08, 20:29

  be fair to yrself first

• cantdecide

  29 Jul 08, 20:30

  to jfund, it's not about the girl finding out. I can lie and hide things pretty well. It's the moral conflict i'm facing. not really fair to the second one.

  to XxYaNxX, i agree and that's what stopping me.

  thanks all both of your help - J

• XxYaNxX

  29 Jul 08, 20:56

  Give it a try with your ex  , if it don't work out you can look for another girl

• rainee

  29 Jul 08, 20:59

  Do not go with another girl if you have not forgotten your ex. It is not fair to yourself and also the girl.

  Maybe hang out with her as friends first?

• mamamamama

  29 Jul 08, 22:20

  Originally posted by cantdecide:

  to jfund, it's not about the girl finding out. I can lie and hide things pretty well. It's the moral conflict i'm facing. not really fair to the second one.

  to XxYaNxX, i agree and that's what stopping me.

  thanks all both of your help - J

  
  if you cannot bring yourself to forget your ex, then what's the point of courting other girls? it's not about whether you can lie and hide things until no one knows or not, being in a relationship isn't "compulsory". there are other ways to forget your ex other than to date girls you know.

• ispyyy

  29 Jul 08, 23:16

  Is it fair to go for others if you still have feelings for your ex?

  Omg... I m still too young to end my love life...

  If u think it is worthwhile to go for others, do it... Feelings for yr ex will exist 1... If u wait for yr feelings to dimminish b4 going for others, yeah, consider yrself to be love dead... People who do the above are people tat is over 50s liao...