is anything wrong wif me?
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i avoid places that my ex often go to..am i normal?
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ok de lah
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Its a show of avoidance. Nothing really wrong about it but it does show that you have not been able to get over that relationship completely.
Maybe in time you might be able to forget about her and be able to visit places that she might frequent.
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its normal
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i hate it when my friends talk about him and i act like i dont care when actually its really hurting me inside. i feel like i will never get over him.
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happen to meet my ex-bf in a food court in orchard with hubby beside me
just ignore ex & pretend i don't know him
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u need time.....
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To die to the past, one has to die to what one thinks one is. In other words, one has to die to one's own past image(s) of himself/herself.
Otherwise, the ghosts of the past(s) are bound to haunt - not existentially but psychologically - in the mind
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Originally posted by Fugazzi:
To die to the past, one has to die to what one thinks one is. In other words, one has to die to one's own past image(s) of himself/herself.
Otherwise, the ghosts of the past(s) are bound to haunt - not existentially but psychologically - in the mind
Chim,but how?
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There is no 'how', there is only knowing, understanding, accepting that one carries images in one's mind (which is not real) of many things, 'good' , 'bad', ... one can simply add on.
The experience of 'Nice'/'un-nice' does not matter.
If one is for eg, a teacher n after lessons leaves the classroom and (with understanding) no longer sees oneself as a teacher: one has no image of teacher, one does not accumulate image(s) and hence there is nothing to carry. One participates or plays the role in ..... and one experiences it and simply 'let's go'.
A story:
One day a monk n his young student were going into town. On their way, they approached a small river n saw a girl walking back and forth looking very disturbed.
The monk asked the girl - 'what is the problem'?
She told him that she feared crossing the river.
The monk responded: 'I will carry you across the river.'
So the monk carried the girl on his back n walked across the river stream. On reaching the opposite river bank, he put her down and bidding farewell went his way with his student tagging along.
Observing the whole thing, the young student was perturbed. He thought, 'the monk taught us to keep a distance from a women'.
After a few hours after they had left the girl n were already in town, the whole thing was still bothering the student in his mind. Finally, the student could not stand it any longer and brought it up to the monk.
Upon hearing this, the monk amusingly said: 'I had put down the girl when we crossed the river. You must be very tired carrying her around for the last few hours.'
Mind accumulates (images of ..) and the more, the bigger the burden. The lesser the images the more freer one feels. The ligther one feels the more one is moving towards the seat of one's being. One feels alive!
One flows existentially - i.e. one partakes of life as it comes, no 'hangovers'of the past, one is flowing with the river of life/living.
One's mind flows and it is in synchrony with one's heart (soul, spirit or ....whatever one calls it). One is free of the past - the images of eg, teacher, 'good', 'bad', .... is no longer there. One is integrated within oneself and no longer split within and most of all one is anew, 'alive' and partaking of life in all its hues
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Originally posted by Fugazzi:One is free of the past - the images of eg, teacher, 'good', 'bad', .... is no longer there. One is integrated within oneself and no longer split within and most of all one is anew, 'alive' and partaking of life in all its hues
beautifully written.