hello guys,
im feeling really lost now.
im turning 18 this november, currently NSF, early enlistment.
To cut my story short,
my girlfriend just broke up with me over another guy she knew for about a month or so.
our 20months relationship just ended like this, i find it hard to accept this reality.
when she brought up de topic of breaking up, i didnt know how to react to it.
because she has been a part of my life.
someone to message, someone who encourages you and cheering you up when ur feeling down,someone u spent ur time with for de past 20months is just leaving you over another guy.
i've been running away from reality for a week or so,taking att.c from clinics, hoping to calm myself down and giving myself a break having lost someone so important to you so suddenly.
i couldn't. i felt so pain deep inside my heart. literally aching heart. everything seems to be meaningless. although i understand that this relationship is not very long, its not short too. i know that many had overcome this problem but i just cant get over it.
many says that time will slowly wash away the scar. but im feeling more and more terrible as days go by. im really feeling empty.
times and times, when i smoke along the corridor, i would look down de building. i want to jump down, but i could not bear to leave so many things behind. i start to feel that people who committed suicide are brave people.
my parents arranged a psychiatrist for me. but i find it difficult to confide my problems to a stranger who claims that she is willing to help me.
may i know what should i do now?
Originally posted by xPromises:hello guys,
im feeling really lost now.
im turning 18 this november, currently NSF, early enlistment.
To cut my story short,
my girlfriend just broke up with me over another guy she knew for about a month or so.
our 20months relationship just ended like this, i find it hard to accept this reality.
when she brought up de topic of breaking up, i didnt know how to react to it.
because she has been a part of my life.
someone to message, someone who encourages you and cheering you up when ur feeling down,someone u spent ur time with for de past 20months is just leaving you over another guy.
i've been running away from reality for a week or so,taking att.c from clinics, hoping to calm myself down and giving myself a break having lost someone so important to you so suddenly.
i couldn't. i felt so pain deep inside my heart. literally aching heart. everything seems to be meaningless. although i understand that this relationship is not very long, its not short too. i know that many had overcome this problem but i just cant get over it.
many says that time will slowly wash away the scar. but im feeling more and more terrible as days go by. im really feeling empty.
times and times, when i smoke along the corridor, i would look down de building. i want to jump down, but i could not bear to leave so many things behind. i start to feel that people who committed suicide are brave people.
my parents arranged a psychiatrist for me. but i find it difficult to confide my problems to a stranger who claims that she is willing to help me.
may i know what should i do now?
treat this as a break from your girlfriend. if you really do love your gf, wait for the opportunity and win her back. either you succeed, or you will end up liking another girl along the way. ya, so relax, and enjoy the time with ur army buddy.
many couples eventually will patch up after they realise how much they miss their ex. so, be patient and wait for your chance.
er... only 20 mths leh dude
but ok la
u'll grow out of this.
it's her loss.
Originally posted by xPromises:hello guys,
im feeling really lost now.
im turning 18 this november, currently NSF, early enlistment.
To cut my story short,
my girlfriend just broke up with me over another guy she knew for about a month or so.
our 20months relationship just ended like this, i find it hard to accept this reality.
when she brought up de topic of breaking up, i didnt know how to react to it.
because she has been a part of my life.
someone to message, someone who encourages you and cheering you up when ur feeling down,someone u spent ur time with for de past 20months is just leaving you over another guy.
i've been running away from reality for a week or so,taking att.c from clinics, hoping to calm myself down and giving myself a break having lost someone so important to you so suddenly.
i couldn't. i felt so pain deep inside my heart. literally aching heart. everything seems to be meaningless. although i understand that this relationship is not very long, its not short too. i know that many had overcome this problem but i just cant get over it.
many says that time will slowly wash away the scar. but im feeling more and more terrible as days go by. im really feeling empty.
times and times, when i smoke along the corridor, i would look down de building. i want to jump down, but i could not bear to leave so many things behind. i start to feel that people who committed suicide are brave people.
my parents arranged a psychiatrist for me. but i find it difficult to confide my problems to a stranger who claims that she is willing to help me.
may i know what should i do now?
Just trust the psychiatrist and tell her your feelings. Everything discussed is confidential so people outside would not be able to obtain that information.
If you do not get all your feelings off your chest, it will be alot harder for you to feel better.
Originally posted by xPromises:hello guys,
im feeling really lost now.
im turning 18 this november, currently NSF, early enlistment.
To cut my story short,
my girlfriend just broke up with me over another guy she knew for about a month or so.
our 20months relationship just ended like this, i find it hard to accept this reality.
when she brought up de topic of breaking up, i didnt know how to react to it.
because she has been a part of my life.
someone to message, someone who encourages you and cheering you up when ur feeling down,someone u spent ur time with for de past 20months is just leaving you over another guy.
i've been running away from reality for a week or so,taking att.c from clinics, hoping to calm myself down and giving myself a break having lost someone so important to you so suddenly.
i couldn't. i felt so pain deep inside my heart. literally aching heart. everything seems to be meaningless. although i understand that this relationship is not very long, its not short too. i know that many had overcome this problem but i just cant get over it.
many says that time will slowly wash away the scar. but im feeling more and more terrible as days go by. im really feeling empty.
times and times, when i smoke along the corridor, i would look down de building. i want to jump down, but i could not bear to leave so many things behind. i start to feel that people who committed suicide are brave people.
my parents arranged a psychiatrist for me. but i find it difficult to confide my problems to a stranger who claims that she is willing to help me.
may i know what should i do now?
Please do not think about committing suicide, for you will only be trying to escape this way. As hard as it is to face up to reality at times, you will have no choice but to do it. If you were to truly die, the hearts of your parents and immediate family members, and those of your friends, will be broken.
Talk to the psychiatrist and see what words of advice she has to offer you. Although you may find it hard to confide your problems to her, you can be certain that she will find ways to make you open up and do so.
As for your girlfriend, don't think too much about her. Divert your attention to other stuffs such as gaming and such during your free time when you are not in camp. Even if she is to truly come back to you again, there is no telling when she will dump you for another guy again.
It's her loss that she broke up with you. it's not good to stick to a girl that's fickle-minded
by the way, knowing a person 20 months is better than knowing a person just a month though. so it's her loss for not knowing the guy well before breaking up with you.
simple.
u should get a hobby and friends.
find a new gf
people who committed suicide are not brave people. they are running away from their problems.
Find love in u first, cos it is apparent all these time she was propping u up. The centre that she gave u is no longer there#.
Yes, commit suicide but to the past IN u - both good/bad and u are free of baggage. Otherwise, it is going to weigh u down in many ways then u will ever know
As for the pscyhiatrist - she is going to make u a 'drug addict'. In both senses drugs-wise as well as psychologically.
#posting to ORIGAMIST would shed some light to your predicament
everything would be just fine.. commit sucide for a girl that dont treasure you is not worth it.. if a person treasure you, he or she would want you to live your life good..
try to stop thinking about the girl anymore.. she dump you for another guy and make you hurt so much already means she is heartless.. she doesnt deserve your love.. just forget her and get a new life without her.. she wont go back to you so no point focusing on her.. even if she does go back to you, reject her.. im sure you wont want to be hurt by that girl again.. she hurt you once, she most probably will do it again..
there is alot more things in life you can do and i'm sure you will find something you enjoy doing.. u can try knowing new girls too..
if you cant stand up on your feet too soon then give yourself some more time.. you really need some time to heal.. dont give up on your life.. i'm sure you can do it!
Good luck!
Originally posted by xPromises:hello guys,
im feeling really lost now.
im turning 18 this november, currently NSF, early enlistment.
To cut my story short,
my girlfriend just broke up with me over another guy she knew for about a month or so.
our 20months relationship just ended like this, i find it hard to accept this reality.
when she brought up de topic of breaking up, i didnt know how to react to it.
because she has been a part of my life.
someone to message, someone who encourages you and cheering you up when ur feeling down,someone u spent ur time with for de past 20months is just leaving you over another guy.
i've been running away from reality for a week or so,taking att.c from clinics, hoping to calm myself down and giving myself a break having lost someone so important to you so suddenly.
i couldn't. i felt so pain deep inside my heart. literally aching heart. everything seems to be meaningless. although i understand that this relationship is not very long, its not short too. i know that many had overcome this problem but i just cant get over it.
many says that time will slowly wash away the scar. but im feeling more and more terrible as days go by. im really feeling empty.
times and times, when i smoke along the corridor, i would look down de building. i want to jump down, but i could not bear to leave so many things behind. i start to feel that people who committed suicide are brave people.
my parents arranged a psychiatrist for me. but i find it difficult to confide my problems to a stranger who claims that she is willing to help me.
may i know what should i do now?
First of all TS, u shall stand up like a man. I know u will not went down so easily. Set back is part and parcel of life. If u think whenever u encounter set back and sucide is the only way. U are damm F*cking wrong. If it is so easy, encounter set back , everybody just kill themselves and 100% problem solve.
I can gurantee, death is 100% more worse than what u face if u decide to meet yr maker.
First of all, tell yr problem to PC. If he bo chap u, call SAF hotline. It is important to let them know yr problem.
TS, now try to recall any thing or event that serious straint on both of yr r/s. I never believe a r/s broke down is all due to one party fault. Did u do anything wrong? Maybe u are such a heavy smoker that she left u. Learn from past r/s failure to be a better partner and better man. If u did her something wrong that she left u. Treat it as letting her go. Do yrself good and herself too. If there is no major and she left u cos of her change of heart. So be it. Do u think she will shed a tears in yr funeral? She may even not bother to attend yr funeral and think its good that u left the world. Worth it for such lady??
U still have a future, a future wife/gf waiting for u. U still got a chance to have a good career and enjoying a good life, led a fulfilling purpose. And next time when u look back, u will feel proud of yrself that u never take the option of ending it.
i've been through to what you're going through now.
beside that, when i smoke along the corridor, i will look down de building. BUT i wont want to jump down
If TS is smart he will use this incident to try to chao keng mental problem in ns and maybe can downgrade pes status
TS,
'im really feeling empty' - this sums up your predicament.
If u feel that someone will take care of it, yes, someone might for a while - and the next thing is u are going to have anxiety attacks - cos it may be gone.
You can do many things to forget what u feel now - the price is repression, what is unacknowledged, undealt with will surface. Of course, u can still do things - with the understanding/knowing that u are trying to forget or ... then u might not repress or ignore what is within u.
Whatever it is u are or do the solution (answers) - is in you. Now u are drenched in 'darkness' and u are looking for light. Even coming here, is akin to that - sadly, it is merely a psychological booster.
However, when u understand that the light from your own understanding (self-understanding n acceptance of what u are) can free u - there is liberation , true liberation.
Darkness = lack of understanding of oneself - all aspects. here someone outside of u, a book, a friend ... add on, may gudie u, help u, advise u and when there is a change, that change is going to superficial and cosmetic.
This is going outward for ... .
Light = understanding, acceptance of oneself - transformative process cos it is done by oneself by going inwards!
PS: Change is renewal of a person, personality. Transformation is recognizing that behind a person, personality there is an individual, individuality.
sup sup shui... you will get over it after a year or two...
The pain is unbearable at first because of your deep love for her. She is a bitch, fancy dumping you for another guys show how "deep" her lover for you actually was in the beginning.. she might not even have loved you in the first place.
Take it easy dude, no point considering death or wat. Be a man, face the reality and chiong through your BMT. I broke up with my girl friend as well when i was in BMT. The pain is unbearable for me too, everyday can feel like crying, but just tell yourself to forget about her and move on.
With time, the pain will slowly subside. With new love, the pain will forever be gone.
a really big thank you for all of ur replies.
im no longer BMT alr. in unit already.
have thought of telling my problems to my pc but not trying to be racist or what, my pc is a malay.
friends around me say, ur pc malay forget it alr la.
im booking in later on already.
will try to forget things.
and solve things in a correct manner.
thanks alot guys.
all your replies are deeply appreciated.
might try to keep urself accompany? i mean, like going to shopping alone, reading books alone, working out alone?
i might not know much about how it feels for u since i have not been in a relationship b4... but i have been betrayed many times by friends.. betray as in.. backstab, sabo, friend become enemy all these.. alot la.. dunno how to explain...
what i did was nv trust any friends too much, which for u, it is up to u to decide... cuz if u are going not to trust any gf too much in future then it will be hard for ur future half..
then i go working out, running, doing work, do anything ALONE... and really i feel much better.. really better..
maybe i might sound a bit weak since i only kena betray by friends and feel down.. but i got some family problems too.. aiya.. lets say if i am weak... but what i did can really keep me happy... btw, try listening to music all the time.. its nice!
my point is, dont be afraid to be alone.. it is fun, it is very very very fun and exciting. and listening to music can temporarily make u happy.. it is nice tho.. haha good luck!
IA
what is so scary about being alone? i personally can stay at home without going out for 1 month. being alone is nothing to be afraid of. just do what u like to do. that could be playing games, watching series, reading up, sleep, eat. if you are really scared of loneliness, find your friends, ask them out. eat drink slp talk.
suicide will not solve the problem. for 15-16 years you lived your life without her, your parents brought u up nicely. after being with her for 20months, u concluded you cant live without her. so what exactly happened before you met her? were u in a coma all the while? or you were not alive at all? cannot be right?
your dependency on her is the mental barrier that is stopping you from living your life the way you should. get a grip, know that life is not all about her. if that is the case, everyone's life would revolve around her. but you see, everyone life revolves around themselves, and not on her, nor on their girlfriend boyfriend. she is not the reason for your existance, and will never be.
in life, bgr is not everything. divert your attention to family, and your life will be much better. do take care.
Do you know what you're doing? You're standing in one corner of the room, facing against the wall and telling yourself "There is no way out of this room!".
When time passes, you'll learn that all these time while you've been moaning and crying over your loss of girlfriend, you've been turning your back against the door. The exit to the room is right there. Door = Family & friends.
Your girlfriend may mean the world to you, but the world is not your girlfriend.
its not impossible to heal a broken heart
you need to be distracted.
i started going to the gym, sharpening my pool skills, a bit of part-time work, and hanging out with my friends everyday
the feelings will die, its a matter of time. so just hang in there
people lost their girlfriend of more then 5 years to someone they know less then 1 month.
it';s not the years or how long you with the lady that counts, it's how her feeling toward the another guy.maybe in the long run she find that u and her isn't gonna make it far or u can give what she wanted. oir the new guy is god damn rich.
try to move on, u r just 18 years old, yet an adult, you'll find more suitable girl in the future. that's why try to treasure the moment with your girl when you still can, when she's gone, u can only be sad alone.
relation is like that, u will go stronger next time, after a few more try. maybe next time is your turn to dump another lady.
a word for you : U GOT DUMPED.