The HaoPor culture
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Hello,
I know there are a lot of people under 15 in the forums but I am going to lament about the haopor culture and tell everyone to beware of fake women. While I say that not all women are bad (I am very sure there are good women out there - but I yet to find) but we have to watchout for women who are not genuine.
I notice lately that it has been a habit for women to openly flirt at single men like a public exhibitionist. I am a postgraduate student at NUS. I am in late 20s and I will not disclose what course I am doing. I have a couple of this lady in my project that behaves like a flirt. She tries to pair up with this other guy (who is married) and they try to squeeze me out from the project and provoke me to get my attention on her. Whenever I ignore her calls or her text, she would get my group project mates to try to boycott me by snubbing me for lunches and very rudely speak to me. I just neutralize them by singing and acting cheerfully. To me, next time when I go out there at least I give this type of slut the clear message that I am not interested in this kind of woman. Some more she tries to lure me into open to force me to go after her in front of the whole class. But I don't like this type of woman, so I resist. She try to ask my friends about my past and dig all my so-called embarassing incidents in the past, blair out to the class for me to hear so that she can annoy me. I just act cheerfully and dance around to show her how cheerful I am. So she show her angry face at me and get some classmates to be hostile at me. Some of this haopor very want face one. But there is such thing as karma, god will punish them someday.
Boys and girls, real relationships start off with frienship, trust, genuine and respect for one another. Of course the chemistry is important but respect for one's privacy is even more important. Please avoid this kind of woman. We should find genuine relationships that is going towards marriage. Not this type of rubbish haopors. To me they can do anything they want to me, I just act indifferent. Because I want to show that haopor that she is not important to me. But mark my words, she will be there to cause more trouble, but for me, my objective is to repel her so next time whenever I go, I can at least wear the badge of honour to say that I have repelled her and I can show everyone that I am an honest person who is interested in genuine women not this type of rude, manipulative and fraud women. Again i say not all woman is bad, we just got to be careful that there are woman out there who is only interested in their market value testing. Some people here may say that just date her one night and have one night stand. I very disagree with this because first of all, I am honest person and I don't do this type of things. Second, this type of haopor is very good at talking bad things about you. So if you attempt to do anythjing like that, it would only spell worse things for you. Besides, she have everything so well guarded and her intention is only to fatt hao at you, so don't expect her to give in more. Not that I want anything of those from her - yuck ! I am only interested in woman who are honest, genuine, respect me as a person and my privacy. Not the public exhibitionist the haopor is, thsoe that use third party to attack you.
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Eh.U very the innocent leh. Wait till u see the world out there then u 'beng San'.
There may be something wrong on how she do things.Real relationship of any kind starts with communication.I doesnt mean only boy girl relationship.It can be Friends or Buddy.
There is so many things u can do when she start all the nonsense.Yet u act indifferently.This only shows ur immature.Not only do u not understand women,u also cant get well with ur friends.
No normal guy would come online and complain about"some girl likes me but i dislike her"
You freaking got some ego sia!
All the women in the world like that one! Go planet mars to find ur dream girl bah!
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Originally posted by Worcer:
Eh.U very the innocent leh. Wait till u see the world out there then u 'beng San'.
There may be something wrong on how she do things.Real relationship of any kind starts with communication.I doesnt mean only boy girl relationship.It can be Friends or Buddy.
There is so many things u can do when she start all the nonsense.Yet u act indifferently.This only shows ur immature.Not only do u not understand women,u also cant get well with ur friends.
No normal guy would come online and complain about"some girl likes me but i dislike her"
You freaking got some ego sia!
All the women in the world like that one! Go planet mars to find ur dream girl bah!
Goodlah, planet mars it is lah. I would rather not get married than to be with the likes of one like that.
Eh, I am not innocent. I see all my friends ah, all of them go find their wife and gf, where got have to go out in the public and show everyone their affection towards the girl one leh? This kind of lady only got one intention, to test her market value and then after that reject you in front of everyone else. She then later would add another 2-3 haopors to disturb you. I saw her tactic leh, she did that to one of my senior classmates. She think i very stupid not to realise her tricks.
I think you are the innocent one lah. Nothing to do with ego. If she want to play game game, at least do it privately between boy and girl lah. Not do it in the public for everyone to see, and then get a third party guy to try to attack you as part of the game. For obvious reasons, she was trying to play me a fool.
Mah hai, who is the one immature? Of course her lah. I have another project group you know, then she go and talk bad about me, scare off the other ladies from my other project group. That group almost collapse if it weren't for me to made some last minute plea to those idiots to come back. So malicious one this lady. And then she go and ally with Mr Chennai idiot to go and sabotage my other project to get my attention. What kind of lady is this? I am paying thousands of SGD for this course and I want to learn something out of it. But does courtship has to go all the way until it diminishes my studies? I just got to see her bad character and realise what a fake she is.
I watch all my other friends, during courtship, you never see them out in the open, their wife or gf, during courtship never go and tell everyone about what the guy did. Not like her, man. That day, I send an email to this lady informing her that I could not attend a project discussion because I had to send my grandma who is suffering from psychotic problems to the psychiatrist. I inform her not to tell everyone. Next day, I came to class, all the classmates made fun of me and say somebody grandma crazy one. Wah, this kind of lady so deceptive one. Cannot even be trusted one. I wonder who is the one with the ego?
Also, this is not the only forum about girl likes guy but guy desperately want to get rid of her. There is also another one.
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There is anotehr one about girl likes guy but guy don't like girl.
"How to just be friends" by Shadez
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I didn't know NUS students are unable type english properly O_o
Are you sure you are in your 20s? You sound much younger than that...by the way...if you try to pretend nothing is wrong by singing or dancing...people are gonna think you're weird and you will become even more infamous
They will think you're bonkers!
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she like you, maybe?
you sweet lah. need more guys like you loh
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
I didn't know NUS students are unable type english properly O_o
Are you sure you are in you 20s? You sound much younger than that...by the way...if you try to pretend nothing is wrong by singing or dancing...people are gonna think you're weird and you will become even more infamous
They will think you're bonkers!
Wow, thank you, you make me feel so young. I am 28. I take that as a complement.Maybe I purposely type my english like this because i scared my classmates would recognise my writing.
Why not? I don't bother what people think of me, I have high self esteem, I don't think of myself as bonkers. That lady and her co-conspirators intention is to provoke me and make me angry. By dancing and smiling, I am bringing out the clear message to her and her gang that I am clearly not feeling miserable over an insignificant insect such as her.
Of course i wasn't literally dancing. I was merely imitating a dancing act like being playful. Of course anyone see me doing this would know that I am play acting to show my cheerfulness especially those people trying to attack me.
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Originally posted by mistyblue:
she like you, maybe?
you sweet lah. need more guys like you loh
I am not sweet. I am a Pit Bull. I bite.
Hah, she is trying to manipulate me. I am not fooled by her fake flirts. If she really like me, she wouldn't try to dig out my past and tell the whole class, use a despicable classmate to sabotage my assignment, scare away my project members from doing project with me, use her friends to mock me and make fun of me, attack my privacy, try to publicly lure me to go after her in public full sight of the classmates and not allow me to feedback to the group project. She just want to lure me in the open to test her market value. What is even worse, she get her other friend Ms J to flirt at me too, to test my resolve.And so what if she does like me? I mean hypothetically. She has shown me a very bad manipulative side of her. I would not want to associate with this kind of woman.
I tell you lah, my advice for every man, go find a genuine woman in your life. Don't waste your time with haopors like this. They are only in it to play a sex voyeur game at you but without the sex. Yes, it is like watching a porn movie without the sex scenes. Of course, I am not saying I want to get sex. I want an honest relationship not fake craps like this. She thinks she is so high value tht I have to crawl under her despicable friends who tore my project feedbacks into half, I spend until 3 am finishing those feedbacks. That is just so outrageous. Some of these haopors think they so high value that they can do anything to walk over you. I am just showing her back that I don't need a manipulative bugger like her and I will continue to repel her off.
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Originally posted by Behemoth tan:
Wow, thank you, you make me feel so young. I am 28. I take that as a complement.
It wasn't a compliment...Sigh...looks like my sarcasm is phail
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
I didn't know NUS students are unable type english properly O_o
Are you sure you are in you 20s? You sound much younger than that...by the way...if you try to pretend nothing is wrong by singing or dancing...people are gonna think you're weird and you will become even more infamous
They will think you're bonkers!
alamak..i almost post exactly what u said lol..heng ah...hanor hanor..TS and his classmates like those just go in poly freshmen kind of peepos leh..
Ur sarcasm dint fail la..mehbe TS is too smart to understand cuz he NUS mah...
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Originally posted by _Da_Dood_:
alamak..i almost post exactly what u said lol..heng ah...hanor hanor..TS and his classmates like those just go in poly freshmen kind of peepos leh..
Ur sarcasm dint fail la..mehbe TS is too smart to understand cuz he NUS mah...
Great minds think alike?? Or are all loonies the same? :P
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
Great minds think alike?? Or are all loonies the same? :P
while great minds think alike, fools seldom differ...actually, for a "post-grad" he seems unable to write coherently
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Hmmm...actually...based on what my sis told me (she's in NUS)...quite a number of the students there cannot spell or even write in good english...dunno y lei...
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
It wasn't a compliment...Sigh...looks like my sarcasm is phail
Cannot sarcastic back one ah? -
Originally posted by Behemoth tan:
Cannot sarcastic back one ah?Wow you understood!
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
Wow you understood!
So? So what? What is the big deal?
Wah, seem to me you suddenly become so offended and take so personal - so focus on NUS and my english, hmm, you must be one of those haopors in school. Sorry, didn't mean to offend you but i was talking about my situation.
I would like to get back the issue about haopors.
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
Great minds think alike?? Or are all loonies the same? :P
Don't so siau siau here. Let the man speak. You are changing the subject. I am interested to hear more about what he has to say. He says wise words. You on the otehr hand only know how to insult people. You must have a lot of free time. You probably got your own problems that relate similarly to his and for this reason you got angry because you were probably in the same situation. -
Originally posted by Behemoth tan:
So? So what? What is the big deal?
Wah, seem to me you suddenly become so offended and take so personal - so focus on NUS and my english, hmm, you must be one of those haopors in school. Sorry, didn't mean to offend you but i was talking about my situation.
I would like to get back the issue about haopors.
I'm not offended :)
To atone for my sins I shall throw a pity party for you
*throws confetti*
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
I'm not offended :)
To atone for my sins I shall throw a pity party for you
*throws confetti*
Really? Oh, I am so touched. Unfortunately I don't need your pity. But I think you do need a lot of pity from me. I pity you because you must have a lot of personal problems that you come into here to offer as much sarcastic remarks as you can to other contributors here, so that you can feel better and drown in your own sorrows.Here is my pity party for you. Surprise ! Ok done.
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Originally posted by Durian_bananas:
Don't so siau siau here. Let the man speak. You are changing the subject. I am interested to hear more about what he has to say. He says wise words. You on the otehr hand only know how to insult people. You must have a lot of free time. You probably got your own problems that relate similarly to his and for this reason you got angry because you were probably in the same situation.Laugh! Good!
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Originally posted by Behemoth tan:
Really? Oh, I am so touched. Unfortunately I don't need your pity. But I think you do need a lot of pity from me. I pity you because you must have a lot of personal problems that you come into here to offer as much sarcastic remarks as you can to other contributors here, so that you can feel better and drown in your own sorrows.Here is my pity party for you. Surprise ! Ok done.
Read http://www.sgforums.com/forums/10/topics/393398?page=2#posts-9674649 -
Points to note:
- On the surface, you're trying to warn us about such people. But in actuality, you're sore that one of your classmates just screwed your grades up and you're looking for people who agree with your views about her. That alone makes me doubt your claim that you have high self-esteem.
- You said that your classmates made fun about your grandma's condition. Two possibilities: 1. your classmates are a bunch of 9 year-old kids, or 2. you have been ticking everyone in the class off. I believe that the former wouldn't be true with them being NUS students, though you may believe otherwise.
- "...singing and acting cheerfully" is not acting indifferently, but rather subserviently and hypocritically. If you are indifferent to her actions, you shut up and ignore her, but you did not do so simply because you were afraid of being perceived negatively by others. That shows that you're low in self-esteem and you have little, if any, friends in your class, which is why you're seeking affirmation from a bunch of strangers online.
Suggestions:- If you don't like her pestering you (I'm assuming you're not being oversensitive), tell her to get off your back in front of everyone. That should get the message across.
- If you've been pissing everyone off, be nice to them, and stop being a hypocrite.
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Originally posted by Dondontan:
Read http://www.sgforums.com/forums/10/topics/393398?page=2#posts-9674649*must resist urge... to diss... people....*
Damn!! They are making it so easy!
Ok guys let's come to a compromise...you stop saying stupid stuff and I'll keep my mouth shut
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
*must resist urge... to diss... people....*
Damn!! They are making it so easy!
Ok guys let's come to a compromise...you stop saying stupid stuff and I'll keep my mouth shut
Halo ah? Miss Bonkers. If you cannot start an intelligent conversation or debate then please shut your mouth as you say. If you don't agree then say so. Start a debate or agree or disagree, that is what forum is about. If you want to go around and poke insults then you are not contributing here. And if you are here talking about NUS, people english, throwing pity party then i really think you got mental problems. Sorry lah, it is as if people are talking about pertinent issues and you are talking about dogs and cats. Grow up and stop acting immature. -
Originally posted by Behemoth tan:
Hello,
I know there are a lot of people under 15 in the forums but I am going to lament about the haopor culture and tell everyone to beware of fake women. While I say that not all women are bad (I am very sure there are good women out there - but I yet to find) but we have to watchout for women who are not genuine.
I notice lately that it has been a habit for women to openly flirt at single men like a public exhibitionist. I am a postgraduate student at NUS. I am in late 20s and I will not disclose what course I am doing. I have a couple of this lady in my project that behaves like a flirt. She tries to pair up with this other guy (who is married) and they try to squeeze me out from the project and provoke me to get my attention on her. Whenever I ignore her calls or her text, she would get my group project mates to try to boycott me by snubbing me for lunches and very rudely speak to me. I just neutralize them by singing and acting cheerfully. To me, next time when I go out there at least I give this type of slut the clear message that I am not interested in this kind of woman. Some more she tries to lure me into open to force me to go after her in front of the whole class. But I don't like this type of woman, so I resist. She try to ask my friends about my past and dig all my so-called embarassing incidents in the past, blair out to the class for me to hear so that she can annoy me. I just act cheerfully and dance around to show her how cheerful I am. So she show her angry face at me and get some classmates to be hostile at me. Some of this haopor very want face one. But there is such thing as karma, god will punish them someday.
Boys and girls, real relationships start off with frienship, trust, genuine and respect for one another. Of course the chemistry is important but respect for one's privacy is even more important. Please avoid this kind of woman. We should find genuine relationships that is going towards marriage. Not this type of rubbish haopors. To me they can do anything they want to me, I just act indifferent. Because I want to show that haopor that she is not important to me. But mark my words, she will be there to cause more trouble, but for me, my objective is to repel her so next time whenever I go, I can at least wear the badge of honour to say that I have repelled her and I can show everyone that I am an honest person who is interested in genuine women not this type of rude, manipulative and fraud women. Again i say not all woman is bad, we just got to be careful that there are woman out there who is only interested in their market value testing. Some people here may say that just date her one night and have one night stand. I very disagree with this because first of all, I am honest person and I don't do this type of things. Second, this type of haopor is very good at talking bad things about you. So if you attempt to do anythjing like that, it would only spell worse things for you. Besides, she have everything so well guarded and her intention is only to fatt hao at you, so don't expect her to give in more. Not that I want anything of those from her - yuck ! I am only interested in woman who are honest, genuine, respect me as a person and my privacy. Not the public exhibitionist the haopor is, thsoe that use third party to attack you.
Hi, sorry to hear that you are facing this problem. I am married with two kids. Yes you are right, I met my wife when I signed up on a tour group to the United States. I first saw her stood there at Grand Canyon - it was love on first sight. I made the first move to approach her and we clicked immediately. After the tour, I got hold of her contact number and when we went back, I called her up for movies and lunches. It was in effect, free dating. We build our relationship from here. Then came the time when I brought her to see my family and vice versa. She also took me to see her family. We dated for 2 years until I managed to muster the courage to ask her hand in marriage. We've since married for 8 years and we have two girls.
I totally agree with you Mr Tan, the lady seemingly does not reflect what you call "genuineness". I do not think the girl is interested in you, she is just there to fool around with you. Best you ignore her and concentrate on your studies. By the way, what prompted her to behave this way towards you? Did you do something?