going out with me is like having therapy?
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Originally posted by themoment86:
Friend told me and gf that for him to go out with me is like having therapy because i am won't kao pei at him because of certain things..oh great..what is he trying to imply? he felt sick with his gf or family then need my help to relax then call me out?zzz...
felt really weird upon hearing it... >.<
Your friend is just being honest about what he felt when he's out with you.It could be worse than what you have imagined and it could also be just because he was showing his gratitude by saying out what he felt compelled to tell you.
Regardless, what you have decided to behave towards him next will determine if your journey with him has ended already or not yet.
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sometimes i feel he very ke lian...cause his gf literally control him like mad de..heard he say they would argue very often..so as his friend i told him that since she is so manipulative and giving u no freedom (coz she is very possessive) why not either talk to her about her problem or else just leave her? i believe the latter will make her realize what kind of person she is...must let her have a taste of losing someone..i think she doesn't know how to to cherish it..but well..my friend has been with her for er..7years i think...to a certain extend even without love, its difficult to leave her also la..cause its more or less a routine...but..i see him like that i really pity him..hope he can teach her a gd lesson on managing a healthy relationship...i hate it when she controls him n tell what to do n not do la..! i ask him if that was what he wants..he say he is neutral..i ask him if she is a control freak..he say yes..tell him to do something about it..he say he dun wan to argue n quarrel with her...kaox! infront of his friend..he act super macho...infront of his gf..really like a mouse...i dun even know if that was respect or simply fear! ahyo..really ah..hopeless..his gf not very chio, not rich..character as what his family and i observe..simply sucks..
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Originally posted by themoment86:
sometimes i feel he very ke lian…cause his gf literally control him like mad de..heard he say they would argue very often..so as his friend i told him that since she is so manipulative and giving u no freedom (coz she is very possessive) why not either talk to her about her problem or else just leave her? i believe the latter will make her realize what kind of person she is…must let her have a taste of losing someone..i think she doesn’t know how to to cherish it..but well..my friend has been with her for er..7years i think…to a certain extend even without love, its difficult to leave her also la..cause its more or less a routine…but..i see him like that i really pity him..hope he can teach her a gd lesson on managing a healthy relationship…i hate it when she controls him n tell what to do n not do la..! i ask him if that was what he wants..he say he is neutral..i ask him if she is a control freak..he say yes..tell him to do something about it..he say he dun wan to argue n quarrel with her…kaox! infront of his friend..he act super macho…infront of his gf..really like a mouse…i dun even know if that was respect or simply fear! ahyo..really ah..hopeless..his gf not very chio, not rich..character as what his family and i observe..simply sucks..
Alot of guys often end up with girls who bears certain resemblance to their mothers.So in this case, I won't be surprised if this is really what your friend wanted.
Bottomline, don't go and wreck up other people's relationship under the shadow of real friendship. Real friendship do not deter with each other's own free will but can still managed to be there for each other in times of misfortune and fortune.
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Originally posted by themoment86:
the real motive!!! is cause wan to watch a movie lo... zzz...and whether he falls for me anot is not my prob..i dun seduce ppl de okay! i am just me no matter who am i out with..but i really really really dun understand why people can say things like "you CANT go out with you ex AT ALL" not even once! it's really ridiculous...if one day i am gonna say that to my guy i would be soooo ashame of myself...cause i will see myself as petty woman..oh..yea yea..like i said earlier on...as long its not too freq like 1 week 3times..i dun see what's the problem...haix..1week or 2week once is totally fine with me..sup man! need to control ur partner so much meh?if its urs..meet ex everyday also nvm ma...but if its not..even if going with someone whom u meet once a year or 10years once also can ruin a relationship...ok..i abit exaggerated..haha..but thats me..and always been..that henpecked friend of mine..can go suicide..
There since your real motive is to catch a movie at times and all, i find that it is quite unfair for you to meddle too much with him and he's personal relationship life. Given the fact you're he's ex-gf. Put yourself in her shoes, what if you're hearing things from ur bf abt he's ex suggesting him to break off, due to ur behaviour? I guess you'd ripe off her throat and shut her forever.
Sometimes yes, u may think if things are meant to be, they meant to be... however there are no free lunch in this world, so it's nth wrong for people to work for what they really want. like in this case the gf, tries to protect what is her's... and adding on to that if you believe in ur what's meant to be will be logic, than let me ask you why are you still discouraging ur ex from the rls? Since what's meant to be will be, u shldn't care and leave it like it is right?
I kinda think that the gf is not overly - possessive but simply lack trust to the bf. Can't really blame her unless we really know why can we? Being a guy, i know of many temptations I've to resist everytime i go out with my buddy, cigg is 1 thing I quit but they still smokes, girls 2nd thing, all the girls u used to flirt with becomes your buddy where you cant and wun have intentions upon, but what about new girls in the group? On the norm, guys of all age look at girls, pretty ones especially, some guys not only LOOK but they virtually rape the 'victim' with their stare.
n TS you commented on he's gf looks and all, in a way i felt u're quite confident abt yourself. Probably this arouses jealousy within the gf, knowing her own bf is going out with a seemingly perfect ex will only push her to desperation have u ever tot of tat?
I felt that my way of typing may be hostile but please take note it's nothing near there, i'm just expressing myself and to let u understand my opinion which u can always disagree =)
I like ur way of thinking, i am not as magnanimous as you are, i am someone that fight for my own happiness, i allow my gf to go with her friends but i must know with who and where to, but there are times i won't. Just like in my case, she won't mind me see-ing my friends, but at times she'd make noise...
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Originally posted by themoment86:
i dun think i have a prob..anything wrong with going out with ex?some ex makes good friend..think singsporean too petty..i personally do no have prob with that as long its not too freq..
Going out with ex 1-on-1 is not a matter of being not petty. Look at it this way:
If u are the one who dumped him, why would you wanna go with someone you don't wanna be with ? Don't you have other friends ?
If you are the one who got dumped, why would you wanna go with someone who doesn't want you ? Are you his 'spare tire' ? It may seem petty, but at least you don't get hurt :)
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sigh..if u guys has seen his gf..trust me..u would wish that they break off..he literally got no friend becoz they would siam him bcoz of his gf..terrible..coz his gf make noise at slightest thing and rant forever..eveb i am afraid of going near him..ask him out is just to keep contact..ahyo...never in my life i met any woman like her..to think that she is quite old le..and even if i m fcking ugly his gf will make noise also..lol..which is y i say she is mad...ops
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maybe their Chinese-8-characters suit each other pretty much lor...
this is heaven's will...
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Originally posted by themoment86:
sigh..if u guys has seen his gf..trust me..u would wish that they break off..he literally got no friend becoz they would siam him bcoz of his gf..terrible..coz his gf make noise at slightest thing and rant forever..eveb i am afraid of going near him..ask him out is just to keep contact..ahyo…never in my life i met any woman like her..to think that she is quite old le..and even if i m fcking ugly his gf will make noise also..lol..which is y i say she is mad…ops
As a FRIEND you should respect his choice of gfs.
Maybe he's the type who likes getting bossed around or whatever. Anyway why are you even commenting on this? Not that it's affecting you right?
All I can say is, stay out of other people's business. There is a reason why he chose her as his gf. And it's not your place to comment on his choice.
You can give suggestions, but from what I see, you seem like you're egging him on to ditch her.
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For the sake of his happiness..i suggest he dump her..but well of he prefers to be bossed around then be it la..haha..i think the primary reason is becoz he is lacking motherly love..so he prefers to date and like ppl who are er..in the 40s..
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he just trying to thank u.....
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he asked me out again, and said the same whole thing about enjoying our time, told me to cherish the time we have in a kinda sad way...stares at me in the eyes and i tot he wanna rape me in the bus..LOLX, then when i left his place i asked myself, if..IF he really likes me..i will wanna be with him meh?we really have alot of commons..too many..but talk about going into relationship with him...hmm...
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Originally posted by themoment86:
he asked me out again, and said the same whole thing about enjoying our time, told me to cherish the time we have in a kinda sad way...stares at me in the eyes and i tot he wanna rape me in the bus..LOLX, then when i left his place i asked myself, if..IF he really likes me..i will wanna be with him meh?we really have alot of commons..too many..but talk about going into relationship with him...hmm...
Yes, Singaporean guys are quite lame in their attitude, behaviour and hidden agenda.Don't you have a better choice somewhere?
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Originally posted by parn:
Yes, Singaporean guys are quite lame in their attitude, behaviour and hidden agenda.Don't you have a better choice somewhere?
hm...not at the moment...waiting the right guy to find me at the right time =)
he's a nice guy...perhaps someone with higher eq knows what's he thinking..but not me haha =D