broke up with gf
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deleted
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like wad i told u on msn,
u really think too much liao.
while looking at the future is a good thing,
the more impt thing is the present.
u like to b around her
she likes to b around u.
thats really all u need now.
problems that u think will arise in the future?
worry about them when they are coming,
and surely by then
ur rs with her will be strong enough to withstand all the tests one.
but hais, too late alr.
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If you've commitment issues then you're probably doing the right thing.
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Just don't expect her to get back with you after you've sorted out your "issues".
You'll probably hurt her more anywayz.
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ha
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nabei, now lost 2 friends
and a good gf la
its like theres nothing wrong with her la
just feel that shes like 19, so young?
i just feel that i shouldnt pak tor to restrict her, know wat i mean?
its like she still have so many things to see, so many things to know
i dunwan her to be tainted by my ideals too, like shaping her to my liking?
thats like forcing her indirectly man, i hate it
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the reason for breaking up ?
becos you want a relationship but w/o commitments type ?
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Originally posted by youyayu:
ha
nah im cool, im immuned to ur childish attacks anyway
u cant really hurt me now
try harder, okay?
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Originally posted by gigabyte14:deleted
u didnt lose 2 frens over this thing.
only 1.
the other 1 is shit.
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Originally posted by Just_do_it_lah:
the reason for breaking up ?
becos you want a relationship but w/o commitments type ?
no u dumbass
i tot having a r/s will complete me
but then i realised its not
and she is the perfect girl, but the wrong timing, know what i mean?
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Originally posted by ChoCoChips:
u didnt lose 2 frens over this thing.
only 1.
the other 1 is shit.
haha
its like the kinda awkward stuff between them is all because of me
really wrong timing la
lol u imagine if i dunno her
maybe she'll with jer/youyayu/whatever 5566 shows the characters u can think of
whenever i broke the bros before hos code, nothing good really came out of it
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Originally posted by gigabyte14:
nabei, now lost 2 friends
and a good gf la
its like theres nothing wrong with her la
just feel that shes like 19, so young?
i just feel that i shouldnt pak tor to restrict her, know wat i mean?
its like she still have so many things to see, so many things to know
i dunwan her to be tainted by my ideals too, like shaping her to my liking?
thats like forcing her indirectly man, i hate it
Ask yourself, are you regretting your decision now?
If yes, then you should not be breaking up in the first place.
I understand she is young and you don't want to restrict her etc, but what matters most is whether does she feel restricted by you?
If yes, talk about it, there is always a solution and a break-up sometimes may not be necessary.
If no, continue to love her more...
All the best dude.
I am just speaking from personal experience, I was in a similar situation not too long ago.
Cheers
Simple Bear
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Originally posted by Simple_Bear:
Ask yourself, are you regretting your decision now?
If yes, then you should not be breaking up in the first place.
I understand she is young and you don't want to restrict her etc, but what matters most is whether does she feel restricted by you?
If yes, talk about it, there is always a solution and a break-up sometimes may not be necessary.
If no, continue to love her more...
All the best dude.
I am just speaking from personal experience, I was in a similar situation not too long ago.
Cheers
Simple Bear
but hey, i made my decision, i cant turn back now, even if i turn back now, it'll be all different too
she doesnt feel restricted by me i guess, but when i wanna change her abit, she'll be like rejecting
and vice versa
its like both are suffering bit by bit, so why, so why carry on?
she deserve better
and hey, of course i still harbour feelings for her too
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Originally posted by gigabyte14:
but hey, i made my decision, i cant turn back now, even if i turn back now, it'll be all different too
she doesnt feel restricted by me i guess, but when i wanna change her abit, she'll be like rejecting
and vice versa
its like both are suffering bit by bit, so why, so why carry on?
she deserve better
and hey, of course i still harbour feelings for her too
Hey giga,
since you have made your decision, move on.
Just take it as a learning experience.
Change is never good if it doesn't come from within.
Take care dude...
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Originally posted by gigabyte14:
no u dumbass
i tot having a r/s will complete me
but then i realised its not
and she is the perfect girl, but the wrong timing, know what i mean?
haha.. okie. -
Simply_the_best_bear is right... move on...
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Cheer up soon.
Hope things turn better for u.
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no matter what... guy shouldn't make gals cry...
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Originally posted by I-like-flings(m):
no matter what... guy shouldn't make gals cry...
agree. its a terrible thing to see your loved one cry because of a mistake from yourself. it will haunt you for life.
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Hey man.. sometimes... they just love to cry eh.
hehe
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Originally posted by gigabyte14:
guys, i made a terrible mistake...
its like i made a girl really sad, and cried too
its like im afraid of commitments, like i will automatically think far, and its like emotions will get the better of me in future... imagine, imagine i wanna go overseas study, or work, and in the end because of emotional ties i will be like choose everything other than my happiness
summore recently the ppl ard me are like divorce and breakup, it makes me think that everything can be so unpredictable, it freaks me out
religion clashes too, i know it wont affect me now, but in the future it'll definitely affect
shes happy, but im not, im just not the kind of commitment kinda person, and i just... made her cry
its like better to end the smaller picture in order to make the bigger picture work
am i doing the right thing?
Life is unpredictable
If you don't embrace your fear and live life as it is, you have never really lived. You may miss out on happiness just because you fear it will end badly.
Anyway, you're still young so you don't really need to talk about commitment in a relationship.
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Originally posted by I-like-flings(m):
no matter what... guy shouldn't make gals cry...
what if some ger cry easily how? -
Originally posted by gigabyte14:
guys, i made a terrible mistake...
its like i made a girl really sad, and cried too
its like im afraid of commitments, like i will automatically think far, and its like emotions will get the better of me in future... imagine, imagine i wanna go overseas study, or work, and in the end because of emotional ties i will be like choose everything other than my happiness
summore recently the ppl ard me are like divorce and breakup, it makes me think that everything can be so unpredictable, it freaks me out
religion clashes too, i know it wont affect me now, but in the future it'll definitely affect
shes happy, but im not, im just not the kind of commitment kinda person, and i just... made her cry
its like better to end the smaller picture in order to make the bigger picture work
am i doing the right thing?
Honestly, if you would to relook at what you have typed, your fear of
commitment has pervades every single mote of your thoughts and
rationalized them into some 'linear causal fashion' as if life indeed
runs in some orderly manner. Added with tint of non-related deduction
like social observation from people's failing relationship is kinda bull
as well.I find it absurd whenever people say things like 'everyone's relationship around me is failing' and they use it as a factor (no matter how minute) to deter them from engaging in possible meaningful relationship. It's almost like a gambler's fallacy, when you made use of factors that makes no sense to unique situations because every set of game is different - just like every possible combination of relationship in any given time is vastly different.
In US alone, one car-accident-related death is accounted for every passing 13 minutes. If we use the world statistic, it would probably be insane. So does that means that we don't walk the street or drive any cars because a number of people around us are dead because of car accident?
It doesn't matter what decision you make because the point of my post does not address the morality of your decision, which it is absolutely insubstantial to me. What is of a concern is how your conceptualize your reasoning which give rise to your final decision.
From what I am seeing, religious conflict is the only real issue. Well, perhaps you might want to be brutally honest with yourself on what's the real shit that isn't really workable here and avoid dumping unnecessary components in your reasoning to 'beef up' your justification - more quantity does not mean more reasonable.
Are you willing to compromise in the framework of a relationship or you prefer to pursue your individualistic goals? It does not necessarily be an either or, but in your own private scaling, how much are you willing to relent towards the other side of the scale that isn't part of your grand plan? Many times, there are middle grounds that we could tread, not just caught between a rock and a hard place.
Learn to remove 'rightness' and 'wrongness' in any decision. Decisions are neutral. There are only wise and unwise choices. Willing or unwilling choices. If you cannot determine what is wise and unwise, then you decide what you are willing or unwilling to undertake.
Cheers
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Originally posted by gigabyte14:
guys, i made a terrible mistake...
its like i made a girl really sad, and cried too
its like im afraid of commitments, like i will automatically think far, and its like emotions will get the better of me in future... imagine, imagine i wanna go overseas study, or work, and in the end because of emotional ties i will be like choose everything other than my happiness
summore recently the ppl ard me are like divorce and breakup, it makes me think that everything can be so unpredictable, it freaks me out
religion clashes too, i know it wont affect me now, but in the future it'll definitely affect
shes happy, but im not, im just not the kind of commitment kinda person, and i just... made her cry
its like better to end the smaller picture in order to make the bigger picture work
am i doing the right thing?
it's very good that you are thinking long term because when you get together with someone, things like those you have mentioned will definitely become a problem and will kill the relationship eventually.
first of all, she is too young for a long term relationship. it would be better to go with someone of similar age category. if you are an working adult, please go with another working adult. when people are in the same life stage, its easier for them to understand what you are going through. its difficult for a student to understand the concerns of a working adult.
when you go with someone, never have the idea of changing them. that is the most unlikely(0.001% chance of success) thing to happen and even if they do change, it's very unlikely that they changed according to what you wanted. if you cannot accept them for what they are, then don't waste your time and her time, just drop her and let her find her happiness elsewhere.
since you already know that it will not work out in the long term, it's good that you decided to end the relationship because it ain't going nowhere anyway. its better to end it now then later when both parties are more attached and will end up suffering more and find it harder to move on.
good luck finding Miss Right.
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Originally posted by Just_do_it_lah:
Simply_the_best_bear is right... move on...
Learn, Move on and Improve
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Eh thread deleted before i can read...