The Big 30
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Hi I turned 30 this year. I am really worried about my future.I think I am experiencing somehting like mid-quarter life crisis.
Worse still, I am single and most likely to remain so. My family is giving me undue pressure and it can be frustrating at times. Even tried to match make for me. But the guys they introduce are also very shy and have nothing to say to me.
Career wise, I am in a fix. I am just an ordinary worker doing administrative work. I do thought of going further but my age, experience and qualification won't help me further.
I started to worry about my future. How to support myself in future? My savings is very pathetic. I do not think I can afford a HDB flat when I turn 35 years old which is in 5 years time.
I afraid I am poor, old and lonely woman unable to cope with high cost of living and loneliness in the future. I cannot tell my friends because they may laugh at me. To begin with, I do not have many friends.I really need to vent out my frustration. I really feel very worried these days.
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Hey TS,
The first thing you will need to know is about yourself, what do you want to do.
The second thing, is to go and pursue your ambition or dream e.g. by taking up a degree or other further studies if you don't have one.
I am speaking from personal experience and have just started on the journey to improve myself, my life.
As for relationship, if you don't meet the one who will understands you and wish to walk on the path with you, then its ok to be a happy single...
Good luck my friend,
Simple Bear
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Originally posted by Angelatsai:
Hi I turned 30 this year. I am really worried about my future.I think I am experiencing somehting like mid-quarter life crisis.
Worse still, I am single and most likely to remain so. My family is giving me undue pressure and it can be frustrating at times. Even tried to match make for me. But the guys they introduce are also very shy and have nothing to say to me.
Career wise, I am in a fix. I am just an ordinary worker doing administrative work. I do thought of going further but my age, experience and qualification won't help me further.
I started to worry about my future. How to support myself in future? My savings is very pathetic. I do not think I can afford a HDB flat when I turn 35 years old which is in 5 years time.
I afraid I am poor, old and lonely woman unable to cope with high cost of living and loneliness in the future. I cannot tell my friends because they may laugh at me. To begin with, I do not have many friends.I really need to vent out my frustration. I really feel very worried these days.
You can try going for further qualifications. There are people much older than you going for their degree and such.
No point in just getting any guy which comes your way. It will be better to get someone who cares for you, rather than to get someone who is financial-wise relatively well but married you only because he is single as well.
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It is understandable the anxiety, the fear but understand this : If u are ''handling'' your life as it is now and coping that is more important than thinking of what tomorrow or the future might bring or never bring. The future or the tomorrow always come as today. Sadly, many forgo today and hope and wish and dream and the next thing is - they forgot to live!
Also, comparison is neurosis and is it a debilitating one. Comparison is disrespectful of onself. Seriousness is sickness>
I m not suggesting that u not pursue ... or think that it is ''wrong'' but understand that till u yourself want to do it -u may do it but it is going to be anguish and anxiety. Also, it is being and doing things cos everyone is doing it. Your intuitive heart never lies.
Otherwise, these so-called securities bandied about in terms of house, in terms of spouse and savings may seem ''rite'' but it would amount to nothing when one is split on the inside.
Those who think in terms of happiness n unhappiness - are unconsciously being divisive and hence the misery, the pain. it is utterly dense cos it is non-dual just as nite and day is non-dual. Acceptance of what u are - warts and all is a good start.
U came alone and u would go alone. What matters is whether u live and really live, instead of futurizing and living in fear what matters is whether there is a semblance of joy, of aliveness.
Beware the do-gooders!
PS - Your parents mean well but forget that they are imposing what may have ''worked'' or not ''worked'' for them.
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Originally posted by Angelatsai:
Hi I turned 30 this year. I am really worried about my future.I think I am experiencing somehting like mid-quarter life crisis.
Worse still, I am single and most likely to remain so. My family is giving me undue pressure and it can be frustrating at times. Even tried to match make for me. But the guys they introduce are also very shy and have nothing to say to me.
Career wise, I am in a fix. I am just an ordinary worker doing administrative work. I do thought of going further but my age, experience and qualification won't help me further.
I started to worry about my future. How to support myself in future? My savings is very pathetic. I do not think I can afford a HDB flat when I turn 35 years old which is in 5 years time.
I afraid I am poor, old and lonely woman unable to cope with high cost of living and loneliness in the future. I cannot tell my friends because they may laugh at me. To begin with, I do not have many friends.I really need to vent out my frustration. I really feel very worried these days.
.
I hate to break it to you miss, we single guys have it worse than you. Especially those who are approaching their late 20s. We get a lot of abuse from single girls who act like attention muppet seekers. I am sure you are not one of them but there are a lot of single girls that like to get attention from single guys, when we don't layan them, they get their koncos to cause disturbance and trouble to us.We single guys have it harder than you ladies. Its not that we want to be single, its just that we haven't found the right one. But we are always pushed by relatives, co-workers and others to get married.
In the office, we don't get any mercy at all, people can come up at us and speak to us in very degrading manner, we receive a lot of abuse because we are men and people think we can take it.
You on the other hand, have a big advantage, being a woman, people tend to be nicer to you. So there is nothing to worry about. As you don't have to be like us men, having to fend for ourselves and defend ourselves.
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Hey, lets be friends
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Originally posted by Angelatsai:
Hi I turned 30 this year. I am really worried about my future.I think I am experiencing somehting like mid-quarter life crisis.
Worse still, I am single and most likely to remain so. My family is giving me undue pressure and it can be frustrating at times. Even tried to match make for me. But the guys they introduce are also very shy and have nothing to say to me.
Career wise, I am in a fix. I am just an ordinary worker doing administrative work. I do thought of going further but my age, experience and qualification won't help me further.
I started to worry about my future. How to support myself in future? My savings is very pathetic. I do not think I can afford a HDB flat when I turn 35 years old which is in 5 years time.
I afraid I am poor, old and lonely woman unable to cope with high cost of living and loneliness in the future. I cannot tell my friends because they may laugh at me. To begin with, I do not have many friends.I really need to vent out my frustration. I really feel very worried these days.
What is wrong with being alone? You think being in a marriage is very good meh? Some people areunhappy in their marriages and their spouse having affairs.You people got the wrong concept, sometimes you allow your insecurity to overwhelm you that you believe that any single guy walking on legs would be an ideal partner. The first lesson is either you find somebody suitable or not. Don't force a guy to like you, guys hate these kind of women. So as long as you are nice and kind, hardworking, genuine, honest and good natured person, people will make an effort to get to know you. So may be you are not successful in finding a guy, but hey at least you know that you are genuine and you don't harass other guys to like you.
I have come across many attention seeking muppet women who come and disturb me, when I don't give them attention, they get other people like my boss to attack me, withhold work, threaten and wrongly accuse me. Are these good natured women? Of course not ! We men, dread women like that.
And another thing your insecurity is scaring all the men. Just be friendly and make friends but don't place terms and conditions on your friendship and have the purpose of turning your friends into future partners. Men can see thru that and it scares them. Be friendly and nice. So what if ? At least you made a friend. There is nothing wrong with making frens.
What laugh at yoU??? Single women gets all the respect they can. People think you are the weaker sex and gives you all teh support you need. We men, nobody respects us.
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Originally posted by Angelatsai:
Hi I turned 30 this year. I am really worried about my future.I think I am experiencing somehting like mid-quarter life crisis.
Worse still, I am single and most likely to remain so. My family is giving me undue pressure and it can be frustrating at times. Even tried to match make for me. But the guys they introduce are also very shy and have nothing to say to me.
Career wise, I am in a fix. I am just an ordinary worker doing administrative work. I do thought of going further but my age, experience and qualification won't help me further.
I started to worry about my future. How to support myself in future? My savings is very pathetic. I do not think I can afford a HDB flat when I turn 35 years old which is in 5 years time.
I afraid I am poor, old and lonely woman unable to cope with high cost of living and loneliness in the future. I cannot tell my friends because they may laugh at me. To begin with, I do not have many friends.I really need to vent out my frustration. I really feel very worried these days.
What is wrong with being alone? You think being in a marriage is very good meh? Some people areunhappy in their marriages and their spouse having affairs.You people got the wrong concept, sometimes you allow your insecurity to overwhelm you that you believe that any single guy walking on legs would be an ideal partner. The first lesson is either you find somebody suitable or not. Don't force a guy to like you, guys hate these kind of women. So as long as you are nice and kind, hardworking, genuine, honest and good natured person, people will make an effort to get to know you. So may be you are not successful in finding a guy, but hey at least you know that you are genuine and you don't harass other guys to like you.
I have come across many attention seeking muppet women who come and disturb me, when I don't give them attention, they get other people like my boss to attack me, withhold work, threaten and wrongly accuse me. Are these good natured women? Of course not ! We men, dread women like that.
And another thing your insecurity is scaring all the men. Just be friendly and make friends but don't place terms and conditions on your friendship and have the purpose of turning your friends into future partners. Men can see thru that and it scares them. Be friendly and nice. So what if ? At least you made a friend. There is nothing wrong with making frens.
What laugh at yoU??? Single women gets all the respect they can. People think you are the weaker sex and gives you all teh support you need. We men, nobody respects us.
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Originally posted by Angelatsai:
Hi I turned 30 this year. I am really worried about my future.I think I am experiencing somehting like mid-quarter life crisis.
Worse still, I am single and most likely to remain so. My family is giving me undue pressure and it can be frustrating at times. Even tried to match make for me. But the guys they introduce are also very shy and have nothing to say to me.
Career wise, I am in a fix. I am just an ordinary worker doing administrative work. I do thought of going further but my age, experience and qualification won't help me further.
I started to worry about my future. How to support myself in future? My savings is very pathetic. I do not think I can afford a HDB flat when I turn 35 years old which is in 5 years time.
I afraid I am poor, old and lonely woman unable to cope with high cost of living and loneliness in the future. I cannot tell my friends because they may laugh at me. To begin with, I do not have many friends.I really need to vent out my frustration. I really feel very worried these days.
What is wrong with being alone? You think being in a marriage is very good meh? Some people areunhappy in their marriages and their spouse having affairs.You people got the wrong concept, sometimes you allow your insecurity to overwhelm you that you believe that any single guy walking on legs would be an ideal partner. The first lesson is either you find somebody suitable or not. Don't force a guy to like you, guys hate these kind of women. So as long as you are nice and kind, hardworking, genuine, honest and good natured person, people will make an effort to get to know you. So may be you are not successful in finding a guy, but hey at least you know that you are genuine and you don't harass other guys to like you.
I have come across many attention seeking muppet women who come and disturb me, when I don't give them attention, they get other people like my boss to attack me, withhold work, threaten and wrongly accuse me. Are these good natured women? Of course not ! We men, dread women like that.
And another thing your insecurity is scaring all the men. Just be friendly and make friends but don't place terms and conditions on your friendship and have the purpose of turning your friends into future partners. Men can see thru that and it scares them. Be friendly and nice. So what if ? At least you made a friend. There is nothing wrong with making frens.
What laugh at yoU??? Single women gets all the respect they can. People think you are the weaker sex and gives you all teh support you need. We men, nobody respects us.
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Originally posted by Angelatsai:
Hi I turned 30 this year. I am really worried about my future.I think I am experiencing somehting like mid-quarter life crisis.
Worse still, I am single and most likely to remain so. My family is giving me undue pressure and it can be frustrating at times. Even tried to match make for me. But the guys they introduce are also very shy and have nothing to say to me.
Career wise, I am in a fix. I am just an ordinary worker doing administrative work. I do thought of going further but my age, experience and qualification won't help me further.
I started to worry about my future. How to support myself in future? My savings is very pathetic. I do not think I can afford a HDB flat when I turn 35 years old which is in 5 years time.
I afraid I am poor, old and lonely woman unable to cope with high cost of living and loneliness in the future. I cannot tell my friends because they may laugh at me. To begin with, I do not have many friends.I really need to vent out my frustration. I really feel very worried these days.
What is wrong with being alone? You think being in a marriage is very good meh? Some people areunhappy in their marriages and their spouse having affairs.You people got the wrong concept, sometimes you allow your insecurity to overwhelm you that you believe that any single guy walking on legs would be an ideal partner. The first lesson is either you find somebody suitable or not. Don't force a guy to like you, guys hate these kind of women. So as long as you are nice and kind, hardworking, genuine, honest and good natured person, people will make an effort to get to know you. So may be you are not successful in finding a guy, but hey at least you know that you are genuine and you don't harass other guys to like you.
I have come across many attention seeking muppet women who come and disturb me, when I don't give them attention, they get other people like my boss to attack me, withhold work, threaten and wrongly accuse me. Are these good natured women? Of course not ! We men, dread women like that.
And another thing your insecurity is scaring all the men. Just be friendly and make friends but don't place terms and conditions on your friendship and have the purpose of turning your friends into future partners. Men can see thru that and it scares them. Be friendly and nice. So what if ? At least you made a friend. There is nothing wrong with making frens.
What laugh at yoU??? Single women gets all the respect they can. People think you are the weaker sex and gives you all teh support you need. We men, nobody respects us.
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Mr Mancho Man,
You know why you are single.....? Because your repeated post is freaking people out!!!!!
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TS,
Well to meet people expand your social life...it doesn't have to be expensive. When the time is right you find the person.
Be happy stop worry let people see your personality shine.
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Originally posted by Arapahoe:
Mr Mancho Man,
You know why you are single.....? Because your repeated post is freaking people out!!!!!
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA.......................................
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Originally posted by Macho Man:
What is wrong with being alone? You think being in a marriage is very good meh? Some people areunhappy in their marriages and their spouse having affairs.You people got the wrong concept, sometimes you allow your insecurity to overwhelm you that you believe that any single guy walking on legs would be an ideal partner. The first lesson is either you find somebody suitable or not. Don't force a guy to like you, guys hate these kind of women. So as long as you are nice and kind, hardworking, genuine, honest and good natured person, people will make an effort to get to know you. So may be you are not successful in finding a guy, but hey at least you know that you are genuine and you don't harass other guys to like you.
I have come across many attention seeking muppet women who come and disturb me, when I don't give them attention, they get other people like my boss to attack me, withhold work, threaten and wrongly accuse me. Are these good natured women? Of course not ! We men, dread women like that.
And another thing your insecurity is scaring all the men. Just be friendly and make friends but don't place terms and conditions on your friendship and have the purpose of turning your friends into future partners. Men can see thru that and it scares them. Be friendly and nice. So what if ? At least you made a friend. There is nothing wrong with making frens.
What laugh at yoU??? Single women gets all the respect they can. People think you are the weaker sex and gives you all teh support you need. We men, nobody respects us.
LOL, I couldn't stop laughing when I read this. Thanks you just made my day.Muppet woman? ROFLMAO!HAHAHAHAHA!!!!
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Originally posted by Macho Man:
What is wrong with being alone? You think being in a marriage is very good meh? Some people areunhappy in their marriages and their spouse having affairs.You people got the wrong concept, sometimes you allow your insecurity to overwhelm you that you believe that any single guy walking on legs would be an ideal partner. The first lesson is either you find somebody suitable or not. Don't force a guy to like you, guys hate these kind of women. So as long as you are nice and kind, hardworking, genuine, honest and good natured person, people will make an effort to get to know you. So may be you are not successful in finding a guy, but hey at least you know that you are genuine and you don't harass other guys to like you.
I have come across many attention seeking muppet women who come and disturb me, when I don't give them attention, they get other people like my boss to attack me, withhold work, threaten and wrongly accuse me. Are these good natured women? Of course not ! We men, dread women like that.
And another thing your insecurity is scaring all the men. Just be friendly and make friends but don't place terms and conditions on your friendship and have the purpose of turning your friends into future partners. Men can see thru that and it scares them. Be friendly and nice. So what if ? At least you made a friend. There is nothing wrong with making frens.
What laugh at yoU??? Single women gets all the respect they can. People think you are the weaker sex and gives you all teh support you need. We men, nobody respects us.
This para reminds me of a few threads...
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Originally posted by Arapahoe:
Mr Mancho Man,
You know why you are single.....? Because your repeated post is freaking people out!!!!!
Internet was slow, so I didn't know clicking the reply several times would result in many replies.
I only intend to freak Muppet women who want to seek attention and want absurb constant attention from single guys. No intention to freak Angelatsai, just letting her know that there is more than live to desperately getting married.
There are a lot of unhappy marriages. I have a lot of friends who have parents in their 50s who have no choice but to stay together just to get along,they stop loving each other, they stop talking to each other, only argue over money, property and nag nag nag.
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Don't waste time fretting. Start Planning.
You're an able bodied person. Plan to live independently, so that you would not need to rely on anyone in future. No point wishing for a Mr Right to support you financially.
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well u sounded like the lady who rejected me 10 years ago when I go after her. she's still single and in the 30s. Not sure about her job but she keep changing. she's still contact me rarely on msn or facebook etc.
Did someone ever go after you and you rejected him before?
else try those agencies. do some make up. slim down, etc. make yourself better and find a bf lo. that to do.
where did all your money went to? at 30s with no money? u spend alot of money? well a simple saving plan might help. if you worried and want to get married to a decent guy then don't pick so much.
hoping for a james bond or a superman is what most woman of your state ...
I remember one chubby, ordinary looking lady which have a rather rude lcharacter ady friend said these: I might not have the charm but doesn't mean I cannot pick the guy I want"
There's this friend called pual, he've been going after her for sometime. no a bad guy. not bad look, not bad $$$. drive and thrift. we all asked him why go after her becos she's those" never make it" type. She REJECTED him and after FEW YEAR, he gave up. met a PRETTY CUTE PETITE well mannered lady and settled down. 5 years passed. the chubby lady have turned into a FAT, AGED WOMAN.
OK... the morale of the story ==== OBI-GOOD ..
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angela tsai,
fret not. happiness is not about external factors. You must regain your independence and strength from others. Just because they are your family does not mean that you have to live for other people expectations.
Ya, you maybe poor but u should still respect your job and your honest work. You are unhappy because you yourself know that you need to improve. So the point is that you must take acknowledgement for your own life , take responsibility.
You are unhappy because you have not been an active role in your own life. Now its the time to create that self awareness. Once you take action, you will gradually regain your happiness, regardless whether you have a man or not.
The husband issue is just a distraction. its not your main problem. But of course you still have to work to find your man concurrently. Wish you good luck
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join a religious group (church, temple, etc youth group) and socialize from there.
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Solution: Go look for Ang Mo.
Ang Mo have no taste and they like Asian: a lot. A lot of Ang Mo come here to work as expatriates and they are divorcees. Ang Mo who come here are those who have grown frustrated of demanding and indenpendent Ang Mo women. They just want simple Asian house wife. My Auntie who is 42 thought it is end of the world for her because no singaporean men want to marry her as her age has gone beyond child bearing age. She changed her job as a real estate agent for well to do expatriates seeking fully furnished luxury apartments. She met and befriended many Ang Mo. One day one of her friend, a British expat Ang Mo invited her to a christmas party and she met this French divorcee expat. Immediately the French guy use his French charm to tackle her. She accepted him and they got married. Now the French guy has transferred back to France and brought her back to see his kids who are now teenagers. So good ! Now not only got husband but also kids and don't even need to child birth. She is currently living in Paris, as a good tai tai staying at home and taking up French lessons.