life problems rgding parents and my future
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Hi all, I am StressBoy, a Singaporean, thank you very much for reading this, any helpful advice, comment or feedback will be sincerely appreciated thanks. Lastly, sorry for being very longwinded here and my poor language used here.
I have been facing the following problem, it’s causing me to be stressed and sad everyday and sometimes also angry with myself whenever I think about it. This is sadly a daily affair because it’s a life problem regarding my parent’s and my future.
My Background info:
Father: 60+ years old, only primary school education, working as a private school bus driver earning about 3K/mth or maybe a little more. He is going to retired in about a few years time as his bus is going to reach its maximum usage age thus needs to be scrapped. And it cost too much to buy a new or secondhand bus as business is not as good as before too many competitors. Not sure what he is going to do after that or just retire and enjoy his old age as he should deserve it, he has been working hard for most of his life, wakes up 5am comes back at 8+pm. I am proud and thankful of him.
Mother: 50+ years old, only primary school education, housewife and follows my dad’s bus as a conductor, sadly about 3 years back she suddenly gotten Kidney Failure due to the cause of taking too many medicines since young as my mum has not been a very healthy person, she for example has asthmas. She now can only live if she has a kidney transplant or do not miss her kidney dialysis sessions every week which is very sad. She now has to go Kidney Dialysis 3 times a week at a private dialysis clinic, which cost about $200 each time so tats about $2400/mth excluding medicines, checkup and monthly doctor appointments. Luckily she has a government insurance called “medishield” I think to subsidize her maximum of $1000 every month, but this subsidization has a limit of I think 200K then we are on our own. Therefore, for now my dad still can handle her bills. We tried asking about NKF, but due to my father’s earning it will only be just a little lesser than the private one she is going now which has a good professional doctor and staff and also I heard that NKF staffs are sometimes volunteers in my opinion is not good as it’s a matter of life and death if you what I am trying to say, I believe Life > Money.
Elder Brother: Late twenties, Married, earning about I think 3 to 4K/mth excluding his wife, not sure how much she earns. Has a flat with his wife far away from us. But problem is that his wife controls as in really control all his cash and him, so he has never contributed to the family income since he worked. I am not very close with him due to the age gap, to me he is the root to my main problem as being the eldest son he doesn’t even contribute a single cent even when now my mum has such a serious and expensive illness. But, my mum is ok with that as he is her most favorite son as long as he comes back home to see her she will be very happy already, but sadly such as a easy task he also can’t do due to him been overly controlled by his wife, he doesn’t come back much like only 1 or 2 times a month that’s all. So when my dad retires my parents only has me to depend on, which I don’t think I can handle such important and heavy responsibilities on my own.
Lastly Me: I am, male, single, 21 years old this year, when I entered NS, I started thinking about my future and all these problems started to surface. I will ORD or finish my NS next year August. I have a Electrical and Electronic Diploma (DEEE) from the Singapore Polytechnics with a GPA of 2.8. But I do not like engineering, just got into the course because I followed my friends, which is one of the bad decisions I made in life. This GPA is not enough to get me into a local university unless it’s a private one like SIM or MDIS. I currently do not know what I want to work as or have a dream job, but I know I do not want to sign on as a regular for the SAF as I need to be in Singapore at all times in case of an emergency at home as my brother is either very hard to contact or nearly impossible to get to.
Thank You again for your patience for reading the above, I just wanted to be clear and accurate and not miss out on anything important. Please leave my brother out of the solutions thanks, as I think he is hopeless unless he leaves his wife, but that is impossible as he love her a lot.
Now for the problems I am and been facing:
1) Should I continue to get a 3 years business degree in one of the private universities after my NS? Money wise I think I can get a bank study loan. Because a diploma holder’s pay will be surely not enough to pay for my mum’s medical bill what more my parents and my daily expenses and house bills.
2) Money problem: When my dad retires, how am I going to pay for all the bills? Though I think my dad has some savings but I think it’s not much to last long. As a diploma holder I can only get like a starting pay of below 1.8K/mth and after like 10 years I think I can’t even hit the 3K/mth mark without a degree.
3) What jobs do you recommend I should work excluding engineering if I don’t continue my studies and not sign on SAF for the reason I stated above? How to find my ideal or dream job?
4) Any real estate agent out there can tell me more about your job? I am kind of interested about it. Will it be a good job for my current situation? Cause I heard if I can work hard I can earn good money, is it true? I plan to be single so as to be committed to my job to earn as much as I can to support my parents to give them a comfortable live like they work hard for my brother and me.
5) Where can I get further free counseling or consultation or advice on my problems?
6) Any helpful financial advice or experience will be appreciated also thx a lot.
Any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above will be much appreciated. Thank You.
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Hi, these are some advices that i have
1) Recommended and encouraged to take up a degree, money wise if there is a problem. Ns can subsidize uni fees if i am not wrong, not sure about that. The tricky part is that they require you to sign on.You can fish for more info in NS or someone can answer this here
2) Part time jobs. Cant really help much here. In Ns if you are lucky and get posted to a slack unit. You can moonlight. But remember '' you can do what you want, just dont get caught''
3) Depends on your interest
4) -
5) If you have any lecturer or teacher in SP that you can be frank and confortable with, you can seek help from them. I am sure they provide the best advice career and studies wise.
6) -
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It'll be quite hard to get much subsidies from NKF or other govt agencies, because your elder brother is working. Seriously, your parents should talk sense into your brother to help out. Worse case scenario, there's a law in S'pore that 'forces' children to support their parents, but it's really a last resort, as your family relationship will never be the same again.
You may need to do part-time job, and your dad can find alternative jobs after his career as a bus-driver ends. Next few years, financial matters will get much more difficult, so you have to take care, and make more future preparations, starting now.
Property sales will be bad next few years, as most people will hang on to their existing homes for security, unless it's to downgrade to get cash. Buying a 2nd home for investment or upgrading homes will be extremely unlikely. You can consider giving tuition in your spare-time, starting now, if possible. Or if you have other talents or skills, you can find some other project-basis jobs to get more money. Do consider selling unnecessary luxuries/items too, as health is more important than luxuries.
Rainbow Jigsaw of Life
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You just reminded me of the importance of education. I am currently still doing my JC education. You cannot turn back the clock to brush up your grades anymore but you can still work hard in the future. Your filial piety towards you parents will surely be rewarded. If only your brother had some of that, maybe your burden would not be so great.
Although I cannot help you with your problems, I want to say that you are a great son. Your parents who are working hard will definitely be very proud of you. Keep optimistic and don't give up. You will pull through and you will definitely grow out of your problems!
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TS,
You are not ready to take on any life problems nor your Parents problems. therefore, u should not get further worried or angry. Money problem is part of social problems for most singaporean.
There is no reason to blame others. Your brother has his own problem and life. Take a caculator and u will soon discovered disposable cash after CPF isn't alot and have to pay loans, other bills and living expenses.
anyway i've seen worst. so You will pull thru. not to worry.
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i feel quite sorry for you. but i must thank you for what was to me quite the timely and poignant reminder about the realities faced by so many out there
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Shortcake,
You are carrying too much burden on yourself. Worry unnecessarily and streessing yourself out for naught.
Your father may be in his 60s, but you don't have to plan for his retirement yet. The most he may do is go into semi-retirement, or take up another job he enjoys doing.If he had been working his whole life since a young age, I'm pretty sure he has himself a nestegg to fall back on.
Since you and your brother are no longer financially dependent on him, life is actually easier on his financial front. Now he can focus on taking care of your mother.
You are resentful to your brother because he did not contribute to this household you live in. But you must understsand that he has to support his own household too. How many children does he has ?
You shouldn't blame everything on his wife. Your brother has his own brain too, a family decision on their limited resources cannot be withheld by a single person. It's easy to push the blame on an outsider ( your sister in law), but that's not fair to her is it ? Using her as your public enemy #1 doesn't help family cohesion, it will only cause more friction within.
I'm sure your parents never ask you for donation. You give of your own free will, out of gratitude.
Don't expect everyone else around you to do what you do. They each have their own problems to deal with and they utilise their resources as they need. No one lives your life, and you don't live their's either.
You are still free of commitment, consider a part time degree in the evenings while you can. That way you get your education and not have to sacrifice your income. It's also a good way to expand your social network.
Engineer or business, your success does not depend on just a piece of paper. It's how you work that knowledge and personality to get what you need in life. Many times, engineers becomes businessmen, and businessmen becomes engineers. If you don't have the knowledge and experience, you're screwed anyway.
Focus on your future. Plan for rainy days. As long as you don't become yet another "burden" , I'm sure your parents will heave a sigh of relief. A child's personal success ( not just dollar, more sense) is the greatest gift to any proud parent.
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I belive you are one person that will make it big in the near future , u identify the problems in your life and u try to face it and not run away from it. I admire your courage and mental strength to move forward. Dun give up no matter how gloomy the future may seem to be , remember that your parents needs you dearly. All the best.
The Penguin
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Originally posted by Shortcake78:
Now for the problems I am and been facing:1) Should I continue to get a 3 years business degree in one of the private universities after my NS? Money wise I think I can get a bank study loan. Because a diploma holder’s pay will be surely not enough to pay for my mum’s medical bill what more my parents and my daily expenses and house bills.
2) Money problem: When my dad retires, how am I going to pay for all the bills? Though I think my dad has some savings but I think it’s not much to last long. As a diploma holder I can only get like a starting pay of below 1.8K/mth and after like 10 years I think I can’t even hit the 3K/mth mark without a degree.
3) What jobs do you recommend I should work excluding engineering if I don’t continue my studies and not sign on SAF for the reason I stated above? How to find my ideal or dream job?
4) Any real estate agent out there can tell me more about your job? I am kind of interested about it. Will it be a good job for my current situation? Cause I heard if I can work hard I can earn good money, is it true? I plan to be single so as to be committed to my job to earn as much as I can to support my parents to give them a comfortable live like they work hard for my brother and me.
5) Where can I get further free counseling or consultation or advice on my problems?
6) Any helpful financial advice or experience will be appreciated also thx a lot.
Any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above will be much appreciated. Thank You.
Shortcake. First problem is yourself why you want to take up all the problem yourself ? How can you leave your parent & bro out of the equation.
Wait till your father retired, then family meeting, to sort out how much you can contribute, let your dad & mum deal with your bro !!! If your dad & mum love him so much that she not willing to ask him for money till she willing to give up her life - then so be it !!! It is your dad and mum responsiblilty to go after your brother for money, not yours. You did your part contributing what you can, the rest of the problem is your dad, mun and your brother need to sort.My friend is in the same situation last time, father sick medicial bill, whole family act blur - he pay and pay. When he realise that money ask for not only use to pay medical bills but also go buy toto !!! Of course everyone is happy when there is sucker paying for it. Finally he took the right step, have a family meeting, lay out how much he can afford to give. This force dad, mun,bro and sis work out how to fund the rest. Frankly it work, when all those suckers are force to face the fact, and all contribute.
My advice is for you to work - get some job experience and do part time degree.
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Originally posted by Shortcake78:
Hi all, I am StressBoy, a Singaporean, thank you very much for reading this, any helpful advice, comment or feedback will be sincerely appreciated thanks. Lastly, sorry for being very longwinded here and my poor language used here.
I have been facing the following problem, it’s causing me to be stressed and sad everyday and sometimes also angry with myself whenever I think about it. This is sadly a daily affair because it’s a life problem regarding my parent’s and my future.
My Background info:
Father: 60+ years old, only primary school education, working as a private school bus driver earning about 3K/mth or maybe a little more. He is going to retired in about a few years time as his bus is going to reach its maximum usage age thus needs to be scrapped. And it cost too much to buy a new or secondhand bus as business is not as good as before too many competitors. Not sure what he is going to do after that or just retire and enjoy his old age as he should deserve it, he has been working hard for most of his life, wakes up 5am comes back at 8+pm. I am proud and thankful of him.
Mother: 50+ years old, only primary school education, housewife and follows my dad’s bus as a conductor, sadly about 3 years back she suddenly gotten Kidney Failure due to the cause of taking too many medicines since young as my mum has not been a very healthy person, she for example has asthmas. She now can only live if she has a kidney transplant or do not miss her kidney dialysis sessions every week which is very sad. She now has to go Kidney Dialysis 3 times a week at a private dialysis clinic, which cost about $200 each time so tats about $2400/mth excluding medicines, checkup and monthly doctor appointments. Luckily she has a government insurance called “medishield” I think to subsidize her maximum of $1000 every month, but this subsidization has a limit of I think 200K then we are on our own. Therefore, for now my dad still can handle her bills. We tried asking about NKF, but due to my father’s earning it will only be just a little lesser than the private one she is going now which has a good professional doctor and staff and also I heard that NKF staffs are sometimes volunteers in my opinion is not good as it’s a matter of life and death if you what I am trying to say, I believe Life > Money.
Elder Brother: Late twenties, Married, earning about I think 3 to 4K/mth excluding his wife, not sure how much she earns. Has a flat with his wife far away from us. But problem is that his wife controls as in really control all his cash and him, so he has never contributed to the family income since he worked. I am not very close with him due to the age gap, to me he is the root to my main problem as being the eldest son he doesn’t even contribute a single cent even when now my mum has such a serious and expensive illness. But, my mum is ok with that as he is her most favorite son as long as he comes back home to see her she will be very happy already, but sadly such as a easy task he also can’t do due to him been overly controlled by his wife, he doesn’t come back much like only 1 or 2 times a month that’s all. So when my dad retires my parents only has me to depend on, which I don’t think I can handle such important and heavy responsibilities on my own.
Lastly Me: I am, male, single, 21 years old this year, when I entered NS, I started thinking about my future and all these problems started to surface. I will ORD or finish my NS next year August. I have a Electrical and Electronic Diploma (DEEE) from the Singapore Polytechnics with a GPA of 2.8. But I do not like engineering, just got into the course because I followed my friends, which is one of the bad decisions I made in life. This GPA is not enough to get me into a local university unless it’s a private one like SIM or MDIS. I currently do not know what I want to work as or have a dream job, but I know I do not want to sign on as a regular for the SAF as I need to be in Singapore at all times in case of an emergency at home as my brother is either very hard to contact or nearly impossible to get to.
Thank You again for your patience for reading the above, I just wanted to be clear and accurate and not miss out on anything important. Please leave my brother out of the solutions thanks, as I think he is hopeless unless he leaves his wife, but that is impossible as he love her a lot.
Now for the problems I am and been facing:
1) Should I continue to get a 3 years business degree in one of the private universities after my NS? Money wise I think I can get a bank study loan. Because a diploma holder’s pay will be surely not enough to pay for my mum’s medical bill what more my parents and my daily expenses and house bills.
2) Money problem: When my dad retires, how am I going to pay for all the bills? Though I think my dad has some savings but I think it’s not much to last long. As a diploma holder I can only get like a starting pay of below 1.8K/mth and after like 10 years I think I can’t even hit the 3K/mth mark without a degree.
3) What jobs do you recommend I should work excluding engineering if I don’t continue my studies and not sign on SAF for the reason I stated above? How to find my ideal or dream job?
4) Any real estate agent out there can tell me more about your job? I am kind of interested about it. Will it be a good job for my current situation? Cause I heard if I can work hard I can earn good money, is it true? I plan to be single so as to be committed to my job to earn as much as I can to support my parents to give them a comfortable live like they work hard for my brother and me.
5) Where can I get further free counseling or consultation or advice on my problems?
6) Any helpful financial advice or experience will be appreciated also thx a lot.
Any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above will be much appreciated. Thank You.
hi shortcake , i feel that you are looking at too little options
open up ur options to financial planning and other home-based business like PC repairs.I am sure u can earn while u study in a full-time degree in singapore
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Hi guys, thanks alot for the comments and advices.
Please do keep them coming thx, they are really helpping me think, reflect and giving me more options to choose from in life.
Btw for those tat asked, my bro has no children.
Once again, any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above will be much appreciated.
Thank You.
"I hope to see the light of this neverending dark tunnel soon...."
*Shortcake*
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get your brother to help... .
stay strong
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Hi Shortcake, from your post, we can all see that you have analyse and understand almost completely what's happening to you and around you. You have won half the battle, at least you identified the problems, the next time is rectifying the problems step by step.
You can call your brother or ask him out and sit down and have a good talk. He already have his own family and might not be as clear as you of the situation that's happening or is going to happen soon.
Like what other forumers said, you don't have to give up on getting a degree. Go find out which uni is offering subsidies for students/NSF and what exactly you want to study and pursue. Be sure of what you want to study and pursue in life, no point taking up a degree blindly.You can work while studying part-time at the same time, it's gonna be quite tiring and requires discipline but Im sure you can succeed. :) -
I was in ur situation once about ur parents .i took my brother to a tribunal called Parents maintenance Court then i got the maintenance from my bro through the court n i never regretted once i did it cause now he knows he has to pay or go to court again which nobody likes but sometimes u need to go through the hard way if the easy way dosnt work so dont wait even if u can support but they should chip in as well as thier duty to the parent ,though i was worried the relation with my bro will be strined it was for only a short while n now its back to normal so go ahead n do it cause its ur duty to make him realise .Its at SLF building in Thompson road.
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Hi guys, thanks alot again for the care and concern, relpies and the helpful comments and advices.
***I won't be able to reply for the next few days cause i will be in camp, but please do keep them coming in thx, they are really helpping me think, reflect and giving me more options to choose from in life.
Hmm btw I think I will bring the matter to court like some has adviced only as a last resort, when I have tried my best with other solutions and fail and also when i am older with a stable job.
As if i am not wrong these court case thingy is not cheap and may ruin my family's harmony and relationship, i won't want to see my parents sad.
Anyone know someone who have studied at SIM/MDIS or graduated from there? How are they doing now? How is their pay like? I am kinda keen on taking on SIM's 3 years business degree course after my NS, but not sure if it is worth my time and money.
Or should I just go work full time instead cause during this 3 years if i don't further my education I I can atleast earn abt $50k(before spenting) which i think can really help my parents and mum's medical bill.
Once again, any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above will be much appreciated.
Thank You.
"I hope to see the light of this neverending dark tunnel soon...."
*Shortcake*
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Originally posted by Shortcake78:
Hi guys, thanks alot again for the care and concern, relpies and the helpful comments and advices.
***I won't be able to reply for the next few days cause i will be in camp, but please do keep them coming in thx, they are really helpping me think, reflect and giving me more options to choose from in life.
Hmm btw I think I will bring the matter to court like some has adviced only as a last resort, when I have tried my best with other solutions and fail and also when i am older with a stable job.
As if i am not wrong these court case thingy is not cheap and may ruin my family's harmony and relationship, i won't want to see my parents sad.
Anyone know someone who have studied at SIM/MDIS or graduated from there? How are they doing now? How is their pay like? I am kinda keen on taking on SIM's 3 years business degree course after my NS, but not sure if it is worth my time and money.
Or should I just go work full time instead cause during this 3 years if i don't further my education I I can atleast earn abt $50k(before spenting) which i think can really help my parents and mum's medical bill.
Once again, any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above will be much appreciated.
Thank You.
"I hope to see the light of this neverending dark tunnel soon...."
*Shortcake*
Though it's not easy for people in general to understand the reasons for what I'm saying now, but I can only advise:
Forget about using current job market and financial planning info to plan for the reality of the future in a couple of years' time. Unless your family has enough savings to support your family (including all medical expenses) without income (since you're not working yet) for a few years, I strongly recommend that your family starts planning how to get money now for your parents' future medical needs.
Life ahead will not be as comfortable as it is now. I'm stressing this to you only because you are a good kid.
Rainbow Jigsaw of Life
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Hi guys =)
Sorry for the late reply jus came back from camp, but gg back in again tmr....
Thanks alot again for the care and concern, relpies and the helpful comments and advices.
*Currently, I am still lost on whether I should carry on my studies for a private degree at SIM/MDIS for the next 3 years after my NS, which I know will surely help my career in future some way or another.
*Or save up tat large amt of money and go straight to work to help out with the house and my mum's medical bills.
*Isit really worth it getting a private degree cause from what I see it's not very recognize in Singapore as the local Unis NUS/NTU/SMU degrees are what employers want.
*Will the private degree help in my future job promotion/advancement?
Once again, any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above 1st post will be much appreciated. My background info is at the top.
Thank You.
"I hope to see the light of this neverending dark tunnel soon...."
*Shortcake*
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try talking and writing to the MP constantly about your mum dialysis issues esp. in view of your mandatory NS (and we all know NS pay is not pay but allowance less than a cleaner)..
perhaps that might help...
wish you all the best and for edu...SIM/ SMU is next best...
do have a clear view of your career - because that is the only thing that could help you and your mum...
a degree is important....money that pays the career u choose is even more important..
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buy some of these and hope for the best....
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Originally posted by Shortcake78:
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Father: 60+ years old, only primary school education, working as a private school bus driver earning about 3K/mth or maybe a little more. He is going to retired in about a few years time as his bus is going to reach its maximum usage age thus needs to be scrapped. And it cost too much to buy a new or secondhand bus as business is not as good as before too many competitors. Not sure what he is going to do after that or just retire and enjoy his old age as he should deserve it, he has been working hard for most of his life, wakes up 5am comes back at 8+pm. I am proud and thankful of him.
...that's high for a bus driver...more than SBS/SMRTB bus captain/service leader... -
Originally posted by Shortcake78:
Hi guys =)
Sorry for the late reply jus came back from camp, but gg back in again tmr....
Thanks alot again for the care and concern, relpies and the helpful comments and advices.
*Currently, I am still lost on whether I should carry on my studies for a private degree at SIM/MDIS for the next 3 years after my NS, which I know will surely help my career in future some way or another.
*Or save up tat large amt of money and go straight to work to help out with the house and my mum's medical bills.
*Isit really worth it getting a private degree cause from what I see it's not very recognize in Singapore as the local Unis NUS/NTU/SMU degrees are what employers want.
*Will the private degree help in my future job promotion/advancement?
Once again, any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above 1st post will be much appreciated. My background info is at the top.
Thank You.
"I hope to see the light of this neverending dark tunnel soon...."
*Shortcake*
shortcake,
A degree does not guarantee your career success. What it does is increase your career ceiling.
Higher positions in the corporate world always require a degree minimum. But it does not means that anyone with a degree is eligible, you still have to prove your capability first.
However, without a degree, even when you are the best person to take that promotion after working hard for years at the company, the management will not be able to promote you because you lack that piece of paper. You will likely be bypassed by someone more junior than you who does have a degree.
NUS/NTU or other government funded universities are more recognized because they are well established and employers know the curriculum and standards well.
If you prefer private, just make sure you go with the well established brands, not some kuching kurak Universities name no one ever heard of.
It's all about credibilities. Their teaching staff and curriculums.
People in higher managements are alumnis in private, public funded and/or overseas universities themselves. So private or public doesn't really matter.
Personally, I prefer private universities because they tend to be more flexible and customer oriented. Although they tend to be more expensive. ( I think, so do your research on the costs).
Good universities , private or public, teach the same core subjects anyway ( with minor differences in electives etc.) So either way you won't go wrong.
Know what you are good at, and find your own path.
You should consult your parents on the financial decision. It's foolish to put yourself in a quandary without finding out the real position first.
Your mother's condition is not dire yet. And your father doesn't seem to be in a financial fix either.
If they are willing to financially support you on top of their current financial liabilities, then you should graciously accept their assistance and do your best in your academic achievements.
All parents wants to be able to provide for their children, it's their pride and joy. Besides, it's only for the next 3 years, better than having to subsidise you for the rest of your life right ?
The last thing they want is uncertainty on your part. If you are unsure of your decision/ability to finish the degree well, then it's best you don't waste their money.
If they clearly expressed their inability to provide financial support, then you have to figure out your own way to pay yourself through school or seek full time employment.
However, in life, you have to expect the unexpected. There will be situations when events can change all your well thought out plans. Just learn to adjust and adapt.
Good luck.
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Look at what the bible says.The bible has all the useful advices to life problems.Look at what Paul said in the New Testament,If we have food and clothing, we should be satisfied.You have enough food and clothing, you should be content.A lot of people in this world still have problems with food and clothing.
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Hi all =D
Thank alot for all the new replies, advices and the care and concern. And thx again for those tat have perviously replied and adviced.
I currently have decided on the following for now:
- Think and find what degree course i really want and like to study before i ORD
- Take a full-time degree from either SIM/MDIS after my NS
- Find and get a part-time job during my 3 years of studies, so as to gain some income and working experience
***But i am still very worried, lost and can't seem to solve the following 4 problems:
- Money problem: When my dad retires at 70, how am I going to pay for all the bills? Though I think my dad has some savings but I think it’s not much to last long
- After i get a private degree i will be already abt 26yo and with starting pay of abt 2K to 2.3K/mth. Cause from what i hear private degree holders get much lesser pay and slower pay increment than local gov (NUS/NTU/SMU) degree holders right?
- Will i be able to hit the 3K/mth mark in 4 years of work when i hit 30yo? Cause by then my dad will surely retired as he will be 70 or 71yo already.
- As i have roughly calculated tat i need to earn abt 3k/mth to be able to pay for my mum's expensive medical bills (2k+/mth), house bills, insurance, my parents and my daily expenses. With nothing left to save which i don't mind as long as my parents are taken care off and not have to suffer.
Once again, any helpful advice, past similar experience, comment or feedback or links on my problems above 4 problems will be much appreciated. My background info is at the top.
Thank You. I just want to let u guys know tat every reply and advice given to me makes a difference and is aidding me in getting one step closer to finding a solution to slove my life problems, thx and god bless.
"I hope to see the light of this neverending dark tunnel soon...."
*Shortcake*
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shortcake, i believe ya elder brother with higher earning power,more or less established in his own career should help to chip on for now at the least, you will need a few years or so to be career-established and financially stable, in order to take up the responsibility.
The bottomline is you must secure your ownself, be for you can secure your loved ones.
It's much the same as if you can't help yourself, how can you help others.
Your elder brother has the means to do so and yet refuses to do so, that is what he really is in true color, and you can never expect help and assistance from him in the future.
If own parents refuse to support, do u think he will help you should u be in distress in the future? With parental responsibilities as well, you must secure your own future and your finances more than ever.