Life for Dummies :)
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Wrote this on the bus while watching the world go by
Is it that a person like me is truly bohemian by nature or is it that I lack the set of skills to create bonds with anyone?
To be honest I just find the boring mundane day to day life extremely boring. My perpetual need for human contact and excitement is simply to keep me moderately sane. I do enjoy some extremities such as drugs but for now, that is nothing but a closed chapter in my book.
The main issue you might ask is why do I behave is such a narcissistic way?
To give you an honest answer it is to find a simple yet happy life by no means subjecting myself to the completely orthodox way of living. I mean to be honest why not be happy and do what you want for god sake. Live free and be the person you were born to be. There is of course no justifiable reason for hurting others along your way and/or not repaying gratitude unless of course you happen to be a complete and utter douche.
One might question if this is still applicable if let's say my parents want me to grow up and be a doctor and I'm supposed to study my ass off have no social life forever so I don’t hurt them. O please are you really going to buy into that self sacrificial bullshit? I mean really now, what your parents want is to make you the best that you can be in order to enjoy a good successful and HAPPY future. So if at the end of the day you have lived a full, virtuous life and happy life I truly don't see what is the fucking problem?
Fine let's go to say you are into that self sacrificial bullshit and study hard blah blah try your best to get that fancy piece of paper to hang on your wall while giving up your youth and everything fun. At the end of the day ending up as a "enter race here" scrooge mcduck with loads of cash and lots of cash to spend on your three spoiled nephews and son.
Recognize that money only opens up doorways and yes many that may grant you temporal happiness while true happiness is nowhere to be found.
True happiness in my opinion lies within oneself and exploring ones soul. Money helps, so make a fucking fortune by learning to be smart and streetwise like bill gates or something! There are loads of ways to actually fulfil your desires as well as earn a decent living that enables you to pursue your hobbies as well as fulfil your life.
Honestly most vices are and will be detrimental to your health.
Let's touch on smoking first. So why so you smoke? Peer pressure? Not enough manhood to say no?
All this can be simply summarized into one word: weakness. It may have been your ex-girlfriend that smoked like a chimney or the group of young smoketards you were in as a youth and inadvertently got hooked.
What does it do to you? Help you unwind, makes you feel good or looks well with your jacket. Admittedly smoking is one if the more forgivable vices aside from alcohol but we will touch on that a little later. It does give you a sense of relief but at the cost and blackened lungs and a chronic breathing problem in the near completely unforeseeable future. It's all essentially about cost and consequence as well as control.
Now moving on to the most drank thing besides water, alcohol.
Alcohol is essentially vice and temporal buffing in your confidence, foolhardiness and your ability to see slamming any chick raw dog as cool. It is however known as liquid courage and the ability to drink will help you along somewhere down the road where you will be required to drink. Let's not forget to always drink while well aware of your limit so as to avoid passing out, puking all over yourself and have your idiot frat-boy friend’s stick a beer tube up your ass and posting pictures of it on Facebook. Drinking loads may seem to impress girls for the moment but the true opportunity lies in being the only sober idiot there to send them home and possibly get some nice pussy. You can do both and train consistently, no short cuts you pussy.
Talking about shortcuts, drugs on the other hand have another name which is cut short. The cutting short of your sanity and temporarily lobotomizing you leaving you completely vulnerable to your own mind and imagination which can be quite scary you sick bondage fetish bastard. It is a awesome social experience where there can be lots of sex and happiness but it is as temporal as your premature ejaculation. The fact of the matter is you slept with the slut that your dad banged and now have his herpes as well of the rest of your life problems awaiting you in re land of the sober. Of course I have tried drugs before and refrained from such stupid activity and merely explored the infinite possibility of my mind which was enough enjoyment. Now understand that whoever says they are addicted to drugs and can't quit is a complete and utter liar. It's a mental thing and if you can't get over that then how are you supposed to get over your penis being huge, o wait...is not!! Well unless you tried physically addictive drugs like crack which was stupid to continuously do in the first place. Use your head for once and not the one that goes into your girlfriend’s mouth.
The thin line between confidence and being a complete fuckwit is actually extremely thin. Being the former you will be easily liked and fuckable while being the latter you will be even more fuckable just that every other person hates you and is spreading rumors you have a small penis. How can I be confident you may ask? Simple, walk and talk as if you know exactly what you’re saying, for god’s sake do a little research before spouting off like Japanese av actresses squirting vagina, and if there is any time you can elaborate on a point you are interested in or know a lot about in an inoffensive manner without boring the people around you. Watch the body language of the people around you as well as Thor tone of voice. Of all, the most important thing to do is to analyze the person you are talking by focusing on his most interesting topic, himself. Even if you don't give a shot about his pet puppy that died getting raped by your neighbours pit bull. It's always good to listen as knowledge is power and re power of knowledge is unfathomable. The use of such information can aid you in your social climb or your own growth as a person or lastly ammunition to destroy the bastard if he ever becomes a fag.
Being a fuckwit is even easier, do the first portion of the above but focus on no one else but yourself only giving the poor bloke a chance to talk once your done and cracked a few jokes on where he gets his hair cut. Here you are sure to attract attention as well as the weak who will follow you as pathetic little boot licking minions. However everything in moderation and you will be sure to succeed in either.
With confidence and/or arrogance you will come across people in whatever scene, group or stereotype you belong to whether it's the emo fags, shuffle sluts hiphop bitches, schooltards or enthusiasts of multiple sorts. Within these people you are darned sure to come across a girl you like or want to bang.
Although girls don't want to admit it, the plain fact is they like tossers, the kind guy always gets the back fucking seat unless he's a tosser. Being a tosser towards a girl is simple. Be detached from whatever you are doing, remain calm at all times, never show too much of your inner self and pay enough attention to her as you would your pet dog who you don't really care about. During this time it would be wise to so your research on her character, not fucking stalk her Facebook....well not just at least, and formulate a plan of action in that noggin of yours. No the flowers and telling her how pretty she looks doesn't work anymore as...she most likely already fucking knows you retard. Simply ask her out casually and multiple times till it's a yes, permanent no or she files a restraining order. Being established as the alpha male in the group is also an important step as well as being permanently representable and groomed. Yes inner beauty is important but god it's important to at least be aesthetically pleasing. Who the hell wants to go out with a retard that looks and smells like dog shit. Seriously.
Don't forget that I'd you're in this for the wham bam thank you mam then stick to the first portion above and have sweet tongue, smart assed lines with a dash of confidence play your cards right and ahaaaahhhhh.
Of course the alternative of picking these cheap sluts from the clubs would be drastically easier unless you are a complete retard with 0 social skills and an iq around room temperature.
Studying a tad bit of pick up artistry will most likely help but all you actually need are the basics in which lies confidence.A step by step idiot’s guide to how to get laid
Act smart and confident, hold a drink, use a pick up line or simply ask her to dance. Proceed to get intimate, eye contact and hell would I know how you could fuck this up. Kiss, get number you're done and offer to take her home etc. Good drink training may be required. The alpha male theory applies here as well if you get good enough; no girl is really out of your reach.
Alright I'm no expert but to hell with it, rinse and repeat till you strike. Out of so many women in the club if you can't score even one you must be quite a sad bloke.
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Iphone? The one with the GBs, and the WIFIs?
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So this wall of text is just to disguise an ad for iPhone?
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So your comment is just a disguise for your inability to read or just to be cynical?
Removed, the iphone thing :)
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shd this be in the bus forum?
so tt they can guess which bus u took? -
Bus 162 from thomson to dhoby :)
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WOT +99999 damage...
Shld this be in whinehouse?
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wall of text is useless
just ask her out
if yes = sex
if no = rape
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Your mommy wants you to be a doctor because she knows you have a small dick , ya moron.
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you all actually read eerything arh? i rad the first few sentences until i come to drugs that one i squickly log in and post this alry
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who the hell wrote tt crap?
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Originally posted by littlemissbonkers:
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who the hell wrote tt crap?
i read the first two sentences and it bored me and i stop reading... lol... -
too long; didn't read
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blehhhhh
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Originally posted by DailyFreeGames.com:
i read the first two sentences and it bored me and i stop reading... lol...
Same so I stopped at his iPhone ad -
He is contradictory you see..
First he wants to live a full, virtuous life and happy BUT simple life. Otherwise it's simply too much work.
Be happy without sacrificing his youth to attain it.
Then he confessed to being a crack head, and is lucky he is still alive today.
Then he thinks that if he can't get a pussy after leading a simple and fruitful life, he is a sad bloke.
Because he believes all you have to do is suck up his lard butt and look confident the girls are gonna come a flocking.
I say.. dream on bro.. it's not illegal.
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Originally posted by jojobeach:
He is contradictory you see..
First he wants to live a full, virtuous life and happy BUT simple life. Otherwise it's simply too much work.
Be happy without sacrificing his youth to attain it.
Then he confessed to being a crack head, and is lucky he is still alive today.
Then he thinks that if he can't get a pussy after leading a simple and fruitful life, he is a sad bloke.
Because he believes all you have to do is suck up his lard butt and look confident the girls are gonna come a flocking.
I say.. dream on bro.. it's not illegal.
Finally,
Someone with an actual reply...too bad you fit under the "iq below room temprature" group as your comments are driven by the inability to understand what has been written above
When did i mention that i want to live a SIMPLE life? My intention is to spur you sheep into leading lives for yourselves instead of other people.
Regarding your comments.
Am i not reading it the way i should? Or is it your deplorable command of the english language...because all of it points to you being too stupid or you completely failing to use the right words.
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Originally posted by Dantelucia:
Finally,
Someone with an actual reply...too bad you fit under the "iq below room temprature" group as your comments are driven by the inability to understand what has been written above
When did i mention that i want to live a SIMPLE life? My intention is to spur you sheep into leading lives for yourselves instead of other people.
Regarding your comments.
Am i not reading it the way i should? Or is it your deplorable command of the english language...because all of it points to you being too stupid or you completely failing to use the right words.
There there boy, no need to get yer panties all bunched up aye.
Too bad ye can't come up with an intelligent counter, so ya have to resort to insulting.. tsk tsk..
Right words, wrong words, all subjective eh.
Ye wanna live in yer own little fantasy, it ain't illegal and I ain't gonna stop ye. I'm not that cruel you see.
Now run along hussy, life ain't as simple as you wish boy.
One day when you grow up, ye will understand what I mean.
What I put here is not me stupid, is because I know betta. OK ? Good.
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My dear sir,
Going on the basis of your initial post which was filled with sarcasm and no clear sign that you actually understood anything, i was simply stating facts, not resorting to childish modifications of the passage :)
Also, i do respect other peoples opinions, however what makes you so credible?All you say is that you know better. The fact is many people have much more experience in life than i do, i'll admit, but i don't agree that life has to be as arduos as you say.
I am a person that believes that life can be simple and happy according to the way you live it. We as singaporeans are spoilt and complain about many things, when there aren't actually that many to complain about.
Tell me my good sir, which part of what i wrote is a fantasy?And how can using the wrong words make your statement subjective? Your logic is flawed
P.S this passage was supposed to be satire and taken with a pinch of salt
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i are sikaporean got lots of complain. i complain now so many foreigner traps here and they really don;t know no skill. next time i vote i will draw one tortise on the ticket. so plaese make my area a wlakover to say my time queuein up. its not buying hello kitty or iphone6 you know. that one queue never mind.
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Originally posted by troublemaker2005:
i are sikaporean got lots of complain. i complain now so many foreigner traps here and they really don;t know no skill. next time i vote i will draw one tortise on the ticket. so plaese make my area a wlakover to say my time queuein up. its not buying hello kitty or iphone6 you know. that one queue never mind.
lol, ur post is more interesting. such irony. -
Dear TS,
Please STFU.
Go inhale more crack and spare us your pseudo philosophy crap.
And since nobody here likes you, I hereby conclude that you're a fuckwit.
Now go suck some balls.
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TS very funny, post a long thread (I did not read), others reply, TS gonna argue with others and then goes on and on and on.
So, why post the thread? For the sake of arguing with other forumers?
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Well i would lock this topic if i knew how. Just because people don't like me doesn't make me a fuckwit. The way i see it, im talking to a bunch of uneducated sods who took a satirical piece of writing too seriously and/or couldn't be bothered to read it/couldn't understand it.
Hurling insults at me isn't going to make your life any better and neither is my life going to be made any worse :)
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+1 for effort. n �好笑