I am feeling guilty
-
I am a 1st year accountancy student over at a local university.
I have realised that my peers are all pretty good in their work. I don't think it is going to be easy to excel among my peers...
I am feeling guilty as I feel that by not being able to do well and get a good degree, I have actually let my parents down. My parents are not rich or highly educated. They they are in their 50s and they they don't earn much and I actually hope that I can provide them with a better life after I have graduated... I am very worried that I will not be able to fulfill this responsibilty.. I feel guilty when I see that they have to work for long hours for little pay..
I am hoping to graduate as soon as possible so that I can improve their standard of living. I understand that my mum will not be working anymore once I have graduated...
I am thinking of joining the civil service for I think it offers a better pay package as compared to private sector.. I am afraid that by not doing well, they might not be willing to hire me..
Haiz.. I am really quite upset now.. I don't know who to share my problem with so I decided to post here.. Any advices are welcomed.
Thanks.
-
u is wrg le.
only if u is a scholar den u can get a high pay as a civil servant.
-
You need good transcripts if you want to apply for a civil servant post. Just go to any stat board's career section webpage, download the job application form and you'll get what I mean. They want you to list all your exam results all the way down to your o levels.
Yeah, it sucks, but some scholar came up with that standard form template and every stat board in singapore stuck with it.
-
Originally posted by Dejected soul:
I am a 1st year accountancy student over at a local university.
I have realised that my peers are all pretty good in their work. I don't think it is going to be easy to excel among my peers...
I am feeling guilty as I feel that by not being able to do well and get a good degree, I have actually let my parents down. My parents are not rich or highly educated. They they are in their 50s and they they don't earn much and I actually hope that I can provide them with a better life after I have graduated... I am very worried that I will not be able to fulfill this responsibilty.. I feel guilty when I see that they have to work for long hours for little pay..
I am hoping to graduate as soon as possible so that I can improve their standard of living. I understand that my mum will not be working anymore once I have graduated...
I am thinking of joining the civil service for I think it offers a better pay package as compared to private sector.. I am afraid that by not doing well, they might not be willing to hire me..
Haiz.. I am really quite upset now.. I don't know who to share my problem with so I decided to post here.. Any advices are welcomed.
Thanks.
First, you r thinking way too much and putting too much stress on yr shoulders... right now, you can only do the right thing which is to put 100% focus on yr studies... making yrself stress over such stuff will not get you a good grade also... I am studying in NTU and i just failed my test... great ar? song bo? u know why? cos i keep on worrying about if i can score well even before the test...
Second, stop comparing yrself with yr peers... i know said is easier than done... i also compare... the importance is you can set them as a benchmark but you should not feel inferior... have some confidence...
Third, regarding jobs in civil sector, i have been thinking lately... no point thinking about that right now... it is just too far ahead... you still have some years to go ahead... of cos you can start to look for jobs that you might be interested... but nevertheless, you shld focus on yr "current job" which is study... However, dun ask me about the salary as i will not know anything about that...
Cheer up, I believe exams are coming soon right? just do yr best and be positive...
-
Why dont you (ts) take this worry as a challenge?
Take your classmates as a movtivating tools to push you further and higher and archieve your aims and ambitions.
Take one step at a time.
Finish you studies first before looking for jobs.
-
Originally posted by Dejected soul:
I am a 1st year accountancy student over at a local university.
I have realised that my peers are all pretty good in their work. I don't think it is going to be easy to excel among my peers...
I am feeling guilty as I feel that by not being able to do well and get a good degree, I have actually let my parents down. My parents are not rich or highly educated. They they are in their 50s and they they don't earn much and I actually hope that I can provide them with a better life after I have graduated... I am very worried that I will not be able to fulfill this responsibilty.. I feel guilty when I see that they have to work for long hours for little pay..
I am hoping to graduate as soon as possible so that I can improve their standard of living. I understand that my mum will not be working anymore once I have graduated...
I am thinking of joining the civil service for I think it offers a better pay package as compared to private sector.. I am afraid that by not doing well, they might not be willing to hire me..
Haiz.. I am really quite upset now.. I don't know who to share my problem with so I decided to post here.. Any advices are welcomed.
Thanks.
To be truthful to you, everyone wants to be 1st class, but few will hit even 2nd upper, much less 1st class. Those who hit 1st class are usually either those who study till the point where studying is like their life, or they are natural-born geniuses.
If you really want to do extremely well, then you will have to start to love your prescribed texts and notes as if they are your wife.
There are a few 1st class here in this forum, such as eagle and myself, so you can find out who they are and pm them on what strategy they use to study. Note that each of us will certainly use different strategies, so you can try and find out which strategy suit you best.
I am not sure if you have any essay modules, but for these modules, the most important thing is to always find out what your tutor wants. Different tutors have different expectations, and I find it out the hard way. Once you grab hold of what they want, even if your essay is written a week before the deadline, getting something around A- should not be a problem.
For Maths modules, it is all about practice. Whatever you have in your tutorials, notes, and prescribed texts, practice them all. Practice not just the questions, but also the deriving of formulas, the proving of theorems, so on and so for. A lot of people complain that uni Maths is different from JC Maths, and that is true. In JC, one is expected to solve problems more than anything else, whereas in uni, you are expected to show your depth of knowledge in addition to solving problems. I have to admit there are things which I vomit out in exams that I actually understood only sometime after.
For project modules, always grab the best group members. If you got any slacker who will not contribute to the group, just ignore him/her and continue on with the project. If you got a lousy group, do not hesitate to put everything on your shoulders. It will be quite overwhelming for 1 to do the work of 4~6, but there is a price to getting an A.
For practical modules, find out what your boss wants to see. Don't just show him/her what you are capable of, for what you can do may not be what he/she wanted. This may sound bad, but also try to suck up to him/her. Don't oversuck though, or it may backfire against you.
Don't worry too much, I was from YJC, a neighbourhood JC, and I have managed to top over people from VJC and HCI. It is all about hardwork, effort and self-belief of the right kind - it is not going to help much if you study in the wrong direction or you always think that you will lose out to others.
It is never easy to fight with the others, especially when many of the foreign students are willing to literally sell their souls to studying. However, NEVER UNDERESTIMATE yourself and never allow yourself to be pull down by any obstacles which you face. A bad grade in a single module does not mean that you will not do well for the other modules.
-
Originally posted by Dejected soul:
I am a 1st year accountancy student over at a local university.
I have realised that my peers are all pretty good in their work. I don't think it is going to be easy to excel among my peers...
I am feeling guilty as I feel that by not being able to do well and get a good degree, I have actually let my parents down. My parents are not rich or highly educated. They they are in their 50s and they they don't earn much and I actually hope that I can provide them with a better life after I have graduated... I am very worried that I will not be able to fulfill this responsibilty.. I feel guilty when I see that they have to work for long hours for little pay..
I am hoping to graduate as soon as possible so that I can improve their standard of living. I understand that my mum will not be working anymore once I have graduated...
I am thinking of joining the civil service for I think it offers a better pay package as compared to private sector.. I am afraid that by not doing well, they might not be willing to hire me..
Haiz.. I am really quite upset now.. I don't know who to share my problem with so I decided to post here.. Any advices are welcomed.
Thanks.
Is having a well paid job that gives you more money to give your parents the only way you can treat them well? There are many families where the children are giving their parents lots of money and nothing else (ie. no affection whatsoever). Of course, if those parents are only happy with money, then they deserve each other.
You seem to care much for your parents. I'm sure your parents should be somehow happy that they have brought up a good child, right? The amount of money you can afford to give them should not be their way of gauging your worth as a child. Neither should your amount of wealth or income be your way of judging your own worth.
There are many families which are not well-off, surviving on little money, yet leading very happy lives. If the family has more money to enjoy more stuff in life, that is a bonus to enjoy.
Rainbow Jigsaw of Life
-
When you are really poor, you only want food and clothing to eat and keep warm.Saint Paul was also poor. he had only food and clothing yet he is satisfied.Think about it.
-
Originally posted by Dejected soul:
I am a 1st year accountancy student over at a local university.
I have realised that my peers are all pretty good in their work. I don't think it is going to be easy to excel among my peers...
I am feeling guilty as I feel that by not being able to do well and get a good degree, I have actually let my parents down. My parents are not rich or highly educated. They they are in their 50s and they they don't earn much and I actually hope that I can provide them with a better life after I have graduated... I am very worried that I will not be able to fulfill this responsibilty.. I feel guilty when I see that they have to work for long hours for little pay..
I am hoping to graduate as soon as possible so that I can improve their standard of living. I understand that my mum will not be working anymore once I have graduated...
I am thinking of joining the civil service for I think it offers a better pay package as compared to private sector.. I am afraid that by not doing well, they might not be willing to hire me..
Haiz.. I am really quite upset now.. I don't know who to share my problem with so I decided to post here.. Any advices are welcomed.
Thanks.
IF you are really feeling guilty, then you must postpone your University studies and start working as soon as you can to help your parents financially.You can always continue your studies next time when your family is financially stable.
Unless you're really just a selfish person who come here to seek for a consolation advice to make yourself feel better while you are increasing the burden on your family, then in that case I cannot help you because I HATE selfish people.
Alot of Singaporeans are selfish individuals, but that doesn't means that they are doing the right things.
Many wrongs are still not equal to one right.
-
Ts, I dont think it is more of a guilty sense you are having.
It's more to the responsbility you shower towards your parents.
Work hard, get your degree and no worry, you will earn a decent salary.
-
Originally posted by ditzy:
You need good transcripts if you want to apply for a civil servant post. Just go to any stat board's career section webpage, download the job application form and you'll get what I mean. They want you to list all your exam results all the way down to your o levels.
Yeah, it sucks, but some scholar came up with that standard form template and every stat board in singapore stuck with it.
They do not neccessarily go for top scorers only. I worked in the Stat board for over a year before going on to further my studies, and though my score sucked like hell ( I da bao alot of modules in poly), I still got the job even though there were more experienced and better candidates than me.
They usually go for all rounders or people with potential.
-
As for now, i suggest you put 101% concentration on yr studies first. Just do yr best. Dont worry abt all these things first. Take one step at a time. Since you already know that yr studies arent that good, then what should you do now? Buck up. Put in more effort than the rest. As long as you have the will, i'm sure you can do it. If you are letting these thoughts to affect yr studies, i'm sure you'll regret it later on in life.
.After you graduated with a good degree, then you'll can slowly think abt what jobs you want in the future. By then, with yr qualification, you will be able to provide well for yr parents. With a good degree, yr pay wont be that pathetic. Also, i'm sure yr parents want you to focus on yr studies currently. Think, why are they working so hard now? That is because they want to fulfill the duty as parents to put you through university. Remember, yr only job now is to study hard...only that way, you'll not let yr parents down. (Just make sure you really tried yr very best in whateva you do.) Next time you can have plenty of opportunities to slowly repay them.
-
TS's parents are struggling, how can you all encourage TS to be selfish and allowed his parents to bear the heavy financial burden?
What if TS's parents fainted or died while TS is halfway in his course?
I don't know what he can do except to become an actor for porn movies.
-
Originally posted by Honeygreentea:
As for now, i suggest you put 101% concentration on yr studies first. Just do yr best. Dont worry abt all these things first. Take one step at a time. If you are letting these thoughts to affect yr studies, i'm sure you'll regret it later on in life.
.After you graduated with a good degree, then you'll can slowly think abt what jobs you want in the future. By then, with yr qualification, you will be able to provide well for yr parents. With a good degree, yr pay wont be that pathetic. Also, i'm sure yr parents want you to focus on yr studies currently. Think, why are they working so hard now? That is because they want to fulfill the duty as parents to put you through university. Remember, yr only job now is to study hard...only that way, you'll not let yr parents down. (Just make sure you really tried yr very best in whateva you do.) Next time you can have plenty of opportunities to slowly repay them.
http://www.sgforums.com/forums/3545/topics/399974?page=69
-
Originally posted by Quinsy:
They do not neccessarily go for top scorers only. I worked in the Stat board for over a year before going on to further my studies, and though my score sucked like hell ( I da bao alot of modules in poly), I still got the job even though there were more experienced and better candidates than me.
They usually go for all rounders or people with potential.
of coz.they still need rank & file staff.
-
Hi dejected soul,
U r only in 1st yr so there is plenty of time to catch up and do yr best in yr studies. Don't worry abt the job first, u have a few more yrs of studies to go, focus on yr studies first.
The key question is what do u want to achieve? If u put yr mind to being good in yr studies and then find a good job u can do it. Do you believe in yrself? You can only achieve what u think u can, if u think u can't u already limit yrself. Have u heard abt Adam Khoo and how he transformed from a lousy student to gifted student and became a millionarie? It all started by changing yr thoughts and mindset about yourself. If u know where to look, u can adopt and learn to do the same thing for yrself and achieve success in yr life too.
If u really want to do something to change yr life for the better u can visit my blog below for some useful resources and articles for inspiration, motivation and inspiration. There are also links and resources that will point u to the key to how ppl like Adam Khoo achieve success. It is really all in our minds and how we can learn to change our thoughts to adopt positive empowering thoughts and rid of negative and limiting thoughts and beliefs. But that is provided u r clear what u want in life, are willing, prepared to change and want to change.
-
Dont give up ts.
U are still young.
When there is a will, there is a way.
End of the tunnel , there is a light.
-
Originally posted by Dejected soul:
I am a 1st year accountancy student over at a local university.
I have realised that my peers are all pretty good in their work. I don't think it is going to be easy to excel among my peers...
I am feeling guilty as I feel that by not being able to do well and get a good degree, I have actually let my parents down. My parents are not rich or highly educated. They they are in their 50s and they they don't earn much and I actually hope that I can provide them with a better life after I have graduated... I am very worried that I will not be able to fulfill this responsibilty.. I feel guilty when I see that they have to work for long hours for little pay..
I am hoping to graduate as soon as possible so that I can improve their standard of living. I understand that my mum will not be working anymore once I have graduated...
I am thinking of joining the civil service for I think it offers a better pay package as compared to private sector.. I am afraid that by not doing well, they might not be willing to hire me..
Haiz.. I am really quite upset now.. I don't know who to share my problem with so I decided to post here.. Any advices are welcomed.
Thanks.
You don't have to feel guilty. Seriously
Firstly, you didn't do anything wrong.
And secondly, i'm sure that you're parents would be really glad if they saw this and knew of the fact that you always have them on your minds.
Well, Accountancy has always been a very tough and competitive course. And it's only natural to feel the pressure especially when your peers are doing so well.
How well you're doing in school may not totally translate to your workplace. So even if you're not doing well in school currently, do not fret. Having good grades in school doesn't really mean that you'll do well in your workplace.
A degree is only a stepping stone for you when you enter the workforce. There are many other factors that constitute to success. Firms do not only take the degree of job applicants into account when hiring them. Their are other factors that they look out for. Youre potential, your self confidence, the way you present and carry yourself and your previous experiences.
You don't really have to feel depressed okays?
Just continue working hard and i'm sure you'll be justly rewarded. One point to take ote though, do not fully immersed yourself in your school work all the time.
Studying in a university is far more than that.
Take part in different kind of activites. They'll enrich you, broaden your view and would only serve to benefit you in the future.
And make lots of friends.
It's a fine balancing act but i'm sure that you'll be able to do it
-
Keep wasting your parents money and increase their financial burdens with your selfish spendings.
A sensible child would go out to work to reduce the financial stress from their family.
Don't take your parents for granted, they won't be there for you forever and you should be sensible enough NOT TO USE THEIR HARD-EARNED MONEY FOR YOUR SELFISH GAINS.
Why it is called selfish gains? It's because you have never thought of returning them back the money and it will be difficult for you to even save up the same amount of money and repay it back to them.
YOU WOULD TAKE ALL THEIR MONEY AWAY AND YOU ARE TRYING TO FEEL LESS GUILTY ABOUT DOING SO.
PLEASE TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO YOUR PARENTS!
YOU SHOULD BE DOING SOMETHING FOR THEM, NOT TO THEM!!
-
Aiyah, TS, why are you sad over simple things? You have life's simple pleasures such as as a lovely family, good health, a roof over your head, enough food to live, and you agonize over what you do not have. Happiness is about looking at the stars you have in your life and not merely focusing on the darkness. To put into simple terms, a millionaire will never be happy when he keeps complaining why he still not a billionaire despite working so hard... Yet, I've seen people who have no money find happiness nonetheless. I am one of them lah, back when I have bank debts of like 20k (not to mention I got cheated by many years friendship of around 20k, totalled 40k), I still manage to find happiness despite a very dim picture of my future. Even worse when I had to leave home because my parents care more about money, so they rented out my room. Me being me, I won't stand in anyone's way of making money if they think I am blocking their way, but seriously, how fast things changed is beyond logical explanation. From no money homeless situation until now, within a short period of 2 years, I can never ever imagine how luck changes, no more money problems, future super bright and I'm thanking God almost every moment of my life. I think paper qualifications doesn't always signify success, in the sense that, I do graduate with an MBA but until now, I never use it. And yet you may sometimes comes across MBA or PhD students who have an arrogant elitist attitude who spit upon others, in such, I have to say, indeed paper qualifications doesn't matter as much as your character do. You come into society to work, you meet people, you work with them, it's a people society as much as a paper qualifications society.
-
Originally posted by parn:
TS's parents are struggling, how can you all encourage TS to be selfish and allowed his parents to bear the heavy financial burden?
What if TS's parents fainted or died while TS is halfway in his course?
I don't know what he can do except to become an actor for porn movies.
Siao lah you!Being content with food and clothing will ease some burdens.Now America a lot of people are jobless,how to find a job!?
-
Originally posted by Hello Kitty:
of coz.they still need rank & file staff.
My job wasn't rank and file.
-
Originally posted by Quinsy:
My job wasn't rank and file.
Nobody gives a fark.
-
Originally posted by pavarotti:
Siao lah you!Being content with food and clothing will ease some burdens.Now America a lot of people are jobless,how to find a job!?
1 Post? LOL!!! You need to have courage to log on your main account to reply my post.Lost your balls? Go and implant them back ok?
-
talking about balls, hmmm...kind of miss my favorite fishball meepok...