Hurdle in Developing Relationship

m.c.king

18 Dec 00, 21:49

I refer to the posting "Is this Love?" http://www.sgforums.com/ubb/Forum39/HTML/000151.html

The good news is that after I said I missed her, she actually paged for me and we've had about 4 chat session on the phone and sometimes she pages me 3-4 times a day. She has also invited me out for a talk organised by her.

The bad news is: she got a boyfriend now. What's the most appropriate thing to do now?
* Tell her I like her?
* Hide my feeling for her and be her casual friend?
* Stop all contact as I probably don't stand a chance at all.

Pls advise.

[This message has been edited by m.c.king (edited 20 December 2000).]

[This message has been edited by m.c.king (edited 20 December 2000).]

yolanda_tan

18 Dec 00, 22:27

Hide ur feelings from her for the time being. Once she's single, swoop in for the attack. Tell her ur true feelings only when's she single.

m.c.king

20 Dec 00, 11:40

The night after the talk by her, I walked her home and she told me that she has patched up with her boyfriend (she told me they were having a tiff 2 days ago) and from that moment on, I knew she and her boyfriend are very much in love with each other.

I'm feeling very depressed and sad right now because my heart and my head are pulling me apart. My heart is saying: you must seize the opportunity to at least let her know you like her or you risk losing her forever. On the other side, my head is telling me: she and her boyfriend are very happy together and I should suppress my feeling and look for another girl because nothing is going to come out of it.

Confusion and disappointment nows fills my heart. After she has reached home, I left for a park near her house and did a lot of thinking. Somehow, she still feels very precious to me; I've never had such feeling for a girl throughout 21 years of my life and I felt totally devastated if I've to give her up -- I'm afraid of losing her. Will I meet another girl who will touch my heart ever in my life again? It's simply hard to just suppress my feeling for her even though my head is telling me to stop it.

I'm contemplating telling everything, by
(1) letting her know I like her,
(2) but I also understand that she has a great loving relationship with her boyfriend (3) and I'm not asking for any more advances in our relationship and I'm just hoping to remain as casual friend.

Any comments?

m.c.king

22 Dec 00, 18:25

Yesterday, she called me during lunch time and said I'm the first guy to walk her home to her doorstep and not even her boyfriend ever did that. Then she said she felt closer to me than her boyfriend and that we can communicate better. She said each time she talk to her boyfriend, they've nothing to say to each other.

I'm now confused again. What does she want in the end? Is she implying anything? Or am I over=sensitive?

Crysania

22 Dec 00, 22:10

Originally posted by m.c.king:
Yesterday, she called me during lunch time and said I'm the first guy to walk her home to her doorstep and not even her boyfriend ever did that. Then she said she felt closer to me than her boyfriend and that we can communicate better. She said each time she talk to her boyfriend, they've nothing to say to each other.

I'm now confused again. What does she want in the end? Is she implying anything? Or am I over=sensitive?

She is having a hard time at her relationship remember? Whenever a problem occurs, girls will think of other alternatives, one that is finding a better person.
She may just be searching for another port to rest her heart, yet it may just be a temporarily park. Give her time to sort her feelings out. U won't want to have her now but only to lose her later when she is more aware of her feelings.
If she have feelings for you, it won't dimish so easily. If it does, it isn't stable in the first place.
Remember that loving someone does not mean possessing her, but to wish her happiness.

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**I want u to be with me.....
be with me in the morning...be with me in the nite...with me when its dark out...with me when its light...
I want u to be with me...no matter what we do...just keep this reminder...of how much I love u...**

Ferret

23 Dec 00, 16:57

Originally posted by Crysania:
She is having a hard time at her relationship remember? Whenever a problem occurs, girls will think of other alternatives, one that is finding a better person.
She may just be searching for another port to rest her heart, yet it may just be a temporarily park. Give her time to sort her feelings out. U won't want to have her now but only to lose her later when she is more aware of her feelings.
If she have feelings for you, it won't dimish so easily. If it does, it isn't stable in the first place.
Remember that loving someone does not mean possessing her, but to wish her happiness.

How true.

Bear

24 Dec 00, 18:12

On top of that, I think she has just got her bf, so things will not be so smooth sailing for her. but the sad thing is that the passion will be there.

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Barely Bearing Berry Belly Bear