Hi all,
I've just got married at the ROM for abt 2mths. I've known my hubby for 3yrs+ before we got married.
During the initial stages of our relationship, he told me about his ex-gf to which I had absolutely no problems about until he began talking everything good and nice about her. From her being matured to how well-loved she was by his parents and etc. BTW, she's very rich as she's the only child. Until she left him for someone my hubby also knew. They were together for abouth 2.5 yrs.
Then she found him on IRC and started chatting with him. He didn't tell him that he was attached, letting her think that he wanted her back. And she's studying in the Australia. By now, we were about 3 mths into the relationship. He admitted to me that he had problems deciding between the 2 of us. I told him that he's free to go back to her 'cos I never liked fighting over a guy as it just degrades a woman. He said he choose me and I suspected the distance to be one of the reasons why he stayed. I also think that it's 'cos she has not intention of going back to him.
Initially, we got heated arguments over the same topic for so many times that I've lost count. Until last year when I could take it no longer, I issued an ultimatum, stating the consequences of his recurring mistake. He promised that it'd never happened again. He even msged that girl over ICQ telling her he'd stop all contacts with her.
Last week, I found out that they started contacting again. He denied when I asked him. Later on, he admitted. And I repeated my exact words last year about the consequences. As we're now married, both our parents got to know about it and suggested me to give him a chance. To be frank, I've already given up on him by now.
I'm in a dilemma now. Even before this problem cropped up, I've had someone, A, interested in me though he never made it known to me. And he's starting to make some move now that I'm having a problem (A do not know that I'm married or having problems with my hubby). The 2nd problem is, I've been attending classes for a while and for every different subject, we'll have different lecturer. This lecturer, B, knows that I'm attached and that I'm having problems with my hubby. My hubby and I attend lessons together, though he do not know that we're married. He got my numbers and starting to tell me that he wanted to know me better.
B is a very interesting man and I've found out that we've common interest and hobbies. He's also very charismatic though he's not a good-looker. I found myself thinking of him ever since he made his intention known. (He wasn't taking advantage of the situation my hubby and I are in now as he kept telling me to forgive my "bf no matter what he did wrong" and he do not know what are the problems we're having) On the other hand, my hubby is more passive, prefering to play computer games and such during his free time and we don't have much in common.
Personally, I know it myself that I won't be able to forgive my hubby and trust in him again but he's been clinging on to me and even committing suicide... On the other hand, I suspect that B is the kind who does not want to be tied down 'cos he said he wasn't looking for a GF but only a companion 'cos he's working towards his goal for now 1st.
Anyone can suggest what I should do?
PS. Sorry about the long msg ...

[This message has been edited by Shanny (edited 25 November 2000).]