older sister borrowed money never repay
-
Originally posted by MasterMoogle:
You say you give her idea, but did you advice her how to get back 8k yourself?
I no advice her on that, since it is clear without evidence that money cannot be gotten back. Since I cannot give her advice on that, I might as well shut up on that.
You keep asking her to forgive, but did you advice her how to get money to help her dad?
I told her that she can ask her mom try using cpf, seek mp help.
The only one calling me smartass here in this thread is you, and there are plentiful of forummers like jojo jie and destiny here who are telling you the absurdness of your hot air ideas.
It seems like you are the only one who can't see what a smartass you are yourself.
They say absurb but they never propose to beat people up and see whether forgive onot. SO that makes u the smartass...Smartass.
Ur smartass ideas will neva materialise. The hospital wants the money now. You think CPF can kick in the money immediately? Use some common sense. Somebody got to give some money upfront first.
Yes you r right about one thing...you should SHUT UP.
She oledi set her mind not to help so paying for the bills is not the issue. Halo? Wake up and read read properly. Can onot? U blind or wat?
What advice to give but to keep on chasing money from the sister la. Common sense.
U and ur hot air ideas, did you advice how to get back the 8k. Neva. Looks like all the hotair got cramp up your head until you missed this wan out.
U r so bad wif finances no wonder yer family is bankrupt.
-
Originally posted by MasterMoogle:
You say you give her idea, but did you advice her how to get back 8k yourself?
I no advice her on that, since it is clear without evidence that money cannot be gotten back. Since I cannot give her advice on that, I might as well shut up on that.
You keep asking her to forgive, but did you advice her how to get money to help her dad?
I told her that she can ask her mom try using cpf, seek mp help.
The only one calling me smartass here in this thread is you, and there are plentiful of forummers like jojo jie and destiny here who are telling you the absurdness of your hot air ideas.
It seems like you are the only one who can't see what a smartass you are yourself.
Forgiveness is irrelevant or premature here. Things are complicated once it involves money. Does not mean forgive the money problem will go away.
-
Originally posted by jojobeach:
Your idea is a shitty idea ok.
Forgiveness.. LOL... can you teach us how to pull that out of your ass ?
My very forgiving advise to you .. GROW UP LAH.
Not as shit as urs or hitman.
It is the best idea in the world.
Nope, I pulled that out from yer ass. The one you conceited wif the ridiculous mastermoogle.
Yes, that is teh advice u shld give yerself. GROW UP beach (that is yer name rite). Also, please GROW LESS ass because your ass is too big. Too many rubbish coming out from there.
U sound like somebody who share the same experiences. Maybe u were abused, no wonder so much bitterness.
-
Originally posted by Cassey1215:
They say absurb but they never propose to beat people up and see whether forgive onot. SO that makes u the smartass...Smartass.
Ur smartass ideas will neva materialise. The hospital wants the money now. You think CPF can kick in the money immediately? Use some common sense. Somebody got to give some money upfront first.
Yes you r right about one thing...you should SHUT UP.
She oledi set her mind not to help so paying for the bills is not the issue. Halo? Wake up and read read properly. Can onot? U blind or wat?
What advice to give but to keep on chasing money from the sister la. Common sense.
U and ur hot air ideas, did you advice how to get back the 8k. Neva. Looks like all the hotair got cramp up your head until you missed this wan out.
U r so bad wif finances no wonder yer family is bankrupt.
Me say beat people up is because that is what TS dad did to her. Can you go through the same thing yourself and say "I forgive you dad?"
**** you okay, my family bankrupt not your problem. I never scold your family, you come **** mine. I just study hard and support my family when I come out to work in the future can ler. Just to let others see what kind of person you are, I am not going to scold back your family or anyone else - I am not going to scold your family here no matter what you say about mine.
You no read guidelines? As long CPF got enough $$, hospital like SGH can allow you to stay first without paying deposit upfront, just that you can only stay in B2/C wards. I in sec 4 nia I know even more than you do.
You say she makes up her mind already, than you talk about forgiveness so much for what? Come back only hit yourself in the face. If you want her forgive, of course you will want her to help out, even if only a little bit. Don't tell me she can truly forgive and not help out at all (not even talking to her dad, not even bringing the granchildren to see the grandpa in the hospital). Back to you on your common sense.
Once again you are saying my ideas are stupid and not giving any idea besides your almighty FORGIVE. Oh, you add in one more idea: to chase the sister for money. Lets look in front on the first 2 pages: Ah! But you forget they are broke in the first place and that is why they cannot squeeze money out.
Anyway, I succeeded in doing what I set out to do: To show that you are a hypocrite who cannot forgive those who argue with you, and have to stoop as low as attacking their families.
Not posting here anymore, time for my dinner (I no go for lunch cause need to go help train my juniors in their CCA despite the fact I graduate liao), and leaving these here for everyone to see.
Just pray hard that everyone who pass by here has as much forgiveness as you talk about.
-
Originally posted by winsomeea:
Forgiveness is irrelevant or premature here. Things are complicated once it involves money. Does not mean forgive the money problem will go away.
Agree with you.
Can't see why someone is pushing so hard for forgiveness.
Anyway this one is really my last post, no more one last post again.
-
Originally posted by MasterMoogle:
Agree with you.
Can't see why someone is pushing so hard for forgiveness.
Anyway this one is really my last post, no more one last post again.
I have been through problems and took advice from people who told me to forgive. After forgiveness the problem still remains.
Life is complicated it is not always 1 + 1 = 2
-
Originally posted by MasterMoogle:
Me say beat people up is because that is what TS dad did to her. Can you go through the same thing yourself and say "I forgive you dad?"
**** you okay, my family bankrupt not your problem. I never scold your family, you come **** mine. I just study hard and support my family when I come out to work in the future can ler. Just to let others see what kind of person you are, I am not going to scold back your family or anyone else - I am not going to scold your family here no matter what you say about mine.
You no read guidelines? As long CPF got enough $$, hospital like SGH can allow you to stay first without paying deposit upfront, just that you can only stay in B2/C wards. I in sec 4 nia I know even more than you do.
You say she makes up her mind already, than you talk about forgiveness so much for what? Come back only hit yourself in the face. If you want her forgive, of course you will want her to help out, even if only a little bit. Don't tell me she can truly forgive and not help out at all (not even talking to her dad, not even bringing the granchildren to see the grandpa in the hospital). Back to you on your common sense.
Once again you are saying my ideas are stupid and not giving any idea besides your almighty FORGIVE. Oh, you add in one more idea: to chase the sister for money. Lets look in front on the first 2 pages: Ah! But you forget they are broke in the first place and that is why they cannot squeeze money out.
Anyway, I succeeded in doing what I set out to do: To show that you are a hypocrite who cannot forgive those who argue with you, and have to stoop as low as attacking their families.
Not posting here anymore, time for my dinner (I no go for lunch cause need to go help train my juniors in their CCA despite the fact I graduate liao), and leaving these here for everyone to see.
Just pray hard that everyone who pass by here has as much forgiveness as you talk about.
-
why dun you ask her for the money in family gatherings or better still, CNY gatherings in front of your relatives, ask her when she is going to pay you back as you are broke, then see how she respond to it there and then.
-
Originally posted by MasterMoogle:
Anyway, I succeeded in doing what I set out to do: To show that you are a hypocrite who cannot forgive those who argue with you, and have to stoop as low as attacking their families.
EPIC.
-
Some of you write grandmother stories and then take life so seriously......while I sit here and watch bemused. Hahahaha :)
-
If she knows the time I'll be at gatherings, she will avoid coming at that time. CNY is the same. I think she get info from my mother what time I am there things like that. Even my own mother defends my sis, sad...I observe that my mother doesn't tell my bro and older sis off for wrong things they do but me and younger sis are at receiving end.
-
To Casey1215: I did visit my father once with my hubby n kids even though my dad used to treat them as transparent. But forgiveness wasn't on my mind when I saw him after such a long period of time. I am just numb when it comes to my dad. I am more focused on the medical bills cos' forgiving really cannot solve the $ problem. It is not a priority for me. I find peace and freedom when I am with my kids, hubby and some genuine friends who care abt me. It's like living in another world, a wonderful one.
To MasterMoogle even though u r not going to post here again but in case u read this, I did suggest to my mother abt using my CPF but after discharge, dad needs to go for follow up consultations, medication etc and she said these need to be paid in cash. Abt seeing MP, perhaps.Thanks for your idea.
-
LOL... MasterMoogle pwn Cassey1215... see, it's not so easy to forgive because it never happened on you... once it did, small thing online you also curse and swear at other strangers... not to mention if it's your family member... but now you understand, it's easy to say forgive but when happen to you, then it's different ler...
-
Originally posted by DailyFreeGames.com:
LOL... MasterMoogle pwn Cassey1215... see, it's not so easy to forgive because it never happened on you... once it did, small thing online you also curse and swear at other strangers... not to mention if it's your family member... but now you understand, it's easy to say forgive but when happen to you, then it's different ler...
-
u just open out the problem to everyone during gathering. this will make her embarrass and she confirm will return u the money after that. she wan face so she will return
-
It seems your mother is targeting you for money.
What about your brother ? Is he contributing at all ?
Since you are not working, it is quite strange your mother keeps bothering you with money.
Is it because your husband is well to do ? Is your mother going after your husband's money ? Has she directly asked money from your husband before ?
Does your mother knows about that 8K you loaned to your older sis ?
-
Originally posted by Cassey1215:
Not as shit as urs or hitman.
It is the best idea in the world.
Nope, I pulled that out from yer ass. The one you conceited wif the ridiculous mastermoogle.
Yes, that is teh advice u shld give yerself. GROW UP beach (that is yer name rite). Also, please GROW LESS ass because your ass is too big. Too many rubbish coming out from there.
U sound like somebody who share the same experiences. Maybe u were abused, no wonder so much bitterness.
My guess is you are one of them Xiao Di Di with not a whole lot of experience in life to spout so much naivity.
My guess is that you are also one of those who leach off richer family members yet is able to justify every cent you take from them, yes ?
No I was not abused. But I have plenty of "relatives" who stick their hands out at me demanding I be generous with them, simply because I live in a nicer house with a bigger backyard.
They invite me to their party so that I may pay their bills. When I invite them on a trip, they assume I am paying for their flight tickets and travelling expenses. Perhaps it's better to be poor ( relatively speaking)
Anyway, given your immaturity and "poor" thinking , I doubt you will ever understand how that's like to be constantly taken advantage of.
-
Hi jojo beach, yes it seems my mother is targeting my hubby cos' my hubby earns more than my brother. My younger sis is also targetted cos' she is married but no kids and she's working. My older sis no need to contribute cos' my mother always says she 's broke. I have been a stay at home mom since my firstborn and throughtout the years, every wedding,funeral of distant relatives, I am asked to pay more. She will use the same speech,' you all pay more cos' u all can afford it" My brother and me are not on good terms as expected after years of abuse. I dunno if he contributes and the amount he pays. But younger sis and me have to pay same amount even though our domestic situation is different.
-
My hubby is not rich but he works hard for his money. He is thrifty not stingy. When we were dating he would buy me gifts and if older sis happen to know abt it, she will ask the price. If she thinks it's expensive, she will tell everyone my hubby must be rich etc. Sometimes going on a trip to nearby countries are also seem as very rich. To the extent when I receive wedding & birthday gifts from hubby, I feel guilty for having it. See the effect it can have on you. Nowadays, I even ask hubby don't buy presents for all these special ocassions, if buy buy for our kids. My mother knows the 8k I loaned to older sis. Everyone knows but nobody go tell them off. They just treat it like it's an OK thing for my brother-in-law to loan money and not return and worse of all, never call or come tell us and others they loaned from that sorry they cann't pay more. They have the cheeks to attend CNY and don't feel embarrassed in front of relatives.I already want to give up on my family. You know jojobeach that day my mother called again and asked me for money for medical bills, I finally told her don't call me up for $ again. I told her my hubby is not going to contribute a single cent this time.I am unedr so much stress these few weeks. I can't sleep cos' everytime when I close my esyes, images of my family keeps creeping into my head.
-
Originally posted by starz119:
My hubby is not rich but he works hard for his money. He is thrifty not stingy. When we were dating he would buy me gifts and if older sis happen to know abt it, she will ask the price. If she thinks it's expensive, she will tell everyone my hubby must be rich etc. Sometimes going on a trip to nearby countries are also seem as very rich. To the extent when I receive wedding & birthday gifts from hubby, I feel guilty for having it. See the effect it can have on you. Nowadays, I even ask hubby don't buy presents for all these special ocassions, if buy buy for our kids. My mother knows the 8k I loaned to older sis. Everyone knows but nobody go tell them off. They just treat it like it's an OK thing for my brother-in-law to loan money and not return and worse of all, never call or come tell us and others they loaned from that sorry they cann't pay more. They have the cheeks to attend CNY and don't feel embarrassed in front of relatives.I already want to give up on my family. You know jojobeach that day my mother called again and asked me for money for medical bills, I finally told her don't call me up for $ again. I told her my hubby is not going to contribute a single cent this time.I am unedr so much stress these few weeks. I can't sleep cos' everytime when I close my esyes, images of my family keeps creeping into my head.
Your family has got a very warped aka crap idea of kinship and money... i believe your sis actually has a better place in their heart and condone all of her actions especially to you. It certainly would not feel well in your position. I think if you are feeling so much stress now, you probably should get your husband to make your family(meaning u and your husband) stand clear to your own family. No means No... ultimately you are a married out lady... use those traditional morale thing to talk to them i guess. Aint married not sure what i can offer you. But probably you hubby can come out to ease some of ur burden. Some parents and siblings are jus pure nonsense.As for cassey, nth against you but yes forgiveness is correct, but it is not applicable on every case and scenario, as for TS, i feel forgiveness is not quite possible. Too much of bottled up things and it all takes time. It does not help when TS is facing a immediate problem here but we are offering a solution where we only see the effects 10 years later. Forgiveness is not easy, importantly, it takes time and support for that to take place. TS needs real suggestion in solving immediate problem. Forgiveness is all good, but not useful in this case.
-
Always remember that in a family dispute, there are several versions of the same event.
The perspective from the parents will differ greatly from the view of the TS, and the opinion of the other siblings will also be twisted.
So it is best to just hold you thoughts and emotions, and try as best to be calm and keep the peace.
Just met an in-law at the funeral of a great uncle. The last I saw them was when the children were in JC, now the children are married and have children. Missing gap is because of quarrels over money too. Which now seem petty, the amounts involved around $10,000. On hindsight not worth maintaining animosity for so long over that amount.
Help out a family member, where you can. Don't if you can't. Don't be forced into something you can barely do.
And if you do help, be magnanimous about it.
Don't as in this case, lend and then sulk about it, and spoil the relationship, and risk losing the relationship together with the money.
-
ya, life is not long, money is a material, can be earn or can be lost, just take your lesson in life and move on. I got one classmate who borrow me 1k last time at Haig girl school, she was suppose to help her jobless parent to tide over the difficult time of financial recession, I broke my piggy bank and give to her, cos I rich mah. Then my dad thot I spent on barbie dolls, bought me a big elephant Bank. After so many years, I already forget about the 1k she owe me, we still stay in contact, and met up several times at some outing or school reunion gathering.
During this year CNY, She and her parents visited me, which surprised me, cos I never old classmate's parent visiting me. My Dad and grandma was very happy to welcome guest, especially during CNY to our house, her parents drove a 7 series BMW into our front lawn. Brought along a big CNY hamper with a bottle martel bleu on top, her parents gave me a ang pow, after they left, I opened it, a cheque of 5 thousands was then with a small paper note written, "Dear Angel, without your help, we might not be here, kindly accept our gratitute for your help during our difficult time, thank you"
I shown it to my grandma, she said that is too much, must return, but i took the money and went to korea for a wonderful tour...
-
wah thanks for the tua pow story. Think sgforums has a lot of loonies.
-
To mancha, u can say lif someone lent money but don't sulk when things go wrong later. This isn't just abt money lent. This is abt family member borrowing money and then proceeded to cut off ties with u.I did not on my part initiate the breakup of the relationship between me and my sis. My mother asked me to call my older sis and offer an apology for the dispute. Are u kidding me? My hubby & I are not pleased becos' there is obviously unfairness in this case where bad behaviour on the part of my older sis had been condoned. I can forget abt the 8k but not the hurt. You know the term 'respect'?Basic human respect. We got none. Money is money but what is worse is getting your feelings trampled on and people not showing you an ounce of respect. Yes there are many different versions and many different sides to the same event. I am not perfect, no one is. Don't say over 10k a family can break up, even over 1k, there can be family disputes.
-
Boomz! boomz...