Feeling So Furious, So Evil...
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Have u ever felt like u were belittled? Well, for the past 2 Semester, i used to be late for lessons and end up missing classes, thus not knowing what is going on. So my classmates would assume i would fail. When i dun write notes, they would just say things like:" WAh so PRO ar?" But the fact is tat i was listening and would get notes later. So i passed all my modules for the past 2 sems. And some of them who even went to lessons, failed some.
This sem, its the same thing all over, my grp has got 3 gals, 2 of which are really good frenz and 1 is really a hypocrite. BUt now, even 1 of the 2 gd frenz start to talk in a way tat she looks dwn on me too. When she's dwn, i'll console her. And yet now, she speaks as if i am going to fail and speaks in a manner such as:"Do u noe hw to do this? its not simple u noe as i myself dun even noe." Thus i decided not to go soft when they act to be good. As for the other hypocrite gal, when she passes a test, she just go so happy bout it. When she fails, there are ppl who tok bout their passed test, and she will start to gossip bout them. There are more evil thigns bout her. I noe them coz i was liddat many yrs ago. And these few days, i want to change as i had many bad n sad memories. BUt their actions really make me furious and kinda wanna "pull" the old bad me "alive" again... Its really torturing... I go sch and there i will be, left out and belittled. I tried not to bother but these are direct actions towards me. I really wish to kill them now. I noe if i used old me, they will surely end up horribly... coz i used to have a mouth that will only spread unhappiness among a grp if i want to. I dun want this to happen again... HeLp...
And yeah, i am starting to feel the evil me back... really very agonising... -
Have u ever felt like u were belittled? Well, for the past 2 Semester, i used to be late for lessons and end up missing classes, thus not knowing what is going on. So my classmates would assume i would fail. When i dun write notes, they would just say things like:" WAh so PRO ar?" But the fact is tat i was listening and would get notes later. So i passed all my modules for the past 2 sems. And some of them who even went to lessons, failed some.
This sem, its the same thing all over, my grp has got 3 gals, 2 of which are really good frenz and 1 is really a hypocrite. BUt now, even 1 of the 2 gd frenz start to talk in a way tat she looks dwn on me too. When she's dwn, i'll console her. And yet now, she speaks as if i am going to fail and speaks in a manner such as:"Do u noe hw to do this? its not simple u noe as i myself dun even noe." Thus i decided not to go soft when they act to be good. As for the other hypocrite gal, when she passes a test, she just go so happy bout it. When she fails, there are ppl who tok bout their passed test, and she will start to gossip bout them. There are more evil thigns bout her. I noe them coz i was liddat many yrs ago. And these few days, i want to change as i had many bad n sad memories. BUt their actions really make me furious and kinda wanna "pull" the old bad me "alive" again... Its really torturing... I go sch and there i will be, left out and belittled. I tried not to bother but these are direct actions towards me. I really wish to kill them now. I noe if i used old me, they will surely end up horribly... coz i used to have a mouth that will only spread unhappiness among a grp if i want to. I dun want this to happen again... HeLp...
And yeah, i am starting to believe that there are no good people in this world... and that i should go back to my old self, which is nv to trust ppl anymore... -
you know what it's like to be terrible and the harm it can cause.. from both sides...
so do think.. and tell yourself.. i'm above that now..
and move on..
it's not easy but that's the way to move on, be a better person in life
i wish you serenity.. then you can put aside whatever those who are terrible try to cause to you, and you can let it go, and be a good person -
Why bother about what they say? Let them be lor..Actions speak louder than words. They are not true friends..juz your companions...dun take it so hard. You study for your own sake. People come and go..You can live without them. Dun do evil..coz what goes around, comes around.Originally posted by w1nd:Have u ever felt like u were belittled? Well, for the past 2 Semester, i used to be late for lessons and end up missing classes, thus not knowing what is going on. So my classmates would assume i would fail. When i dun write notes, they would just say things like:" WAh so PRO ar?" But the fact is tat i was listening and would get notes later. So i passed all my modules for the past 2 sems. And some of them who even went to lessons, failed some.
This sem, its the same thing all over, my grp has got 3 gals, 2 of which are really good frenz and 1 is really a hypocrite. BUt now, even 1 of the 2 gd frenz start to talk in a way tat she looks dwn on me too. When she's dwn, i'll console her. And yet now, she speaks as if i am going to fail and speaks in a manner such as:"Do u noe hw to do this? its not simple u noe as i myself dun even noe." Thus i decided not to go soft when they act to be good. As for the other hypocrite gal, when she passes a test, she just go so happy bout it. When she fails, there are ppl who tok bout their passed test, and she will start to gossip bout them. There are more evil thigns bout her. I noe them coz i was liddat many yrs ago. And these few days, i want to change as i had many bad n sad memories. BUt their actions really make me furious and kinda wanna "pull" the old bad me "alive" again... Its really torturing... I go sch and there i will be, left out and belittled. I tried not to bother but these are direct actions towards me. I really wish to kill them now. I noe if i used old me, they will surely end up horribly... coz i used to have a mouth that will only spread unhappiness among a grp if i want to. I dun want this to happen again... HeLp...
And yeah, i am starting to feel the evil me back... really very agonising... -
Hey! I feel the same way as u... feeling belittled and under-estimated.. but sometimes it's a good thing... DUn see things so negatively alrite? I noe it feels horrible.. I'm an easily-hurt person too... so some of my frens' comments do come down harsh on me.. Well.. those people whom i bear a grudge towards or treat me so poorly, I just simply dun treat them as my close frens!
Why not U try to distant urself from those people who antagnoize u? hehe.... I mean.. maybe u are happier alone.. I am fortunate i have other close frens who stand by me...
Hope u find better frens soon.... Don't think so much abt their comments.. but think if they are sincere frens who are worth befriending... Cheers! -
Either choice - get bothered or don't bother.Originally posted by w1nd:Have u ever felt like u were belittled? Well, for the past 2 Semester, i used to be late for lessons and end up missing classes, thus not knowing what is going on. So my classmates would assume i would fail. When i dun write notes, they would just say things like:" WAh so PRO ar?" But the fact is tat i was listening and would get notes later. So i passed all my modules for the past 2 sems. And some of them who even went to lessons, failed some.
This sem, its the same thing all over, my grp has got 3 gals, 2 of which are really good frenz and 1 is really a hypocrite. BUt now, even 1 of the 2 gd frenz start to talk in a way tat she looks dwn on me too. When she's dwn, i'll console her. And yet now, she speaks as if i am going to fail and speaks in a manner such as:"Do u noe hw to do this? its not simple u noe as i myself dun even noe." Thus i decided not to go soft when they act to be good. As for the other hypocrite gal, when she passes a test, she just go so happy bout it. When she fails, there are ppl who tok bout their passed test, and she will start to gossip bout them. There are more evil thigns bout her. I noe them coz i was liddat many yrs ago. And these few days, i want to change as i had many bad n sad memories. BUt their actions really make me furious and kinda wanna "pull" the old bad me "alive" again... Its really torturing... I go sch and there i will be, left out and belittled. I tried not to bother but these are direct actions towards me. I really wish to kill them now. I noe if i used old me, they will surely end up horribly... coz i used to have a mouth that will only spread unhappiness among a grp if i want to. I dun want this to happen again... HeLp...
And yeah, i am starting to feel the evil me back... really very agonising...
When I am undergoing my sh|t period, had a case of me being minded for not doing homework, go lecture, etc and was sarcastically put down in front of the whole class. My usual self wouldn't be bothered by all these, just that it HAPPENED during my sh|t period of my life and I got pissed.
When I got out of my sh|t period - she din bothered me anymore. Now? She became nearly an outcast.
Turn evil? You will be damn foolish if you were to change BECAUSE of someone you dislike. She is neither your gf nor wife - why must you change yourself because of her?
Cheers -
Well, thanks but... no way i can distance... they are in my project grp... kinda sucky...
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its difficult isin't it? to have to fight to keep your "dark side" under control. I know how u feel... my dark side was terrible too.... the thing is, its horrible because we actually enjoy our dark sides, even though it causes harm and hurt to all around us. This is very Star Wars I know, but the thing is we must not give in to our dark sides, because it IS the easy path to take......
well...... always try to be in control.... thats all i can say. -
kinda wanna "pull" the old bad me "alive" again
HAHAHA Good for you! Embrace the hate and anger. More importantly, make a list of all people whom you want silenced. Keep that list, grow powerful and pay "visits" to everyone on that list. Tis what I'm doing. -
Originally posted by men_@_arms:
Hmm....
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HAHAHA Good for you! Embrace the hate and anger. More importantly, make a list of all people whom you want silenced. Keep that list, grow powerful and pay "visits" to everyone on that list. Tis what I'm doing.[/b]