Confuse
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I've know this gal 'S', 4 abt slightly more den a yr.But only recently did we start sms and going out frequently. I go to know her thru my gf (she is a fren of hers).I feel comfortable with her around more than being with my gf, we share the same interests.Recently i felt myself smilling whenever i think of her or receive her sms.
Everytime we went out i would lie to my gf.Cos she is the possessive type nv liking me to met my frens who r not up to her expectation or with gals, even her own frens!!! I dun like that feeling of lying but when i saw her 'S' it seems like nothing in the world matters. My own relationship wih my gf hav nv been good due to a lot of difference between us.The fact we are still together till now is that i keep on giving in to her apologizing for thing which i feels are not even my fault
Now i am totally confuse, i feel that i hav a responsibility to my gf and yet that is only a responsibility . For 'S' i dun noe whether i m infatuated with her or im really feeling something 4 her???
I want to noe how she feels, yet never dare ask. I dun even noe how i feel
Sometime i feel like i shd jus give up n remain as frens. I ask myself wat could come out of this but yet i dunno... 
How do i noe if i really luv her? Does responsibility counts more than luv itself? I dun believe in two timing it not fair to anyone. I dun want to confess to her and if she does not hav the same feelings i dun want her to start advoiding me or me advoiding her. HOW...WAT can i do to noe her feelings????
Wat can or shd i do???? Wat m i doing?? -
WOW! HOW DID YOU MANAGE THIS ONE!!!????
Sounds like youÂ’re with the wrong girl mate! Why did you get with your girlfriend in the first place?
Right a relationship has a thing called “trust” in it, and yours is slowing just becoming a lie. You need to find out if this other girl likes you (you don’t need to tell her that you like her but just drop some hints) you also need to think about who you love, no one else can decide for you.
Also you need to think of your girlfriend and her mateÂ… if you brake up with your lass to go out with her mate then your lass (or ex as it may be) and your new lass will probably most defiantly not be mates any moreÂ… you are risking there friendship! Also if you as your lasses mate if she likes you and she doesnÂ’t (in that way) and she knows you like her she will probably tell her mate (your lass)!! And then you might lose your lass and your lasses mate.. Confusing!!
You figure which one you like the most and also is it worth risking itÂ… know one can tell you what to do till you figure out your feelings.
I hope I have helped and not confused everyone even more but figure out your TRUE feelings then get back in touch with me!
Later mate good luck!
Sarah x
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one leg step 2 boats...
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Dun condemn so fast mah,Originally posted by sgboy2004:one leg step 2 boats...
He hasn't done anything wrong to his gf yet, just thoughts.
U haven't right?? -
Originally posted by I)(z()n: I've know this gal 'S', 4 abt slightly more den a yr.But only recently did we start sms and going out frequently. I go to know her thru my gf (she is a fren of hers).I feel comfortable with her around more than being with my gf, we share the same interests.Recently i felt myself smilling whenever i think of her or receive her sms.
Everytime we went out i would lie to my gf.Cos she is the possessive type nv liking me to met my frens who r not up to her expectation or with gals, even her own frens!!! I dun like that feeling of lying but when i saw her 'S' it seems like nothing in the world matters. My own relationship wih my gf hav nv been good due to a lot of difference between us.The fact we are still together till now is that i keep on giving in to her apologizing for thing which i feels are not even my fault
Now i am totally confuse, i feel that i hav a responsibility to my gf and yet that is only a responsibility . For 'S' i dun noe whether i m infatuated with her or im really feeling something 4 her???
I want to noe how she feels, yet never dare ask. I dun even noe how i feel Sometime i feel like i shd jus give up n remain as frens. I ask myself wat could come out of this but yet i dunno...
How do i noe if i really luv her? Does responsibility counts more than luv itself? I dun believe in two timing it not fair to anyone. I dun want to confess to her and if she does not hav the same feelings i dun want her to start advoiding me or me advoiding her. HOW...WAT can i do to noe her feelings????
Wat can or shd i do???? Wat m i doing?? 
You are stuck in a dilemma on whether you should listen to your mind or your heart; regardless, as time pass, you will eventually discover that you are leading towards the latter. You should discover by now that by itself and only itself, sense of responsibility is kinda bullsh|t - you can't retain a person's feeling through morals and ethics. Love is spiritual, it bypass through whatever mental barrier you impose on yourself.
You have three choice
(I) to continue your relationship and suffer through being with someone you have little love with.
(II) To give up present gf and pursue potential relationship
(III) Opt for two timing. Among all these choices, (III) is totally out of question IF you want to get out of your mess, because it will implicate your situation. You can decide about (I) or (II). Lets go through it slowly then.
What if you stay in the relationship? It is possible as a decision - however, its not about just remaining and that's it. Attempts has to be made to rectify the issues in your relationship (possessiveness, lack of trust, etc) and tons of communication with your gf. Conclusion, acceptance and lines must be drawn. It is the 'harder' option as expanding effort to REBUILD relationship is NEVER easy. But it can be very rewarding at the end of the day, if things work out. Afterall, what makes you think S defintely likes you the way you do (even though its likely) or things will be better? And even if it doesn't work out - bottomline is that you did what you can, instead of running away.
(II) Option? My version of this decision is not to ship-hop at first sight of opportunity. Probably you already did what you can in the relationship already; maybe the aftermath of choosing decision (I) - then if the relationship were to vanish - do not jump into another boat of love straight away. You may want to clear up some emotional turmoils and mental issues away first. This will probably take up to 1 - 3 months. Take this time to get to know S better as well - don't talk about feelings with her. Just know as a causal friend. Because if you do, chances are, you both will be together soon enough, together all these undissolve matters in yourself and it will bring about greater problems.
P.S: Life is about decision making - everyone is doing it everyday. What matters is that the decision you make, will not bring about greater issues to settle in the future. You should be rational to think long term and the possible complication that could occur. Use all this time now.
Cheers -
It's not because of differences that you leave a relationship for another, because in any r/s there will be differences... there' no such thing as a perfect match without ironing out the rough edges. I'm also pretty sure, from time to time, our parents argue too.. it's inevitable.
Furthermore, it's usually when things turn sour in a r/s one will look for interests in other place, and may mistake the curiosity in finding out more about a person to be a liking for that person, which unfortuantely, is usually the case in many situations.
However, I'm not a person who agrees with possessiveness... as it doesn't mean knowing your every movement is trust. In fact, there's nothing for a guy to go out with a girl alone or vice versa, as long as you for sure know that you're going out as a friend and nothing more. Like you don't going out with a girl, thinking you can woo her. In addition, I do support that people should have a life of their own, during a r/s or marriage. -
RESERVED PARKING?Originally posted by Yunhaier:*Write later*
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1st of all, let's set 'S' aside. For your current relationship with your gf, how long have it been? If you feel that things don't work out between you and your gf, you should let her know about in one way or another? (unless you intend to just keep things that way and you're contented with it...?) Responsibility is a factor in a relationship. But 'Responsibility' usually shouldn't be the MAIN reason for a relationship. Especially for a BGR, it can be a rather WEAK result. BGR is usually with chosen partner and not inborn ones as in family relationship or business relationship (though not inborn) where you sometimes have little choices. BEFORE anything with 'S', I'll advise you to figure out what's going on with your current relationship 1st... The reason(s) for both of you to be together in the 1st place should be reviewed...Originally posted by I)(z()n: I've know this gal 'S', 4 abt slightly more den a yr.But only recently did we start sms and going out frequently. I go to know her thru my gf (she is a fren of hers).I feel comfortable with her around more than being with my gf, we share the same interests.Recently i felt myself smilling whenever i think of her or receive her sms.
Everytime we went out i would lie to my gf.Cos she is the possessive type nv liking me to met my frens who r not up to her expectation or with gals, even her own frens!!! I dun like that feeling of lying but when i saw her 'S' it seems like nothing in the world matters. My own relationship wih my gf hav nv been good due to a lot of difference between us.The fact we are still together till now is that i keep on giving in to her apologizing for thing which i feels are not even my fault
Now i am totally confuse, i feel that i hav a responsibility to my gf and yet that is only a responsibility . For 'S' i dun noe whether i m infatuated with her or im really feeling something 4 her???
I want to noe how she feels, yet never dare ask. I dun even noe how i feel Sometime i feel like i shd jus give up n remain as frens. I ask myself wat could come out of this but yet i dunno...
How do i noe if i really luv her? Does responsibility counts more than luv itself? I dun believe in two timing it not fair to anyone. I dun want to confess to her and if she does not hav the same feelings i dun want her to start advoiding me or me advoiding her. HOW...WAT can i do to noe her feelings????
Wat can or shd i do???? Wat m i doing??
Then come 'S'. Should only be that close after you resolves the ongoings of your current relationship (unless you don't mind of being accused as double-timing)... Should be a new start if your current relationship is to end? Don't make too much spectaculations... Just go with the flow... -
NO lar! Hahahaha!Originally posted by Devil1976:RESERVED PARKING? 
Click wrongly yesterday and send message halfway, then I was chatting with my old fwen who was ranting to me alot of sh|t. Then decide to reply next morning. -
Originally posted by I)(z()n:
In my opinion, the feelings u hav for 'S' is refreshing as its so much diff fr the feeling ur gf gave.... Juz imagine when u start off wif ur gf, isz similar? Things r oways diff when in r/s...
Everytime we went out i would lie to my gf.[b]Cos she is the possessive type nv liking me to met my frens who r not up to her expectation or with gals, even her own frens!!! I dun like that feeling of lying but when i saw her 'S' it seems like nothing in the world matters. My own relationship wih my gf hav nv been good due to a lot of difference between us.The fact we are still together till now is that i keep on giving in to her apologizing for thing which i feels are not even my fault
How do i noe if i really luv her? Does responsibility counts more than luv itself? I dun believe in two timing it not fair to anyone. I dun want to confess to her and if she does not hav the same feelings i dun want her to start advoiding me or me advoiding her. HOW...WAT can i do to noe her feelings????
Wat can or shd i do???? Wat m i doing??[/b]
As 4 ur gf, u mentioned she is possessive, tis might mean tat she doesn't have much confidence in herself of keeping u by her side... she is oso afraid she might lost u...
I wld suggest u hav a gd talk wif 'S', but if she the shy type... den juz observe 4 e time being... -
Thanks for all the advice given but i am still not sure on howi i m going to proceed
And no i have not done anything wrong yet. I think i still need some time to think this thru.. -
Good luck n all the best... Hope you know what you're doing?
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To love someone is nothing. To be loved by someone is something. To love and be loved by someone is everything
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If you love someone, make sure you tell them... sometimes you only get one chance.